Lame Jokes Part 2

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Lady Godava

Anglo-Saxon Gentlewoman
May 20, 2001
34,815
37,381
Beetaloo
AFL Club
Adelaide
Other Teams
Ferocious Fighting Furies
I asked my boss, "Whaddya want me to do with this 6 metre roll of bubble wrap..?"He replied, "Just pop it over there, in the corner..."
Four hours later and I'm still at it...😝
 

Andrewy

Premiership Player
Apr 1, 2011
4,593
9,241
AFL Club
Collingwood
My wife is so negative. I remembered the car seat, the stroller, AND the diaper bag. Yet all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.
 

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Andrewy

Premiership Player
Apr 1, 2011
4,593
9,241
AFL Club
Collingwood
I've been bored recently so I've decided to take up fencing.


The neighbors said they will call the police unless I put it back.
 

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STFU Donnie

Premiership Player
Jul 31, 2012
4,611
7,452
AFL Club
Hawthorn
Other Teams
Everton
As told by Junior Soprano:

A guy comes home with a bouquet of flowers for his wife.

"I guess I'll have to spread my legs now.", she says.

"Why?", he asks, "don't you have a vase?".
 

Billy ray

Brownlow Medallist
Nov 10, 2013
14,887
22,159
The Valley near the Alley
AFL Club
Gold Coast
Other Teams
Hell no
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said 'You've been promoted.' And I swerved.

And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again.' And I swerved again.

He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree.

And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I said 'I careered off the road.'
 

RedmanWasHere

Rarely in kitchens at parties.
Aug 23, 2010
17,926
14,944
Information Superhighway
AFL Club
Essendon
Other Teams
Exers, Gryffindor, Richmond AFLW
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said 'You've been promoted.' And I swerved.

And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again.' And I swerved again.

He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree.

And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I said 'I careered off the road.'
Thank you Tim.
 

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