Media Captain Conversations with haydo of the Wonders [ALL NEW]

[dogs105]

 

[Matty411]

View attachment 467282

(Just joking, I just wanted to use this gif. Obviously an anteater and a subtle gif-related attempt at showing superiority by inferring you eat poor captain Ant Bear but for some reason is drinking milk. Also quite cute. Carry on)

 

[mike123]

Give me your pitch. Why should it be one?

Becuase being related to me is a gift.

 

[Matty411]

Gee, god complex much?

Upon reflection.... anyone else kinda freaked out by this gif... even just a little? Has a bit of an Adams Family vibe to it.

 

[GotTheGoodes]

Gee, god complex much?

Upon reflection.... anyone else kinda freaked out by this gif... even just a little? Has a bit of an Adams Family vibe to it.

Someone's in her box...

 

[philreich]

Before any of you ask, yes the other bears in the above gif are fellow Swamprat posters Quadzilla and philreich with ant555 in orange and GotTheGoodes to the far right.

Sums up my dancing to a tee. It's been said that it's hard to bear - this kinda proves it.

 

[Matty411]

Captain Conversations with Kohphi - Captain of the Baghdad Bombers

After heading around the league, I thought it time to look back in my own backyard at Abdu Prison to have a chat with the Captain on board and best ruck in the league - KohPhi. And what an explosive chat it was!

M411: Not that you really need any introduction mate, but how’re you feeling?

Koh: I'm feeling good mate. Just come off a hard fought win against quality opposition in the Wonders, my twenty three 7/11 convenience stores in Baghdad and Mosul are going great guns (I mean that literally, I'm shifting a shit load of illegal weaponry which behind the watermelon flavoured slurpees, is my biggest profit spinner) and I'm in the final stages of negotiations to take over the management of Baghdad's No.1 boy band, Talking Be-Heads after which I plan to launch them internationally. I'm actually quite proud of this as I helped write their latest single "I must cut off your hand because you stole my heart".

So yeah Matty, being KohPhi is pretty ******* sweet at the moment.

M411: 3 wins on the board for the Bombers now – our best start in years. Do you see this bucking of the trend a positive or dangerous given the last two successful seasons at Abdu and how they’ve panned out (slow starts)?

Koh: It's a tough question to answer, in S.23 we were 2 and 4 and last season we were 1 and 6 and went on to absolutely towel everyone up during a glorious run to win back to back flags.

I am a tad concerned this season as I feel we have scallywags in our ranks, who are undermining our efforts to go the 3peat.

I feel the BC are trying to destabilise our club at any opportunity presented. My sources inform me they have their quivering tentacles embedded nice and deep-like within our playing group. I even heard that The Filth Wizard promised Citroin all the models he could sleep with once his balls drop if he creates mayhem amongst our ranks.
I must bring this up at our next Boys Cl.. umm.. Committee Room catch up.

M411: If you could poach any poster to join our ranks for S26, who would it be and why?

Koh: There are so many great posters in the SFA that I could possibly fill a whole side with who I'd poach. The Filth Wizard, Hate, Ant Bear and a handful of others are all quality and at some stage in my Qootball career, if the planets align, I'd like to call them teammates.
As for next season, it's fair to say recruitment will take on a more "identify and approach" method. The Bombers LG and myself are working diligently behind the scenes to improve our list and we have targeted 3 active posters who at this stage are open to a move. There are also a couple of S.25 rookies I may 'nibble' at. If all else fails, ill scour the Conspiracies and Paranormal Board for some level headed recruits

M411: It must be discussed. Where do you sit on the Harolad situation? Are you happy, sad or nonchalant?

Koh: Definitely sad. Haro was/is a gun poster and I hope he finds his way back into the SFA, not as an alias, as that would diminish his legacy, but as Haro.
Behind the scenes, he was supportive and he genuinely loved his time in the SFA. If he does return, I'm hoping the break gives him a different perspective on the place and he sees the SFA for what it is, just one giant fantasy piss take.

