Vintage Bay Mofra's Bottom 50 for 2023

Dinsdale · Dec 15, 2023

philreich said:
Deep sea divers with chicken pox - do they come up to scratch?

philreich · Dec 15, 2023

Elmer_Judd said:
Salutations to philreich

Reminds me of the bloke who says to his missus, "If I were to win the lottery, what would you do?"

She says, "I'd take half, and leave you."

He grins and says, "Well that's interesting, because I just won $12. Here's $6 - don't forget to write."

TubbsFarquhar · Dec 15, 2023

smish said:
Are BigFooty posters eligible for the bottom 50?

Sooz did a bottom 50 BF posters on her forum. I somehow made the top 10 and was called a Karen.

Saveloy Rockstar · Dec 15, 2023

Elmer_Judd said:
Salutations to philreich

Well the joke’s on you because they didn’t use US currency in Star Trek

So there!

Soggy2112 · Dec 15, 2023

Caligo said:
No I meant when he left Carlton to go to Adelaide. That was in his prime. He was 27 I think?

I agree his move back to Carlton was similar though.

Ah right, got confused as you were talking about those Hawks that left late in their careers.

Caligo · Dec 15, 2023

Soggy2112 said:
Ah right, got confused as you were talking about those Hawks that left late in their careers.

Yeah I think it was confusion all round.

Grand Uncle Horace · Dec 15, 2023

Dinsdale said:

lol… should be played on the scoreboard at the ~~Boer~~ Perth Stadium.

Those Hosties are so smart. No doubt they are rellos of Mitch Mere Marsh.

EskimoPAFC · Dec 15, 2023

Tom Jonas deservedly making the top 10 I see.

Mofra · Dec 15, 2023

Player 12 - Sam Weideman

10

Sam Weideman

Age
28

Ht

197cm

Wt
99kg

Pos.
Fwd

Career

Season

Last 5

D
9.6

2

K
4.7

2

HB
4.9

4

M
3.7

4

T
1.5

3

G
1.0

4

D
7.0

1

K
4.3

2

HB
2.8

2

M
3.8

4

T
0.5

1

G
1.8

5

D
9.2

3

K
3.6

2

HB
5.6

4

M
3.2

4

T
0.4

3

G
1.2

4

Pictured: Essendon number their lockers sequentially about as well as they keep records

Likes: People forgetting his family
Hates: Expectation

Sam Weideman is a former pick 9 who tried, and failed, multiple times at Melbourne. He ran out of chances, presumably because he tried to kick in some plaster but missed, and was traded in by Essendon at the end of 2022.

Sam keeps getting the 'developing forward' tag but he's actually 26 and a half. Did as change of scenery help him? Oh deary lordy Janelle no. He played 16 games at Essendon, for a return of 15 goals... 5 of which came in a shootout against Geelong in which Tom Hawkins kicked 8. Sam would play 7 games in a row without scoring a goal.... as a forward...... presumably, after coach Brad Scott declared that "from now on every game is like a final to us".

Brad actually defended Sam by saying "He's just trying to work in. He's at a new club, trying to fit in with a player he hasn't played with before in Peter Wright" which was a dirty lie because at that point he had actually played 2 games with '2 Metre Peter'. I didn't catch the rest of that interview but I think he blamed the a Marvel Stadium roof again.

Back to Sam. That return of 15 goals is the second best goal tally in his 8 year career, after managing 19 goals in 2020. As a full time KPF, he makes a decent back-up option to 5 better candidates which Essendon don't have. There literally was nobody else to play, so Sam ended up getting more undeserved opportunity this year than a Young Liberal with a well-connected lawyer father.
Sam apparently showed a bit of promise in defence at VFL level late in the year, in which Essendon has so much faith they decided to chase Ben McKay and make him the highest paid player in the competition next year. Essendon also targeted a forward at the draft, because their forwardline resembles a Supercoach auto-fill option on the 'budget' setting.

Fun fact: Sam's grandfather Murray is a Collingwood legend, playing 180 games and featured in 2 Premiership sides. His father Mark also played for Colllingwood, making the 'Weideman' name almost as famous at Collingwood as 'Daicos', 'Brown' or 'Defendant'.

Sam, Weeds, good luck in 2024 and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2023.

Elmer_Hauser · Dec 15, 2023

Mofra said:
Player 12 - Sam Weideman

Pictured: Essendon number their lockers sequentially about as well as they keep records

Likes: People forgetting his family
Hates: Expectation

Sam Weideman is a former pick 9 who tried, and failed, multiple times at Melbourne. He ran out of chances, presumably because he tried to kick in some plaster but missed, and was traded in by Essendon at the end of 2022.

