- Joined
- Apr 3, 2001
- Posts
- 2,633
- Reaction score
- 0
- Other Teams
- Hawthorn
You males *spits to left* make my skin crawl 
Obviously a very difficult task
- Thread starter Mocca
- Start date
- Tagged users None
🥰 Love BigFooty? Join now for free.
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2001
- Posts
- 2,633
- Reaction score
- 0
- Other Teams
- Hawthorn
Have you ever wondered where the chocolate chips come from
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2000
- Posts
- 27,105
- Reaction score
- 45
- Location
- pellegrini's espresso bar
- AFL Club
- North Melbourne
Originally posted by Sly77
Have you ever wondered where the chocolate chips come from
Ever wondered why I use your muffins as paperweights?
Log in to remove this Banner Ad
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2002
- Posts
- 1,247
- Reaction score
- 27
- Other Teams
- THE BULLDOGS
i have a toilet paper problem at school... we have crappy toilet paper dispensers (u no the 1's that hold about 3 rolls at a time?) Well anyways, you need a bloody degree in toilet paper unrolling to get any out.
You have to lift the roll above through the little hole in the side and with the other hand pull out some toilet paper by rolling the roll through a little hole in the bottom. You usually get 1 square at a time.
I want to know who invented the bloody things! Cos he or she is a bloody moron!
You have to lift the roll above through the little hole in the side and with the other hand pull out some toilet paper by rolling the roll through a little hole in the bottom. You usually get 1 square at a time.
I want to know who invented the bloody things! Cos he or she is a bloody moron!
- Joined
- Oct 17, 2000
- Posts
- 13,107
- Reaction score
- 49
- AFL Club
- Essendon
- Other Teams
- Fitzroy
Being back at my former workplace for a while, I have noticed that the toilet roll is NEVER replaced. EVER. We have endless signs all over the staff room, reminding the girls to wash our own dishes, blah blah and the list of duties that everyone seems to be ignoring. It's bloody annoying!!!!!!!!
We have endless signs all over the staff room, reminding the girls to wash our own dishes, blah blah and the list of duties that everyone seems to be ignoring. It's bloody annoying!!!!!!!!
- Joined
- Jun 12, 2002
- Posts
- 3,495
- Reaction score
- 245
- AFL Club
- Port Adelaide
I'm the guy who leaves one solitary square off paper dangling from the toilet roll to abstain from my responsibility of changing the roll...... hey there is still paper on the roll i cant just throw it away.
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2001
- Posts
- 2,633
- Reaction score
- 0
- Other Teams
- Hawthorn
Originally posted by Zombie
I'm the guy who leaves one solitary square off paper dangling from the toilet roll to abstain from my responsibility of changing the roll...... hey there is still paper on the roll i cant just throw it away.
I HATE YOU
*errrrrrrrrrrr hang on a tick - I go to female toilets.........*
I take it back Zombie, you can do whatever you like in the stinky mens loos, just don't expect an invite to my home!
- Joined
- Mar 2, 2001
- Posts
- 8,029
- Reaction score
- 12
- Location
- Beneath the blue & white
- AFL Club
- North Melbourne
Indeed a vexing issue Mocca. The aspect of this that has me shaking my head the most is one you touched on, where people who are subsequent users after the original offender, who can clearly see that the holder is our of paper, and instead of replacing it, simply choose to grab a spare one, use their fill and then place it on top of the flusher thingy or even worse, back in the friggen bag!! They have come that far, how hard could it possibly be for them to go that extra step and actually place it on the holder? Hard ask, we know!
Now not meaning to hijack your thread brother, but to start my own thread would simply be imitation (not that you arent worthy my friend!!). But you have inspired me, so if i may....
..another incommodious habbit i often come across in all walks of bathroom life, is the anti-flusher. Now dont get me wrong people, i have often risen from the throne a coupla kilos lighter after a good 25 minute session and turned around to survey the carnage and been filled with a unique sense of pride at the masterpiece i have just given birth to. Sometimes even been inclined to take a picture just for prosperity - memories are indeed made of these! Hey, on the odd occasion i've even thought about giving it a name, calling in a mate, the Missus or even just a passer by to come and have a look at the classic i have just hatched.
But never, NEVER have i been so audacious as to actually try and leave the crime scene without first trying to cover up the evidence. Flushing it away, as hard as it can be sometimes to let go, is a fundamental practice i would have thought everyone was on to. I mean, it could just be me, but i like painting on a fresh canvas and try to give that same respect to those that have thier own work to do after my reign has finished.
