Roast Collingwood

[Mungo Mulligan Stew]

Not cool, man. Seriously WTF?!

Neither will happen. He needs the cash to feed his habit, and if Bucks hasn't dropped him by now, it's not happening anytime soon.

Wow!
U actually sed it!
Undt now...das th' poop actually hit ein fan?

 

[Chilli Con Incarnate]

Normally I wait until later in the week to jump on this board. Later in the week when dust has settled and cooler heads prevail. This week it's different... I'm in need of an answer...why was this game's result so bloody disappointing? I didn't even feel like this after Freo's flogging or the unexpected loss to the Dullbogs. Was it the myriad missed opportunities? Was it the inability to run over a team with no bench? I'm not even dwelling on Young's dropped mark...if that was at the start of the match it would hardly be noticed. I know teams have their set-ups and set plays but the continual lack of "manning-up" when the opposition has the ball is beyond frustrating!
Maybe...it's just the stark realisation that we are a bit rooted.
Anybody?

It depends how you see us this year. I fully expected GC to win because they are dangerous up here and we have too many injuries. If we are honest, we haven't looked great since before the Adelaide game.

We need better performances from players like Swan and Ball and we also need to get back players like Reid, Fasolo, Elliott, Maxwell and Karnezis before we would resemble our best 22. That way we wouldn't be giving games to all these 'hard worker' type players that aren't much better than depth I.e. Blair, Dwyer, Young, Goldsack.

We have improved this year from last, but we'll likely still end up in the same ladder position. Last night we showed how poor our skills can be and their kids were better than our kids. Don't underestimate the GC either, they are a better team than they are given credit for and will a force for awhile now from here on out.

 

[ipswichpies]

Also, I hate to say it, but Swan looks just about cooked. If he can't play midfield there's no point in him being in the AFL team.

After watching last night,s match live and Swan closely I think unfortunately what you say is true he was not good tonight he won,t be returning to his former glories.

 

[mattys123]

One thing I'll criticise the club for is their approach to this game.

We knew the ball was going to get slippery yet in every training session we had we trained with "normal" dry footballs.

Some laughed when I suggested putting the balls in soapy water to simulate the game conditions, but it simply makes sense.

We do not prepare for different conditions well, never have, never will.

 

[ipswichpies]

I was at the match I don,t know what it was like on tv but it was bloody hard work being there at the ground.

For us it was case of 2 Pies teams out there last night in the first half we were quite good moving the ball well and quite fluently but the 2nd half we were diabolical lost our run completely and it was painful to watch.

I know Young dropped that mark and it cost us a near certain goal but I think they probably still would have won and probably rightly so.

We had many chances to bury them in the 1st half and should of been 5 or 6 goals up,they were moving the ball well in that half and there was a great build up from down back and it finished with Seedsman hitting Cloke on the chest 20 out and on the angle.It was a great passage of play and it should of been finished properly but it was par for the course from Cloke he was good tonight especially in the 1st half.

Ben Kennedy was great tonight he has to stay in now,we were very undersized down back against them and I can tell you now they will be top 4 from next season on and they were even better when they lost Ablett who had been held well but I think was starting to get going when injured.

Swan I think will never reach the heights he was at even last season he is now 30 and starting to look an old thirty,Smith cleaned up both our boys in the ruck contest but Witts was superior to Grundy but neither were a match for smith I just hope the 2nds win today.

 

[cleomenes]

It was terrible to see our side kick and fumble the game away, and then lack the heart to win it back when the opposition was crippled. The non selection of Maxwell was clearly an error, with Toovey having to man up a 200 cm player most of the evening. So disappointing to see Cloke back to his erratic shots from close in. I thought he had worked that out.
Grundy was not the right tall choice, and again it was very disappointing to see Sidebottom have to bump him away from doing something stupid.
Reid is desperately needed.
Keeffe has real problems one out, and needs to be kept from these situations so that his positives can be best used. Hard to do when the side is one tall defender short.

 

[SuperSub17]

Swan I think will never reach the heights he was at even last season he is now 30 and starting to look an old thirty,Smith cleaned up both our boys in the ruck contest but Witts was superior to Grundy but neither were a match for smith I just hope the 2nds win today.

I thought Witts towelled up Smith. Both had 12 touches, but Witts had 7 kicks to 3 and then smashed him in the hit outs 33-14.

 

[frizzle]

I thought Witts towelled up Smith. Both had 12 touches, but Witts had 7 kicks to 3 and then smashed him in the hit outs 33-14.

