Don't work for Hutchy
http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/c...exploiting-young-workers-20150129-131a60.html
Help a journo out
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Don't work for Hutchy
http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/c...exploiting-young-workers-20150129-131a60.html
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OP should post this in the Bay
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You write under your real name. That puts you a step ahead of most The Roar wannabes.
"Written"
Stopped reading after the grammar error in the first sentence
Just kidding mate, good luck with it. Will have a read when I get a chance.
billy fragos
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You have some nice ideas, although you need to improve your writing.
Sorry mate but I stopped reading when I read what you 'wrote' ......I mean .....'had written' in the first sentence of your post.
thetradesman
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No I'm currently at school, secondary.
sataris
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Most have touched on the wrote/written mistake in your original post. Whilst it seems minor any editor or sub-editor you end up working for will tell you to rewrite it.
Try reading your articles out loud and see if it sounds right. This is an exercise my editor told me after having read one of my worst submissions.
Try reading your articles out loud and see if it sounds right. This is an exercise my editor told me after having read one of my worst submissions.
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Sound advice
...Usually if it sounds wrong, then it is wrong...A good ear is every bit as important as an eye for detail or an angle for a story.
Your writing reads like a teenage BigFooty poster's. I guess that's around your mark right now.
You're still in high school, right? Pester your English teachers for advice and feedback on your content, I'm sure they'd be more than willing and you get that face to face feedback, unlike posting a thread on BigFooty.
Learning the little things like being able to deliver a message clearly and coherently without woffing on will come with practice and feedback, and the more you watch games the better you can make judgements if you're writing about footy or whatever. Reading your previews, I notice that there's a lot of vague opinions on players, like 'Mitch Duncan is a very underrated player in the league for what he provides to his team and is still developing. Josh Caddy is also underrated. Caddy seems to play well in big games which is a big asset to his game.' This is providing the reader absolutely nothing and reads like rehashed forum filler. Why are they underrated? What does Mitch Duncan provide? Perhaps try to focus on things you have first hand knowledge about.
Read the news as well, it'll help you get a grip on what an article should look like.
You're still in high school, right? Pester your English teachers for advice and feedback on your content, I'm sure they'd be more than willing and you get that face to face feedback, unlike posting a thread on BigFooty.
Learning the little things like being able to deliver a message clearly and coherently without woffing on will come with practice and feedback, and the more you watch games the better you can make judgements if you're writing about footy or whatever. Reading your previews, I notice that there's a lot of vague opinions on players, like 'Mitch Duncan is a very underrated player in the league for what he provides to his team and is still developing. Josh Caddy is also underrated. Caddy seems to play well in big games which is a big asset to his game.' This is providing the reader absolutely nothing and reads like rehashed forum filler. Why are they underrated? What does Mitch Duncan provide? Perhaps try to focus on things you have first hand knowledge about.
Read the news as well, it'll help you get a grip on what an article should look like.
I've been told that sub editor positions are becoming more and more scarce, so knowing how to spell and punctuate is important for versatility.
Noobz0r
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Pester your English teacher for advice, particularly about writing more formally and using better grammar. Practice. Even on BigFooty, write as formally as possible. Get good grades, and good enough ATAR for a journalism course. Work your arse off in university. Be prepared to take a rural or minor job at first, it's hard to get your foot in the door as a journalist. Work hard, say yes to everything. Be prepared to take years to specialise as a sports journalist.
Actually that raises a good point Noobz.
Vest yourself in current affairs, learn about the world around you and be versatile in your writing, instead of pigeonholing yourself into sports writing.
Vest yourself in current affairs, learn about the world around you and be versatile in your writing, instead of pigeonholing yourself into sports writing.
Noobz0r
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Very good. Watch programs like Four Corners and Q&A.
BlakeyNoFlakey
Brownlow Medallist
The Geelong article had a few errors. Nobody really calls Tom Hawkins "Hulk", he's known as Tomahawk mostly, TBone sometimes. Tom Read is an 18yo rookie, there's no way he'll play in the seniors this season, or probably next (barring catastrophic injuries). So mentioning him as a potential ruckman for 2015 shows a lack of real footy knowledge. Talking up our midfield when we've finished second bottom for clearances for the last 4 years shows a lack of research too.
Writing a journalistic article requires you research your topic much better, your article reads like a forum post.
Writing a journalistic article requires you research your topic much better, your article reads like a forum post.
For the Collingwood article:
- The first phrase adds little, so I'd delete it. You should make the point of your article clear at the start then fill in the details after.
- Don't be scared to use the normal or right word. Sports writers love their catch phrases, but these phrases often come off as an annoying admiration of their own reflection.
