Health Depression

[Coolangatta]

I'm the opposite. A boss at public speaking, good one on one, but pretty shit in groups.

 

[brett15]

I completely disagree. I think someone can get anxiety without suffering from depression. I don't have depression but get extreme anxiety with anything to do with speaking in public. I need to take a xanax before i'm required to speak in public otherwise my voice sounds like i'm about to cry. I've tried all manner of mindfulness and breathing exercises but they are unable to control this anxiety so i take medication for it.

I also think that it's common for people to suffer from atleast a mild form of anxiety in social situations (which is probably why so many gatherings are centred around alcohol).

It's confusing, and certainly a lot of the time the reasons for anxiety don't seem to make sense.

Anxiety as a self defense mechanism is designed to keep oneself safe and/or within their comfort zone. Running away from a burning building in fear is a good thing, as an example.

Public speaking for most is a daunting task because it takes the person from their comfort zone and exposes them raw to an entire audience.

From what I'm reading, if one isn't comfortable with public speaking, then they probably lack confidence in some regard. Probing further into that area may also reveal not only self-confidence related issues but also other intangibles effecting their self-esteem, and where self-esteem is possibly low depression may follow.

It's somewhat an emotional flow of process that leads from one thing to another. If someone tells me something about themselves it usually opens up a pandoras box of possible outcomes.

I'm sorry to hear you need xanax and other medication to cope, but know that it's perfectly normal and fine to feel the way you do, and if taking them helps you to cope with every day life then that just as fine as well

I also like to encourage optimism and hope that in the future things will get better. I genuinely believe anyone can heal with the right guidance and therapeutic treatment from a health practitioner.

Hope that helps.

As difficult as this is, it is very successful (particularly if you have avoidant/safety behaviours)

Fully agree

 

[nicky]

I'm sorry to hear you need xanax and other medication to cope, but know that it's perfectly normal and fine to feel the way you do, and if taking them helps you to cope with every day life then that just as fine as well

Only xanax, there is no other medication

Still disagree with you re anxiety = depression. The two are not necessarily related at all.

edit: I just re-read this and i've got to say i feel totally patronised by your post. I probably am in a situation where i need to take a xanax once or twice a month, i.e. not often. So patting me on the head and telling me 'what i'm doing to cope with everyday life is ok by you' is totally condescending and more importantly, misguided.

I'm not sure if you're trying to be a dick or you just have no idea how to communicate with people.

 

[CLUBMEDhurst]

I completely disagree. I think someone can get anxiety without suffering from depression. I don't have depression but get extreme anxiety with anything to do with speaking in public. I need to take a xanax before i'm required to speak in public otherwise my voice sounds like i'm about to cry. I've tried all manner of mindfulness and breathing exercises but they are unable to control this anxiety so i take medication for it.

I also think that it's common for people to suffer from atleast a mild form of anxiety in social situations (which is probably why so many gatherings are centred around alcohol).

TreatmentRecent studies confirm that public-speaking anxiety is amenable to cognitive–behavioral therapy (CBT) programs that include novel ways of exposure to the feared situations, including exposure to virtual reality environments and exposure to video-taped audiences on the Internet. Recent studies also suggest that there are additional treatment modalities, such as the administration of drugs prior to exposure, which might enhance the efficacy of currently available CBT programs.

http://www.sadag.org/index.php?opti...blic-speaking-and-anxiety&catid=71&Itemid=485

Graded exposure may help as well Nicky (sorry 'bout bangin' on about exposure therapy, but in my clinical practice 'tis very effective treatment)

 

[nicky]

http://www.sadag.org/index.php?opti...blic-speaking-and-anxiety&catid=71&Itemid=485

Graded exposure may help as well Nicky (sorry 'bout bangin' on about exposure therapy, but in my clinical practice 'tis very effective treatment)

Thanks i'll look into that

 

[Quicky]

In light of the Harry O'Brien story we managed to get an interview for our podcast with Kate Carnell the CEO of Beyond Blue. We discussed Harry O and mental health in general. It's a really great interview which provides some really important information. I recommend you give it a listen and hopefully it helps some people. The interview starts at 20:24.