M411: What impact do you believe you’ve had on the culture of the club since stepping up in your first season as Captain.

Koh: When I first started at the Bombers in S.21 it was tough going. Haro, beez and 3 rookies in myself, WFL and dennis crumpet basically carried the show. It was a chore to be honest. I was literally one mouse click away from becoming a Swamprat. I stayed and worked with Haro to try and turn things around.

As Skipper, my first rule is "let's have fun". Now for some, fun may be posting half a dozen times per match thread. For others, fun might be posting triple digits. In my opinion, if both types of posters are having fun then that's great.

I can't speak highly enough of my Bombers teammates who make it easy to jump in and get involved. TonyLynn15 and TheCoach16 are SFA superstars as well as mates of mine. miggs , LicoriceAllsorts , iDon and Shermy all bring their own personality to the match threads and I really enjoy their company on this Board.

This season, nahnah, CALL ME SNAKE and yourself have really become integral parts of our club and our future with this core group of posters is strong. However, I do think the SFA is a constantly evolving beast and clubs can rise and fall within the space of a season. With this in mind, my personal opinion is that a club should have a 'different voice' as skipper regularly so I'll skipper this season and next before passing the reigns to someone else who may have new and different ideas.

M411: Your decision to delist established poster and CHF D2D drew a lot of discussion around the league. Do you see that decision as a turning point for the Bombers?

Koh: I actually see it as a bit of a failure on my part to be honest. D2D is a ripper bloke but just went too hard in a manner that many didn't take to. I tried to support him and offer suggestions on how he could;
a) Be antagonistic and push peoples buttons but
b) Not get banned in the process.

It didn't work and circumstances dictated that the Bombers and D2D needed to part ways.

M411: What's the difference between Kohphi the poster and Kohphi the Qooty player?

Koh: The biggest difference is a q, o, y, l, a, s and another y.

M411: You are cheeky! Now, big picture: from your experience, what’s the single-most defining event in the history of the SFA?

Koh: B2B flags after scraping in to finals; Harogate; Coach to Wonders debacle; the boycott thread… It's been a big couple of seasons. One thing I say to anyone thinking of joining the Bombers is 'it won't be boring'.

M411: Quite obvious I’d say, but pray tell - what is your personal SFA Career Highlight?

Koh: All-SFA, Dual BnF's, B2B Premierships are great from a qooty perspective but it really is everyone I interact with. They make it fun.

M411: Ahh see, you're a softy at heart. Do you have any advice for yours truly as an ambitious rookie making his way?

Koh: Either be yourself or pick a persona and stick with it. I've said it a dozen times but this joint is like a good old Cowboys and Indians flick. It has its heroes and villains, it's antagonists and smooth talkers, it's good guys, arseholes and walk in bit part players who are all vital in keeping this place relevant.

Oh and sexual favours if you want a better position on the ground, that approach seems to have worked for U2tigers and BLERN.

M411: Never change mate. Cheers for the chat and up up the Bombers in S25.

 

[TRUMAN#1]

Sexual Favours. I must be pretty bad at them. I degraded myself only to sit on the pine.

I didn't want to but I may have to swal............ oops sorry that may be a bit to much.

#letmattyfly






Great stuff Matty and Kohphi great stuff.

 

[TRUMAN#1]

I should also add, what I hear BLERN does to get his spot, well he should be ashamed of himself. I heard they call him Bad Boy Bubby at the Warriors.

Something about a lot of 'wrapped in plastic'.

 

[Elton Johns Wig]

Koh: There are so many great posters in the SFA that I could possibly fill a whole side with who I'd poach. The Filth Wizard, Hate, Ant Bear and a handful of others are all quality and at some stage in my Qootball career, if the planets align, I'd like to call them teammates.

Delete your PM, you're dead to me.

 

[Agent93]

Harogate;

Ugh. Please die.

