Hilarious article dishing on the Hawks unearthed

[Moggy]

Hey guys,

Perhaps not totally thread-worthy, but I found this great article from 2011 that explains
a) why Hawthorn have so many supporters
b) why big-game wins are wasted on them

I also discovered that Anson Cameron - in my view one of the most interesting commentators on the AFL - is a Cats man.

Enjoy!

http://www.theage.com.au/afl/afl-ne...d-on-the-brown-and-yellow-20110909-1k185.html

 

[FredLeDeux]

Hey guys,

Perhaps not totally thread-worthy, but I found this great article from 2011 that explains
a) why Hawthorn have so many supporters
b) why big-game wins are wasted on them

I also discovered that Anson Cameron - in my view one of the most interesting commentators on the AFL - is a Cats man.

Enjoy!

http://www.theage.com.au/afl/afl-ne...d-on-the-brown-and-yellow-20110909-1k185.html

Absolutely priceless, some of it. A couple of the more brilliantly insightful bits:

[Kennett] closed every asylum in the state and the streets of Melbourne were awash with chattering messiahs likely to accuse you of bestiality in Belarus before mounting a wheelie bin and whipping it to victory in the third at Sandown. Hawthorn's membership grew exponentially....

([Talking about 1989] If you want to see civilisation suspended, .... look into Dipper's eyes as he heffalumps towards a pack with his tongue lolling.

 

[Claude Balls]

Ha, very good. These bits too are very funny.

And with that wink a contagion of leers swept the board.

Just a rumour? Maybe. But rumours exist to explain mysteries. And to the Geelong fan the Hawk fan is a mystery. Why? Why do it?


And the main theme is true. I recall a Hawk fan sitting next to me at the 2008 grand final saying "finally", with the most loathsome apathy. He was about 50.

 

[footscore]

That's Gold!

 

[Cursed Cat]

yup, I actually posted this article a while back (twice, in different threads) - one of my very favourite pieces of footy writing, absolutely hilarious and very insightful.

 

[Geelong_Sicko]

Written just before our glorious Qualifying Final triumph over those born-to-rule toilet bowl stains in 2011. "We've played only six finals against them for two wins." Anson notes. Three from seven after that night's festivities.

I think I'll watch that one again tonight

 

[Jimmy Yamazaki]

Definitely not Geelong board worthy, c'mon guys, we're better then that.

 

[Geelong_Sicko]

Not board worthy?

OH YES IT IS!

It's like a pantomime, isn't it? I swear though, there's nothing better than an op-ed piece denigrating the Hawthorn Football Club. Footy-hate is a GOOD thing, a positive thing. I invest a tad more than the usual every time we play the bastards, and I'm sure interest amongst the toilet bowl revellers at Hawthorn/Waverley/Launceston is rather piqued when that time of year comes around as well.

 

[BotsMaster]

Apparently the game was meaningless

 

[Geelong_Sicko]

Yep. They'll beat us each and every time when it really counts. All other finals are more meaningless than a match for four points, and EVERYONE knows how meaningless they are. Forty premiership points and avoiding a soul-destroying choke to Collingwood in the prelim final - what are they, anyway?

 

[Turbocat]

Mmm , they could only get away with that in the Age.

Some rather cutting humour in there :

http://www.theage.com.au/afl/afl-ne...d-on-the-brown-and-yellow-20110909-1k185.html

For its first 60 years the club had no identity and history records nothing of it. Then it found a dark ethos and hit pay dirt. They decided that one of the few variables in the game that hadn't been exploited was morality

and

See, when Yabby asked his players, during the 1989 grand final, if they'd pay the price, he wasn't talking about shoes. This was an entreaty to totalitarianism. That question, reinterpreted by a Cat fan so the world can hear the horror encoded in it, goes like this: ''Will you burn your enemy's villages? Will you slaughter his livestock, plough salt into his fields and steal his women? Will you pole-axe rangas when they aren't looking? Will you repeatedly kick the footy through your own goals in contravention of the spirit of the game?'' The answer from the men in brown and gold is always ''yes''

Take a litle bit of history , add humour and exaggeration , build by adding preposterous examples and then once taken it to an extreme , add something that seems extreme but was actually what they did.



http://www.theage.com.au/afl/afl-ne...d-on-the-brown-and-yellow-20110909-1k185.html

 

[jazzee]

I remember that article at the time. Lost at least two Hawk supporting 'friends' on facebook posting it to their walls.

 

[FredLeDeux]

I remember that article at the time. Lost at least two Hawk supporting 'friends' on facebook posting it to their walls.

Should've sent'em some Sapporo.

 

[Turbocat]

Ok , can I put a bit balance on this. Thinking on it all day the attitude that I and others have noted in Hawk supporters , that attitude of expectation , that attitude of..winning is normal.. is the result of a generation of supporters living the Hawk GrandFinalathon. Every year playing in a GF and so many wins. That attitude of expectation grates on so many of us but is it really so abnormal.

