Bullying

[ben.carbonaro]

I know some of you might feel bad it, but thought it might be a good idea to talk about this issue which does get high levels of media coverage at various times. It's always good to get things off your chest and bullying is one of them.

Does anyone have any stories or experiences they would like to share ?

Does anyone out there think bullying can be simply avoided or is it a serious problem ?

 

[rizzo]

Bullying is a serious problem and every kid is affected by it directly or indirectly

 

[Thrawn]

Does anyone out there think bullying can be simply avoided or is it a serious problem ?

Usually teachers and parents say that bullies should be "ignored". Well, it's not that easy. The only way to stop them is to fight back. When I was in grade 5 there were a bunch of kids that picked on me for no reason (or perhaps because I was a small kid back then - they always picked on the smaller types but I was pretty strong for my age). Then on the oval at lunchtime I encountered the group and told them I had enough. In other words, I was thirsty for blood - I grabbed the "ring-leader" whose name was James, a fat kid who was slightly bigger than me, put him in a headlock and punched him in the guts several times. Hard. His 'followers' were gobsmacked and froze like a deer looking at headlights. Obviously they didn't want a piece of me (or a piece of them ripped off, so to speak)

He cried like a sissy girl and ran away. Of course a teacher had to be walking past when this happened - but the principal didn't give a **** because this kid had a history of bullying other kids. And he knew that we weren't getting along. From that day on they never picked on me again, in fact his group were very friendly to be but James avoided me whenever humanly possible. He shat his pants everytime he saw me, I swear.

Bottom line is, ignoring the problem will only make it worse as it with most problems with life.

 

[mansize rooster]

Originally posted by Thrawn
Usually teachers and parents say that bullies should be "ignored". Well, it's not that easy. The only way to stop them is to fight back. When I was in grade 5 there were a bunch of kids that picked on me for no reason (or perhaps because I was a small kid back then - they always picked on the smaller types but I was pretty strong for my age). Then on the oval at lunchtime I encountered the group and told them I had enough. In other words, I was thirsty for blood - I grabbed the "ring-leader" whose name was James, a fat kid who was slightly bigger than me, put him in a headlock and punched him in the guts several times. Hard. His 'followers' were gobsmacked and froze like a deer looking at headlights. Obviously they didn't want a piece of me (or a piece of them ripped off, so to speak)

He cried like a sissy girl and ran away. Of course a teacher had to be walking past when this happened - but the principal didn't give a **** because this kid had a history of bullying other kids. And he knew that we weren't getting along. From that day on they never picked on me again, in fact his group were very friendly to be but James avoided me whenever humanly possible. He shat his pants everytime he saw me, I swear.

Bottom line is, ignoring the problem will only make it worse as it with most problems with life.

good onya
somtimes that stuff just has to be done..but unfortunatly for others they find it realy hard to stick up for themselves.

 

[Nic]

Can't say bullying was overly prevalent at my school ... at least not right under my nose. There was the occasional tosser/bitch who'd abuse someone behind their back - or to their face - but they'd just cop it back, be it verbal or physical.

 

[robbieando]

Usually teachers and parents say that bullies should be "ignored". Well, it's not that easy. The only way to stop them is to fight back.

I agree with that. Sure its easy to ignore someone, but you can't do so forever. Thats why fighting back is a good idea, however you can't fight everytime you are picked on, otherwise you become known as an easy target.

 

[rizzo]

easiest way to fight back is to be spontanious (sp?) give them back what they give to you even if it is physical

 

[MonkeyButterer]

i also experienced some bullying at school.

This one time, when i was in Yr 12, this year 7 chick walked by and kinda, you know, like, looked at me, and stuff....so i threw down a few hooks and jabs, switched to kicking when she hit the ground, and stole her lunch money.

Ok, so that isn't true, but i think both sides of the issue should get an airing.

 

[Blues4Life]

It's a tough one because every bullying situation is slightly different and what would work in one situation could completely backfire in another. Standing up for oneself physically isn't always the greatest idea.

I think it's a very old fashioned philosophy that when the person been bullied stands up for themselves physically against the bully, then even if he doesnt win the fight he somehow gains the respect of everyone and the problem goes away.

Thrawn was obvisously physically competent to stand up for himself in that situation, but generally the kid been bullied is the smallest, weakest person with no friends to back him up. The bully would probably wipe the floor with him and nothing would change.

Ignoring it doesnt always work either. Perhaps getting a job, saving some money and ordering a couple of hits is the way to go.

