Drugs Are Bad Mackay?
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Present: Stephen Trigg (CEO), David Burtenshaw (Media & Communications), Phil Harper (Football Operations) and Neil Craig (Senior Coach)
Phil Harper: Righto guys, let’s get started. Just to keep things on track can you let me know the main issues you want to talk about today? Triggy, you first.
Stephen Trigg: I’d like us to look closely at our budgets. It’s looking like a real lean year financially. No prizemoney, no finals to host, falling crowds, less merchandise sales… it’s going to be tight. Some players are on big contracts that we might need to look at. Coaches too.
Neil Craig: I guess every club has one of these years occasionally?
Stephen Trigg: Sort of. No one’s holding you personally responsible though, Neil. So you don’t have anything to worry about. You’re not worried are you?
Neil Craig: Well… I wasn’t until just now. Should I be?
Stephen Trigg: No, no. There are some areas we will need to cut back on though. How’s that Toyota you’re driving?
Neil Craig: It’s great.
Stephen Trigg: It’s a bit big though isn’t it? You could probably use something smaller, more compact. More fuel efficient.
Neil Craig: No, I’m pretty happy with it.
Stephen Trigg: I’ll look into it for you, come back with a couple of options… anyway guys, we’re going to need to go over our budget with a fine tooth comb and cut back anything that’s superfluous.
Phil Harper: Like Irishmen?
David Burtenshaw: Hah!
Stephen Trigg: Good one, Phil. See? We’re saving money already!
Phil Harper: What about you David, what’s high on your agenda at the moment?
David Burtenshaw: Public perception of where we’re at. There’s no consistency. One minute we’ve got our best ever list and are gunning for the top four. Then we’re having wooden spoons waved at us by Port supporters. Now we’re talking finals again. We’re all over the place. Whilst this year has been an absolute rollercoaster we need to give the impression that everything is pretty much still going to plan and our over-arching strategy remains unchanged.
Phil Harper: Neil, what about you?
Neil Craig: Well… call me old fashioned but I was hoping we could talk about football. This is a Football Operations meeting isn’t it?
Phil Harper: Yes, we’ll probably give that a run at some stage.
David Burtenshaw: Just on the football, I’m really worried about finals.
Neil Craig: David, don't worry. Things are starting to turn. We’ve won three games in a row now-
David Burtenshaw: No, Neil. I’m worried about making the finals. We don’t want to be a club yo-yoing up and down the ladder. It’s too flukey… there’s no stability.
Neil Craig: So we should keep losing games for the sake of consistency?!
David Burtenshaw: If we win a string of games now people are going to start asking why we couldn’t win games at the start of the season when it counted.
Phil Harper: It’s a fair point, Neil… look at Port. Their fans don’t know what they’re going to deliver from one year to the next. Or one week to the next for that matter.
Neil Craig: Well, to be honest I have no idea what we’re going to dish up on the weekend either. The players are so hot and cold. Take Kurt Tippett for instance. He’s either nailing shots from fifty or kicking into the man. It’s an absolute lottery.
Stephen Trigg: Whose responsibility is it to improve his kicking?
Neil Craig: Well, David Noble is the forward line coach so technically it’s him. But in David’s defence, most of the players come to the game with a certain skill level and once you reach adulthood it’s very difficult to change your technique.
Stephen Trigg: Well, is there a cost saving there? If what you say is right and essentially we can’t help players develop their skills then do we need so many coaches?
Neil Craig: Hold on, I didn’t quite mean-
Stephen Trigg: We can let David go if he’s not having an impact can’t we? Don’t worry though, Neil. I won’t tell David that it was your idea to get rid of him.
Neil Craig: But it wasn’t my idea!
Stephen Trigg: That’s the spirit, that’s the line I’ll go with as well.
Neil Craig: Look… I still don’t understand why making the finals is a bad thing. It doesn’t make any sense.
Stephen Trigg: Neil, we cancelled all our September flights and hotel bookings remember? We’ll pay through the roof if we re-book now. Financially we’d be a lot better off if we don’t make the finals. Not to mention the extra match payments.
David Burtenshaw: And let’s face it, Neil. The one knock on you as a coach is your finals record. Why scramble to finish 8th only to get wiped off the field again? You’ll only have Rucci and his pack of vultures dredging up the same articles all over again. Publicity-wise it would be a lot better if we didn’t make the finals.
Neil Craig: I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Are we a football club? Surely a football club is in the business of winning football games.
Phil Harper: You really are old fashioned, Neil.
