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now this is the first story we wrote and yeah its the good *****
One day the captain of the Melbourne Football Club, David Neitz, woke up to find his house in a total mess.
He of course assumed a burglar came in during the night, but after seeing nothing was stolen he realised that his house was a mess because, well u see David, being the sensitive new age guy that he is and the fact that his mother cleans his house, really is asking for it. What David forgot is that Schwarta had been staying over after they had spent the previous day at the races and that night drinking and well Schwarta being the slob that he is Didn't bother cleaning up of course.
So Neita chucked Oxy out and told him he'll seem him later at training.
He than got Whitey (who had a big hangover) and Chris to help clean up!
They cleaning was suddenly disturbed by a phone call from someone claiming to be a footballer. There was this blubbering at the end of the line. Something about not being able to kick or handball or something. As David was hungover, he wasnt in the mood for jokes so he yelled "If thats you Gerge PISS OFF.... I have told u time and time again u cant play football ! no matter how hard u try" the blubbering turned in to uncontrollable sobbing and Neita hung up the phone in disgust as He realised he had better things to do than listen to Gerge be his usual self and cry like a girl.
He actually realised that it was daylight saving last night but due to him being TOTALLY hung over he didnt change the clocks and he was now running very late to training.
So Neita picked up Whitey who was doing something Neita really couldn't work out involving a guitar a bad hangover and they both got into Neita's car and drove off quickly.
On the way to training they were speeding down st kilda road when out of nowhere came these ducks waddling across the road.. now being the nice sweet guy that he is Neita stopped to let the ducks pass....then suddenly someone came up behind him and BAMM! drove straight into the back of his car. forcing it to jolt forward and kill one of the ducklings....Neita and Whitey both jumped out of the car, and as whitey was getting attacked by the ducks Neita went to see who the other driver was when he saw Johnno who we all know is off his head no matter what time of the day it is!
Johnno was actually pretty happy to see he wasn't the only one late to training AGAIN
So by the time Whitey finished fighting off the duck that was now eating away his eye, Neita and Johnno fixed up the insurance thingis and got back into the car.
Happily but not so safely they arrived to training only to find that Whitey has taken one of the ducks with him.
Naturally the boys loved the ducks and decided to make it their team pet naming it SILKY!!!! cos it was actually an albino duck and had beautiful white feathers and such smooth skin....All the guys thought it was fantastic....and as they stood in the middle of junction oval playing with silky there was an eerie silence and then as they all turned to look at the change rooms he appeared Out of his shinny blue car, as he showed off a bit of muscle and a tanned 6 pack, he walked over to the middle of the oval and said: "Oh my god i am soooooo much silkier than that DUCK!" and with that he went into the change rooms to wax his eyebrows!
The boys were now getting quiet sick of their new pet Silky.... sicker than they were of their old pet Silky! and so they decided to go into the change rooms rooms and saw Woey crying in the corner of the rooms. Robbo went up to him and sat next to him and said "Whats wrong little buddy?" and Woey replied "I ran out of wax AND peroxide. This has never happened. what will i do? Robbo put his arm around Woey's shoulder to console him and he said "Mate we all go through hard times, i mean the other day i found out my girlfriend had balls. How do u think i felt?" As the snickers started from the rest of the boys Robbo and Woey than had a deep and meaningful convo which went a little something like this:
Woey: Wow man im sorry. I mean she looks like a man but i never though she really was one
Robbo: Yeah well what can you do? Its better at least now i can break up with her and not feel guilty
Woey: Well look on the bright side. Now that she is gone you can maybe make a move on me
Robbo: Woe! I already told ya man.... it ain't my thing
Woey: Sorry i forget! The loss of peroxide is really getting to me
and put itching powder in his g string...when there was this almighty girly shriek came from the room EEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!! all the guys an to the rooms to see what the commotion was except for Schwarta who was with the duck in the middle of the ground trying to work out how he could make money from it....They got to the Robbo: How about i run off and get you some more wax than?
