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Divorce

  • Thread starter Thread starter Duritz
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Shell said:
It was the first divorce, ever in our family. That includes grandparents/aunts/uncles.

I also really liked his wife too, we got along really well. So I missed her, but the stories I heard about her (from my aunty) she was a complete bitch who was very selfish in the end. Going thru with a wedding, just because it's all organised/invitations sent out, etc is not the right thing to do if you really don't wish to marry the guy.
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At the church door my dad turned to me and said "are you sure, it's not too late to change your mind"

Obviously he felt it wasn't going to go the distance but tbh I just don't know whether I would of had the courage to change my mind at that point - kudos to those who do
 
WCErevival said:
The moral of the story is don't get married
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nah, not at all. its the same if you are just de-facto and break up (partic if there are kids involved) - all the same rules apply (re financial splits, lawyers, etc).
the 'marriage' makes no difference.
 

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MEB_ said:
As someone whose parents divorced, I have to say that while it was hard, it was a shitload better than listening to them fight every single day over the stupidest shit. I think when people stay together 'for the children' it can do more harm than good.
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It was more a relief when my parents divorced and not having to hear them fight all the time. Often wondered why they ever got married in the first place as they never seemed to like each other much, I think it was mostly due to having kids that they got married and stayed together so long.
 
Not divorce but.
I heard a story on late night talk back radio.The guy called up he and hes now ex were having a fight one night then next minute he heard a huge bang go off, the bish shot him in the left eye.He survived somehow! but is blind in both eyes and he ended up meeting someone new and been married for ten years.

I wonder if he was done for tempt murder?
 
I grew up in an unbroken home but I remember other families just seeming ****ed up to me as a kid. Relatives, family friends, parents of friends etc.

Sometimes you'd look at a household and wonder if anyone living in it was actually happy at any stage. I remember one family friend who seemed to hate his wife (to be fair she was awful) the entire time I knew them, and I think they divorced when I was a teenager so would've been married at least a decade by that point since I knew them as a young kid. Has since re-married and while I haven't been to their house when out in public with his new wife he isn't visibly agitated by her presence.
 
Plugger35 said:
It was more a relief when my parents divorced and not having to hear them fight all the time. Often wondered why they ever got married in the first place as they never seemed to like each other much, I think it was mostly due to having kids that they got married and stayed together so long.
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Same, my parents are complete opposites...but they met when they were 16, moved in at 18 and were married at 21 so I guess they hadn't even grown up yet before getting married.
 

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**** this thread is sad, i'm feeling like shit just reading through it knowing that it could happen to me.
we've been married since '99 and have 3 teenage kids. i've always wanted the same type of life my parents had when i grew up, nothing flash just a nice house, good education for my kids, a happy marriage and a holiday on the goldy every couple of years.
we have our disagreements from time to time but i don't think either of us has ever thought about splitting up.
i imagine the emotional trauma would be 100 times worse than the financial despair
 
Just think about all the spare time you'll have.

You can spend it on Big footy.
 
**** divorce. Robbed my brother and I of our childhoods, and I doubt we'll ever fully recover.

The issue was not the divorce itself, but the egoism of our parents in so doing. If you hold a grudge against your ex, do so privately. Don't use your kids as pawns in your war. Absolutely revolting the way my parents handled it. I could never forgive them
 
Catgirl said:
**** divorce. Robbed my brother and I of our childhoods, and I doubt we'll ever fully recover.

The issue was not the divorce itself, but the egoism of our parents in so doing. If you hold a grudge against your ex, do so privately. Don't use your kids as pawns in your war. Absolutely revolting the way my parents handled it. I could never forgive them
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I'm hearing ya. My parents divorce was all about them, nothing was done to cushion the blow. Oh well I try to be the best parent I can be.
 
I'm sorry to hear that Catgirl - nothing makes me angrier than parents who use their kids as pawns to punish. The only one who gets hurt in all of that is the child. I've made plenty of mistakes as a parent but the one thing I can be proud of is that I never disparaged or criticised my ex in front of my daughter - she was able to draw her own conclusions and make her own decisions once she was old enough to do so.
 