- Don't be scared to just say it. Use adjectives and adverbs where you need them, but don't be overly descriptive about peripheral things. The less you use adjectives the more impact they have when you use them.
I'd go something like:
Just four years ago Collingwood were playing in grand finals. They had a young midfield who were expected to dominate for the next six to seven years. But this has not happened.
Since Nathan Buckley took over as head coach...
- The first phrase adds little, so I'd delete it. You should make the point of your article clear at the start then fill in the details after.
- Don't be scared to use the normal or right word. Sports writers love their catch phrases, but these phrases often come off as an annoying admiration of their own reflection.
- Don't be scared to just say it. Use adjectives and adverbs where you need them, but don't be overly descriptive about peripheral things. The less you use adjectives the more impact they have when you use them.
I'd go something like:
Just four years ago Collingwood were playing in grand finals. They had a young midfield who were expected to dominate for the next six to seven years. But this has not happened.
Since Nathan Buckley took over as head coach...
Keep at it. Aside from writing practice, I'd get in as much reading practice as you can too. Best way to experience great writing is to immerse yourself in it. Get a feel for the flow of language, and pick the best examples of sports writing you can find and see how they do it.
Good luck. If you're impartial, well-written and objective, you'll already be above quite a few 'professionals'. Whether there will be demand for it is another matter.
thetradesman
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http://www.theroar.com.au/2015/04/14/richmond-suffering-from-a-lack-of-leadership/
Hey guys!
Have done another article, would appreciate feedback!
Hey guys!
Have done another article, would appreciate feedback!
WALDENPOND
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Well done for asking for opinions and advice. A lot of aspiring writers are very precious about what they do. Especially at the beginning of their career.
I'm not shrewd enough to offer an opinion other than maybe there was not enough meat on the bone when it came to the very short paragraphs. For example when writing about how Maric should be captain, if it's an opinion piece give your in depth opinion why he should be. Having said that I'm not sure how long the piece can be.
As for advice. Read! Writing courses clearly can help. But read everything you can especially by writers you admire whether they are sports journalists or classic novelists. Even something written on a restaurant menu or graffiti on a wall could inspire a turn of phrase or other ideas. Also rewriting other journalists work for practice, even by hand so it sinks in more will help mould your style. As they say, practice makes perfect.
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well done on having a go, much more than many do, and more kudos for putting your work out there to be critiqued.
a couple of points in this one. i'm not a Richmond fan, but that is pretty harsh on Cotchin. I see what you are trying to say overall about their leadership but a bold statement like that really needs figures or more to support it. much the same for deledio - there is a point in what you are saying, but that is a very sweeping statement at this stage of your writing.
the writing flows reasonably well, but after making a number of bold statements, you then finish by saying "how do you fix it? I have no idea". This defeats the point in some ways of the article. a lot of ideas put out there to provoke discussion without a real solution - it sounds like a bloke wandering into a bar, starting an argument and then walking off. offer some solutions to get the reader thinking, otherwise it gets dismissed as a rant from an opposition supporter.
all in all though, don't give up - take the feedback from all on here, and others you show this to, on board and work through it all as a learning experience, and keep grafting away. all writers started somewhere and made plenty of blues along the way, but learnt from them.
a couple of points in this one. i'm not a Richmond fan, but that is pretty harsh on Cotchin. I see what you are trying to say overall about their leadership but a bold statement like that really needs figures or more to support it. much the same for deledio - there is a point in what you are saying, but that is a very sweeping statement at this stage of your writing.
the writing flows reasonably well, but after making a number of bold statements, you then finish by saying "how do you fix it? I have no idea". This defeats the point in some ways of the article. a lot of ideas put out there to provoke discussion without a real solution - it sounds like a bloke wandering into a bar, starting an argument and then walking off. offer some solutions to get the reader thinking, otherwise it gets dismissed as a rant from an opposition supporter.
all in all though, don't give up - take the feedback from all on here, and others you show this to, on board and work through it all as a learning experience, and keep grafting away. all writers started somewhere and made plenty of blues along the way, but learnt from them.
thetradesman
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thetradesman
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Hey guys, latest article here.
Thoughts?
Thoughts?
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Take out all references to "for mine" and your own thoughts. You want to be a journo? don't write like a blogger.
Nobody cares about the thoughts of some nameless journo. People care about the thoughts of people like Barrett, Wilson and Robbo (as much as they will say they don't care) because unlike you they have a name.
Nobody cares about the thoughts of some nameless journo. People care about the thoughts of people like Barrett, Wilson and Robbo (as much as they will say they don't care) because unlike you they have a name.
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