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RU_ said:
Just opened with

Roses are red,
Pills are great,
I just double dropped,
Let's go on a date?

Better than the usual hey there, how are you?
Click to expand...

Picking your targets with that effort
 
If she thinks that, why match in the first place? :confused:
 

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you should have said "I'm more like donkey, at least in the pelvic region ; )" and she would have been THAT bloody wet for u mate fuaark u'd be elbow deep in that gushy-gushy right now.

Lol Jkz shes a horrible farm animal. on 2 the next 1.
 

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You: do you like walking thru the park

Her: sure

You: I like bush walking, but I always end up tripping over something. You ever tripped over a rock or a shrub

Her: lol, yes

You: how about a root ?
 

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Cruyff14 said:
Rough_Edges
Click to expand...

ah yep, it's not that[/] exciting

Match bird
Prob 7.2/10
Brown hair, bout 160 cm, 55kg, face not bad,
not bad, bio indicates she enjoys tv series' and avocado
Side note - if I've u know anything about girls, they love avocado and TV series'
after around 3 days she starts talking to me
makes unfunny comment about my moustache
"I moustache you a question" something like that
Basically right her off but I give her w chance
Tell her it was lame and she needs to improve her one liners
she takes it well
start chatting
probably for two weeks or so through the app everyday, we like similar music, we both hate people
ask her for snapchat
she stops talking for a few days, odd I think, bloody girls
few days later comes up with some shit excuse, least she has the decency to come up with a lie I suppose
again we chat for a few more days
General chit chat shit, how was work etc
She says she works at a clothes shop in the city
I think **** this, actually starting to dig this bird
I reckon she can tell, perhaps coming across as too keen as keeps throwing off my advances for meeting up, probably for 2 or 3 weeks she cancels last minute and reschedules
Then finally night comes
Plan to meet at howler on Sunday afternoon for a beer and pork bao (we've spoken about this before, they've got rid of it since, campaigners)
the nervousness before meeting up with someone on tinder is extreme, for me at least, I'm not bad at faking outgoingness but the build up on this one has been high and I've actively pursued - really digging her
Rock up on time, she lives in Brunswick she says so she says we'll just meet there
wait ten minutes
hmmmm I think I've been stood up, got her number and text her - are you coming lol? If not ok just don't want to sit here like a dickhead for twenty minutes waiting for you if you're not
she texts back after an excruciating 7 minutes
"I'm so ****ing sorry I'm sitting in my car outside but I can't come in"
why I say
Anyway I naturally walk outside and after a while of texting (won't answer calls) I'm naturally a bit worried, says she's crying
after about fifteen minutes she tells me where she's parked
Like 3 minute walk up the road
walk up road, little bit hesitantly, is this set up? am I about to get butt rape
she says she's driving a small red Toyota
I start walking
look up road and standing about 50m is s small red Toyota, then she gets out just she is hysterically crying, unbelievably big, blonde haired, bitch wearing skinny blue pale jeans and one of those things homer wore in the Simpsons when he was huge
I kind of froze
Wtf is this I think
felt like forever I was standing there
then I realised, I've been ****ing catfished
Feelings of anger, shame? (Why) and upsettness Rush me.
fight or flight kicks in. I choose flight. Turn around, get in my car, drive to nearest kfc (guess she did same), and go home.
phone constantly going off
read texts "you wanted to know me when you thought I looked different" blah blah blah
was actually really embarrassed about falling for it but then realised **** how was I to know
never did write back
tried to track down girl who's picture she was using as I was now furious
never did
She ended up unmatching me
quite an experience

-------


Gibbsy
 

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Rough_Edges said:
ah yep, it's not that[/] exciting

Match bird
Prob 7.2/10
Brown hair, bout 160 cm, 55kg, face not bad,
not bad, bio indicates she enjoys tv series' and avocado
Side note - if I've u know anything about girls, they love avocado and TV series'
after around 3 days she starts talking to me
makes unfunny comment about my moustache
"I moustache you a question" something like that
Basically right her off but I give her w chance
Tell her it was lame and she needs to improve her one liners
she takes it well
start chatting
probably for two weeks or so through the app everyday, we like similar music, we both hate people
ask her for snapchat
she stops talking for a few days, odd I think, bloody girls
few days later comes up with some shit excuse, least she has the decency to come up with a lie I suppose
again we chat for a few more days
General chit chat shit, how was work etc
She says she works at a clothes shop in the city
I think **** this, actually starting to dig this bird
I reckon she can tell, perhaps coming across as too keen as keeps throwing off my advances for meeting up, probably for 2 or 3 weeks she cancels last minute and reschedules
Then finally night comes
Plan to meet at howler on Sunday afternoon for a beer and pork bao (we've spoken about this before, they've got rid of it since, campaigners)
the nervousness before meeting up with someone on tinder is extreme, for me at least, I'm not bad at faking outgoingness but the build up on this one has been high and I've actively pursued - really digging her
Rock up on time, she lives in Brunswick she says so she says we'll just meet there
wait ten minutes
hmmmm I think I've been stood up, got her number and text her - are you coming lol? If not ok just don't want to sit here like a dickhead for twenty minutes waiting for you if you're not
she texts back after an excruciating 7 minutes
"I'm so ******* sorry I'm sitting in my car outside but I can't come in"
why I say
Anyway I naturally walk outside and after a while of texting (won't answer calls) I'm naturally a bit worried, says she's crying
after about fifteen minutes she tells me where she's parked
Like 3 minute walk up the road
walk up road, little bit hesitantly, is this set up? am I about to get butt rape
she says she's driving a small red Toyota
I start walking
look up road and standing about 50m is s small red Toyota, then she gets out just she is hysterically crying, unbelievably big, blonde haired, bitch wearing skinny blue pale jeans and one of those things homer wore in the Simpsons when he was huge
I kind of froze
Wtf is this I think
felt like forever I was standing there
then I realised, I've been ******* catfished
Feelings of anger, shame? (Why) and upsettness Rush me.
fight or flight kicks in. I choose flight. Turn around, get in my car, drive to nearest kfc (guess she did same), and go home.
phone constantly going off
read texts "you wanted to know me when you thought I looked different" blah blah blah
was actually really embarrassed about falling for it but then realised **** how was I to know
never did write back
tried to track down girl who's picture she was using as I was now furious
never did
She ended up unmatching me
quite an experience

-------


Gibbsy
Click to expand...

****... I sorta covered my eyes when I got up to the false identity part. That's stiff. So this is Ramona hey?
 
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