TSWRA"Dude, you go for Richmond."
It was such a compelling smack-down, an irrefutable rebuttal that rendered all previous statements null and void. It meant: "Your team is unsuccessful, therefore your opinion on football is worthless."
Of course, it was nonsense, but many persisted. But now, the tables have turned. Richmond are the champs, and are so good it is apparently bad for football. Teeth are being gnashed, Geelong supporters are frightened to go to the footy, and the grand final should be best of three, played on the moon, or be decided by rock-paper-scissors, whichever creates the best chance for Richmond to lose.
The non-Richmond-supporting football world is losing its collective mind. Y'all can't cope, much like the teams you support can't cope with our relentless pressure, elite skills, superior strategy, and gut-busting running.
Many of you are bewildered, frightened, disbelieving of the stunning and complete turnaround in the football balance of power. You don't understand the modern game. You bleat that Richmond has a soft draw, or a cheat ground, or gets a free ride with the umps despite having the worst free kick differential in the comp for the second year running. You think Joe Daniher can kick 100, or Christian Petracca is the Next Dusty, or some other ridiculous theory. You're like a mule with a spinning wheel.
Never fear. I am here to help. Using the logic that made "Dude, you go for Richmond" such an infallible put-down, "Dude, I go for Richmond" means "My team is the best, therefore my footy knowledge is superior to all and sundry."
So, friends, this is a safe place. Ask me anything about football and I will give you the answer, and it will be right, because Dude, I go for Richmond.
Enlightenment awaits, friends.
To short would read again.