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Mega Thread The Random Thoughts Thread Part 1

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A business has a mission statement that is nothing but marketing fluff.

Who could have imagined that?
The company I work for paid some consultants mega bucks to come up with some "core values" posters. We now have posters all over the place with these grammatically incorrect and meaningless "slogans" that look like some 12 year old created them with a buzz word generator.
 

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The company I work for paid some consultants mega bucks to come up with some "core values" posters. We now have posters all over the place with these grammatically incorrect and meaningless "slogans" that look like some 12 year old created them with a buzz word generator.
Yes, it's a disease running out of control.

If an organisation needs to hire external consultants to tell it what its core values are, then it doesn't really have any.
 
The company I work for paid some consultants mega bucks to come up with some "core values" posters. We now have posters all over the place with these grammatically incorrect and meaningless "slogans" that look like some 12 year old created them with a buzz word generator.

committeesdemotivator.jpg
 
Will sell my year 11 business management textbook to any business desperate for coherent mission and vision statement, hmu

Only sell things once you don't need them anymore.
 
Yes, it's a disease running out of control.

If an organisation needs to hire external consultants to tell it what its core values are, then it doesn't really have any.
What is even worse is that the CEO who pushes these core values down everyones' throats doesn't even walk the walk. He is a Melbourne based Richmond supporter and he came over to give us a presentation not long after I first started with the company and he kept trying to make Portz Pawa supporter jokes. Things like "I've put plenty of pictures in this PowerPoint so that the Port Power supporters can understand it". I imagine he thought he was safe because all Souf Strayians are Crows supporters.

When he asked for questions I asked, "Can you explain how openly belittling a minority group of employees based on out dated and ignorant stereotypes fits with the company's core values?"

Apparently it is OK because Portz Pawa supporters are not a minority by race, colour, sexual preference or religious belief. :rolleyes:
 
What is even worse is that the CEO who pushes these core values down everyones' throats doesn't even walk the walk. He is a Melbourne based Richmond supporter and he came over to give us a presentation not long after I first started with the company and he kept trying to make Portz Pawa supporter jokes. Things like "I've put plenty of pictures in this PowerPoint so that the Port Power supporters can understand it". I imagine he thought he was safe because all Souf Strayians are Crows supporters.

When he asked for questions I asked, "Can you explain how openly belittling a minority group of employees based on out dated and ignorant stereotypes fits with the company's core values?"

Apparently it is OK because Portz Pawa supporters are not a minority by race, colour, sexual preference or religious belief. :rolleyes:
Pretty close to religion imo.
 
The company I work for paid some consultants mega bucks to come up with some "core values" posters. We now have posters all over the place with these grammatically incorrect and meaningless "slogans" that look like some 12 year old created them with a buzz word generator.

Do any of the posters contain the word "synergy"?
 
Had! But it does have some notable cameos, tho. Not sure how Cuba Gooding Jr. kept a straight face in his barbershop scene...

cuba-gooding-jr-coming-to-america.jpg

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comingtoamericatrading.jpg

Samuel L Jackson was a complete unknown at the time. A year later he'd be credited as 'Black Guy' in a paint-by-numbers Pacino cop thriller.

Be pretty funny if someone like Arsenio treated him like a pleb on set given their subsequent career trajectories.
 

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Well, the interview was interesting.

Definitely not a company I want to work for. First impressions were genuinely awful, the workplace is a ******* construction site, and they moved to the new premises over three months ago. There was shit everywhere and they didn't even have a front desk. You walk out of the lift and you are greeted by quite literally an OH&S violation with ladders, cables, ducting and floorboards all stacked up on bare concrete. The roof tiles weren't even on.

I HAD TO PRESS A CHEAP OFF THE SHELF DOORBELL STUCK TO A WHITEBOARD THAT SAID WRITTEN IN RED TEXTA "PRESS DOORBELL FOR SERVICE"!

No. Just no.
But you are unemployed and a right winger.

Surely you are supposed to take every job offered to you so as not to one day be a burden on society.
 

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Rafa2Newcastle

The man does have experience working with a shoestring budget and shit owners.

tribey

I would choc my jocks if this happened.

Grinds my gears seeing Tottenham getting their shit together, let alone what Leicester are doing, and hearing assorted media-types scoffing at 'sacked in the morning/Steve McClaren he's taking us down' while bigging-up Alan Pardew (whose career at Palace is panning out as it always does), as if Newcastle fans are delusional to expect a club of our stature to be halfway competitive against Bournemouth at home.
 
I have been too ashamed to ask this but here goes............................................. Who is Poo Eckhert :oops::oops::oops:
 
I would choc my jocks if this happened.

Grinds my gears seeing Tottenham getting their shit together, let alone what Leicester are doing, and hearing assorted media-types scoffing at 'sacked in the morning/Steve McClaren he's taking us down' while bigging-up Alan Pardew (whose career at Palace is panning out as it always does), as if Newcastle fans are delusional to expect a club of our stature to be halfway competitive against Bournemouth at home.

and herein lies Newcastle's problem.

They haven't won the league since the Wall Street crash, but believe they are a big club because they have great attendances. It has built a sense of entitlement that prevents them doing better.
 
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