Neil Craig: If it’s all about saving money why are we buying 10,000 bloody waving towels this week?
Phil Harper: They’re called rally towels, Neil.
Neil Craig: Rally towels. I think I need one right now to wipe up the shit you guys are spouting-
Stephen Trigg: They actually didn’t cost much at all. We were getting some seating bay covers made up because of the falling crowds but the sponsorship fell through... Elders. Got a few issues at the moment… so we’ve just cut them up.
Phil Harper: They’ll look fantastic.
Neil Craig: (under breath) People can use them to wave goodbye to our season if you guys get your way.
(brief silence)
David Burtenshaw: Can we talk about the drug issue?
Neil Craig: Yes, I’m glad you mentioned that, David. The stuff that’s come out this week has been very eye-opening. I had no idea it was going on. At our club too?! It’s extremely worrying.
David Burtenshaw: Brisbane have really been copping some heat and they’ve damaged their brand. That footage of one of their trainers going around with a bucketful of no-doze tablets and giving them to players… that stuff really gives the club a bad name.
Stephen Trigg: It’s all legal though isn’t it?
David Burtenshaw: Yes, but it’s still terrible from a PR point of view.
Stephen Trigg: How do we make sure that doesn’t happen here?
David Burtenshaw: I think the best thing would be to make sure our doctors only distribute the drugs in the shower area.
Stephen Trigg: That’s clever. There are no cameras in there so it’s pretty safe.
Phil Harper: Problem solved.
Neil Craig: Hang on! That doesn’t solve it. The players would still be using drugs.
David Burtenshaw: Yes but Neil, I don’t think you’re following the problem. Were Brisbane getting criticised for drug use last season?
Neil Craig: No.
David Burtenshaw: Were their players using drugs last season?
Neil Craig: Yes.
David Burtenshaw: So the problem was that the public found out about it, not that the players were using drugs.
Neil Craig: Surely we don’t want our players using drugs at all, whether the public knows about it or not.
David Burtenshaw: I love your idealism, Neil, but we have to focus on the most important thing.
Neil Craig: The health and well-being of our players?
David Burtenshaw: No! Our image. We need our fans to love and respect our footy club. We need them to take up memberships, watch us on tv, buy merchandise… we need sponsors to want to be associated with our product and to take up corporate packages. At the moment as far as anyone is concerned, the players are as clean as Taylor Walker’s knees. And we need to keep it that way.
Stephen Trigg: The cameras are going to be right in our faces in the rooms from now on. They’ll be looking for this stuff. It’s better we control the distribution rather than banning drugs and forcing players to take them behind our backs. The risk of them getting caught is actually much higher that way.
Neil Craig: So we’re basically approving drug use?
Stephen Trigg: Why do you think we brought in Charlie Walsh in the first place?
(long silence)
Phil Harper: Shall we move on?
David Burtenshaw: Yes, let’s. Can we talk about your image, Neil? It’s actually very tricky to promote you positively.
Neil Craig: What do you mean… one of South Australia’s favourite footballing sons… a family man… positive win-loss record… have said I’m a one-club coach… what’s not to like?
David Burtenshaw: Well, you’re a real enigma. On the one hand you’re regarded as very science-oriented, cutting edge and up with all the modern trends. On the other hand you’re often perceived as old fashioned and… umm… what else did that focus group say? (checks notes) Outdated… behind-the-times… conservative.
Neil Craig: Well, if you’re just going to pick out the bad things they said. I’m sure there was some positive stuff?
Phil Harper: Actually there was heaps more negative stuff. (produces a page from his folder) Here we go. David actually made photocopies for everyone in the office. We’ve all been having a good chuckle.
Stephen Trigg: I got it as an email six times yesterday. Certainly doing the rounds.
Phil Harper: (reading) Stubbornly clinging to an obsolete game plan… Finicky and pedantic about team rules… Overly reliant on technical terminology… Highly-strung and tense in pressure situations… Relies on convoluted and complicated strategies that don’t work in the real world… Hang on… this is the wrong page…
Stephen Trigg: Isn’t that the feedback from the players?
Phil Harper: You’re right. Sorry. (searches through folder again)
Neil Craig: What do you mean feedback from the players? When did they-
Phil Harper: Here it is! This is the one from the focus groups. (reading) A boring, old scientist... Why can’t we get Paul Roos… He mumbles all the time… He never smiles…
Neil Craig: Thank you, Phil. That’s plenty.
