Health Depression

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Think I finally might go see a doctor. Every ****ing day I wake up with a feeling of utter dread and melancholy. Just absolutely talk myself down to some pretty dark places and it's starting to worry me. I generally try to use humour to cover it up when I'm around people but I can't even be bothered doing that lately, and then I feel bad for not wanting to be around anyone. Fuuuuuuuck.
 
Bump.

I've been constantly down since the start of the year. The thing is, I can't exactly pinpoint why. I'm always keen to bawl my eyes out, you know. It's fvcked up. I'm desperate to feel happy on a regular basis. I'm exercising 6 days a week, eating healthier food, TRYING to sleep more. It just isn't working. I'm in a non-stop unmotivated state with a majority of things in my life. I missed Futsal today purely because I was too sad. Ugh. I'm a 19 year old guy, I should be mentally strong if anything.
 
You're doing the right things as far as addressing how you feel. Diet and exercise are huge factors on peoples well being. Fresh uncooked fruit and vegetables provide the best nutrition to address the diet side.

I can only relate things I have personally done to address feeling down and get to a point of well being I am content with. I looked at my social network and harshly removed negative people around me and looked to engage in more social activities that opened me to new learning experiences and new people. I learnt to play guitar which was very therapeutic. I addressed my diet as I was eating complete crap, I still carry weight but I feel way healthier. I began volunteer work, latest research shows that volunteer work provides participants with fulfilment that can be very difficult to obtain anywhere else. I really enjoy helping kids who have learning difficulties, something I would have laughed at the suggestion of only 3 years ago.

I set some goals long and short term. Stuff like doing one thing per week that is just for me that I enjoy and is totally selfish, making sure I get away for a holiday at least once a year, make sure that Im always learning something new and seeking out knowledge and information, longer term goals of career change into a more fulfilling profession. I make sure the people I love know that I value them and love them even if they don't want to hear it, I'm not telling them for their sake lol. I also chose to no longer be angry or frustrated with other peoples actions or words. Often I allowed my emotions to dictate how I felt. Now I choose to be happy and choose not to react emotionally to situations that once would have seen me spiral down emotionally, once I made that choice, and it is a choice, things don't seem to effect me like they used to. I am about to start getting into meditation as the latest research shows its effects on people with physical, emotional and mental issues has massive benefits in finding inner peace and building coping tools. I researched and now use techniques such as pure mindfulness or pure awareness which is about being mindful of my thoughts and self talk and by being disciplined enough to recognise negative thoughts that aren't constructive I block out alot of crap that I found myself thinking about that was old shit I just dwelled on that I couldn't change and wasn't going to benefit me going forward by thinking about it.

Essentially what I have worked on is a process that took a long time to get right and works for me that is a process I can fall back on when I am not feeling so good.

Don't ever feel bad about how you feel, up or down just embrace change and exploring new things, some things might work, alot wont, but you will always move forward if you commit to making change from where you currently are. Beats doing the same shit and getting the same result.
 

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if you feel like crying, go into your room, and have a cry.

it's a perfectly normal human expression of emotions and it's important (i believe) to let it out.

crying is hormonal and can serve to relax yourself.
 
JD11 said:
if you feel like crying, go into your room, and have a cry.

it's a perfectly normal human expression of emotions and it's important (i believe) to let it out.

crying is hormonal and can serve to relax yourself.
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Unfortunately we don't live in that type of society. It's weakness to express any type of emotion, even anger or frustration are frowned upon if you express them.
 
I come from the perspective of someone who doesn't suffer from depression myself, but I have grown up with my mother who has been living with it for 45 years, and in addition, my father was diagnosed with it five years ago too.

Both my grandmothers had it too- both made attempts on their lives, but they weren't successful, thankfully.

In other words- if you subscribe to the theory that it can run in families, there's a chance I could be a candidate at some point. I most certainly hope that never comes to fruition.