Sam keeps getting the 'developing forward' tag but he's actually 26 and a half. Did as change of scenery help him? Oh deary lordy Janelle no. He played 16 games at Essendon, for a return of 15 goals... 5 of which came in a shootout against Geelong in which Tom Hawkins kicked 8. Sam would play 7 games in a row without scoring a goal.... as a forward...... presumably, after coach Brad Scott declared that "from now on every game is like a final to us".

Brad actually defended Sam by saying "He's just trying to work in. He's at a new club, trying to fit in with a player he hasn't played with before in Peter Wright" which was a dirty lie because at that point he had actually played 2 games with '2 Metre Peter'. I didn't catch the rest of that interview but I think he blamed the a Marvel Stadium roof again.

Back to Sam. That return of 15 goals is the second best goal tally in his 8 year career, after managing 19 goals in 2020. As a full time KPF, he makes a decent back-up option to 5 better candidates which Essendon don't have. There literally was nobody else to play, so Sam ended up getting more undeserved opportunity this year than a Young Liberal with a well-connected lawyer father.
Sam apparently showed a bit of promise in defence at VFL level late in the year, in which Essendon has so much faith they decided to chase Ben McKay and make him the highest paid player in the competition next year. Essendon also targeted a forward at the draft, because their forwardline resembles a Supercoach auto-fill option on the 'budget' setting.

Fun fact: Sam's grandfather Murray is a Collingwood legend, playing 180 games and featured in 2 Premiership sides. His father Mark also played for Colllingwood, making the 'Weideman' name almost as famous at Collingwood as 'Daicos', 'Brown' or 'Defendant'.

Sam, Weeds, good luck in 2024 and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2023.

Our late dear friend Maximum Grundage would be crying into his snowflakes about this latest entry...

Saveloy Rockstar · Dec 15, 2023

Pies dodged a bullet not getting him... and Richards

AlecDuncan · Dec 15, 2023

Dinsdale said:

DocT · Dec 15, 2023

Mofra said:
Player 12 - Sam Weideman

Pictured: Essendon number their lockers sequentially about as well as they keep records

Likes: People forgetting his family
Hates: Expectation

Sam Weideman is a former pick 9 who tried, and failed, multiple times at Melbourne. He ran out of chances, presumably because he tried to kick in some plaster but missed, and was traded in by Essendon at the end of 2022.

Sam keeps getting the 'developing forward' tag but he's actually 26 and a half. Did as change of scenery help him? Oh deary lordy Janelle no. He played 16 games at Essendon, for a return of 15 goals... 5 of which came in a shootout against Geelong in which Tom Hawkins kicked 8. Sam would play 7 games in a row without scoring a goal.... as a forward...... presumably, after coach Brad Scott declared that "from now on every game is like a final to us".

Brad actually defended Sam by saying "He's just trying to work in. He's at a new club, trying to fit in with a player he hasn't played with before in Peter Wright" which was a dirty lie because at that point he had actually played 2 games with '2 Metre Peter'. I didn't catch the rest of that interview but I think he blamed the a Marvel Stadium roof again.

Back to Sam. That return of 15 goals is the second best goal tally in his 8 year career, after managing 19 goals in 2020. As a full time KPF, he makes a decent back-up option to 5 better candidates which Essendon don't have. There literally was nobody else to play, so Sam ended up getting more undeserved opportunity this year than a Young Liberal with a well-connected lawyer father.
Sam apparently showed a bit of promise in defence at VFL level late in the year, in which Essendon has so much faith they decided to chase Ben McKay and make him the highest paid player in the competition next year. Essendon also targeted a forward at the draft, because their forwardline resembles a Supercoach auto-fill option on the 'budget' setting.

Fun fact: Sam's grandfather Murray is a Collingwood legend, playing 180 games and featured in 2 Premiership sides. His father Mark also played for Colllingwood, making the 'Weideman' name almost as famous at Collingwood as 'Daicos', 'Brown' or 'Defendant'.

Sam, Weeds, good luck in 2024 and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2023.

Fun fact: Sam's grandfather Murray is a Collingwood legend, playing 180 games and featured in 2 Premiership sides. His father Mark also played for Colllingwood, making the 'Weideman' name almost as famous at Collingwood as 'Daicos', 'Brown' or 'Defendant'.

MOFFFFFFFFF-RRRRAAAA, MOFFFFFFFFF-RRRRAAAA, MOFFFFFFFFF-RRRRAAAA,

Saveloy Rockstar · Dec 15, 2023

He could have said 'Premiership Player' instead of Defendant but then again he's a Dogs fan so... probably didn't occur to him

All Aust · Dec 15, 2023

Mofra said:
getting more undeserved opportunity this year than a Young Liberal with a well-connected lawyer father.

Allegedly......

Hi there.

