Things you have done off camera

[BEEG]

Dropped ice cream down my leg once the dog ran into the room he licked it all off the dog enjoyed it and so did i

 

[Impunity!]

I assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand as an awesome prank but they blamed the bloke next to me and it started a bloody land war that claimed millions of casualties.

* 'em if they can't take a joke

 

[Quivorir]

No you didn't. You ******* liar.

 

[Doss]

I remember once I was at cricket practice and I nailed a lofted straight drive like I'd never nailed one before or since. Middled and right in the sweet spot, and it was off the fastest bowler in the side.

The ball went the proverbial mile and in fact slammed into a wall a very long way away. I wish it'd been filmed.

 

[X_box_X]

Did you not just contribute?

 

[little graham]

Did you not just contribute?

Did you get it on camera?

 

[Stratton_Gun]

A mate of mine got a hot date with a divorced woman once, she sent him suggestive text messages regarding sex. Turns out she has a physical handicap.

Any of you blokes ****d a bird in a wheelchair ?

 

[Mancey]

I pissed on the steering wheel of my bus and was forced to walk home like a campaigner

 

[peppy la pew]

My car got a flat tyre one day and because I am ' lets say mentally handicapped ' I can't change a tyre.

So I rang the RACV and they made me pay for a new membership, what a useless campaigner I am.

 

[Mancey]

My car got a flat tyre one day and because I am ' lets say mentally handicapped ' I can't change a tyre.

So I rang the RACV and they made me pay for a new membership, what a useless campaigner I am.

And then tried to claim you had sex with your cousin

 

[Simple Jack]

Another cricket one:

In under 12s or something I was keeping up to the stumps to our offie, he bowled a wide one that turned back quite a bit and the batsman (RH) went to play a cut. I stayed down a bit too much, just sort of had the gloves out there, he under edged it straight down into them and it somehow stuck. Poor guy couldn't believe it. Neither could I. It would have been ******* sensational to have a vid of.

 

[Michaels]

another cricket one

would of been 5-6 years ago now playing C grade, captain asked me to go field in close cause i was one of the youngest on the team which meant i may of had been reaction times. so im standing around 2-3m from the batsman on the legside. bowler was a slow/medium swing bowler, decided to drop one in short (not on purpose), saw the guy rock back, he hit the absolute cover off it and i stuck up the right hand (opposite hand) and caught it.

plenty of other moments during school / mucking around with mates with things like kicking a footy full court into a basketball ring, chipping a golf ball into a bucket, kicking boundary line goals in footy etc.

typically was known as that guy who would pull bullshit out of his ass

 

[Scotland]

I assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand as an awesome prank but they blamed the bloke next to me and it started a bloody land war that claimed millions of casualties.

**** 'em if they can't take a joke

False.

There was definitely an ostrich involved.

 

[peppy la pew]

And then tried to claim you had sex with your cousin

And what's wrong with that, over in Serbia it is normal practice. Bitch went on facebook and told everyone so she's off the xmas list.

I usually hang around seedy bars and clubs at closing time, 'cause most of the bishes are legless by then and easy to pick up.

 

[blueboy25]

This one time at band camp....

 

[Xtreme]

In primary school a friend of mine did what Andrew gaze does at the end of the video:



Did it on his first go, would have been epic to record it.

 

[Mancey]

I regularly pick up hot ass in spotlight

 

[Ahern2Boof]

Playing tennis one day (singles), ball was hit over my head at the net to the baseline, ran back, was holding the racquet in a pretty unorthodox position for some reason, swung it straight up in backhand fashion over my head (rather than hitting 'under it', ala forehand, if you know what I mean). Ball spent ages in the air, before pin-dropping right on top of the net, killing any momentum it had and rolling over onto the opposition's side of the court.

Got a few golf claps from a few that were watching.

 

[Ahern2Boof]

Also, in PE one day we were playing basketball and one kid was mocking one of the sporty kids (the ones that treat PE like the Olympics), and from half-court, he said something like "oh look at me, i'm sporty kid!" before lobbing the ball around his shoulder.

Of course, the ball went straight through the ring.

 

[Stratton_Gun]

I got a near half court shot after the buzzer playing U/12's bball. We were already winning so it didn't make a difference but still......

 

[Illinois Nazi]

I've won a couple of hockey finals on penalties (I'm a goalkeeper) that I wouldn't mind having on video.

 

[Hoffy95]

Guzzled a litre of raw milk a week ago and here I am to tell the tale with no ill side effects.

Shame no one will believe me.

 

[The_Reaper]

Some people hate you SG but stuff like this is so good it's gotta be self-aware

We also had a girl from the poor cousin high school up town. Lass had made friends with a Rexona can.

We had a kid get in trouble with "the po po" as you so elegantly put it as well.

Times.

Happened when I was in highschool. Around 2006. There was a video of a girl the year below fingering herself going around.

It went to other schools in Perth. The Applecross school girl

 

[Wayne Arnold]

I assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand as an awesome prank but they blamed the bloke next to me and it started a bloody land war that claimed millions of casualties.

**** 'em if they can't take a joke

I think I may have found photographic evidence which verifies your story. I was not aware that you are dirty as well as being vertically challenged. Congrats on overcoming such disabilities to achieve what you have thus far in life.

 

[Hoffy95]

Where am I looking? Not the bloke with the rubber band gun?