I'm going to quote part of something I wrote back in August 2010- it focuses somewhat on my attempts to come to understand what it must be like for my mother to live with it, and some of the leading elements of frustration that can define watching someone go through it, and how you can sometimes feel quite helpless about it:


There are some people who, for varying and often understandable reasons, come to define themselves not by who they are in their entirety, but rather an element of their life (whether that be an event, a profession, an illness- whatever) - so namely, that element becomes their entirety and they use the element as the yardstick by which all is measured and seen. This doesn't necessarily have to imply a wholly negative connotation- for example, the stories of some writers literally locking themselves away from the world for months while they shape their next literary offering are well known. And to a lesser degree perhaps, even students will be well aware of the feeling of their life, and indeed being, being defined by how much of that essay is left to write, whether they've done the referencing the right way, what time the library closes- us university students have all been there at some point. And if you haven't, then you surely will in the future.

All in all though, beyond becoming a slightly boring and reclusive hermit, this sort of one-dimensional living is harmless enough. What can't be considered quite as harmless is when an individual falls into the temptation to abdicate responsibility over themselves, and ultimately their actions, by effectively implying they are somehow devoid of the ability to fully control their actions because of a given third factor; in other words, "don't blame me for any faults, perceived or otherwise, they're all because of x". Without wanting to climb onto the soap box and turn this into a rant-fest, such abdication of responsibility is something that has always made me very frustrated and probably at least part of the reason for that is that I have grown up with firsthand experience of the phenomenon. A key figure in my life, in fact without a doubt the single most influential person in my life, has long suffered from depression. I am no expert and not for a second have I ever, or would I ever, question that depression is a legitimate condition going far beyond someone just feeling a little 'down' or having a case of the 'winter blues'. Whatever metaphor one uses as a yardstick, I am more than aware and accepting that the aforementioned metaphors do little justice in terms of recognising the legitimacy of depression as a genuine condition.

No matter how genuine it is, however, there is one thing that I have found completely inexcusable and irreconcilable, and that is the refusal- there is no other way to describe it- of the person in question to change aspects of their behaviour which are genuinely destructive, especially as they themselves realise the destructive nature of their behaviour. For example, they are more than aware of their tendency to initially focus on the negative and only consider something, or someone, in a more balanced and even perspective later- often after they've already erroneously shared the initial negative. But rather than learn from the negative fallout that inevitably results, and perhaps think twice and simply keep their lips sealed henceforth, they will make the same mistake- over and over- and dismiss any protest at this repetition as lacking savvy and understanding. So not only is that an abdication of responsibility, it is also a perfect demonstration of the victim mentality (I'm treading on very thin ice going here, I realise!) that permeates throughout this person's existence.
So my question from all this is, can such people, and the millions of others around the world who no doubt face similar predicaments, actually have control over their thoughts, their actions? Or have they become such a slave to their illnesses, their pasts and their circumstances, and so ingrained in feeling helpless (or at least believing this to be the case), that rational thought and action is, well...less than possible?
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That's only part of what I wrote, but it's the most pertinent to the topic.

I have enormous sympathy and understanding for anyone who goes through what I've witnessed first hand with my mother, but I must admit I'm still no closer to understanding the answers to the questions I posed at the end.
 
I'm extremely concerned about my mother. Family history of depression, schizophrenia and suicide coupled with a less than stellar home environment, chronic depression on and off for most of the year for over a decade, chronic pain from ank. spond. and the fact that she is really psychomotor ******ed at the moment makes me think I should probably have her detained. No idea what to do, she won't accept help. She's stopped speaking to people. Hasn't gone out with friends or family for over a year.

She'll disown me if I call an ambulance and have her taken away. I've never really seen her happy for more than a couple of hours at a time so I'm not even sure if treatment will really help her, but she's not coming through this without meds or ECT.

She took 6 hours yesterday writing a 100 word email to her sister telling her she wasn't going to be able to make it to dinner next week, which is disturbing on so many levels I don't even want to think about it.
 
That would be an extremely difficult situation.

The only advice i can think of is for you to see a psychologist because they will give you strategies to deal with the situation. Also they will have suggestions on options for your mum.
 