 

[KohPhi]

Ugh. Please die.

 

[Agent93]

View attachment 469185

Do you use office 365 for that?

 

[KohPhi]

Do you use office 365 for that?

Carn Eagles.

 

[Agent93]

Carn Eagles.

Who?

 

[Matty411]

Captain Conversations with Wacky Tiger - Captain of the Fighting Furies

I’m well into the series now – chatting to no less than my fifth captain. After getting my boots dirty at the Underground, I decided to step back out into the fresh air at the Hippodrone and chat with the Captain of the Fighting Furies himself – Wacky Tiger

M411: G’day Wacky, was joining the Furies a coincidence or intentional, learned decision – what with your name fitting so well?

Wacky: Joining the Furies? Well I originally joined with the Demons in the S17 preseason before one of the Furies at the time dragged me across as the Furies were low on numbers. Turned out to be the best decision I could have made. I couldn't imagine playing on a mountain week in week out. Far too cold for me.

M411: What season is this for you in the SFA and when did you realise that you might be captain material?

Wacky: My 9th season it seems. Well I was thrust into Vice-Captaincy relatively early in my career after my debut season. From there it was a pretty quick ascendancy to the top spot at the Furies after a couple of club greats in 3121 premiers and tigland decided it was time to take a backwards step. Can’t thank those two enough, they taught me what the SweetFA is all about and they still go down as two of my favourite SweetFA posters.

M411: I read that your mob got knocked out in S24 to the Bombers in a draw. Is this correct? Walk me through that week and the fallout.

Wacky: Yeah it’s never fun losing a final, especially after getting so close with the draw. What made it worse was we lost to the Bombers in the S23 Grand Final, copped a bit of a spanking actually so we were looking at a bit of redemption. But alas, it wasn’t to be.

M411: The Furies are currently sitting 3rd on 4 wins for the season. If you were to lose again in the Elimination Final, which side would you be least disappointed with in knocking you out

Wacky: The Demons for sure. I mean who in their right mind would ever want to get eliminated from the finals race by their reserves side? It would be like Australia A knocking off Australia all over again in the cricket.

M411: If you could manifest any personality – alive or dead – to draft into the Furies line up that you feel would fit right in, who would it be and why?

Wacky: RodneyDangerfield like the real one. Loves a few beers, loves to have a laugh at the expense of others. He would fit right in at the Furies.

M411: What impact do you believe you’ve had on the culture of your club as captain?

Wacky: Well I suppose you’re be better off asking the lads and ladies that one. I’d like to think we’re a pretty happy go lucky side. We don't seem to take anything too seriously, well most of us don't.

M411: Sticking with club culture, if you had to choose an animal – other than a Tiger – to express what the Furies are striving to be, what it be?

Wacky: Under my leadership, if you were to ask rfctiger74 he would definitely say a Sloth.

M411: What do you rate higher: your posting or Qooty skills?

Wacky: Definitely the Qooty skills

M411: From your experience, what’s the single-most defining event in the history of the SFA?

Wacky: 9.26 minute mark of the Season 20 Grand Final. Here's the link for the kids at home playing along
https://www.bigfooty.com/forum/thre...-buller-demons-okeys-outhouse.1119144/page-28

Smartys Power

On a more serious note whilst that was a defining moment in my involvement I’d probably have to go back to this last off-season and the removal of some truly negative influences on the league. Have to say that early on S25 has felt 'More like the good old days' and I can only hope that that continues.

M411: What is your personal SFA Career Highlight?

Wacky: Season 20 Grand Final without a shadow of a doubt. We came into that game hell bent on righting the wrongs of Season 18 and did so in style. I just so happened to have most probably my best game of Qooty on the day so it absolutely is a favourite of mine.

M411: Any advice for a first-year SFA poster?

Wacky: Don't take anything on here seriously. It’s all for shits and giggles. For those that take it too seriously, this isn't the place for you.

Cheers for the chat and all the best to the Furies in S25.

