Quick Joke

[dA Crow]

Just a quickie from this morning emails, hope you get a smirk from it.

50,000 Power fans meet at Alberton Oval for a "Power Fans are not stupid" convention.

Mark Williams says, we are all here today to prove to the world that Power supporters are not stupid. Can i have a volunteer?

Byron Pickett gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage.

Mark asks him "what is fifteen plus fifteen?", After 15 or 20 seconds, Byron says "eighteen!"

Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then all 50,000 Power fans start chanting "GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!! GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!!

Marks says "well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 50,000 of you in one place and we have the worldwide press and global broadcast media here, i think we can give him another chance". So he asks "what is seven plus seven?"

After nearly 30 seconds, Byron eventually says "ninety!". Mark is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh. Everyone is disheartened.

Byron starts crying, and the 50,000 Power fans begin to yell and wave their hands shouting "GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!! GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!!

Mark unsure whether or not he is doing more harm than good, eventually says OK! Just one more chance.............What's two plus two?"

Byron closes his eyes, and after a full minute expires, says "four!"

Throughout Alberton pandemonium breaks out.

All 50,000 Power fans jump to their feet, wave their arms, stamp their feet and scream........................................

GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!! GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!!

 

[Smoooothy]

Thats freaky, i got that exact email this morning too!!!

Must be doing the rounds..

Pretty good anyway, i gotta chuckle out of it..

 

[jmorg1]

Port Power do not have 50,000 fans.

Or was that a sub-joke within the main joke?

 

[dA Crow]

Port Power do not have 50,000 fans.

Or was that a sub-joke within the main joke?

Maybe Bryon counted them

 

[jmorg1]

I think you forgot the last part of the joke.

Byron then said, 'Ah bugger this. Just gimme a sixpack and my car keys willya?'

 

[AlwaysCrows]

I think you forgot the last part of the joke.

Byron then said, 'Ah bugger this. Just gimme a sixpack and my car keys willya?'

 

[portentous]

Mark asks him "what is fifteen plus fifteen?", After 15 or 20 seconds, Byron says "eighteen!"

So he asks "what is seven plus seven?"

After nearly 30 seconds, Byron eventually says "ninety!". Mark is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh. Everyone is disheartened.

Hey, I'm still waiting for the answers!

 

[Mad Dog]

Q. What does Geraint Jones and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason

 

[Crow-mosone]

Q. What does Geraint Jones and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason

F*ck Geraint jones. in the recent series against Bangladesh he claimed 2 catches that clearly bounced.

sorry, needed to say that.

 

[Smoooothy]

Q. What does Geraint Jones and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason

lol, nice...

 

[missionpossible]

lol

i was just expect you to say port will make the eight in 2005

which they will, only problem is it will be the bottom eight

 

[Damp Squarie]

Byron then said, 'Ah bugger this. Just gimme a sixpack and my car keys willya?'

I thought he was lookin for the whine in the diff

 

[spookism]

I think you forgot the last part of the joke.

Byron then said, 'Ah bugger this. Just gimme a sixpack and my car keys willya?'

Maybe he was going to give the keys to Graham Johncock???

 

[Damp Squarie]

Q. What does Geraint Jones and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason

Q. What do you call an english cricketer with a 100 runs against his name?
A. A bowler

 

[relapse]

shame the joke (the port one) isnt funny

 

[Paralowiepower]

Q. What do you call an english cricketer with a 100 runs against his name?
A. A bowler

Or

Q. What do you call an English cricketer who makes runs?
A. A South African

 

[StickerMan]

Q. Why are KFC and McDonalds stores in London all of a sudden ecstatic?

A. Because there is no subway!

Ladie goes into the Doctor and says 'Doctor, Doctor.... everytime I open my legs the tune 'I've got the Power to win....' comes out of my v@gina'

All of a sudden the doctor interrupts, saying 'It's ok madam, i know a lot of c*nts that sing that....!

 

[AlwaysCrows]

Q. Why are KFC and McDonalds stores in London all of a sudden ecstatic?

A. Because there is no subway!

Ladie goes into the Doctor and says 'Doctor, Doctor.... everytime I open my legs the tune 'I've got the Power to win....' comes out of my v@gina'

All of a sudden the doctor interrupts, saying 'It's ok madam, i know a lot of c*nts that sing that....!

 

[CaptainDangerfield]

Or

Q. What do you call an English cricketer who makes runs?
A. A South African

I was recently in my local pub having a beer and a punt or two. I got talking to a guy of middle eastern origin. I gave him a few tips on the horses that came in much to his delight. Before he left he said he must return the favour and give me some potentially life saving advice.

HASSAN: **Whispers*** - Whatever you do my friend, avoid going anywhere near Paralowie.

SpringChoke: Avoid it why? Is there going to be a terrorist attack there?

HASSAN: ****Whispers****No...Avoid it because it's a sh*thole.

 

[CaptainDangerfield]

Q. Why are KFC and McDonalds stores in London all of a sudden ecstatic?

A. Because there is no subway!

Ladie goes into the Doctor and says 'Doctor, Doctor.... everytime I open my legs the tune 'I've got the Power to win....' comes out of my v@gina'

All of a sudden the doctor interrupts, saying 'It's ok madam, i know a lot of c*nts that sing that....![/QUOTE]


Rough, but funny.

 

[StickerMan]

.....and that's the main thing!

 

[portentous]

I'm deeply offended by this thread.









Not.

 

[macca23]

The Pommie cricket jokes are already out on email as well. With all respects to Noddy et al:

"Q. What does Geraint Jones (wicket keeper) and Michael Jackson have in common?

A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason



Q. What is the height of optimism?

A. An English batsman applying sunscreen.



Q. What does Ashley Giles put in his hands to make sure the next ball almost always takes a wicket?

A. A bat.



Q. What would Glen McGrath be if he was an Englishman?

A. An allrounder.



Q. What advantage do Kevin Pieterson, Andrew Strauss and Geraint Jones have over the rest of their team-mates?

A. At least they can say they're not really English.



Q. What is the English version of a hat-trick?

A. Three runs in three balls.



Q. What do you call an Englishman with 100 runs against his name?

A. A bowler.



Q. What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by English batsmen?

A. The walk back to the pavilion.



Q. Who has the easiest job in the English squad?

A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats.



Q. Why is Andrew Flintoff the unluckiest English player?

A. Because he was born in England.



Q. What does "Ashes" stand for?

A. Another Sad Horrific English Series.



Q. What's the English version of LBW?

A. Lost, Beaten, Walloped.



Q. Who spends the most time on the crease of anyone in the English team?

A. The person who ironed their cricket whites."

 

[portentous]

Hehe *waits for noddy, Rave Slave et al to respond*

 

[Jumbo]

Ladie goes into the Doctor and says 'Doctor, Doctor.... everytime I open my legs the tune 'I've got the Power to win....' comes out of my v@gina'

All of a sudden the doctor interrupts, saying 'It's ok madam, i know a lot of c*nts that sing that....![/QUOTE]
.

I'll pay that
I think I will use an equally crass but slightly varied version when I get to work tonight