Let me ask , what will the younger generation of Geelong supporters be like (as most of us believe) ,if Geelong went on and have even more success. I can't imagine the older generation changing too much , the tempered , level head , keep the Cap on it type supporters are the one who have been thru previous eras of pain. But what of the kids , what of these lucky little Catters who like my own kids are growing accustom to being a top winning side?

One only has to look on this site , the reaction of when Geelong drops off its performance is abnormally accute. It wasn't that long ago that I just prayed to all the incorporated Gods for me to see a Flag before I die. Now he we are 3 Flags later all hoping for more.

I put it to you that if we do an absolute premium job of transition , and go and replicate ourselves with the next group of players , we may just be looking at our most arrogant , success expectant supporters ever to have followed the Cats.

 

[iameviljez]

I remember that article at the time. Lost at least two Hawk supporting 'friends' on facebook posting it to their walls.

Worth it.

 

[Moggy]

Ok , can I put a bit balance on this. Thinking on it all day the attitude that I and others have noted in Hawk supporters , that attitude of expectation , that attitude of..winning is normal.. is the result of a generation of supporters living the Hawk GrandFinalathon. Every year playing in a GF and so many wins. That attitude of expectation grates on so many of us but is it really so abnormal.

Let me ask , what will the younger generation of Geelong supporters be like (as most of us believe) ,if Geelong went on and have even more success. I can't imagine the older generation changing too much , the tempered , level head , keep the Cap on it type supporters are the one who have been thru previous eras of pain. But what of the kids , what of these lucky little Catters who like my own kids are growing accustom to being a top winning side?

One only has to look on this site , the reaction of when Geelong drops off its performance is abnormally accute. It wasn't that long ago that I just prayed to all the incorporated Gods for me to see a Flag before I die. Now he we are 3 Flags later all hoping for more.

I put it to you that if we do an absolute premium job of transition , and go and replicate ourselves with the next group of players , we may just be looking at our most arrogant , success expectant supporters ever to have followed the Cats.

Killjoy!

 

[iameviljez]

I do like the way that the article suggests that such violent acts were well beyond the ken of Ablett Sr. Ahem...

 

[FredLeDeux]

I do like the way that the article suggests that such violent acts were well beyond the ken of Ablett Sr. Ahem...

But he wasn't working for the forces of evil.

 

[Turbocat]

Killjoy!

My middle name.

 

[iameviljez]

But he wasn't working for the forces of evil.

He was, briefly, but we shan't mention that.

 

[Cicatriz]

I went to the Hawthorn v Sydney game the other night. At the half the Hawks were up by 40 points and instead of clapping/cheering their players off the ground they on mass just booed the umpires off the ground. Just like the article,it summed them up beautifully to me.

 

[GeneticCat]

Ok , can I put a bit balance on this. Thinking on it all day the attitude that I and others have noted in Hawk supporters , that attitude of expectation , that attitude of..winning is normal.. is the result of a generation of supporters living the Hawk GrandFinalathon. Every year playing in a GF and so many wins. That attitude of expectation grates on so many of us but is it really so abnormal.

Let me ask , what will the younger generation of Geelong supporters be like (as most of us believe) ,if Geelong went on and have even more success. I can't imagine the older generation changing too much , the tempered , level head , keep the Cap on it type supporters are the one who have been thru previous eras of pain. But what of the kids , what of these lucky little Catters who like my own kids are growing accustom to being a top winning side?

One only has to look on this site , the reaction of when Geelong drops off its performance is abnormally accute. It wasn't that long ago that I just prayed to all the incorporated Gods for me to see a Flag before I die. Now he we are 3 Flags later all hoping for more.

I put it to you that if we do an absolute premium job of transition , and go and replicate ourselves with the next group of players , we may just be looking at our most arrogant , success expectant supporters ever to have followed the Cats.

I've just had the "Lid" conversation with my 7 year old who has only known joy in his footy life (his mum is a Swan). I couldn't stress enough how important it is to be a "Cats supporter" in every sense. He mentioned the Lid to me tonight when we looked at the teams... So proud!

 

[catman 71]

Ok , can I put a bit balance on this. Thinking on it all day the attitude that I and others have noted in Hawk supporters , that attitude of expectation , that attitude of..winning is normal.. is the result of a generation of supporters living the Hawk GrandFinalathon. Every year playing in a GF and so many wins. That attitude of expectation grates on so many of us but is it really so abnormal.

Let me ask , what will the younger generation of Geelong supporters be like (as most of us believe) ,if Geelong went on and have even more success. I can't imagine the older generation changing too much , the tempered , level head , keep the Cap on it type supporters are the one who have been thru previous eras of pain. But what of the kids , what of these lucky little Catters who like my own kids are growing accustom to being a top winning side?

One only has to look on this site , the reaction of when Geelong drops off its performance is abnormally accute. It wasn't that long ago that I just prayed to all the incorporated Gods for me to see a Flag before I die. Now he we are 3 Flags later all hoping for more.

I put it to you that if we do an absolute premium job of transition , and go and replicate ourselves with the next group of players , we may just be looking at our most arrogant , success expectant supporters ever to have followed the Cats.

I am already arrogant about Geelong! So, too late!