FYI 76woodenspooners

 

[Power Raid]

Depression is a massive issue in the fast pace modern world. Unfortunately modern medicine is quick to issue drugs as the solution.

I think we need to take a look at our lives, our education system, our diets and our relationships. Depression caused by chemical imbalances can be treated by drugs but we may have to look a little harder at our lifestyles, society values and how we look after each other.

Good luck everyone.

 

[TheFreshBanana]

Depression is a massive issue in the fast pace modern world. Unfortunately modern medicine is quick to issue drugs as the solution.

I think we need to take a look at our lives, our education system, our diets and our relationships. Depression caused by chemical imbalances can be treated by drugs but we may have to look a little harder at our lifestyles, society values and how we look after each other.

Good luck everyone.

When I was suffering from depression, I was often told that medication wasn't the answer, it was just a bit of a stepping stone.

I think it's definitely Hollywood and TV that not only produces the stigma that depression has today, but the falsehood of anti depressants.

 

[Power Raid]

When I was suffering from depression, I was often told that medication wasn't the answer, it was just a bit of a stepping stone.

I think it's definitely Hollywood and TV that not only produces the stigma that depression has today, but the falsehood of anti depressants.

did the drugs help long term or short term.

What did you find as the key to long term success?

 

[TheFreshBanana]

did the drugs help long term or short term.

What did you find as the key to long term success?

Definitely. The problem with depression, was that I knew how to get over it in theory, but it was like none of it was processing or couldn't cognitively stick. The antidepressants gave me a brief window to think clearly in my head, it was like a massive fog faded, and I could finally start beginning to change my way of thinking.

And not sure if I can comment on long term success, I'm off the antidepressants, but I still struggle with it every now and then. I don't think it necessarily gets easier, but I do find that I have the experience now to know how to overcome it.

What I do when I know I begin to fall into a depressive mood, is I book an appointment with the counseller asap. It gives me a chance to let it all out, and not let it stir in my head. And most of the time, the counsellors are really good and you can bounce thoughts of eachother. This year, I have gone 4 times now and haven't really gone a second time after, because I've figured out what I have to do.

I then try and figure out what the source of my depression is. Because, at least for me, depression can be layers and layers of just small insecurities and problems that can feel like a big deal. You need to kind of pick away and figure out what the source of this depressive episode is. I then can either accept it and move on, or take action as to how I can fix the problem.

And my final step is to just relax, do something I enjoy, forget about it and just let time heal wounds.

 

[_Christoh_]

When I was on medication for depression it was to stop major mood swings. I didnt at any stage felt like they were helping in anyway. What helped me more than anything was gaining my own understanding of how different therapies work. The ones that were brilliant for me were emotional choice theory, pure mindfullness or pure awareness and a half dozen sessions of cognitive therapy.

I now choose how I feel and I choose to be happy.

 

[_Christoh_]

I then try and figure out what the source of my depression is. Because, at least for me, depression can be layers and layers of just small insecurities and problems that can feel like a big deal. You need to kind of pick away and figure out what the source of this depressive episode is. I then can either accept it and move on, or take action as to how I can fix the problem.

And my final step is to just relax, do something I enjoy, forget about it and just let time heal wounds.

As a counsellor I focus on this alot.

 

[TheFreshBanana]

As a counsellor I focus on this alot.

One thing I learnt very quickly, when I first developed depression, was that I can't control other people's actions but I can only control my own.

This is something that I've pretty much instilled into my head, and pretty much comes to me naturally now.

 

[_Christoh_]

Absolutely spot on. You can extend that out to your overall emotional state too and this is what I do too. If you can achieve a emotional state that you are content with or even better happy with, it then becomes imperative to protect that emotional state. If an event or person unsettles that state, you have some choices...accept it and do nothing, find a course of action you are happy with and act, or if it is out of your control to do anything about it just dont invest any emotional energy into the situation and move on keeping your happy place (as I like to call it lol) intact.

