Football Jokes!

[blackdiamond]

We have our General Jokes Thread but I thought that seeing we are all here because of football it would be a good idea to start a Football Jokes Thread!

There have been some rippers over the years and the latest Wayne Carey is just adding to them, so if you know any just post them here!

 

[maccas_no1]

Port Power there is a good joke

 

[roostersgal4eva]

Originally posted by maccas_no1
Port Power there is a good joke

GOLD

the funniest carey joke was the 1 about if port got him their lineup would be Carey Laid Stevens

Whist it's mean it it still verry funny

 

[Carlos]

Originally posted by roostersgal4eva
the funniest carey joke was the 1 about if port got him their lineup would be Carey Laid Stevens

Whist it's mean it it still verry funny

Ironic isn't it?

 

[hotpie]

Mick Martyn.

Hes still on an AFL list

WHAT A JOKE!!!!

BWAAAHAHAHAHAHA

 

[maccas_no1]

Yeah Mick has had his time and sucess time to let it go I thinkHes not a joke just past his prime!!!!When its time to go its time to go

 

[Damp Squarie]

What's the difference between Carlton and a pyro-maniac?

A pyro-maniac wouldn't waste 20 matches.

 

[Damp Squarie]

On a tour of South Australia, the Pope took a couple of days off his
> Itinerary to visit the wild west coast near Smoky Bay on an impromptu
> sightseeing trip.
>
> His 4X4 Pope mobile was driving along the golden sands when there was an
> enormous commotion heard just off the headland. They rushed to see what
> it was and upon approaching the scene the Pope noticed just outside the
> surf, a hapless man wearing a Teal, White and Black football jersey,
> struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a twenty foot
> shark.
>
> At that moment a speedboat containing three men wearing Crows tops roared
> into view from around the point. Spontaneously, one of the men took aim
> and fired a harpoon into the shark's ribs, immobilising it instantly. The
> other two reached out and pulled the bloke from the sea
> and then, using long clubs, beat the shark to death.
>
> They bundled the bleeding, semi conscious man into the speed boat along
> with the dead shark and then prepared for a hasty retreat, when they
> heard frantic shouting from the shore. It was of course the Pope, and he
> summoned them to the beach.
>
> Upon them reaching the shore the Pope went into raptures about the rescue
> and said, "I give you my blessing for your brave actions. I had heard
> that there were some racist xenophobic people trying to divide Australia
> but, now I have seen with my own eyes this is not true.
> I can see that your society is a truly enlightened example of tribal
> harmony and could serve as a model on which other nations could follow."
>
> He blessed them all and drove off in a cloud of dust.
>
> As he departed, the harpoonist asked the others, "Who was that???!"
>
> "That," one answered, "was his Holiness the Pope. He is in direct contact
> with God and has access to all God's wisdom."
>
> "Well,"the harpoonist replied, "he knows f*#k all about shark hunting.
> How's that bait holding up or do we need to get another one?"

 

[blackdiamond]

Topjars, thanks for bringing some relevance back to the thread.

 

[maccas_no1]

Ohh Scott cant you take a joke mate??????There,there it will be alright,just start supporting a 'real' team and you wont be the butt of everyones jokePort Power Is A Joke One minor premiership and back to back preseason toilet bowls in the trophy cabinetLOL not bad goingLOSERS

 

[blackdiamond]

maccas_no1, your post wasn't even a joke so how you expect me to find it funny is beyond me.

Adelaide hasn't beaten Port since the 23rd of April 2000 which is exactly 1022 days ago, if anything your so called 'real' team is the joke.

Feel free to leave your Football related jokes here and if you want to discuss my above statment a little further please feel free to come to the Port Adelaide Board as I am sure I and a few others would like to have a piece of you.

In the mean time happy trolling!

 

[goal_umpire]

What has an IQ of 180?

180 polaxed collingwood supporters carrying handbags

 

[maccas_no1]

Lets face facts Scott, The Adelaide Footy Club have back to back Premiership Cups sitting in our trophy cabinet,you won the minor premiership last season and it was your best chance to win the flag but your 'team' blew it when it comes to finals Pt Adelaide are chokers,your 'team' didnt get any further than the AFC yet your 'team' had two home games as well lets get reall Wizard Cups mean nothing who remembers or cares about that ****,you could win 5000 Wizard Cups in a row big deal Premierships count we have two and they are Back To Back and Im sorry to say but my money is on the AFC winning another one before your mob of soft ****sPORT POWER ARE A JOKE

 

[Winmar]

Well the Crows have six years on Port in the AFL. If you want to talk premierships, go have a look in the trophy cabinets of Collingwood, Essendon or Carlton.

 

[CharlieG]

What has 141 legs and only 3 teeth?
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The front row of the Collingwood Cheer Squad.