Exactly - Witts was one of our few winners on the night. They even started going 3rd man up to nullify him.

 

[Cousin of Daicos]

The poster in this thread saying Young seemed to be born missing a chromosone seemed a clear shot at a member of Clinton's family. That's what I was referring to.

I reckon you chose to see what you wanted to see in that case. Like a lot of people who make a living out of being offended by stuff. "Missing a chromosome" is a pretty old knock on someone. I've heard it used for years and especially long before Young got to Collingwood.

 

[Scallop Industry Thug]

I reckon you chose to see what you wanted to see in that case. Like a lot of people who make a living out of being offended by stuff. "Missing a chromosome" is a pretty old knock on someone. I've heard it used for years and especially long before Young got to Collingwood.

That's why I said if it was deliberate.

 

[Cousin of Daicos]

That's why I said if it was deliberate.

I doubt it. Missing a chromosome is another way of calling someone a stupid idiot.

 

[Cory]

That's why I said if it was deliberate.

Isn't surprising that he hasn't posted since. Obviously posted it deliberate then pissed off before any anger towards him.

 

[ipswichpies]

In Young,s defence he was reasonable tonight until his head wound, he was not our worst by a long stretch and he pulled off a couple of nice tackles as did Toovey.

Swan is definitely getting by on reputation he did nothing tonight and looked very ordinary he seems like he has lost his leg speed it is rare to see him breakaway these days.

 

[ipswichpies]

I thought Witts towelled up Smith. Both had 12 touches, but Witts had 7 kicks to 3 and then smashed him in the hit outs 33-14.

On those stats Witts certainly did get the better of Smith I just knew he was better than Grundy tonight but apology to Witts,y I think I might just of been so upset by the whole performance that I was not correct about Witts as I say sorry Witts,y.

 

[SuperSub17]

Isn't surprising that he hasn't posted since. Obviously posted it deliberate then pissed off before any anger towards him.

He's been banned

 

[Markfs]

Well I'm glad that you're laughing but I think you need to have a good look at yourself if you're laughing after a loss like that one. Some of us are trying to identify the things that will deliver a premiership.

I didnt realise it at the time of writing this but Goldsack was laughing after the game. This is unforgivable. If he wants to enjoy himself, he should take up some form of recreational pursuit...

 

[Winston_Smith]

I doubt it. Missing a chromosome is another way of calling someone a stupid idiot.

The irony is, Down Syndrome is actually the result of an extra chromosome, revealing that poster to be no brainiac himself.

 

[Cory]

He's been banned

I reported it, glad it worked

 

[Manic Magpie]

@uck you're unfunny and boring!.. do you ever have anything to say other than lame attempts at ridicule? You try so hard to be clever all the time but fail.. is it some kind of compensatory thing that you need to just latch on to what others say and try to ridicule it but never EVER say anything yourself. There are some seriously sad @ucktards on here but for mine you are #1.. seen heaps of your work.. never been bothered to respond.. but tonight I'm happy to feed the troll.

You are speaking for yourself here, though there are other posters who don't appreciate Markfs' unique humour. Remove him and BringBackBrad and this forum would address the serious issues in an entirely serious way. Obviously that is what you and a few others of your ilk would like to happen. For me, I'd like to be able to find a chuckle or two among all the post game gloom and doom that inevitably accompanies our losses. With Obese Arachnid gone and rufio less active, this forum needs all the humour it can get.

 

[Markfs]

You are speaking for yourself here, though there are other posters who don't appreciate Markfs' unique humour. Remove him and BringBackBrad and this forum would address the serious issues in an entirely serious way. Obviously that is what you and a few others of your ilk would like to happen. For me, I'd like to be able to find a chuckle or two among all the post game gloom and doom that inevitably accompanies our losses. With Obese Arachnid gone and rufio less active, this forum needs all the humour it can get.

Thanks for the support but we worked out our misunderstandings. I think he thought I was taking the piss out of some people's posts... maybe his own. I just reassured him that I was dead serious with my views on Kyle Martin and the need to dump some of the below average performers. If KMart was playing yesterday, I don't think there's any question that we would have won. As for the useless team, well

As Rustin said "Macaffer (around the ground), Blair, Goldsack, Frost, Keeffe, Lumumba... None of them would get a game for another top 8 club." I totally agree. We should ditich all of em.

Swan is passed his use-by date. Young was embarassing. Both should be traded. I certainly agree with those comments

As Peter said.....

Our forwardline is terrible. We only have Cloke and Elliott who can kick a goal.