Woey: Oh that would be great thanks
So with that Robbo got into his car and drove to the nearest chemist. While browsing through the shelves trying to find the most sensitive wax for his buddy's sensitive skin Robbo bumped into OR !!!!!!!!!!!!! lol she was there buying.......LAXATIVES!!!!!!! That’s right. The previous night Or had been out with some friends and eaten some really bad food. Robbo saw and ran up to and said "Oh hey am i glad to see u, the strangest thing happened yesterday" "I was going for a walk with my dog (no not Grgic the other one!) when i bumped into your friend Mishy. She told me that you have apperantly been looking at other players and taking a liking to them is that true?" Robbo asked with tears in his eyes
"Ummm.... all i said was that i like brucey...... please don't be mad i'm still an obsessive freak when it comes to you...... i promise!" Or said in a pleading tone!
"Ok thats fine than.... i was just making sure! Hey while you are here would you like a life anywhere?" Robbo asked
"Training would be good" Or replied
So Or and Robbo got into the car and by this stage Or was very happy and in the process of hypervantilation!
When they got to training the found Schwarta running madly after the little duck who Schwarta discovered couldn't make him rich! Still Schwarta was determined to catch the bastard and at least sell it to some blind kid for a bit of money, and as Schwarta ran after the duck running out of breath he bumped into SAM NEWMAN!! Who was holding a lemon meringue pie. Schwarta just gave him the finger and took the pie and ate it. Then Sam picked up the duck and looked at...and "U IDIOT!" put down the duck and walked away. Schwarta sat down with the pie AND the duck and just ate and he thought. He thought about the past. He thought about the future. He thought about how a roast duck and veggies would taste tonight. So off he went to ring his mum to ask her how to cook roast duck. Sitting on the edge of the oval was the old grand man Stephen Febey he looks at Schwarta, the duck and the pie and says He is nearly as old as me and still needs him mum to cook for him!
As he watched Schwarta walking off with a pie in one hand a the little yellow fluffy duck in the other Febes comes up with an idea.
He decides to organise and big party and invite all the players and lots of single girls. That way Schwarta can find a girl to cook for him and Robbo could find a girl who doesn't have balls and maybe Woey could find a guy... errr... i mean a girl!
So anyways Febes calls his brother and they organise and big huge singles night party down at the pub Schwarta's eyes lite up like a kid at Christmas he thought "Chicks GAWWWWDDD it has been ages. I don’t think i can do it?" Febes looked at him undoubtedly "Of course u can do it. You got more mo jo than Austin Powers!"
So they went to the pub and started to organise the party. All the guys were invited. And a call went out to all the single girls to get down there at 8pm tonight for what was sure to be a full on night of alcohol and well sex! All Schwarta had to do know was get rid of the duck. So he gave it to Greeny, he is known to be an animal lover.
Meanwhile Greeny wanted to come to the party so he decided to leave the silky the ALBINO duck at home.
Everyone arrived one by one... even the players who had partners came and the party was on its way.
While all the guys were dancing away and drinking LOTS of every alcoholic drink known to human kind Chell was sitting in the corner all the alone.
Greeny (the humanitarian! ) walked over and asked him what was wrong.
Chell than said sadly.... I have garlic breath and no one wants to talk to me as Greeny collapsed on the floor because of Chells breath. So everyone rushes over. There were whispers all around "What do we do? What do we do?" and then in bursts MACCA!!!! "I know. I'll give him mouth to mouth!" Then suddenly Greeny jumps up. "I'M OK!" he shouts and then he spots a blonde in the corner and says "But I'd like to give you mouth to mouth" and walks over to her and spends the rest of the night with this mysteriously woman. While at the rest of the party the guys were getting quiet **** faced!
All of a sudden a fight breaks out between Brucey and Tommo. As those two are going for their life no one knows what brought this fight about.
Than suddenly a mysterious black head walks over to the bar and takes out a gun and says "OI! quit that fighting or else !" and because they r pissed as parrots, Schwarta retaliates by saying "Or else waht? u short arsed wimp!" and the guy with the gun goes "Or else ill shoot ya." "Yeah my arse you'll shoot me!" quips Schwarta. The gunman could see the fire in his eyes. "Come on...Who are you gonna shoot? ME?" "No. says the gunman. I'll shoot Woey" as a gasp comes over the crowd, Schwarta just shrugs and as he walks away says "Hmm thats ok then. Just clean up the mess. I dont like it when the pub is messy." as Neita shot a greasy glare towards The Ox, remembering what he did to his house. The gunman reveals all. It is Woeys waxer Or should we say EX-waxer
He than breaks down in tears and tells of the heart breaking story of their relationship and how woey left him for a younger waxer!
