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Over The Post said:
It certainly didn't to me at the time. Maybe some underlying insecurity beneath all the surface anything-goes bravado. She had no problem sharing other women's men.

I felt... shortchanged. Talk about bait and switch.
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I still dont get it.

She rings George- a man- to have a threesome. He's a man.
 
revo333 said:
I've been ghosted more than I have done the ghosting.

I think it's fine to do on a dating app to people you don't plan to meet in real life.

Doing it to someone you have meet a few times, not so fine.

I just don't understand why people will leave your message hanging for weeks and not unmatch you instead.
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Kinda similar when you go for a job interview.

Fair enough if you dont hear anything back if its just an online application. But if you go in, face to face and have an interview and are ghosted?

Bull shit. And I wish I called the ones out who did it tbh.
/got a job now so I cgaf.
 

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Shell said:
Weirdo.
And a threesome tease.
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Yes, Owen had it right. Not wanting to share "her" men with her girlfriends, but had zero qualms about them sharing their partners with her.

And yes, she was very much a manipulative weirdo narcissist with more issues than anyone could count. Unfortunately I was in a very vulnerable place and an ideal victim.
 
Over The Post said:
Yes, Owen had it right. Not wanting to share "her" men with her girlfriends, but had zero qualms about them sharing their partners with her.

And yes, she was very much a manipulative weirdo narcissist with more issues than anyone could count. Unfortunately I was in a very vulnerable place and an ideal victim.
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Ooooh. I understand now. I thought that meant to read "women".

But you mean when she has a threesome with another chick, its gotta be a random man. Not her bf/SO male.
 
Over The Post said:
Yes, Owen had it right. Not wanting to share "her" men with her girlfriends, but had zero qualms about them sharing their partners with her.

And yes, she was very much a manipulative weirdo narcissist with more issues than anyone could count. Unfortunately I was in a very vulnerable place and an ideal victim.
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Did you meet her on Tinder?
 
On a more serious note, I'm dealing with women in an older age bracket (if you're going to use labels, "mature" rather than "milf") and so far every one I've dated - even the just-one-date ones - are victims of abuse, some of which has left me horrified and wondering how the hell to deal with it when (if) things get intimate.

I'm so conscious of avoiding boundaries and doing anything to trigger bad memories, and so concerned with helping them feel safe with me, that my restraint and self-control has been picked up as disinterest or timidity. My last overnight was described as "just not confident" and she's right. I wasn't.

I'm not confident dealing with someone who has been traumatised and treated as an object her whole life (including recently on the dating scene). Equally they have no idea how to deal with someone who is gentle and controlled and lets them dictate the pace.

Is this something others are experiencing? Just my age group? Just being unlucky?
 

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It's been a few months, but I was chatting today to someone who was mighty fine but visiting town and leaving tomorrow. We began setting up plans for tonight - they aren't a regular visitor, so tonight was really the only opportunity for anything to happen.

Then I remembered - I went to the doctor on Monday and was diagnosed with shingles. Thankfully it's just a patch on my torso under my ribs, and while extremely painful earlier in the week, it has now mostly scabbed over and is now causing me minimal issues. Except now - as it's still very visible, a big scabby rash on my body.

I asked a good friend, who said that they thought I needed to say something, because if they were having sexy times and saw a rash like mine on the person, it would be a mood killer. So I tried to mention it as non-chalantly as possible, but alas the conversation appears to have ended. My tale of woe.
 
Okay, so I thought to finally try to like venture out to find someone my age.

I find I cute guy, goes for north, we have a lot of things in common. I message him first he gets back and don’t hear from him in a day (didn’t take any notice) and then he gets back to me asking for my snap.

We talk a lot on snap, especially cause I’m in iso atm, for like 5 days straight, snapping a lot in the morning and less in the evening because he is on a trip with his mates, like that’s fine and all.

and cut to now where I’m currently on delivered for a day. Like I know it’s not a big deal to some of you but it just tells me that you are just choosing to ignore me like if you don’t find me interesting or your not interested in me like have the decency to tell me and not just air me while I can clearly see your online.
 
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Over The Post said:
On a more serious note, I'm dealing with women in an older age bracket (if you're going to use labels, "mature" rather than "milf") and so far every one I've dated - even the just-one-date ones - are victims of abuse, some of which has left me horrified and wondering how the hell to deal with it when (if) things get intimate.

I'm so conscious of avoiding boundaries and doing anything to trigger bad memories, and so concerned with helping them feel safe with me, that my restraint and self-control has been picked up as disinterest or timidity. My last overnight was described as "just not confident" and she's right. I wasn't.

I'm not confident dealing with someone who has been traumatised and treated as an object her whole life (including recently on the dating scene). Equally they have no idea how to deal with someone who is gentle and controlled and lets them dictate the pace.

Is this something others are experiencing? Just my age group? Just being unlucky?
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I dont think youre unlucky. There are a lot of broken people around. People who stayed in relationships far too long "for the kids" and end up in their 40s and dating for the first time in decades.

Just remember youre not saving them and dont owe them anything and arent responsible for what theyve been through. Just be a decent person.
 

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Shell said:
Kinda similar when you go for a job interview.

Fair enough if you dont hear anything back if its just an online application. But if you go in, face to face and have an interview and are ghosted?

Bull sh*t. And I wish I called the ones out who did it tbh.
/got a job now so I cgaf.
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Very similar. It's all about the return on investment.

Takes 2 seconds to (figuratively) drop a CV into the pile and if yours isn't one of the 5 they read out of 200 then so be it.

Doesn't take 2 seconds to jump through hoops for an online application process that wants every piece of information on your CV separately and your CV. Used to shit me to tears writing cover letters and preparing application information tailored to the position on offer to get doughnuts. Even worse when you are physically interviewing and talking with potential colleagues, about salary expectations etc. and then at best you get a generic 'you were not successful' email a month later. Like dating it's all about who has the power/options. Right now businesses that dick people around making them cross every t and dot every i just to get a look in are missing out on good people because it's an employees' market.

Each to their own but I think it's ruder to ghost someone on a dating app mid conversation that is going somewhere than after meeting them and it going nowhere. I've been on dates where getting any conversation going is like drawing blood from a stone, so if I never heard from a girl after that no biggie. On the flip side if I have been talking to someone for a week or so (not always practical to exchange a few messages then meet) and getting to know the person and they ghost/delete me I think that's a major dick move.
 
AFDogs said:
Nearly fell off my chair the other night. Was approached by a very attractive girl who said 'I'm just gonna shoot my shot, you're cute can I have your number?' I respected it heaps. We ended up hooking up, was a good night.

Real life Tinder. I think that's the way of the future for me.
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And.... what happened? Will you see her again?
 
Deliverance said:
Playing petty games to mess with someone emotionally. Solid way to start a relationship. 🙄
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sOliD WAy tO sTaRT a RElaTiOnShip.

Get your head out of your arse and learn how to take a joke.
 
Shell said:
She's young. She'll grow out of it.
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Grow out of what? Y’all make bare assumptions and if you read my post you could tell I was head over heals for him so I bet you I replied instantly.
 
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