Goldsack - He may led the league in forward pressure acts, but playing in the forward line should still mean your main priority is to kick goals.
Blair - Like Goldsack, he is all hustle and no hurt factor.
Grundy - Cant mark, he is totally useless as a key forward.
White - Major disappointment, Lynch had a better year last season.

Buckley the main culprit for the disfunctional forwardline. Far too much rope is given to Goldsack, Blair and Dwyer when they are not kicking goals.
Players like Martin, Karnezis and Kennedy have spent too much time in VFL when they should of been given more of an opportunity.

I agree with all of this. We need to turf White and Blair and probably Buckley too.....I could go on but you get drift. I agree almost all that these guys are saying. I think it's all pretty much spot on...totally right. I'm saying this in a serious way, just like these guys are.

 

[frizzle]

Thanks for the support but we worked out our misunderstandings. I think he thought I was taking the piss out of some people's posts... maybe his own. I just reassured him that I was dead serious with my views on Kyle Martin and the need to dump some of the below average performers. If KMart was playing yesterday, I don't think there's any question that we would have won. As for the useless team, well

As Rustin said "Macaffer (around the ground), Blair, Goldsack, Frost, Keeffe, Lumumba... None of them would get a game for another top 8 club." I totally agree. We should ditich all of em.

Swan is passed his use-by date. Young was embarassing. Both should be traded. I certainly agree with those comments

As Peter said.....



I agree with all of this. We need to turf White and Blair and probably Buckley too.....I could go on but you get drift. I agree almost all that these guys are saying. I think it's all pretty much spot on...totally right. I'm saying this in a serious way, just like these guys are.

Wow - think of all the draft picks we will have in November.
With all that salary cap room Bucks could go all out on his next big trade target.



Josh Bootsma

 

[Markfs]

Wow - think of all the draft picks we will have in November.
With all that salary cap room Bucks could go all out on his next big trade target.



Josh Bootsma

The question is whether Bucks is the man to do the targeting. I think a lot of us have been questioning the coaching abilities of that man after the game. We have questioned his pig-headedness in keeping Blair and Lumumba in the team. He is clearly jealous of the skills of Kyle Martin. That can be the only explanation why he keeps Kyle off the senior list.

I like your sarcastic comment about Bootsma but we should never consider an ex carlton flog. Better to target Cameron with a multi-million deal using half a dozen of the players that I mentioned above as trade-bait.

Finally after moving on much of the coaching panel that seems to be totally lacking in ideas, I would hope that the new coach and team could foster a new culture of pride in the jumper and total loyalty to the club. Obviously, we would need to give them a year or two to put that into place.

 

[frizzle]

The question is whether Bucks is the man to do the targeting. I think a lot of us have been questioning the coaching abilities of that man after the game. We have questioned his pig-headedness in keeping Blair and Lumumba in the team. He is clearly jealous of the skills of Kyle Martin. That can be the only explanation why he keeps Kyle off the senior list.

I like your sarcastic comment about Bootsma but we should never consider an ex carlton flog. Better to target Cameron with a multi-million deal using half a dozen of the players that I mentioned above as trade-bait.

Finally after moving on much of the coaching panel that seems to be totally lacking in ideas, I would hope that the new coach and team could foster a new culture of pride in the jumper and total loyalty to the club. Obviously, we would need to give them a year or two to put that into place.

I like your way of thinking

 

[Markfs]

I like your way of thinking

Well I think it's obvious to take that approach especially after the flogging that we got from Gold Coast. There just doenst appear to be any pride in the jumper anymore and Swan is obviously just playing for the money. Better to get rid of all of them and replace them with loyal players. We need to take this approach on an ongoing basis, regularly appraising the list for loyalty and getting rid of players who dont measure up. We also need to get rid of most of the oldies too....I would think the same approach can be used with the coaching panel. The coaches also need to be constantly coming up with new ideas and challenging the club. If they dont do that and also stay loyal, then they need to be dumped...

 

[frizzle]

Well I think it's obvious to take that approach especially after the flogging that we got from Gold Coast. There just doenst appear to be any pride in the jumper anymore and Swan is obviously just playing for the money. Better to get rid of all of them and replace them with loyal players. We need to take this approach on an ongoing basis, regularly appraising the list for loyalty and getting rid of players who dont measure up. We also need to get rid of most of the oldies too....I would think the same approach can be used with the coaching panel. The coaches also need to be constantly coming up with new ideas and challenging the club. If they dont do that and also stay loyal, then they need to be dumped...

Nice. Now on a side note.
How do I deal with posters that are continually stealing my urine.