What is the mentality here? Do we have any serial anti-flushers in our midst? Is it similar to the way infant children walk around gathering their toys and giving them to guests in their houses, as some kind of peace offering or gift? Am i meant to take it in gratitude that someone thought highly enough of me or my colleagues to leave their contribution in the bowl for all of us to enjoy? Is it along the same lines as Rohan's motivations to posting on BF? Your help would be appreciated.
To extend on this, there is also the breed i refer to as the chog bandit. Possibly a watered down breed of the anti-flusher, this creature's eccentricity is its want to leave a reminder of the work it has just performed in the form of skid mark on the bowl. Kind of like a calling card i guess.
They are an enigmatic creature in that they have evolved past the anti-flusher to an extent and have come to terms with pressing the flush button or whatever action performs this task, yet havent quite taken the next evolutionary step of recognising a 4 inch sh*t stain that is a remnant of a henious dump, often a consequence of copious amounts of beer and/or Indian food the night before, and that if left on the bowl for anymore than a few minutes, will result in permanent enamle stainage. Now this occurence is perhaps forgivable in a cubicle which is void of the humble toilet brush such as is often the case in your large companies or what have you, and in this case simply gives the next user something to aim for when going for a quick empty out. But in the more domesticated scenario where toilet brushes are readily available, i simply fail to see how this act can be justified. My girlfriend's older brother is the poster boy of the chog bandits association. He redefines the term lazy, which has often caused much consternation in their household, considering that a piano school is run out of said household and the traffic flow through said toilet is sometimes quite regular, and where the sight of a twitching chog stain can result in some embarrassment.
Once again, i dont quite understand the mentality of the chog leaver. I'm presuming its a similar premise to the anti-flusher where they are either very giving people and want everyone to share the fruits of their labour, or are severly lacking self respect or motivation.
Anyway, thanks for listening.
Now not meaning to hijack your thread brother, but to start my own thread would simply be imitation (not that you arent worthy my friend!!). But you have inspired me, so if i may....
..another incommodious habbit i often come across in all walks of bathroom life, is the anti-flusher. Now dont get me wrong people, i have often risen from the throne a coupla kilos lighter after a good 25 minute session and turned around to survey the carnage and been filled with a unique sense of pride at the masterpiece i have just given birth to. Sometimes even been inclined to take a picture just for prosperity - memories are indeed made of these! Hey, on the odd occasion i've even thought about giving it a name, calling in a mate, the Missus or even just a passer by to come and have a look at the classic i have just hatched.
But never, NEVER have i been so audacious as to actually try and leave the crime scene without first trying to cover up the evidence. Flushing it away, as hard as it can be sometimes to let go, is a fundamental practice i would have thought everyone was on to. I mean, it could just be me, but i like painting on a fresh canvas and try to give that same respect to those that have thier own work to do after my reign has finished.
What is the mentality here? Do we have any serial anti-flushers in our midst? Is it similar to the way infant children walk around gathering their toys and giving them to guests in their houses, as some kind of peace offering or gift? Am i meant to take it in gratitude that someone thought highly enough of me or my colleagues to leave their contribution in the bowl for all of us to enjoy? Is it along the same lines as Rohan's motivations to posting on BF? Your help would be appreciated.
To extend on this, there is also the breed i refer to as the chog bandit. Possibly a watered down breed of the anti-flusher, this creature's eccentricity is its want to leave a reminder of the work it has just performed in the form of skid mark on the bowl. Kind of like a calling card i guess.
They are an enigmatic creature in that they have evolved past the anti-flusher to an extent and have come to terms with pressing the flush button or whatever action performs this task, yet havent quite taken the next evolutionary step of recognising a 4 inch sh*t stain that is a remnant of a henious dump, often a consequence of copious amounts of beer and/or Indian food the night before, and that if left on the bowl for anymore than a few minutes, will result in permanent enamle stainage. Now this occurence is perhaps forgivable in a cubicle which is void of the humble toilet brush such as is often the case in your large companies or what have you, and in this case simply gives the next user something to aim for when going for a quick empty out. But in the more domesticated scenario where toilet brushes are readily available, i simply fail to see how this act can be justified. My girlfriend's older brother is the poster boy of the chog bandits association. He redefines the term lazy, which has often caused much consternation in their household, considering that a piano school is run out of said household and the traffic flow through said toilet is sometimes quite regular, and where the sight of a twitching chog stain can result in some embarrassment.
Once again, i dont quite understand the mentality of the chog leaver. I'm presuming its a similar premise to the anti-flusher where they are either very giving people and want everyone to share the fruits of their labour, or are severly lacking self respect or motivation.
Anyway, thanks for listening.