Phil Harper: There’s heaps more here. It goes over the page. See? (reading) Why does he always walk so fast… I fall asleep whenever he speaks… I hate his hair…
Neil Craig: Can I stop you there, Phil? Thanks for the confidence booster but to be honest all I’m interested in is winning matches. I’m not trying to be popular or to make friends.
Phil Harper: Mission accomplished then.
David Burtenshaw: Neil, just back on promoting your image, there are a lot of contradictions. You get criticised for not making changes and reacting too slowly. And on the other hand you get praised for your consistency and your well-drilled sides.
Phil Harper: Not so much praise for that this year.
David Burtenshaw: No, that's true. Also, people hate your interviews. They complain that you give the same old answers over and over again. But then others say you’re one of the most open, refreshingly honest coaches there is, always courteous to the media. In all my years of PR I’ve never come across anything quite like it. You’re a cutting-edge conservative who makes snail-paced knee-jerk changes and who deals in sincerely guarded responses.
Stephen Trigg: That’s so true, David. I often here people say that Neil is dour, boring and no fun but then you ask the players and they all say he has a wicked sense of humour.
Neil Craig: Guilty as charged on that one I’m afraid! Check this out: A Buddhist goes into a burger place and says, “Make me one with everything.”
(Neil wets himself laughing)
Neil Craig: Oh man…will this hot streak ever end?
David Burtenshaw: The important thing, Neil, is that we showcase your human side. We need to play up your passions and emotions… show the fans that you feel what they feel.
Stephen Trigg: How do we do that?
David Burtenshaw: Well we just start with some little things. For example, it’s great for your image to be down on the bench, Neil. It really looks to the public like you’re close to the players and a part of the team. I think it’s a brilliant initiative of yours. It shows them you aren’t just some scientist up in the box pushing the buttons.
Neil Craig: (scornful) Initiative... the other coaches locked me out! Assholes. They said that I wasn’t listening to their ideas… does that sound like me? Well, Hart and Clarkey might have had a case, but the others… no chance. I listen to their stupid ideas all the time. Too often if anything. Tippett in the ruck… (rolls eyes)
David Burtenshaw: Well… down on the bench. It’s working isn’t it?
Neil Craig: Yeah, yeah. We’ve been winning games so I guess I’ll have to stay there. As soon as we lose one game though, I’ll be back up there in a flash.
David Burtenshaw: The only issue is that I noticed you wore a polo shirt down on the bench against Essendon. It was probably the coldest night in Adelaide’s history. Even something as simple as that can make you look to the public like an unfeeling robot.
Stephen Trigg: Just on that, we probably don’t need to get you the full tracksuit or fleece jacket do we if you’re not going to wear them? We can perhaps cut our clothing budget?
Neil Craig: I was f___ing freezing down there! Some smartarse ran my jumper up the 19th man flag pole. No prizes for guessing who. The pranks start up again as soon as I bring Jaenschy back into the team… hello? He’s lucky he’s kicking goals.
Stephen Trigg: Okay, we’ll keep the clothing I guess. Do we really need two travelling emergencies though? Especially when it’s in Perth.
Neil Craig: It’s important experience, Stephen. Being in amongst the team, seeing how they prepare… You can’t put a price on that.
Stephen Trigg: But can’t you do that the weeks when we’re in Adelaide? Saves us two plane tickets plus two nights accommodation.
Neil Craig: I’d hate to travel anywhere with the bare 22. You’re just asking for trouble. You never know when Bernie’s going to go on a bender and leave us one short.
Stephen Trigg: Well can we leave a couple of the assistant coaches behind? I mean… what does Bicks actually do down on the bench anyway?
Neil Craig: He holds my laptop for me.
Stephen Trigg: Can’t you just put it on the bench next to you?
Neil Craig: No, I’ve asked him to write down all my funny comments. I need him there. I can never remember half of them. Keep it under your hat but I’m actually putting together a book. It’s called “Neiling and Dealing.”
(brief silence)
Neil Craig: Well, I’m still working on the title. That was one of Bicks’ suggestions.
Phil Harper: So where are we at with all this? I’m not sure we’ve really got anywhere today.
Stephen Trigg: Well I guess the important thing is that from a financial point of view and from a publicity point of view, it’s very important that we don’t make the finals.
Neil Craig: So you want me to go out and lose matches?
Stephen Trigg: No… no. But let’s not mention finals if we can avoid it. If we end up sneaking in to the eight it will be a blow but we’ll deal with the negative fall out then.