I talked to her about it. It was worse than I expected actually. I've torn up her scripts for medications and will give her meds each day as she needs. She has agreed to see a psychiatrist.

Shit happens.
 
This isnt a cry for help or attention seeking or anything like that but felt i needed to vent.
The last 6 years have been fked. Did my back, collapsed disc in my spine so cant play footy and get tingles all the time down my legs so stacked on weight.
Fathered a child who i havent seen since she was 2 weeks old from a one night stand just before i started seeing my wife who since has left me due to my depression and gambling addiction. Im $35k in debt with the bank due to gambling and really struggle to stop.
Lost my best friend and wife to it, want her back so much but she doesnt love me anymore so i pretty much sit around all day thinking about dying and get fk all sleep cause of it. Tried diff medications but had allergic reactions to all of them so not touching them.
Gonna talk to my olds tonight where im currently staying as they think im off the punt but cant lie about it anymore.
they were gonna help pay off my $20k loan but in the past 2 months ive borrowed more and lost it all and maybe there is no point in them helping me.
Thinking about bankruptcy and starting off with a clean slate. Not even sure if i would qualify.
Im at a stage where my life revolves around my bets and i couldnt care less if i lived or died to be honest.

Anyways just needed to vent
 
Primetime Pricey said:
This isnt a cry for help or attention seeking or anything like that but felt i needed to vent.
The last 6 years have been fked. Did my back, collapsed disc in my spine so cant play footy and get tingles all the time down my legs so stacked on weight.
Fathered a child who i havent seen since she was 2 weeks old from a one night stand just before i started seeing my wife who since has left me due to my depression and gambling addiction. Im $35k in debt with the bank due to gambling and really struggle to stop.
Lost my best friend and wife to it, want her back so much but she doesnt love me anymore so i pretty much sit around all day thinking about dying and get fk all sleep cause of it. Tried diff medications but had allergic reactions to all of them so not touching them.
Gonna talk to my olds tonight where im currently staying as they think im off the punt but cant lie about it anymore.
they were gonna help pay off my $20k loan but in the past 2 months ive borrowed more and lost it all and maybe there is no point in them helping me.
Thinking about bankruptcy and starting off with a clean slate. Not even sure if i would qualify.
Im at a stage where my life revolves around my bets and i couldnt care less if i lived or died to be honest.

Anyways just needed to vent
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Dude, have you tried these guys

http://www.sagamblingtherapy.com.au/

I can recomend their treatment and they also have access to psychiatrists/ psycholgists.

That's if you're still in SA. If not PM me
 
CLUBMEDhurst said:
Dude, have you tried these guys

http://www.sagamblingtherapy.com.au/

I can recomend their treatment and they also have access to psychiatrists/ psycholgists.

That's if you're still in SA. If not PM me
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yeah i have tried them. I went to Gamblers Anonymous and was also seeing a pyschologist on the side but i didnt get much out of it cause i was still punting and i dont think i was 100% committed to it you know? I will prob start seeing someone at some stage but i live in Hamley Bridge so it makes it tough since its not in the suburbs.
 

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Yeah i know. i gambled as a release from my other issues but in the end it obviously didnt help and made things worse. made a lot of mistakes. The problem with depression and being really depressed it just makes situations seem a lot worse then what they probably are but its real difficult to get out of that thought process so at the moment im in one of those "the world is ending and caving in on me" spots where its prob not like that.
 
nicky said:
Yeah you probably shouldn't take money from your parents if you have no intention to stop gambling.
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its not that there is no intention to stop, i want to stop its just how can i take that money and then just say in 6 months time something happens and i gamble again? it doesnt really help them.
 
Primetime Pricey said:
its not that there is no intention to stop, i want to stop its just how can i take that money and then just say in 6 months time something happens and i gamble again? it doesnt really help them.
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No, you have no intention of stopping, lets be real about this.

And if you're taking money from people close to you, then lying about it so you can gamble some more, then that is probably why you feel depressed.
 
nicky said:
No, you have no intention of stopping, lets be real about this.

