Games & Recreation Post a joke

[gareth36]

I'm trying to remember which season comes before summer.

Unfortunately nothing springs to mind.

 

[Quadzilla]

My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.

 

[Wallaby]

My girlfriend's a pr0n star. Gee, she was mad when she found out.

 

[savagelunchbox]

I'm trying to remember which season comes before summer.

Unfortunately nothing springs to mind.

My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.

My girlfriend's a pr0n star. Gee, she was mad when she found out.

These r one liners and not jokes....

 

[emuboy]

Did you hear about the irresponsible bogans?

They allow their 14-year old daughter to smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.


What do you usually hear just before a bogan dies?

"Hey - watch this!"


What's bright green, wears a black tee-shirt, jeans and drives an old Torana?

Kermit the Bog

 

[Quadzilla]

The level of pollution in the world today is becoming intolerable. Only the other day i opened a can of sardines to find it was full of oil and all the fish were dead.

 

[LANGFORDandSON]

A guy gets home from work 1/2 hour before the footy starts, sits on the couch, switches the tv on and shouts to his missus "Hey, get us one before it starts", she brings him a beer.

10 minutes later he shouts "get us another one before it starts", once again, she dutifully brings him a cold beer.

Another 10 minutes pass, he yells out "get us one more before it starts" to which she replies "get your own f*cking beer you lazy pr!ck".

He then says in a defeated voice, "Oh great, it's started".

 

[Wallaby]

Werner Heisenberg was pulled over for speeding. Cop says, 'Do you know how fast you were going?' Heisenberg says, 'No, but I knew exactly where I was.'

Heisenberg and Schroedinger were in a car when there was a sudden thump. Schroedinger shouted 'You just ran over my cat! Do you think it's dead?'.
Heisenberg replied 'I can't be certain.........'.

 

[Quadzilla]

An Irish policeman arrested a criminal and was just about to put on the handcuffs when his hat blew off down the road. The criminal said, "Shall i go and fetch it for you?" "Do you think i'm stupid?" said the policeman. "You wait here and i'll go and get it."