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Certified Legendary Thread Pearlers Only

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deled3 said:
Franz and Herman were walking along the main street of town. Franz was a small man with a large moustache whilst Herman was a big man, big hands and long legs. They were best friends and occasionally they would kiss.

Franz and Herman continued to walk along the street and they entered a hardware shop. Franz looked at Herman who was looking at the tools. Franz mouthed at Herman 'f*ck you' and when Herman turned around Franz pretended to be clapping his hands. They always did f*cked up s**t like this.

They often ate each others s**t and ****ed each other too.
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This is fantastic.
 
deled3 said:
Oliver always ran home from school. He was an excited boy to see his mum and his dog William. Oliver ran so hard that he would s**t his pants a little bit and mum would have to clean it up.

When Oliver and William played together in the backyard that would have a great time. Oliver taught William to fetch and drop. 'Let's play a prank on mum,' whispered Oliver into William's ear. William was a very excited dog!

Mum walked into the kitchen and found Oliver naked sitting at the kitchen table. William was up on the kitchen table squatting; with his arse inches above Oliver's open mouth, shitting on him. It was apparent that Oliver had shat on the floor near his seat. He had also sticky taped his little dick to his stomach.
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Cannot stop laughing at this
 

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Goodbye Barry, Dame Edna, Les and Sandy. Shocking that they should all pass on the same day. I haven't felt this sad since Bob Denver, Gilligan and Maynard G. Krebs also all passed away on the same day. Thanks Barry, for many years of enjoyment and laughter. Goodbye to an incredible genius.
 
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Genius.

Back when it was worth watching I saw him on Q and A along with I think David Marr and a few others. It was great to see real intellects, who had the confidence to discuss things with people they disagreed with. (As opposed to the fragile cheerleaders the show gets now)

It was so funny and so clever at the same time, great television if you can track it down
 
kickazz said:
Genius.

Back when it was worth watching I saw him on Q and A along with I think David Marr and a few others. It was great to see real intellects, who had the confidence to discuss things with people they disagreed with. (As opposed to the fragile cheerleaders the show gets now)

It was so funny and so clever at the same time, great television if you can track it down
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Of course, the minute he gave an opinion on Transgender, he was blacklisted by the ABC
 

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GoEaglesGoSGIO said:
So many people calling him a genius spent the last 3 years abusing and hating on him

Shallow and souless individuals
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So many times in this football forum, you'll get into a discussion with someone, be on either end of the argument and just say "agree to disagree on this one" and you just move on. Just think a whole bunch of people could learn from this forum
 
A woman said to her friend ..."My Gynecologist recognised me at the shops the other day'.

The friend said 'You'll have to start wearing longer skirts!'
 
My mother-in-law, started taking flying lessons a many years ago and she got her license sometime later.
The other day, as you may have seen on the news she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting.
She was forced to make an emergency landing in Geelong because of bad weather and crashed.
The absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured.
I have put in the photograph that was taken at the scene. It shows the extent of damage to her aircraft. She was very, very lucky.
plane crash.png
 

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A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized She was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his:

Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out. "Business trip or pleasure?"

She turned, smiled and said. "Business. I’m going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston."

He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen Sitting next to him and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs!

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked. “What’s your Business at this convention?"

“Lecturer." She responded. "I use information that I have learned from my Personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."

“Really?” He said. “And what kind of myths are there?”

“Well.” She explained. “One popular myth is that African-American men are The most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is That Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Mexican Descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with Absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck."

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed.. "I’m Sorry." She said, “I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don’t even know your name."

"Tonto." The man said. "Tonto Gonzales, but my friends call me Bubba."
 
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
 

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