 

[campbell]

One of my kids was bullied badly in Primary School years ago.We went to the school,nothing happened. In the end his Uncle pulled up to pick him up from school in front of the bullies on his Harley.My son jumped on the bike and took off,the bullies jaws dropped to the ground in envy.They toured the streets of our town for about an hour on the bike.

No more bullying.

 

[3rdEchelon]

Originally posted by Thrawn
Usually teachers and parents say that bullies should be "ignored". Well, it's not that easy. The only way to stop them is to fight back. When I was in grade 5 there were a bunch of kids that picked on me for no reason (or perhaps because I was a small kid back then - they always picked on the smaller types but I was pretty strong for my age). Then on the oval at lunchtime I encountered the group and told them I had enough. In other words, I was thirsty for blood - I grabbed the "ring-leader" whose name was James, a fat kid who was slightly bigger than me, put him in a headlock and punched him in the guts several times. Hard. His 'followers' were gobsmacked and froze like a deer looking at headlights. Obviously they didn't want a piece of me (or a piece of them ripped off, so to speak)

He cried like a sissy girl and ran away. Of course a teacher had to be walking past when this happened - but the principal didn't give a **** because this kid had a history of bullying other kids. And he knew that we weren't getting along. From that day on they never picked on me again, in fact his group were very friendly to be but James avoided me whenever humanly possible. He shat his pants everytime he saw me, I swear.

Bottom line is, ignoring the problem will only make it worse as it with most problems with life.

Very good Thrawn. This 'ignore the bully' is the biggest load of crap ever. You always have to fight fire with fire.

 

[Fullarton Power]

Bullying, like any form of violence, is only a problem because those in authority are too soft and will not mete out appropriate remediative measures.

 

[bunsen burner]

Originally posted by Blues4Life
I think it's a very old fashioned philosophy that when the person been bullied stands up for themselves physically against the bully, then even if he doesnt win the fight he somehow gains the respect of everyone and the problem goes away.

Old fashioned or not, it's usually the only thing that works.

Bullies prey on weak people. If that person doesn't fight back, the bully will keep going. Only when that person fights back will the bully move onto a weaker target.

When talking about fighting back, thowing a few defensive punches is no guarantee. You'd need to either take the iniative or use the element of surpise. Doing it in the vicinity of a teacher is a good idea - limits how much you get beaten up, and tells the bully you aren't scared of him or the teacher. Once you get hauled in front of the HM you mustn't dob and take the punishment on the chin. The bully will figure there are easier targets.

Thrawn was obvisously physically competent to stand up for himself in that situation, but generally the kid been bullied is the smallest, weakest person with no friends to back him up. The bully would probably wipe the floor with him and nothing would change.

Not true in most cases - provided you put in a decent attempt.

If you're real weak and the bully is real big: Go up to him while he's at the urinal and smash him in the jaw as hard as you can. While he's lying there with his knob in his hands p1ssing all over himself, kick the crap out of him. make sure you tell him if he messes with you again, you'll do the same again.

Ignoring it doesnt always work either.

This is the old fashioned way that seldom works. Countless women/mothers will preach this method because 'violence is wrong'. Violence maybe wrong, but it's a better option than being mentally disintegrated over time. The longer you don't fight back, the harder it becomes.

 

[bunsen burner]

Originally posted by Fullarton Power
Bullying, like any form of violence, is only a problem because those in authority are too soft and will not mete out appropriate remediative measures.

capital punishment?

I agree that teachers are too soft on bullies, but it won't solve the problem. I'll be teaching, if not insisting that my kids fight back physically if they are ever in this situation.

 

[Fullarton Power]

Originally posted by bunsen burner
capital punishment?

I agree that teachers are too soft on bullies, but it won't solve the problem. I'll be teaching, if not insisting that my kids fight back physically if they are ever in this situation.

Stopping violence at the lower levels with harsh, some would undoubtedly say draconian or barbaric, measures, would prevent such lowlifes growing up believing they can intimidateand manipulate people with threats to get their way.This is probably the single biggest problem with modern society; authority is too soft and takes too much of a devil may care attitude.

 

[yetsla]

You never know your doing it though...

When your at school you just pipe up & say stuff to people in public just messing around; I know I got myself in trouble a few times doing this - you don't realise what your doing!!

It was always non physical stuff at our school though... physical is different.

 

[P_D]

Being at an all-girls school, the greater proportion of bullying was of a relational manner - that is, the intentional manipulation of one's relationships to eitehr destroy a particular individual's social network, or to boost/expand their own social/peer network.