When something angers me or stresses me before I decide what to do about the situation I decide how I want to feel about the situation first so I can deal with it in the best possible manner.

 

[dales.girl38]

Read through the first 20 or so pages here tonight, lots of support which is nice to see.

I've been back from my exchange semester for 2.5 months now and I just can't get over my feeling of..emptiness, sadness, loneliness. I can't get out of bed in the mornings and when I do, I end up sleeping during the day anyway. My friendship group dynamic has totally changed since I got back, mostly centred around my best friend of 10 years who I have never had a fight with before. I feel completely betrayed by her and I can't even face her to have a conversation with her. I don’t leave the house unless I have a specific appointment that involves other people relying on me. I’m not myself at work – I didn't tell anyone there when it was my birthday because I knew they'd make a fuss that I didn't want. I don't even really feel like going to the football anymore, mum’s dragged me there a couple of times since I got back and I know she will this week, which is probably good for me. I don't answer the phone anymore, even though I know it'll be my nanny or aunty or someone who will be nice to me and would like to hear from me.

I have been completely disenchanted by my university since seeing how different it can be, I've been lumped with mostly online classes, in fact I have 2 on-campus hours per fortnight. I haven't done any work outside of those 2 hours for at least 3 weeks now, maybe 4, I’m losing track of the weeks. It’s getting to assignment time and I still can't do anything. I've got 5 units (including the 3 I have this semester) remaining in my 4 year degree and I have an HD average, I've never got less than a D, that'll change this semester. I left the easy classes for the end, I’m doing a first year subject and I won't even do well at that.

I've been seeing my uni counsellor for the past month or so, she’s just referred me to my GP because she thinks I need medication. She was setting me goals that I couldn't reach, really easy goals too. Couldn’t do the two 10 minute walks she wanted me to go on, couldn't get up at 9am like she wanted me to. I set my alarm on my dresser, got up for 20 minutes, back to bed. I play volleyball which is always the highlight of my week, but even there my mind goes blank and I completely mess up at times because of it. I managed to live in New York for 5 months and pretty much maintain my weight (I don't weigh myself, but I felt roughly the same), I've put on weight since I've been home for sure. I'm dreading the warmer weather because all I feel like wearing are things that cover everything. I'm ashamed of myself.

My mum keeps trying the ‘there are people out there much worse than you’ line and I get angry at her because it doesn't make me feel happier to know that there are people with bigger problems, how is that supposed to help? Is only one person in the world allowed to be unhappy? She wants to come to my doctor’s appointment but if I have to go I want to be alone, although the idea of reliving all of those conversations that I had with my counsellor is horrible to me. I cry my eyes out at every appointment and feel even worse for the rest of the day than usual. I’m scared that someone thinks I need medication, I don’t want to need it.


Sorry for the long rant.. I just can't keep it to myself anymore. Took me longer to type than I'd planned..

 

[nicky]

You poor darling, that sounds awful. I felt depressed for 6 months when i moved back to Australia. I felt like i'd moved back to an isolated, backwater shithole - seriously took me 6 months to get over the culture shock.

Medication might help get you back on track then you can come off it again. Perhaps ask your doctor to keep that in mind when prescribing you something.

Your counsellor is spot on with her suggestion to go for a small walk everyday. Maybe try a 5 minute walk?

And it's probably a wise move at this stage to stay away from the footy

 

[nicky]

When something angers me or stresses me before I decide what to do about the situation I decide how I want to feel about the situation first so I can deal with it in the best possible manner.

