Toast The Official Kurt Tippett Celebrity Roast

[Prem87]

Loving this thread!

 

[jenny61_99]

This is a beauty (first tweeted by none other than Phil Davis, who said he thought it was perhaps a bit much!):

 

[dangerzone]

ooooh, can I play?

 

[adelcrows]

Hands up who is on $1 million a season

Get away from me poor person

Phil look! MONEZZ!!!

Dafaq is this?

And we have a winner, i literally laughed at this post.. Gold...

 

[SydCrow]

 

[adelcrows]

Ohhh really, they won't talk to me anymore if I text them all??

Ohhh, do I have to tell them face to face

Oh No, here we go again, Another Concussion...

 

[adelcrows]

I'm a bit bored and can't match Pyro Crow in the first ones.. There are just too many pictures that could have hilarious lines added to them, (Not saying mine are )

Nobody will talk to us, even Harry Taylor is giving me dirty looks, what do you reckon we did?

Oh No...Decisions, Decisions, Decisions... If I mark this, I am in the goalsquare, I don't reckon I can kick it, what do I do...

 

[ClashGurnseyRage]

 

[headache1]

So, how much did you want next year Kurt?

Well...

...

...

...

LOL!!!

 

[AusTerran]

Tippett: Hi guys! Guess what, I'm leaving you all for more $$$! Friend4life... What the.... Let me go... Help!

 

[AusTerran]

Walker: Hey mate, remember my joke about burning down your house if you leave...

Walker: Hey Tippo! Look! Vince: Quick! Run!

Tippett's new Sydney home

Tippett: Nooooo..!

 

[fabs33]

My turn.

 

[Schulzycrow]

But we had a gentleman's agreement...Peter tell them...we shook hands on it...what's that? Sheedy's on the phone?

Derp.

 

[Schulzycrow]

Tippett after his first game against the Crows 2013....

 

[jenny61_99]

Tippett after his first game against the Crows 2013....

Too far maybe?

 

[Geoffa32]

Kurt is not greedy, he just misses his home town.








And will miss it for another four years.....while he cleans out the Swans cap space.

 

[andrew99]

IMO, you guys should play hardball. As a follower of a team with premiership aspirations next year, I'd be disappointed if Sydney strengthen their list without losing anything in return. Make Sydney pay! None of this White +22 bs.

 

[fabs33]

Kurt is not greedy, he just misses his home town.

And will miss it for another four years.....while he cleans out the Swans cap space.

Eureka! Now it all makes sense.

Kurt's difficult decision.

 

[jenny61_99]

Hi, My name's Kurt Tippett

I used to play basketball.

Then I tried weightlifting, but I couldn't do that without someone helping.

I dabbled at ten pin bowling...

And even tried radio as a shock jock.

Perhaps a celebrity chef was my calling?

But I pretty much sucked at everything.

I tried to play footy...

But those Adelaide people are mean and nasty!

Sometimes they make me lie down and cry!

Perhaps I should go home and sit on the water, I'm pretty good at that.

But those Sydney boys are SO nice, they seem to like me. We go star gazing. AND they want to throw a truck load of money at me!

I think I'll go there instead!

 

[Schulzycrow]

Too far maybe?

Maybe... Just thinking he might get some special attention from "his friends forever" hard spoils that's all.

 

[Huntercrow]

Hey Jesse See that plane up there? Its headin to your new hometown!
So I'll just rip that guernsey off! You'd be a XXXL???

 

[Jarmayhem]

The clause in Kurt's contract finally revealed:

Section 34.3a
Kurt should be louder, angrier and have access to a time machine. When Kurt's not around, the other players should ask: "Where's Kurt?"

 

[Allefgib]

$kurt Tippett - now earning extra $$$ on the side at Kid's parties!

 

[SydCrow]

$kurt Tippett - now earning extra $$$ on the side at Kid's parties!

I assume the pinata is full of cash and airline tickets to the Gold Coast Sydney?

 

[Walker Texas Danger]

When going Home means you end up being "Home" Alone (in Sydney)