Remove this Banner Ad

Beauty & Style Defecating oneself

  • Thread starter Thread starter cats81
  • Start date Start date
  • Tagged users Tagged users None

🥰 Love BigFooty? Join now for free.

I shit my pants first week of highschool. I somehow made it to the other side of the school without being noticed, then by the grace of god found an empty toilet block to hose down my legs and throw away my underwear.

A little while later another kid was rumoured to have pissed himself and it stuck with him forever, he was still hearing about it in year 12. It sends chills up my spine to think how my 5 years of highschool would have been if I were discovered that fateful day.
 
i find, when on public transport (which i hate) when the over talkative bright bouncy freak sits next to me and starts unloading their life story on me, that shitting my pants usually has them move quickly, and gives me a nice peaceful ride. Aoart from the fact im sitting in shit...
 

Log in to remove this Banner Ad

Was at a pub in Richmond , thought I was gonna be sick but it came out the other end , it was like porridge , I had the door open in the toilet still and I heard someone say " I think he shit himself " . Closed the door pulled my pants n jocks off , legs covered in poop scooped it off , someone outside described the smell as offensive to horses ! Ran out caught a cab , cab driver said nothing , got home stripped off in the street and threw everything in the bin shoes and all .
 
I remember going down to the local cricket nets with a mate about 5 years back.
Was bowling away, then suddenly got a massive urge to take a dump. Luckily there was a toilet about 100m away.
Unfortunately, i didnt even make it there in time to stop the onset of the beast!
Half crapped myself. Went into the toilet, managed to clean it up, ended up throwing the 5hitty jocks on the roof of the toilet block.
My mate was non the wiser of the incident, wasnt the greatest feeling in the world.

Another incident a few years back. Went to mates place about 2-3 k down the road. Got in the car to leave, just as i pull out of his driveway, i again got the urge to take a dump. Thought to myself, nah ill make it home. Barely got half way and couldnt hold it back, ended up having to pull over to the side of the road and snap it off (thankfully this was in the early morning hrs, noone saw me), unfortunately in my hast, i did make somewhat of a mess, and all i had to clean myself up with was a few KFC napkins.
Managed to get home and clean it up. Most of the time id just wrap up the jocks in a plastic bag and put em directly into the bin outside, escaping ridicule
 
MrNatural said:
I remember going down to the local cricket nets with a mate about 5 years back.
Was bowling away, then suddenly got a massive urge to take a dump. Luckily there was a toilet about 100m away.
Unfortunately, i didnt even make it there in time to stop the onset of the beast!
Half crapped myself. Went into the toilet, managed to clean it up, ended up throwing the 5hitty jocks on the roof of the toilet block.
My mate was non the wiser of the incident, wasnt the greatest feeling in the world.
Click to expand...

That mate of yours doesn't post on bigfooty, does he?
 
SnakePlisskin said:
someone outside described the smell as offensive to horses !
Click to expand...

I was at the cinemas with some mates a few years ago. One of my mates let one go that was putrid. A guy a couple of rows in front said, "****. Who put a dead dog in here?". We killed ourselves laughing.
 

Remove this Banner Ad

Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

Prompted by this post by Oscarman in the "Where is the worst place you've vomited?" thread:

Oscarman said:
Probably also need a thread on the worst place you've had a shit. Had one one day while fishing where I took the boat into the beach, dug a hole in the sand and snapped one off. Another day while on a run I did one in a hedge next to a busy road. Luckily it was before 6 in the morning and no-one saw me, I think.
Click to expand...


I have also been on a run down the street and needed to go, so went down a side-street and jumped a fence onto an abandoned tennis court, don't think anyone saw me. I also did one at a house party after being up for about 24 hours, which was straight out of hell. I went into a nearby empty bedroom where I was talking sh*t with some girl I'd just met afterwards, and denied it when everyone who walked past went absolutely mental at the smell. Was actually hilarious hearing so many different people flip out, and the owner of the house blame his younger brother (as he had apparently been the culprit on many occasions).


Cannot wait for some of the stories that will follow this...:thumbsu:
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

Cant say I've ever needed to take a dump other than the toilet.