 

[Agent93]

Matty I'm impressed you haven't gone the way of those flogs at Qox Media and are actually continuing your article. Bravo sir. Bravo.

Wacky Tiger you're a god damned liar

 

[Matty411]

Matty I'm impressed you haven't gone the way of those flogs at Qox Media and are actually continuing your article. Bravo sir. Bravo.

Wacky Tiger you're a god damned liar

I'm going to see this sucker through mate! Even if it gets stale. Credit to the Captains for keeping their responses colourful and interesting.

 

[BLERN]

Oh and sexual favours if you want a better position on the ground, that approach seems to have worked for U2tigers and @BLERN

Cant believe i missed this somehow. I thought something was off when i got called in for extra sexual favours last week.

Now i find out i was just kohlphi disguised as woosh. I shouldn't be too surprised i guess. But i am

I should also add, what I hear BLERN does to get his spot, well he should be ashamed of himself. I heard they call him Bad Boy Bubby at the Warriors.

Something about a lot of 'wrapped in plastic'.

What some people get ashamed of. Others call a standard wednesday night. We all have different standards. Mine are more on the non-existent side of things.

 

[Harvey Manfrenjensenden]

I feel sorry for people who think Loonerty is in charge of the Hawks

I appreciate the sentiment mate, but I'm happy with my leadership role.

 

[Matty411]

Captain Conversations with Golumless

I sit here this morning having now interviewed five of our ‘illustrious’ (generous) SFA captains, nursing writer’s cramp; jet lag; and a bit of a hangover as a result of a loss to my next subject’s mob. Whilst I was in no mood to hang around any longer at the House of Gumby, it made sense to work in my next Captain’s chat while I was here – with none other than Golumless

M411: G’day mate, how’re you feeling after the win on the weekend? Have the parties stopped yet since you beat the reigning premiers?

GL: I dunno, but beating the reigning premiers during the minor round isn't that exciting. I'm more excited we've gone 4 weeks undefeated.

M411: This is true – the only wins that truly count are in finals. Now, the Gumbies were established way back in S04. How long have you been on board and held the top mantle for?

GL: I came over with Noobz0r at the start of S24, and we both took over the captaincy on coming to the Gumbies.

M411: S16 holds a special place in Gumbies history. Do you ever think the club will scale those heights again?

GL: Absolutely, eventually a 50/50 sim will reward us with a premiership.

M411: As the man leading your side, how would you say you’ve helped foster the culture at the Gumbies and how would you best describe that culture?

GL: I like it, it has a pretty old school vibe to it currently with 10-12 posters (which I believe is the ideal number of posters, seeing any more is just overkill) that primarily just are there to banter with others. I don't think I can say if I have helped foster that, and it's not really something I'm focused on.

M411: What’s the best day you’ve had on the Qooty field?

GL: Winning and kicking 5 goals in the S21 grand final.

M411: What's the difference between Golumless the poster and Golumless the Qooty player?

GL: Golumless the Qooty player can be a spud, Golumless the poster is never a spud.

M411: It seems you’ve really recruited well this year, with both hotkorma and Jade showing their wares on and off the field. Is this the start of a mini-rebuild or change of guard?

GL: Definitely the start of a change of guards. I'm realistic enough to say I'm coming to the end of myself being a very active poster in this league. Players like Jade, hotkorma etc are pretty much the future of this club.

M411: Looking at the big picture of the SFA, in your opinion what is the most defining event in the history of the SFA?

GL: That's a tough one, but would have to go the rejection of A.N.I.M.A.L.S side. That saved the league, it did.

M411: So what is your personal SFA Career Highlight?

GL: Definitely captaining the winning grand final side in S21.

M411: Wrapping up, do you have any words of wisdom for the S25 rookie class?