This is the best thing i've read in a long time. Thanks, i'm seriously going to adopt this approach. Has the potential to revolutionise my life

 

[Black Diamond]

That's some pretty bad stuff, dales.girl38. This paragraph stood out to me:

My mum keeps trying the ‘there are people out there much worse than you’ line and I get angry at her because it doesn't make me feel happier to know that there are people with bigger problems, how is that supposed to help? Is only one person in the world allowed to be unhappy? She wants to come to my doctor’s appointment but if I have to go I want to be alone, although the idea of reliving all of those conversations that I had with my counsellor is horrible to me. I cry my eyes out at every appointment and feel even worse for the rest of the day than usual. I’m scared that someone thinks I need medication, I don’t want to need it.

Unfortunately people just won't get it unless they have had it. Sounds like she is saying "put on a smile and everything will be fine". In reality you are probably better accepting how you feel. I'd give her the benefit of the doubt though because she is you mum.

 

[dales.girl38]

You poor darling, that sounds awful. I felt depressed for 6 months when i moved back to Australia. I felt like i'd moved back to an isolated, backwater shithole - seriously took me 6 months to get over the culture shock.

Medication might help get you back on track then you can come off it again. Perhaps ask your doctor to keep that in mind when prescribing you something.

Your counsellor is spot on with her suggestion to go for a small walk everyday. Maybe try a 5 minute walk?

And it's probably a wise move at this stage to stay away from the footy

Thanks Nicky. Page 8 and 9 on this thread were helpful as it seems a few posters have had this problem after living overseas.

I don't know why I can't go on a walk, I try, sometimes I get into my runners and that's about all I can do. Can't get out the front door.

Now now, we've been playing well since I got back I was crying in the car on the way to the West Coast game, ended up enjoying myself and we won, but if I'd had the choice I wouldn't have gone.

That's some pretty bad stuff, dales.girl38. This paragraph stood out to me:

Unfortunately people just won't get it unless they have had it. Sounds like she is saying "put on a smile and everything will be fine". In reality you are probably better accepting how you feel. I'd give her the benefit of the doubt though because she is you mum.

Thanks UYI. My mum is trying to help, and I feel guilty every time I snap at her and make her upset. She wants to know why I'm so down all the time, but I don't want to talk to her about it.

 

[Smiling Buddha]

Very common for people to feel down when they get back from exchange. Very common. They even warned us about 'reverse culture shock' in our prep sessions before we left. They were right.

Of the Aussies I met on exchange, a fair few struggled to readjust when we got back to our 'homeland'. Several were back overseas again within twelve months. In my case I gtfo of Melbourne as soon as I could.

I liken the big exchange to the red/blue pill dichotomy. Once you realise how shallow/meaningless/only-sustained-by-inertia your pre-exchange lifestyle had been, it can be difficult to return to it.

I wish I could tell you that I am happier now, three years since returning, than I was before I left for my own exchange. But I'm not sure I am. How much of this is to do with the RCS, and how much is due to other factors (such as mere passage of time i.e. aging) I obviously can't know.

 

[dales.girl38]

I remember at our orientation session that the student advisors were saying that it sucks to go home, and if you can go for a year you 100% should - I didn't have that option, can't graduate over there. The advice was more to stay in touch with your friends at home so that when you get home you can fit back in easier - I did that really well I thought, then once I got home things went to pieces anyway.

If I had the money, I'd look at doing my post-grad overseas. I don't think I'd qualify another OS-HELP loan though, pretty sure it's a one off thing, and I don't know if I'd just be trying to recreate something that will never be the same again. Currently saving for a graduation (probably post-grad graduation) trip with my best friend that I made, and hopefully I'll be able to visit her in NZ at some stage beforehand. They're a long way off happening though, and far from 100%.

My doctor's appointment is tomorrow, hopefully he has some good advice for me.

 

[Rainfall]

it gets easier dw

 

[skipper kelly]

I have wanted to post in this thread for a long time. Have typed my story many times but then just couldn't post it. I don't know why. Maybe, and this is me thinking out loud, it was just that to include one part I had to include another part and eventually it was too long and too much and ra ra ra.