But a few years ago in the Northern stand a mother of a baby thought it would be a good idea to change the babies nappy on the seats , half way through the second quarter , after her hubby took their other two kids off for some food.

Fair dinkum the smell was horrific as it just lingered and did not woft away for quite a while.
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

I was at little athletics training, used to hate it but was quite good at it and ran at state champs etc. I always thought I had amazing bowel control and could let rip before anything remotely solid got anywhere close, probably an assumption based on having never shat myself.

We were doing a 1500m time trial and I'm legging it knowing if I get enough distance early between me and second, cause it was only local training no one would catch me. About 300m in I felt a movement, as if the polarity in my bowels had changed position and I thought "no problem, I'll just let out a blow fart, get an extra burst of speed and be on my way".

Immediately once I began to blow I realised it wasn't one of my regular farts, I had managed a mini shart into my jocks. Not wanting that to deter me from taking out the race, I tried out what it would be like running with a sloppy shit in my dacks. Now keep in mind it was only a minuscule amount that had escaped my clutches so there was no stream of shit running down my leg. Once everyone had caught me due to having to change my running style, I faked a upper hamstring injury and fake limped to the clubhouse......straight to the toilet. I assessed the damage and concluded that the jocks had to go, so disposed of them into a hole in the toilet roof somewhere, cleaned myself up and went back out to face the public.

No one said anything and I thought I was like a spy, no one knew what I was up to and know one knew I had shat myself. Having returned they were up to doing 200m time trials, my pet event and said I felt better and ended up running a PB on a day where I had earlier felt a "hamstring tear".
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

On the oval of the middle school I went to, on the cricket pitch.

Except I was 18
and it was 1am...
and I was perilously drunk.
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

Someone from my school (way back in year 8) took a shit in a McDonalds fries packet and left it on the table. They watched the woman pick it up through the window and ran off.
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

My mates had an unhealthy obsession with defecation. Anywhere and everywhere. On top of our primary school, on top of the house of our teacher, in plastic cups at parties...
 

🥰 Love BigFooty? Join now for free.

Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

Gibbsy has a funny story about shitting in public. It involves cardboard. :thumbsu:
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

frantelle said:
I was at little athletics training, used to hate it but was quite good at it and ran at state champs etc. I always thought I had amazing bowel control and could let rip before anything remotely solid got anywhere close, probably an assumption based on having never shat myself.

We were doing a 1500m time trial and I'm legging it knowing if I get enough distance early between me and second, cause it was only local training no one would catch me. About 300m in I felt a movement, as if the polarity in my bowels had changed position and I thought "no problem, I'll just let out a blow fart, get an extra burst of speed and be on my way".

Immediately once I began to blow I realised it wasn't one of my regular farts, I had managed a mini shart into my jocks. Not wanting that to deter me from taking out the race, I tried out what it would be like running with a sloppy shit in my dacks. Now keep in mind it was only a minuscule amount that had escaped my clutches so there was no stream of shit running down my leg. Once everyone had caught me due to having to change my running style, I faked a upper hamstring injury and fake limped to the clubhouse......straight to the toilet. I assessed the damage and concluded that the jocks had to go, so disposed of them into a hole in the toilet roof somewhere, cleaned myself up and went back out to face the public.

No one said anything and I thought I was like a spy, no one knew what I was up to and know one knew I had shat myself. Having returned they were up to doing 200m time trials, my pet event and said I felt better and ended up running a PB on a day where I had earlier felt a "hamstring tear".
Click to expand...

shit.gif
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

On a slide at a school at around 3am, was extremely drunk and easily persuaded by mates. Slid down the entirety of the slide.
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

On somebody's tractor on the seat outside their house :thumbsu::D

Fair to say by the afternoon the next day it was gone....
 
Re: Where is the worst place you, or someone you know, has taken a sh*t?

Somebody I know once took a shit on one of those barbecues they have at public parks....and turned it on. :(

I can imagine the next people to use that barbecue probably lost their appetite.
 

Remove this Banner Ad

Remove this Banner Ad

🥰 Love BigFooty? Join now for free.

Back
Top Bottom