(long silence)
Neil Craig: If we want to save money maybe we can cut back on some of the focus groups?
Phil Harper: Righto guys, let’s get started. Just to keep things on track can you let me know the main issues you want to talk about today? Triggy, you first.
Stephen Trigg: I’d like us to look closely at our budgets. It’s looking like a real lean year financially. No prizemoney, no finals to host, falling crowds, less merchandise sales… it’s going to be tight. Some players are on big contracts that we might need to look at. Coaches too.
Neil Craig: I guess every club has one of these years occasionally?
Stephen Trigg: Sort of. No one’s holding you personally responsible though, Neil. So you don’t have anything to worry about. You’re not worried are you?
Neil Craig: Well… I wasn’t until just now. Should I be?
Stephen Trigg: No, no. There are some areas we will need to cut back on though. How’s that Toyota you’re driving?
Neil Craig: It’s great.
Stephen Trigg: It’s a bit big though isn’t it? You could probably use something smaller, more compact. More fuel efficient.
Neil Craig: No, I’m pretty happy with it.
Stephen Trigg: I’ll look into it for you, come back with a couple of options… anyway guys, we’re going to need to go over our budget with a fine tooth comb and cut back anything that’s superfluous.
Phil Harper: Like Irishmen?
David Burtenshaw: Hah!
Stephen Trigg: Good one, Phil. See? We’re saving money already!
Phil Harper: What about you David, what’s high on your agenda at the moment?
David Burtenshaw: Public perception of where we’re at. There’s no consistency. One minute we’ve got our best ever list and are gunning for the top four. Then we’re having wooden spoons waved at us by Port supporters. Now we’re talking finals again. We’re all over the place. Whilst this year has been an absolute rollercoaster we need to give the impression that everything is pretty much still going to plan and our over-arching strategy remains unchanged.
Phil Harper: Neil, what about you?
Neil Craig: Well… call me old fashioned but I was hoping we could talk about football. This is a Football Operations meeting isn’t it?
Phil Harper: Yes, we’ll probably give that a run at some stage.
David Burtenshaw: Just on the football, I’m really worried about finals.
Neil Craig: David, don't worry. Things are starting to turn. We’ve won three games in a row now-
David Burtenshaw: No, Neil. I’m worried about making the finals. We don’t want to be a club yo-yoing up and down the ladder. It’s too flukey… there’s no stability.
Neil Craig: So we should keep losing games for the sake of consistency?!
David Burtenshaw: If we win a string of games now people are going to start asking why we couldn’t win games at the start of the season when it counted.
Phil Harper: It’s a fair point, Neil… look at Port. Their fans don’t know what they’re going to deliver from one year to the next. Or one week to the next for that matter.
Neil Craig: Well, to be honest I have no idea what we’re going to dish up on the weekend either. The players are so hot and cold. Take Kurt Tippett for instance. He’s either nailing shots from fifty or kicking into the man. It’s an absolute lottery.
Stephen Trigg: Whose responsibility is it to improve his kicking?
Neil Craig: Well, David Noble is the forward line coach so technically it’s him. But in David’s defence, most of the players come to the game with a certain skill level and once you reach adulthood it’s very difficult to change your technique.
Stephen Trigg: Well, is there a cost saving there? If what you say is right and essentially we can’t help players develop their skills then do we need so many coaches?
Neil Craig: Hold on, I didn’t quite mean-
Stephen Trigg: We can let David go if he’s not having an impact can’t we? Don’t worry though, Neil. I won’t tell David that it was your idea to get rid of him.
Neil Craig: But it wasn’t my idea!
Stephen Trigg: That’s the spirit, that’s the line I’ll go with as well.
Neil Craig: Look… I still don’t understand why making the finals is a bad thing. It doesn’t make any sense.
Stephen Trigg: Neil, we cancelled all our September flights and hotel bookings remember? We’ll pay through the roof if we re-book now. Financially we’d be a lot better off if we don’t make the finals. Not to mention the extra match payments.
David Burtenshaw: And let’s face it, Neil. The one knock on you as a coach is your finals record. Why scramble to finish 8th only to get wiped off the field again? You’ll only have Rucci and his pack of vultures dredging up the same articles all over again. Publicity-wise it would be a lot better if we didn’t make the finals.
Neil Craig: I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Are we a football club? Surely a football club is in the business of winning football games.
Phil Harper: You really are old fashioned, Neil.
Neil Craig: If it’s all about saving money why are we buying 10,000 bloody waving towels this week?
