Craze
Premiership Player
- Aug 7, 2013
- 3,513
- 7,925
- AFL Club
- Richmond
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- Steelers
First launched in 1935, Coon Cheese is an Australian trademark for a cheddar cheese, produced in the Warrnambool Cheese and Butter Factory. Coon is named after its American creator, Edward William Coon (1871-1934) of Philadelphia. Today it can be announced that this clearly racist product name is to be re-branded. This represents another positive step towards a less offensive and more progressive new world.
The AFL met yesterday with a number of senior players from the Brisbane Lions premiership team of 2002, a team widely tipped as the greatest to ever take the field.
Insiders believe the AFL was concerned that several surnames contained in the Lions Premiership team may create unwanted attention from the Black Lives Matter community. And, that the Brisbane Lions could be stripped of their 2002 premiership unless swift changes were made. A BLM spokesperson contacted news outlets yesterday warning of 'severe retaliation' against MCG statues of Brownlow Medalist Haydn Bunton (who played in 119 games for Fitzroy in the 1930's and 1940's), and Leigh Matthews (AFL Legend who coached the Lions to their 3-peat in 2001/02/03).
At midday today our cameras spotted past players Simon Black, Jonathan Brown, Alistair Lynch, Darryl White and Luke Power leaving the Births, Deaths and Marriages Offices in Brisbane.
Pressed for comment, an AFL spokesperson could not rule out further developments in this area. "We need to be proactive and right past wrongs. I can announce that we are establishing the Official Universal Tribunal of Race and Gender Equality (OUTRAGE), to be co-chaired by Adam Goodes and Moama Hope. Normally these types of boards are populated exclusively by white man. Well OUTRAGE is unashamedly diverse in its membership, with Adam (Goodes), Nicky (Winmar) and Heritier (Lumumba) already on board".
And it is understood that OUTRAGE is to be given far-reaching authority to suspend players for hate speech, for refusing to change inappropriate surnames, and possess new executive powers to elevate (and demote) past and current players into (and out of) the AFL Hall of Fame. 300-game veteran John 'Sammy' Newman, a Geelong Team of the Century member, All-Australian and 8-time Victorian State player, inducted into the Hall of Fame in 2002, is almost certain to lose his position.
The AFL met yesterday with a number of senior players from the Brisbane Lions premiership team of 2002, a team widely tipped as the greatest to ever take the field.
Insiders believe the AFL was concerned that several surnames contained in the Lions Premiership team may create unwanted attention from the Black Lives Matter community. And, that the Brisbane Lions could be stripped of their 2002 premiership unless swift changes were made. A BLM spokesperson contacted news outlets yesterday warning of 'severe retaliation' against MCG statues of Brownlow Medalist Haydn Bunton (who played in 119 games for Fitzroy in the 1930's and 1940's), and Leigh Matthews (AFL Legend who coached the Lions to their 3-peat in 2001/02/03).
At midday today our cameras spotted past players Simon Black, Jonathan Brown, Alistair Lynch, Darryl White and Luke Power leaving the Births, Deaths and Marriages Offices in Brisbane.
Pressed for comment, an AFL spokesperson could not rule out further developments in this area. "We need to be proactive and right past wrongs. I can announce that we are establishing the Official Universal Tribunal of Race and Gender Equality (OUTRAGE), to be co-chaired by Adam Goodes and Moama Hope. Normally these types of boards are populated exclusively by white man. Well OUTRAGE is unashamedly diverse in its membership, with Adam (Goodes), Nicky (Winmar) and Heritier (Lumumba) already on board".
And it is understood that OUTRAGE is to be given far-reaching authority to suspend players for hate speech, for refusing to change inappropriate surnames, and possess new executive powers to elevate (and demote) past and current players into (and out of) the AFL Hall of Fame. 300-game veteran John 'Sammy' Newman, a Geelong Team of the Century member, All-Australian and 8-time Victorian State player, inducted into the Hall of Fame in 2002, is almost certain to lose his position.