Anyway, its probably truthful to say I am a long time sufferer of depression. Have had 3 major episodes, 1983 (18), 1996 (31) and 2009 (44). Not going to say that each one was easier than the one before. In fact, each one was worse and more damaging. The only difference was I had more knowledge.

Long story short. In 2011 I had to get out of the black hole so I decided to do Uni online, with the goal of attending one day. Enrolled through Open Uni and decided that it would be wise to do their essay writing unit first. The subject of the main assignment was basically whatever you liked. I started researching a certain subject when I stumbled on perfectionism.This may not be news to some but I found this article to be very helpful.

"Negative Perfectionism: Examining Negative Excessive Behavior in the Workplace" by Leonard and Harvey. ( I dont know how to post the entire PDF)

This part in particular gave me a lot to think about.

"Quadrant III: Imposter Behavior
The imposter phenomenon was first suggested in the literature by Clance and Imes (1978). Clance and Imes defined the imposter phenomenon as “an internal experience of intellectual phoniness that appears to be particularly prevalent and intense among a select sample of high achieving women” (p. 241). They attributed this phenomenon to early family dynamics and societal sex-role stereotyping. Over the years, research has indicated that the imposter phenomenon is not gender-specific, and gender is no longer seen as a contributing. characteristic (Bussotti, 1990; Harvey, 1981; Langford, 1990; Topping, 1983;
Topping & Kimel, 1985). In later research, Clance (1985) redefined the imposter phenomenon as the feeling of inauthenticity that is frequently experienced by many high achievers (not gender-specific).
Harvey and Katz (1985) described imposter-phenomenon sufferers as individuals who, despite objective evidence of competence, feel that they have fooled everyone into thinking that they are smarter or more capable than they are in reality. Imposters believe that their success is undeserved and that
future successes are not likely (King & Cooley, 1995). They attribute success that has been earned to luck, hard work, or contacts; and they believe that, rather than deserving the success, they have fooled everyone into thinking that they are intelligent. As high achievers who have recognition but do not believe that it is deserved, imposters think that people overestimate them and that they have succeeded only by accident. This situation results from setting an internal standard of perfection, but
seeking feedback from the social environment. Once again, perfectionists with a strong self-concept can cope with this misalignment and are able to move on to the next task.Perfectionists with a weak self-concept are less able to deal with the misalignment and may experience frustration and anxiety as
they attempt to perfect their task performance with the hope of continuing to receive positive social feedback and to avoid negative feedback. This need may manifest itself in behavior that is often attributed to what is termed the imposter phenomenon. The following proposition is offered:
Proposition 5. Perfectionists with a high, weakly held selfconcept, coupled with inner-directed goal setting and socially based feedback-seeking behavior, will display imposter behavior.
The most prevalent cognitive symptoms of the imposter phenomenon include reluctance to accept credit for accomplishments, feelings of selfdoubt, and a tendency to attribute success to external causes. The most prevalent affective symptoms include depression, anxiety, sadness, fear of
failure, and guilt about success. As Hirshfield (1982) pointed out, imposters lose the sense of reward and joy that ordinarily accompanies success. These individuals have difficulty accepting and enjoying the success that they earn. Many handicap themselves by stumbling through life and setting
unrealistic goals that they can never achieve. Feeling like an undeserving person can be dangerously self-fulfilling, and these individuals are particularly susceptible to self-defeating actions, such as alcohol or drug abuse (Furnham, 1998)."

All the best to everyone.

 

[Smiling Buddha]

dales.girl38 You can get OS-HELP twice, so long as you meet all of the criteria. I'm not sure how it works with post-grad, but I believe you can qualify for it if doing honours.

I get what you mean about the possibility that going on exchange again will simply be trying to recreate something you can never have again. I've looked into going on exchange again myself but I'm fully aware that nothing will ever be like that first time.

 

[dales.girl38]

Saw the doctor today, he wants me to try Sertraline, at this stage for 3 months. Does anyone have any experience with this? He gave me sleeping pills in case they keep me awake.