GL: This is going to sound weird, but for the most part, ignore your teammates posts. Your role as a poster is to banter with the opposition which means 90%+ of your posts should either be quoting an opposition or tagging an opposition player. The moment you start primarily talking to your teammates it makes threads impossible to get into as an opposition player, as it descends quickly into really cliquey posting, or is just incredibly boring to read.

Thanks for the chat and all the best to the Gumbies in S25.

 

[TRUMAN#1]

Captain Conversations with Golumless

I sit here this morning having now interviewed five of our ‘illustrious’ (generous) SFA captains, nursing writer’s cramp; jet lag; and a bit of a hangover as a result of a loss to my next subject’s mob. Whilst I was in no mood to hang around any longer at the House of Gumby, it made sense to work in my next Captain’s chat while I was here – with none other than Golumless

M411: G’day mate, how’re you feeling after the win on the weekend? Have the parties stopped yet since you beat the reigning premiers?

GL: I dunno, but beating the reigning premiers during the minor round isn't that exciting. I'm more excited we've gone 4 weeks undefeated.

M411: This is true – the only wins that truly count are in finals. Now, the Gumbies were established way back in S04. How long have you been on board and held the top mantle for?

GL: I came over with Noobz0r at the start of S24, and we both took over the captaincy on coming to the Gumbies.

M411: S16 holds a special place in Gumbies history. Do you ever think the club will scale those heights again?

GL: Absolutely, eventually a 50/50 sim will reward us with a premiership.

M411: As the man leading your side, how would you say you’ve helped foster the culture at the Gumbies and how would you best describe that culture?

GL: I like it, it has a pretty old school vibe to it currently with 10-12 posters (which I believe is the ideal number of posters, seeing any more is just overkill) that primarily just are there to banter with others. I don't think I can say if I have helped foster that, and it's not really something I'm focused on.

M411: What’s the best day you’ve had on the Qooty field?

GL: Winning and kicking 5 goals in the S21 grand final.

M411: What's the difference between Golumless the poster and Golumless the Qooty player?

GL: Golumless the Qooty player can be a spud, Golumless the poster is never a spud.

M411: It seems you’ve really recruited well this year, with both hotkorma and Jade showing their wares on and off the field. Is this the start of a mini-rebuild or change of guard?

GL: Definitely the start of a change of guards. I'm realistic enough to say I'm coming to the end of myself being a very active poster in this league. Players like Jade, hotkorma etc are pretty much the future of this club.

M411: Looking at the big picture of the SFA, in your opinion what is the most defining event in the history of the SFA?

GL: That's a tough one, but would have to go the rejection of A.N.I.M.A.L.S side. That saved the league, it did.

M411: So what is your personal SFA Career Highlight?

GL: Definitely captaining the winning grand final side in S21.

M411: Wrapping up, do you have any words of wisdom for the S25 rookie class?

GL: This is going to sound weird, but for the most part, ignore your teammates posts. Your role as a poster is to banter with the opposition which means 90%+ of your posts should either be quoting an opposition or tagging an opposition player. The moment you start primarily talking to your teammates it makes threads impossible to get into as an opposition player, as it descends quickly into really cliquey posting, or is just incredibly boring to read.

Thanks for the chat and all the best to the Gumbies in S25.

Great stuff to both of you. Always look forward to these.

 

[Agent93]

GL: This is going to sound weird, but for the most part, ignore your teammates posts. Your role as a poster is to banter with the opposition which means 90%+ of your posts should either be quoting an opposition or tagging an opposition player. The moment you start primarily talking to your teammates it makes threads impossible to get into as an opposition player, as it descends quickly into really cliquey posting, or is just incredibly boring to read.

Well said Golly.

 

[Rodney Dangerfield]

I'm going to see this sucker through mate! Even if it gets stale. Credit to the Captains for keeping their responses colourful and interesting.

Doing a great job. It’s a very rare thing In this place to stick it out, and the thread is really well done.

 

[nahnah]

Matty411 in time you will learn to make a new thread for each interview, maximising your likes per interview while simultaneously flooding the board.