Pretty much what we've been advised in uni (dip.Ed) is to NEVER tell the victim to 'ignore it', and rather confront the bully in question, as the majority of bullies rely on an audience, so this is somewhat one way to use their audience against them in retaliation.

 

[bunsen burner]

Originally posted by Fullarton Power
Stopping violence at the lower levels with harsh, some would undoubtedly say draconian or barbaric, measures, would prevent such lowlifes growing up believing they can intimidateand manipulate people with threats to get their way.

I don't think you understand the concept of a bully.

1) Bullies aren't really about violence. It is about having a mental dominance. They often use violence to get this end result.
2) Bullies generally don't bully someone to get their way. It's more of a dominance thing.
3) Violent adults were not necessarily bullies as children.

This is probably the single biggest problem with modern society; authority is too soft and takes too much of a devil may care attitude.

Right-e-o then Fullerton_Hitler.

 

[Fullarton Power]

Originally posted by bunsen burner
I don't think you understand the concept of a bully.

1) Bullies aren't really about violence. It is about having a mental dominance. They often use violence to get this end result.
2) Bullies generally don't bully someone to get their way. It's more of a dominance thing.
3) Violent adults were not necessarily bullies as children.

Right-e-o then Fullerton_Hitler.

Mental dominance = manipulation and intimidation. Exactly what I said, BB !!
Sad fact is, our society encourages bullies, by admiring and lionising those who are pushy and aggressive, and demonising and ostracising those who are reclusive and timid.

it's nothing to do with fascist beliefs as you suggest there at the end. The ' kid glove' approach of today's society clearly isn't working.
And as an addendum to your point 3, violent adults nearly always show violent tendencies in childhood, most usually in the disgusting act of cruelty to animals. If they are stomped on hard early, these tendencies can be curtailed before they become full blown.

 

[gerta]

Some very interesting issues were talking about here... The one that really annoys me (urinates me off in fact) is our harm minimisation policies in school... Very annoying... Watching kids smoking balantly... All teachers can do is tell them please don't smoke... Send them to the Assistant Principal and they get slapped on the wrist... lol

As for bullying don't even start there... However I have seen bullying where its Grade 4 - 6 students stealing sports equipment of year 11 and 12's cause they know that if they even look at then they'll get in trouble

The joys of teaching

Thank god for holidays

 

[choc_a_holic]

Originally posted by Thrawn
Usually teachers and parents say that bullies should be "ignored". Well, it's not that easy. The only way to stop them is to fight back. When I was in grade 5 there were a bunch of kids that picked on me for no reason (or perhaps because I was a small kid back then - they always picked on the smaller types but I was pretty strong for my age). Then on the oval at lunchtime I encountered the group and told them I had enough. In other words, I was thirsty for blood - I grabbed the "ring-leader" whose name was James, a fat kid who was slightly bigger than me, put him in a headlock and punched him in the guts several times. Hard. His 'followers' were gobsmacked and froze like a deer looking at headlights. Obviously they didn't want a piece of me (or a piece of them ripped off, so to speak)

He cried like a sissy girl and ran away. Of course a teacher had to be walking past when this happened - but the principal didn't give a **** because this kid had a history of bullying other kids. And he knew that we weren't getting along. From that day on they never picked on me again, in fact his group were very friendly to be but James avoided me whenever humanly possible. He shat his pants everytime he saw me, I swear.

Bottom line is, ignoring the problem will only make it worse as it with most problems with life.

Hehe that's the tipical fight back from a kid whose getting bullied!

 

[Mr Chuckles]

Originally posted by bunsen burner
capital punishment?

I agree that teachers are too soft on bullies, but it won't solve the problem. I'll be teaching, if not insisting that my kids fight back physically if they are ever in this situation.

Capital punishment won't solve the problem? I'm going to have to disagree with you there. If kids were getting executed for bullying I think we'd see that sort of behaviour wiped out pretty damn quick!

 

[Milkman]

Then capital punishment it is.

 

[bunsen burner]

Originally posted by Mr Chuckles
Capital punishment won't solve the problem? I'm going to have to disagree with you there. If kids were getting executed for bullying I think we'd see that sort of behaviour wiped out pretty damn quick!

What was I thinking? Death to all bullies!

 

[bunsen burner]

Hey Fullerton, have you seen that *** Cliff Richard wearing his bright pink suit at Wimbledon yet?