And if you're taking money from people close to you, then lying about it so you can gamble some more, then that is probably why you feel depressed.
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i had depression before the gambling took a real hold of me.
ive been through a lot of stuff and i used the gambling as a release. I have stopped for gambling with the intent to never gamble again for months and months but when something bad happens ive gone back to it. Ive put things in place in the past to not gamble like going to the Casino and putting a ban on myself so i cant go in there, gone to pubs and put a ban on being served in there, ive suspended my accounts online with online betting.
Ive never borrowed money off people to bet, ive always used my own or got small loans from the bank to play with.
The folks were going to pay off my loan that i had and then i was gonna pay them back weekly and give them my tax return which is always $5k. I just feel its prob not worth them doing it, i should handle the situation myself and not be bailed out.
 
Sorry for being a cow pricey.

Forthwrite is 100% right though. Tell the mods to ban you from the betting board. I got them to ban me from the crime board because my morbid fascination with serial killers was making me feel like crap.
 
Forthwrite said:
Pricey,

Why don't you ask one of the mods to ban you from BigFooty for a few months while you go and seek help?

You post constantly in the betting thread on the Basketball board and I really can't see you getting away from gambling whilst being on here.
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i like posting on BigFooty but ur prob right in regards to the betting thread. I will chat with PN.
 
nicky said:
No, you have no intention of stopping, lets be real about this.

And if you're taking money from people close to you, then lying about it so you can gamble some more, then that is probably why you feel depressed.
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Not like you to be so dispassionate.

I'd suggest you be careful about making such assessments as well.

You don't know what reaction you could trigger.

And I know a bit about the subject by the way, I'm not speaking through my hat........
 
Gamblers annoy me because i have a family member who has gambled alot of money (over 100 k) and they continue to gamble, borrow money and lie even when caugh red handed.

It's so annoying that i have to pay for so many things for them because they gamble all their money away. I feel like i'm inadvertently giving money to the gambling industry.

Anyway they feel depressed and it's no wonder when they don't have an honest relationship in their life due to a stupid, pointless gambling habbit.

I don't understand gambling so am the wrong person to speak to about it. :)
 
nicky said:
Gamblers annoy me because i have a family member who has gambled alot of money (over 100 k) and they continue to gamble, borrow money and lie even when caugh red handed.

It's so annoying that i have to pay for so many things for them because they gamble all their money away. I feel like i'm inadvertently giving money to the gambling industry.

Anyway they feel depressed and it's no wonder when they don't have an honest relationship in their life due to a stupid, pointless gambling habbit.

I don't understand gambling so am the wrong person to speak to about it. :)
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It's an addiction Nicky, as harmful as any drug addiction

Neuroimaging studies found that gambling associated cognitive and motivational events, or responses of pathological gamblers to gambling-related stimuli, are associated with metabolic changes in brain regions implicated in studies of substance use disorders. Gambling cue presentation elicits gambling urges and leads to a temporally dynamic pattern of brain activity changes in frontal, paralimbic, and limbic brain structures. Studies of twins indicate shared genetic contributions for the development of pathological gambling and alcohol dependence. Recent research on the neurobiological basis of pathological gambling indicates that there is an abnormal dopamine, serotonin and noradrenergic neurotransmitter activity in pathological gambling. Deficiencies in dopamine regulation in pathological gambling point to vulnerabilities not only for developing pathological gambling, but also for other addictive behaviors.
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http://www.internetandpsychiatry.co...ive-gambling/49-neurobiology-of-gambling.html
 
To all that go through depression or anxiety, never forget that you are not alone. That is the biggest thing to remember. So many people go through a stage of this in their lives.

Good thread for people to vent and be heard which is the biggest tool in recovery. A pair of ears is better than a dosage of drugs. Particularly, a pair of empathetic ears are the best ones.

One last thing, try to tap into your spiritual side of things. It's something we all have.

Good luck to all on their journey of recovery.
 
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