Phil Harper: They’re called rally towels, Neil.
Neil Craig: Rally towels. I think I need one right now to wipe up the shit you guys are spouting-
Stephen Trigg: They actually didn’t cost much at all. We were getting some seating bay covers made up because of the falling crowds but the sponsorship fell through... Elders. Got a few issues at the moment… so we’ve just cut them up.
Phil Harper: They’ll look fantastic.
Neil Craig: (under breath) People can use them to wave goodbye to our season if you guys get your way.
(brief silence)
David Burtenshaw: Can we talk about the drug issue?
Neil Craig: Yes, I’m glad you mentioned that, David. The stuff that’s come out this week has been very eye-opening. I had no idea it was going on. At our club too?! It’s extremely worrying.
David Burtenshaw: Brisbane have really been copping some heat and they’ve damaged their brand. That footage of one of their trainers going around with a bucketful of no-doze tablets and giving them to players… that stuff really gives the club a bad name.
Stephen Trigg: It’s all legal though isn’t it?
David Burtenshaw: Yes, but it’s still terrible from a PR point of view.
Stephen Trigg: How do we make sure that doesn’t happen here?
David Burtenshaw: I think the best thing would be to make sure our doctors only distribute the drugs in the shower area.
Stephen Trigg: That’s clever. There are no cameras in there so it’s pretty safe.
Phil Harper: Problem solved.
Neil Craig: Hang on! That doesn’t solve it. The players would still be using drugs.
David Burtenshaw: Yes but Neil, I don’t think you’re following the problem. Were Brisbane getting criticised for drug use last season?
Neil Craig: No.
David Burtenshaw: Were their players using drugs last season?
Neil Craig: Yes.
David Burtenshaw: So the problem was that the public found out about it, not that the players were using drugs.
Neil Craig: Surely we don’t want our players using drugs at all, whether the public knows about it or not.
David Burtenshaw: I love your idealism, Neil, but we have to focus on the most important thing.
Neil Craig: The health and well-being of our players?
David Burtenshaw: No! Our image. We need our fans to love and respect our footy club. We need them to take up memberships, watch us on tv, buy merchandise… we need sponsors to want to be associated with our product and to take up corporate packages. At the moment as far as anyone is concerned, the players are as clean as Taylor Walker’s knees. And we need to keep it that way.
Stephen Trigg: The cameras are going to be right in our faces in the rooms from now on. They’ll be looking for this stuff. It’s better we control the distribution rather than banning drugs and forcing players to take them behind our backs. The risk of them getting caught is actually much higher that way.
Neil Craig: So we’re basically approving drug use?
Stephen Trigg: Why do you think we brought in Charlie Walsh in the first place?
(long silence)
Phil Harper: Shall we move on?
David Burtenshaw: Yes, let’s. Can we talk about your image, Neil? It’s actually very tricky to promote you positively.
Neil Craig: What do you mean… one of South Australia’s favourite footballing sons… a family man… positive win-loss record… have said I’m a one-club coach… what’s not to like?
David Burtenshaw: Well, you’re a real enigma. On the one hand you’re regarded as very science-oriented, cutting edge and up with all the modern trends. On the other hand you’re often perceived as old fashioned and… umm… what else did that focus group say? (checks notes) Outdated… behind-the-times… conservative.
Neil Craig: Well, if you’re just going to pick out the bad things they said. I’m sure there was some positive stuff?
Phil Harper: Actually there was heaps more negative stuff. (produces a page from his folder) Here we go. David actually made photocopies for everyone in the office. We’ve all been having a good chuckle.
Stephen Trigg: I got it as an email six times yesterday. Certainly doing the rounds.
Phil Harper: (reading) Stubbornly clinging to an obsolete game plan… Finicky and pedantic about team rules… Overly reliant on technical terminology… Highly-strung and tense in pressure situations… Relies on convoluted and complicated strategies that don’t work in the real world… Hang on… this is the wrong page…
Stephen Trigg: Isn’t that the feedback from the players?
Phil Harper: You’re right. Sorry. (searches through folder again)
Neil Craig: What do you mean feedback from the players? When did they-
Phil Harper: Here it is! This is the one from the focus groups. (reading) A boring, old scientist... Why can’t we get Paul Roos… He mumbles all the time… He never smiles…
Neil Craig: Thank you, Phil. That’s plenty.
