DapperJong
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Pantskyle
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- Feb 11, 2015
- 42,844
- 82,919
- AFL Club
- Essendon
- Other Teams
- Juventus
So, you really hate Essendon huh? Don't blame you.
You hate them so much that you just wanna troll the shit out of them at any opportunity? Fair enough.
But do you ever find yourself, filled with that red and black rage brimming from your brain, cursor hovering over that "create thread" button, but your stupid self can only think of half arsed ideas that don't even make any sense?
Lol drugendon haven't won any games if you don't count the games that they won lololo
I'm here to bring you all of the new and exciting things we can troll Essendon about, and I'll also be revisiting some classics which will never die. Kinda like your "Break Glass In Case You Are Just Not Funny" type stuff.
Let's start with some current issues.
Dyson Heppell Looks like a hobo and is a terrible captain.
Looks like he also can't afford a fleshlight.
Congrats to Geelong Dynasty for already taking advantage of this. Great work.
Now, if you're an Essendon player and you see this shit before your season even starts, you know it's gonna be a long year. This muppet couldn't inspire an obese bastard like Packedlunch to go to town on a pack of donuts, let alone inspire an AFL standard athlete to at least try to win a football game. Let's not even talk about the tough stuff like standing up in a tackle of winning a centre clearance.
He may the the biggest reason Essendon are playing so bad.
Essendon's self hype machine is ****ing busted.
Yeah so the club tricked all it's supporters that it was gonna finish top 4 this year.
Look at this shit:
http://www.essendonfc.com.au/video/2018-02-24/we-are-going-to-fly-up
How have none of you torn this crap to pieces yet?
WHO IS THIS DICKHEAD
There's plenty here to explore. Every time our social media department do something, there's a collective groan. Don't sleep on this.
We traded TWO first rounders for Jake Stringer.
Pictured next to Capt. Vinnie Bin to soften the effect of the putridness occuring.
I'm ****ing astounded that the ****ing main board has been way ahead of the bay on this one. Even Mofra is going to the main board to tell everyone about it.
And what did we tell everyone? that EFC had such a good culture that Stringer would instantly revert to his 2015 form and all of his mental problems would be eradicated.
Well guess what? He's still shit, is now ****ing fat, still blows all of his coin at the TAB and is probably still a pedo.
Great work Bombers.
I love Smith and Saad tho good work dodo i love you
Joe Daniher is ugly and shit.
He has kicked it OOF more times than any other score this year. Seriously this is easy folks. He's the next ****ing Buddy in case you didn't know.
We love him so much so any troll directed at him will hurt our feelings. Give it a go.
-----------
That's 3 easy ones for you. If you dig past the monotony that is your own brain, I promise you will find a lot more. Oh yeah, we lost to the ****ing Bulldogs last week who are dog shit. There's another one.
But I just cannot stress enough that there are certain things that should never be put down. And lately, I haven't seen them around here. They rustle me the **** up and I have to just sit there and say "yep, that stings. We are ****ing stupid."
You all know what I'm talking about.
The Saga.
It is never going to run out of legs people. No other team will ever stoop to the stupidness born from arrogance that we did. And I still love Hird and occasionally argue our innocence. Yep, that's how head****ed us Bombers supporters can be.
Thanks you tanned dickheads.
It's like a good meal. I love burgers. A good burger is almost my favourite thing to eat. But am I just gonna eat one and be satisfied for the rest of my life? **** no.
Here's some reminders about things that happened during that period, that still upsets Bombers fans.
- We put Dean Wallis in charge of something
- The only bit of success we actually gained from using PEDs was Jobe's brownlow which he had to give back.
- We chose to use a banned drug that doesn't actually do anything.
- We were stupid enough to get caught unlike Geelong and Hawthorn
- We won the spoon and celebrated our two wins like we were back in 1984/5.
- We made finals next year to convince ourselves that we were only bad because we were missing players
- it has lumped us in with the absolute shittrucks of the competition that are probably never destined to have any measure of success any more (North, Bulldogs, Saints) all because we can't win a ****ing final
There's many many many many more that you all know and love so why not use them????
This thread would have had a lot more tips in it if I wasn't at work but I have no doubt this will help al lot of our struggling posters.
Oh yeah, I just remembered, we employ Josh Green AND he is currently our best forward.
I look forward to all the upcoming Bomber threads and will be judging them very closely.
Happy thread creating, flogs.
You hate them so much that you just wanna troll the shit out of them at any opportunity? Fair enough.
