Describe the worst ******* person you ever had to work with

[Caesar]

I once had a colleague who was a killer combination of incompetent, overconfident, aggressively condescending and socially oblivious

he remains the only person I have ever met who was capable of both overpromising AND pissing the customer off in the same meeting

 

[Mofra]

I work with a guy who eats dry cruscuits for morning tea, every day, in an open plan office.

I just found out he also complains when other people are noisy

 

[the_interloper]

Not a colleague but a customer, twice in the last week she's claimed someone from my company made a promise to give her free s**t basically. The first time it was work we'd apparently promised was done but "unfortunately she didn't know who told her it was finished and it wasn't via email".

The second time apparently we promised free s**t in a meeting I was in. I said I didn't remember it that way "oh it must have been your other colleague, we might have had a separate meeting, sorry I don't have email proof, go and speak to your colleague". I'd already spoken to said colleague who also didn't remember us wanting to give s**t away, so she was going to get her boss to call me, he still hasn't.

 

[Freofalcon]

I work with a guy who eats dry cruscuits for morning tea, every day, in an open plan office.

I just found out he also complains when other people are noisy

I work with a guy who doesn’t courtesy flush when he takes a s**t.

campaigner

 

[RAPPA]

The boss’ youngest (44 year old) son is the company’s graphic designer. Now, if you’d stumble across the website, you’d be perplexed to think the company has a graphic designer on the payroll. He’s also a gifted Jack of all trades, because when Covid hit and the company decided to turn out admin support, they moved him into the role. Not only does he habitually record contact numbers incorrectly, but he also $hits the bed when on the phone, failing to get relevant details about the client enquiry. So all we end up with is “X called. Can you please give them a call back” and hoping he recorded the number correctly.

Anyway, so being the boss’ youngest son, he still has mum driving him to his appointments and mum and dad wiping his arse.

The silver spoon and ineptitude is not the worst part. He also has an unrelenting habit of unleashing burps. After about 10 of them you might get an “excuse me” but pig boy still hasn’t cottoned on how disgusting the loud belching is in a small office space. That, and and every time he gets up and sits down from his chair it’s accompanied by a grunting sound. Probably fitting as his name is Grant.

 

[nobbyiscool]

I once had the kind of manager you have nightmares about. Didn't care to support you through your challenges, but wanted to know all about your successes so he could take credit for them.

I ended up flipping a table during that "separation meeting", I was proud of myself that I didn't throw it at him. Still can't believe how much free work I gave those campaigners for it to end like that.

 

[kickazz]

I work with a guy who eats dry cruscuits for morning tea, every day, in an open plan office.

I just found out he also complains when other people are noisy

This wasn't annoying so much as amusing, but this reminds me of an office colleague who always had an apple for morning tea at his desk. The thing was that every day, at precisely 10:30, we would metronomically hear that first bite. You could literally set your watch to it.