I'm glad that both my parents always kept their issues separate to my brother and I when they divorced. My dad has literally never said a single bad thing about my mother to my brother and I. Mother very rarely said anything bad about my dad.

I've always been so relieved about that when I see how much divorce has affected other people due to the selfishness of their parents.

Although, one of them, I think mum, asked me if their divorce was why I went from girl to girl when I was 19. I had to reassure her that my affection is transient, and she did a wonderful job as a mother.
 

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Do 'In-Laws' ever become a cause for divorce? Been married 3 years and its good, but nightly, every ****ing night The wife's mum calls and they sit on the phone for a ****ing hour or more. Sometimes it's good for me, I can just go do what I want, but sometimes it's an abhorrent interruption that pisses me off. Her mum is a great person, apart from constanty sucking air through her teeth and taking millions of photos of every meal, or everything we ever do together. Im really trying to lay off the facebook crap and live lie in the minute but **** me who needs another photo of another meal, who gives a shit.
 
Catfish Alley said:
I'm sure some have. If someone puts others in front of their spouse all the time (even if it is a parent) it would cause issues.

The teeth and Facebook thing is something you kind of have to put up with. Not the phone thing though. Talk to your wife about it.
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The teeth thing is like a neurotnicity of my own I have to deal with, but it drives me nuts. There's nothing wrong with her spending an hour on the phone per night with her mum ... it gives me time to do things, It's the photos I hate and for 12 months now Ive been making a point that I dont like it or dont want it, but you know, happy snaps for happy families.

She was here a couple of weeks back and we have a DJI Mavic drone.. I flew that ****ing thing in their faces all weekend filming asses in bikinis and right in their faces while they're in the pool. Yeah I was a campaigner, but it was my version of her paparrazi bullshit.
 
Been through the whole thing over the past 4 years, moving out, renting, selling the family home, fractured relationships with children, settlement negotiations, and new relationships. Its been a hell of a journey. Financially? Its cost me a many many hundreds of thousands of dollars. The only bonuses were we were lucky to sell our home in the middle of the real estate boom meaning we got a crazy price for the place giving us both sufficient funds to buy new homes in good suburbs. I have a new partner who is wonderful. Moving forward there are still major issues with my children even though they still want me involved in their lives.
 
The Dice Man said:
Do 'In-Laws' ever become a cause for divorce? Been married 3 years and its good, but nightly, every ******* night The wife's mum calls and they sit on the phone for a ******* hour or more. Sometimes it's good for me, I can just go do what I want, but sometimes it's an abhorrent interruption that pisses me off. Her mum is a great person, apart from constanty sucking air through her teeth and taking millions of photos of every meal, or everything we ever do together. Im really trying to lay off the facebook crap and live lie in the minute but **** me who needs another photo of another meal, who gives a shit.
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I'm not sure- but I can tell you this when I broke up with my bf the no1 ****ing thing was I didnt and never have to speak to his parents- ever. again. Happy days.
 
The Dice Man said:
Do 'In-Laws' ever become a cause for divorce? Been married 3 years and its good, but nightly, every ******* night The wife's mum calls and they sit on the phone for a ******* hour or more. Sometimes it's good for me, I can just go do what I want, but sometimes it's an abhorrent interruption that pisses me off. Her mum is a great person, apart from constanty sucking air through her teeth and taking millions of photos of every meal, or everything we ever do together. Im really trying to lay off the facebook crap and live lie in the minute but **** me who needs another photo of another meal, who gives a shit.
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That was the predominate reason behind my parents' divorce. My mum hated my dad's mother with a passion. Mum agreed to move back to Victoria on the proviso they lived in a different town to my nana, and that father stood up for her against my nana. The latter didn't come to fruition which inevitably caused their break up.

At least that's what mum told me..
 

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