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Falloon - what's he doing? Packing his bags!

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Not bRyan MacMillian

"Dear Diary,

Strangers have started to call out Bry Bry whenever they see me. Mum was right about stranger danger, they scary.

Also, Kane Cornes did well today, got plenty of the ball. Still my favorite player, he always keeps me busy."
 
"Dear Diary,

Today, Alipate and I went for a bike ride up to crafers and then chilled at Hahndorf and had a few doughnuts and pies to restore our depleted glycogen levels and aid in our recovery."
 

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"Dear Diary,

I'm beginning to doubt whether my fitness regime is suitable. When I was told that Port play Playstation Football, I thought that meant the key focus of training should be on preventing thumb injuries. "
 
Blissid said:
"Dear Diary,

Today, Alipate and I went for a bike ride up to crafers and then chilled at Hahndorf and had a few doughnuts and pies to restore our depleted glycogen levels and aid in our recovery."
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"Dear Diary,
Quick update. I learned what glycogen is today, Wow, what a useful "multibranched polysaccharide". I have no idea what that means, but we learn it in class tomorrow. I Learning."
 
"Dear Diary,

When Matty was showing me which muscle groups he wanted the boys to work on this year, I got lost in his impressive muscle definition, piercing blue eyes and heady musk, and I can't remember what he said. Currently planning to wing it."
 
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"Dear Diary,
Today we........yeah I got nothing"​
 
"Dear Diary,

Port are really well resourced, but its weird. When I told Rohdey that we need to get some medicine balls like players have at the Bulldogs, he got me 40 of these big, heavy, rubbery things when I was expecting small crumbly white lumps like Will Minson used to carry around. The Port version is much harder to snort, but I'm sure the boys will work out what to do."
 
"Dear Diary,

Had a confusing conversation with Rohdey today. He called me into his office, told me that me performance was sub-standard and that I was walking on thin ice - I was really worried. Then he offered me a three-year contract extension."
 
"Dear Diary,

Every player is getting personal bests with all of their weights training. Have no idea what the difference between the brands Kilo and Pound are yet. Finding out is another thing I must add to my "to do list"."
 
"Dear Diary,

The Port coaching staff operate at a really high level, I'm worried that I might not be up to standard. Even Carry says he's got a therapeutic background as an expert in Thai Punching Massage, which I hadn't heard of, and everyone s******ed when I asked what it was. Luckily Carry has offered to demonstrate it on me after training."
 

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"Dear Diary,
Today we lost to GWS, I had to console matty in the rooms. Too cheer him up, I offered him a 3 year contract extension and promised him i'd hold on to his buddies Cam, Ryan and Jason. I also made sure Hitchy was stitched up for next year and made the effort to see if Petters was up for a comeback. Matty always felt Petters was a good bloke to have around the club."
 
"Dear Diary,

I spoke to KT today about applying for the head coaching position. He commented that if I were head coach instead of in my current role, our fitness KPIs would improve immeasurably - after that chat I'm feeling really confident about my chances! Maybe I can get Dan Comerford back to take my old job."
 
"Dear Diary,

I've been given the difficult task of working out a rehabilitation routine for Schulzy, but I can't find a Jazzercise workout designed to repair damage to internal organs. Fortunately Schulzy says Carry's Thai Punching Massage is working ok for now - whew!"
 
"Dear Diary,

Rohdey has been reviewing my off-season expense account, and there have been a couple of hairy moments - I had trouble justifying my fact-finding tour to New Orleans for injury prevention techniques, particularly given the gris-gris I bought for Hammer doesn't seem to work. Fortunately I had the sample the missus needs for IVF in my pocket, so I told Rohdey it was Louisiana alligator cartilage serum that Hammer needed to drink immediately, but I forgot to swap it out after the meeting. Oops! Luckily Hammer didn't get injured this week, but now I'm stuck producing serum every day, so I had to add an extra wank break to my afternoon schedule, bringing the total up to 10 a day during work hours. The missus wonders why I'm so tired every night, but despite all the stress it brings, I'm just happy to be part of the Port Adelaide Football Club."
 

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"Dear Diary,

There was an open training session at Alberton that I was personally invited to (Thank God Matty's gone!). They even let me bring in swish bang new laptop, the spell check feature thing is amazing! Andy said he'd introduce me to the "Find - Replace" and "Copy - Paste" feature of this program, he tells me it makes writing long articles easier by reusing older pieces of information we are understood to bring up.

I wish I knew the players names and faces, they all look so similar. But it's alright because Andy has the same problem with this bunch of silly billies."
 
PatientMental said:
"Dear Diary,

There was an open training session at Alberton that I was personally invited to (Thank God Matty's gone!). They even let me bring in swish bang new laptop, the spell check feature thing is amazing! Andy said he'd introduce me to the "Find - Replace" and "Copy - Paste" feature of this program, he tells me it makes writing long articles easier by reusing older pieces of information we are understood to bring up.

I wish I knew the players names and faces, they all look so similar. But it's alright because Andy has the same problem with this bunch of silly billies."
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Falloon - what's he doing? Packing his bags!

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