But do you ever find yourself, filled with that red and black rage brimming from your brain, cursor hovering over that "create thread" button, but your stupid self can only think of half arsed ideas that don't even make any sense?
Lol drugendon haven't won any games if you don't count the games that they won lololo
WAIT:
READ THIS BEFORE CREATING ANOTHER THREAD THAT REVEALS HOW STUPID YOU REALLY ARE, AND THAT YOUR LAST SUCCESSFUL THREAD WAS JUST LUCK.
READ THIS BEFORE CREATING ANOTHER THREAD THAT REVEALS HOW STUPID YOU REALLY ARE, AND THAT YOUR LAST SUCCESSFUL THREAD WAS JUST LUCK.
I'm here to bring you all of the new and exciting things we can troll Essendon about, and I'll also be revisiting some classics which will never die. Kinda like your "Break Glass In Case You Are Just Not Funny" type stuff.
Let's start with some current issues.
Dyson Heppell Looks like a hobo and is a terrible captain.
Looks like he also can't afford a fleshlight.
Congrats to Geelong Dynasty for already taking advantage of this. Great work.
Now, if you're an Essendon player and you see this shit before your season even starts, you know it's gonna be a long year. This muppet couldn't inspire an obese bastard like Packedlunch to go to town on a pack of donuts, let alone inspire an AFL standard athlete to at least try to win a football game. Let's not even talk about the tough stuff like standing up in a tackle of winning a centre clearance.
He may the the biggest reason Essendon are playing so bad.
Essendon's self hype machine is ****ing busted.
Yeah so the club tricked all it's supporters that it was gonna finish top 4 this year.
Look at this shit:
http://www.essendonfc.com.au/video/2018-02-24/we-are-going-to-fly-up
How have none of you torn this crap to pieces yet?
WHO IS THIS DICKHEAD
There's plenty here to explore. Every time our social media department do something, there's a collective groan. Don't sleep on this.
We traded TWO first rounders for Jake Stringer.
Pictured next to Capt. Vinnie Bin to soften the effect of the putridness occuring.
I'm ****ing astounded that the ****ing main board has been way ahead of the bay on this one. Even Mofra is going to the main board to tell everyone about it.
And what did we tell everyone? that EFC had such a good culture that Stringer would instantly revert to his 2015 form and all of his mental problems would be eradicated.
Well guess what? He's still shit, is now ****ing fat, still blows all of his coin at the TAB and is probably still a pedo.
Great work Bombers.
I love Smith and Saad tho good work dodo i love you
Joe Daniher is ugly and shit.
He has kicked it OOF more times than any other score this year. Seriously this is easy folks. He's the next ****ing Buddy in case you didn't know.
We love him so much so any troll directed at him will hurt our feelings. Give it a go.
-----------
That's 3 easy ones for you. If you dig past the monotony that is your own brain, I promise you will find a lot more. Oh yeah, we lost to the ****ing Bulldogs last week who are dog shit. There's another one.
But I just cannot stress enough that there are certain things that should never be put down. And lately, I haven't seen them around here. They rustle me the **** up and I have to just sit there and say "yep, that stings. We are ****ing stupid."
You all know what I'm talking about.
The Saga.
It is never going to run out of legs people. No other team will ever stoop to the stupidness born from arrogance that we did. And I still love Hird and occasionally argue our innocence. Yep, that's how head****ed us Bombers supporters can be.
Thanks you tanned dickheads.
It's like a good meal. I love burgers. A good burger is almost my favourite thing to eat. But am I just gonna eat one and be satisfied for the rest of my life? **** no.
Here's some reminders about things that happened during that period, that still upsets Bombers fans.
- We put Dean Wallis in charge of something
- The only bit of success we actually gained from using PEDs was Jobe's brownlow which he had to give back.
- We chose to use a banned drug that doesn't actually do anything.
- We were stupid enough to get caught unlike Geelong and Hawthorn
- We won the spoon and celebrated our two wins like we were back in 1984/5.
- We made finals next year to convince ourselves that we were only bad because we were missing players
- it has lumped us in with the absolute shittrucks of the competition that are probably never destined to have any measure of success any more (North, Bulldogs, Saints) all because we can't win a ****ing final
There's many many many many more that you all know and love so why not use them????
This thread would have had a lot more tips in it if I wasn't at work but I have no doubt this will help al lot of our struggling posters.
Oh yeah, I just remembered, we employ Josh Green AND he is currently our best forward.
I look forward to all the upcoming Bomber threads and will be judging them very closely.
Happy thread creating, flogs.
Keep fighting the good fight, buddy.