WillHayward · Dec 16, 2023

Forgot about this bloke but Mofra is correct.
Worthy entry
Surely Essendon can find someone better?

philreich · Dec 16, 2023

Mofra said:
Player 12 - Sam Weideman

Pictured: Essendon number their lockers sequentially about as well as they keep records

Likes: People forgetting his family
Hates: Expectation

Sam Weideman is a former pick 9 who tried, and failed, multiple times at Melbourne. He ran out of chances, presumably because he tried to kick in some plaster but missed, and was traded in by Essendon at the end of 2022.

Sam keeps getting the 'developing forward' tag but he's actually 26 and a half. Did as change of scenery help him? Oh deary lordy Janelle no. He played 16 games at Essendon, for a return of 15 goals... 5 of which came in a shootout against Geelong in which Tom Hawkins kicked 8. Sam would play 7 games in a row without scoring a goal.... as a forward...... presumably, after coach Brad Scott declared that "from now on every game is like a final to us".

Brad actually defended Sam by saying "He's just trying to work in. He's at a new club, trying to fit in with a player he hasn't played with before in Peter Wright" which was a dirty lie because at that point he had actually played 2 games with '2 Metre Peter'. I didn't catch the rest of that interview but I think he blamed the a Marvel Stadium roof again.

Back to Sam. That return of 15 goals is the second best goal tally in his 8 year career, after managing 19 goals in 2020. As a full time KPF, he makes a decent back-up option to 5 better candidates which Essendon don't have. There literally was nobody else to play, so Sam ended up getting more undeserved opportunity this year than a Young Liberal with a well-connected lawyer father.
Sam apparently showed a bit of promise in defence at VFL level late in the year, in which Essendon has so much faith they decided to chase Ben McKay and make him the highest paid player in the competition next year. Essendon also targeted a forward at the draft, because their forwardline resembles a Supercoach auto-fill option on the 'budget' setting.

Fun fact: Sam's grandfather Murray is a Collingwood legend, playing 180 games and featured in 2 Premiership sides. His father Mark also played for Colllingwood, making the 'Weideman' name almost as famous at Collingwood as 'Daicos', 'Brown' or 'Defendant'.

Sam, Weeds, good luck in 2024 and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2023.

So basically you're saying that the Bombers need him as a forward about as much as a fish needs a bicycle?

krakouers · Dec 16, 2023

philreich said:
So basically you're saying that the Bombers need him as a forward about as much as a fish needs a bicycle?

A marlin star?

Mofra · Dec 16, 2023

Player 11 - Elliot Yeo

6

Elliot Yeo

Age
32

Ht

191cm

Wt
91kg

Pos.
Mid

Career

Season

Last 5

D
19.5

5

K
11.7

4

HB
7.8

5

M
4.6

4

T
4.5

5

CL
3.0

4

D
18.9

4

K
10.9

4

HB
8.0

4

M
2.1

2

T
5.8

5

CL
5.5

5

D
16.6

4

K
9.4

4

HB
7.2

5

M
3.6

4

T
0.6

3

CL
1.4

4

Pictured: Elliot mimes the experience of showering with NicNat

Likes: Perth
Hates: Brisbane

Elliot Yeo was a good player, back when West Coast won a flag. During those glory years he won two B&Fs, was in the AA side in 2017 & 2019 and was awarded 32 Brownlow votes across 2018 & 2019. Like West Coast, the UK Royal Family and the quality of my Tinder matches, Yeo's been in a steady decline ever since.

After a disasterous last season, Yeo entered 2023 determined to turn things around. He clearly did, 360 degrees.
West Coast "won" the spoon, and Yeo went backwards save for a 3 game patch. In those 3 rounds, Yeo picked up 80 touches as his team lost 3 games by a cumulative 356 points. West Coast were slightly less terrible for the rest of the season, unlike Yeo.
He just can't seem to do anything like he used to on a football field. A combination of age, injuries, form, and getting less support from his talentless hack teammates than a tissue paper jock strap provides all adds up to a sad sight of Yeo running around trying to re-live past glories, like a 47 year old staying at a backpackers.

Somehow, Elliot 'Over 28s nightclub' Yeo has a contract for next season despite his body showing all the reliability of Optus' Mobile Network. If he actually does anything on the field, it may force The West Australian to put something on their back page which isn't Harley Reid related (8 or 9 days in a row was it?)

Fun fact: Yeo was drafted by the Brisbane Lions and lasted two years there before he requested a trade home. In his first season at West Coast Yeo made the news in the UK for this photo in which Jarrad Witts tried to make Yeo look like a Collingwood supporter:

Pictured: Two teeth, one cup

Good luck next year Elliot, and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2023.