Mobbs
A Large Portion, Yes
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2000
- Posts
- 85,484
- Reaction score
- 103,067
- Location
- www.footypedia.com/qooty
- Other Teams
- Fitzroy FC
I deal with the same issue as dancin' douggie, a tri-roll dispenser. When roll 1 is finished, remove 'doo-der-doo-der-doo' (cardboard thingy) and two top rolls trundle down to take over.
Issue is that they already trundle down while roll 1 is still active, infringing upon personal space of roll 1 in a claustrophobic sense, preventing roll 1 from twirling effectively when tugged at. If you're lucky the weight of rolls 2 and 3 upon roll 1 will allow one page to be torn from roll 1, though on more plentiful occasions only enough paper to cover your thumbtip will be torn free.
So whenever see the dispenser topped up with 3 rolls, i spend a minute or two removing the top 2 rolls (rolls 2 and 3) back through the entrance (top of dispenser), to free up movement for roll 1. The entryway is so tight, with a nasty metal lid including lock, that they usually return to the outer world a little worse for wear, torn and tattered, but they do live on to wipe another day.
If someone has a problem with it, then they can change the dispenser because they current machinery is totally ineffective, cumbersome and frustrating.
Another thing is the hands-drier. Ours is motion activated, have to hold your hands near a sensor to get it going. Sensor is in a strange place, I've never found out exactly where. To get the heat to switch one, hands have to be held within millimetres of the exhaust, usually with the wrists near the actual outflow, and hands further past.
The result is that to get hot air to run, it is at the expense of flailing the skin off your wrists, while not drying your hands at all.
It's a wonder I can type.
Issue is that they already trundle down while roll 1 is still active, infringing upon personal space of roll 1 in a claustrophobic sense, preventing roll 1 from twirling effectively when tugged at. If you're lucky the weight of rolls 2 and 3 upon roll 1 will allow one page to be torn from roll 1, though on more plentiful occasions only enough paper to cover your thumbtip will be torn free.
So whenever see the dispenser topped up with 3 rolls, i spend a minute or two removing the top 2 rolls (rolls 2 and 3) back through the entrance (top of dispenser), to free up movement for roll 1. The entryway is so tight, with a nasty metal lid including lock, that they usually return to the outer world a little worse for wear, torn and tattered, but they do live on to wipe another day.
If someone has a problem with it, then they can change the dispenser because they current machinery is totally ineffective, cumbersome and frustrating.
Another thing is the hands-drier. Ours is motion activated, have to hold your hands near a sensor to get it going. Sensor is in a strange place, I've never found out exactly where. To get the heat to switch one, hands have to be held within millimetres of the exhaust, usually with the wrists near the actual outflow, and hands further past.
The result is that to get hot air to run, it is at the expense of flailing the skin off your wrists, while not drying your hands at all.
It's a wonder I can type.
- Joined
- Sep 13, 2000
- Posts
- 86,851
- Reaction score
- 42,960
- Location
- Melbourne cricket ground. Australia
- AFL Club
- Hawthorn
- Other Teams
- Horks
Sounds like a great way to share jerms around.
Q How many man to change a toilet roll ?
A Nobody knows. It's never been done
Customer to barman with a beard.
"Are you the landlord here (strokes his beard)"
"Yes"
"I need to tell you something about your toilets (strokes beard with other hand)"
"Whats that ?"
"There's no toilet paper left"
Mocca
Team Captain
- Thread starter
- #39
Carlos you crazy, wacky, madcap prankster! Very funny stuff.
Yes, this office has its 'chog bandits', including one that Pump described a couple of weeks ago ...
Carlos, as for your 'artwork' descriptions, I can only nod sagely and concur with your thoughts. A lovingly crafted pooscape is a most underrated form of aesthetic beauty. Michelangelo did most of his best work on the throne.
Yes, this office has its 'chog bandits', including one that Pump described a couple of weeks ago ...
Don't try this at home kids. I've had a think about the logistics of getting a skid mark down the front of the bowl, and apart from the ways that Pump describes, the only conceivable way of doing it is to be sunk so far down in the bowl as to give you an accessible angle to the front of the receptacle. Not only does that make for an uncomfortable bogging experience, but you open up the possibility of getting stuck, and there's also the nasty possibility of splashback, which nobody wants.
Carlos, as for your 'artwork' descriptions, I can only nod sagely and concur with your thoughts. A lovingly crafted pooscape is a most underrated form of aesthetic beauty. Michelangelo did most of his best work on the throne.
Time your bowel movements so you only ever do them at home. If I ever get the feeling I'm gonna need one in the next 7 or 8 hours I have a go before I leave. Usually works.
Similar threads