Phil Harper: There’s heaps more here. It goes over the page. See? (reading) Why does he always walk so fast… I fall asleep whenever he speaks… I hate his hair…
Neil Craig: Can I stop you there, Phil? Thanks for the confidence booster but to be honest all I’m interested in is winning matches. I’m not trying to be popular or to make friends.
Phil Harper: Mission accomplished then.
David Burtenshaw: Neil, just back on promoting your image, there are a lot of contradictions. You get criticised for not making changes and reacting too slowly. And on the other hand you get praised for your consistency and your well-drilled sides.
Phil Harper: Not so much praise for that this year.
David Burtenshaw: No, that's true. Also, people hate your interviews. They complain that you give the same old answers over and over again. But then others say you’re one of the most open, refreshingly honest coaches there is, always courteous to the media. In all my years of PR I’ve never come across anything quite like it. You’re a cutting-edge conservative who makes snail-paced knee-jerk changes and who deals in sincerely guarded responses.
Stephen Trigg: That’s so true, David. I often here people say that Neil is dour, boring and no fun but then you ask the players and they all say he has a wicked sense of humour.
Neil Craig: Guilty as charged on that one I’m afraid! Check this out: A Buddhist goes into a burger place and says, “Make me one with everything.”
(Neil wets himself laughing)
Neil Craig: Oh man…will this hot streak ever end?
David Burtenshaw: The important thing, Neil, is that we showcase your human side. We need to play up your passions and emotions… show the fans that you feel what they feel.
Stephen Trigg: How do we do that?
David Burtenshaw: Well we just start with some little things. For example, it’s great for your image to be down on the bench, Neil. It really looks to the public like you’re close to the players and a part of the team. I think it’s a brilliant initiative of yours. It shows them you aren’t just some scientist up in the box pushing the buttons.
Neil Craig: (scornful) Initiative... the other coaches locked me out! Assholes. They said that I wasn’t listening to their ideas… does that sound like me? Well, Hart and Clarkey might have had a case, but the others… no chance. I listen to their stupid ideas all the time. Too often if anything. Tippett in the ruck… (rolls eyes)
David Burtenshaw: Well… down on the bench. It’s working isn’t it?
Neil Craig: Yeah, yeah. We’ve been winning games so I guess I’ll have to stay there. As soon as we lose one game though, I’ll be back up there in a flash.
David Burtenshaw: The only issue is that I noticed you wore a polo shirt down on the bench against Essendon. It was probably the coldest night in Adelaide’s history. Even something as simple as that can make you look to the public like an unfeeling robot.
Stephen Trigg: Just on that, we probably don’t need to get you the full tracksuit or fleece jacket do we if you’re not going to wear them? We can perhaps cut our clothing budget?
Neil Craig: I was f___ing freezing down there! Some smartarse ran my jumper up the 19th man flag pole. No prizes for guessing who. The pranks start up again as soon as I bring Jaenschy back into the team… hello? He’s lucky he’s kicking goals.
Stephen Trigg: Okay, we’ll keep the clothing I guess. Do we really need two travelling emergencies though? Especially when it’s in Perth.
Neil Craig: It’s important experience, Stephen. Being in amongst the team, seeing how they prepare… You can’t put a price on that.
Stephen Trigg: But can’t you do that the weeks when we’re in Adelaide? Saves us two plane tickets plus two nights accommodation.
Neil Craig: I’d hate to travel anywhere with the bare 22. You’re just asking for trouble. You never know when Bernie’s going to go on a bender and leave us one short.
Stephen Trigg: Well can we leave a couple of the assistant coaches behind? I mean… what does Bicks actually do down on the bench anyway?
Neil Craig: He holds my laptop for me.
Stephen Trigg: Can’t you just put it on the bench next to you?
Neil Craig: No, I’ve asked him to write down all my funny comments. I need him there. I can never remember half of them. Keep it under your hat but I’m actually putting together a book. It’s called “Neiling and Dealing.”
(brief silence)
Neil Craig: Well, I’m still working on the title. That was one of Bicks’ suggestions.
Phil Harper: So where are we at with all this? I’m not sure we’ve really got anywhere today.
Stephen Trigg: Well I guess the important thing is that from a financial point of view and from a publicity point of view, it’s very important that we don’t make the finals.
Neil Craig: So you want me to go out and lose matches?
Stephen Trigg: No… no. But let’s not mention finals if we can avoid it. If we end up sneaking in to the eight it will be a blow but we’ll deal with the negative fall out then.
(long silence)
Neil Craig: If we want to save money maybe we can cut back on some of the focus groups?
Clean as Taylor Walker's knees funny stuff.