Dubai Quacker · Dec 16, 2023

Mofra said:
Player 10 - Elliot Yeo

Pictured: Elliot mimes the experience of showering with NicNat

Likes: Perth
Hates: Brisbane

Elliot Yeo was a good player, back when West Coast won a flag. During those glory years he won two B&Fs, was in the AA side in 2017 & 2019 and was awarded 32 Brownlow votes across 2018 & 2019. Like West Coast, the UK Royal Family and the quality of my Tinder matches, Yeo's been in a steady decline ever since.

After a disasterous last season, Yeo entered 2023 determined to turn things around. He clearly did, 360 degrees.
West Coast "won" the spoon, and Yeo went backwards save for a 3 game patch. In those 3 rounds, Yeo picked up 80 touches as his team lost 3 games by a cumulative 356 points. West Coast were slightly less terrible for the rest of the season, unlike Yeo.
He just can't seem to do anything like he used to on a football field. A combination of age, injuries, form, and getting less support from his talentless hack teammates than a tissue paper jock strap provides all adds up to a sad sight of Yeo running around trying to re-live past glories, like a 47 year old staying at a backpackers.

Somehow, Elliot 'Over 28s nightclub' Yeo has a contract for next season despite his body showing all the reliability of Optus' Mobile Network. If he actually does anything on the field, it may force The West Australian to put something on their back page which isn't Harley Reid related (8 or 9 days in a row was it?)

Fun fact: Yeo was drafted by the Brisbane Lions and lasted two years there before he requested a trade home. In his first season at West Coast Yeo made the news in the UK for this photo in which Jarrad Witts tried to make Yeo look like a Collingwood supporter:

Pictured: Two teeth, one cup

Good luck next year Elliot, and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2023.

West Coast in “steady decline”.

chortle

Mofra - ever the master of tactful understatement.

PT Bar None · Dec 16, 2023

Geez, player 11 must be a super-spud. Not even worthy of a post!

Quick, let the speculation commence who it was! Before Mofra edits the Yeo post and renumbers

Madas · Dec 17, 2023

PT Bar None said:
Geez, player 11 must be a super-spud. Not even worthy of a post!

Quick, let the speculation commence who it was! Before Mofra edits the Yeo post and renumbers

I’m speculating someone else from the Eagles ( for the next 10)

WillHayward · Dec 17, 2023

Mofra said:
Player 10 - Elliot Yeo

Pictured: Elliot mimes the experience of showering with NicNat

Likes: Perth
Hates: Brisbane

Elliot Yeo was a good player, back when West Coast won a flag. During those glory years he won two B&Fs, was in the AA side in 2017 & 2019 and was awarded 32 Brownlow votes across 2018 & 2019. Like West Coast, the UK Royal Family and the quality of my Tinder matches, Yeo's been in a steady decline ever since.

After a disasterous last season, Yeo entered 2023 determined to turn things around. He clearly did, 360 degrees.
West Coast "won" the spoon, and Yeo went backwards save for a 3 game patch. In those 3 rounds, Yeo picked up 80 touches as his team lost 3 games by a cumulative 356 points. West Coast were slightly less terrible for the rest of the season, unlike Yeo.
He just can't seem to do anything like he used to on a football field. A combination of age, injuries, form, and getting less support from his talentless hack teammates than a tissue paper jock strap provides all adds up to a sad sight of Yeo running around trying to re-live past glories, like a 47 year old staying at a backpackers.

Somehow, Elliot 'Over 28s nightclub' Yeo has a contract for next season despite his body showing all the reliability of Optus' Mobile Network. If he actually does anything on the field, it may force The West Australian to put something on their back page which isn't Harley Reid related (8 or 9 days in a row was it?)

Fun fact: Yeo was drafted by the Brisbane Lions and lasted two years there before he requested a trade home. In his first season at West Coast Yeo made the news in the UK for this photo in which Jarrad Witts tried to make Yeo look like a Collingwood supporter:

Pictured: Two teeth, one cup

Good luck next year Elliot, and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2023.

Make no mistake Mofra is in career best form.

So much to liike about this write up. Starting with the photo captions..

Grand Uncle Horace · Dec 17, 2023

Kudos to Mofra for not fat shaming Yeo, who infamously returned from injury with a verandah over his waistband.

With the retirement of NicNat, the human lard silo, Elliot is now the John Candy poster boy for player obesity.

If the body is the Temple metaphor can be stretched, then Elliot’s body is the true Temple of Doom.

krakouers · Dec 17, 2023

Grand Uncle Horace said:
Kudos to Mofra for not fat shaming Yeo, who infamously returned from injury with a verandah over his waistband.

With the retirement of NicNat, the human lard silo, Elliot is now the John Candy poster boy for player obesity.

If the body is the Temple metaphor can be stretched, then Elliot’s body is the true Temple of Doom.

They say my body is a temple, but I think it’s more like an amusement park – full of ups and downs!

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Vintage Bay Mofra's Bottom 50 for 2023

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