The rave music stops (Greeny and Chell ARE NOT happy) and everyone listens to the Wayne the Waxer as Woey makes an escape out the back door.
Woey is distrubed by the whole story. He walks through the dark gutters of South Melbourne when suddenly he sees a small black shadow in the distance. He walks up to it slowly and the QUAAAAACK!!!!! The albino duck jumps out of the shadow chaing Woey back down to the Bay road, and he sees Whitey getting into a cab, so he yell out to him and Whitey sees the duck and jumps into the cab and it speeds off. As it passes the duck, it notices that Whitey is in the cab and it starts to chase the cab. As the cab driver got faster, the duck got faster...there was smoke coming off its feet..There was no escape from this little duck....It took one and a half hours and $150 cab fair to lose him...Whitey breathed a sigh of relief as he climbed out of the cab and into his house where Neita was already home. He apperantly passed out and was now lying on the sofa drooling.....
Whitey started laughing at Neita as he too was D- R- U- N- K until he passed out too and fall on top of Neita.
Their sleep was cut short at 6am when the phone rang.
Neita pushed Whitey off him and picked up the phone.
"HELLO?" Neita said angerly
"Dave its Brad mate.... you know how i took Silky last night from Oxy?"
"Sort of.... i really don't remember much.... well besides that blond chick i was with....... now she was good..... if only i could remember her name"
"DAVE! concentrate this is important..... oh by the way my chick was nice too...... i got her number........."
*Greeny slaps himself as he loses his concentration*
"Ok so anyways..... i took Silky home and left it there but when i got home this morning..... now she was one wild chick.......... IT WAS GONE"
"Oh Mate! you are in big trouble. Listen just come to training this arvo and we'll sort it out ok?" With that Neita hung up the phone and went back to sleep.
Later that afternoon Neita arrived to training with Whitey (this time making sure not to stop for any sort of animal crossing the road..... too bad for the poor seagull! ) and decided to pretend nothing was wrong... when Schwarta showed up, the first thing he did was run over to Greeny to see where the duck was. the thing it, this meant that Schwarta would have to run the whole way across the field to where Greeny and Neita were standing. Because the night before had been a little to eventful for Schwarta, and he was a little bit (a lot!!) hung over, he needed to stop and take a breather after running only 75m.
Once Schwarta got to where Greeny and Neita were standing, Schwarta took a few moments to catch his breath and then began...
"oh brad mate, you have no idea what a night i had! i couldn't sleep coz i missed silky..." Neita interrupted with a bit of a worried voice "aahh, mate, lets discuss the little duck later. we're here to train, and thats what we'll do. i've heard about a bunch of people that have started writing stories about us coz we're doing to ****ty, and thats all they have to do now. so c'mon, lets get stared. "
"Yeah, thats a good idea! we kinda need to pick up and do better, so discussing a silly old duck isn't going to help much. hey Dave?" continues Greeny.
Schwarta looked at the 2 others in disgust. "what is with the 2 of you?? firstly, you used to love SILKY! and secondly, no one, not even Melbourne supporters would write a story about us, coz I'm sure they have better things to do! now, brad mate, tell me where the duck is or I'll." Schwarta couldn't contain himself, and the tears were now crawling slowly down his cheeck.
Whats wrong with him the players thought, this is not the mean Oxy we know... this is like Grgic!
"OI! i know what you are all thinking, but its not what you think it really isn't.... i just want Silky ok? I have this great idea and i think i know excatly how to make a great profit from it" Schwarta said.
Greeny decided to come clean as Neita was just walking away scared of being screamed at for lying to Schwarta and hiding the truth from one of his best buddies.
Schwarta punched Greeny "you idiot! I give you a stupid little duck and you can't look after him? How bloody hard is it to look for a dumb little helpless duck???" Schwarta screamed.
"Errr.... sorry to intrude.... but i think there is something i should tell you...." Whitey interupted as he took a deep breath explained last night events involving the two silkies, himself and the cab.
All the players laughed, they assumed Whitey was drunk and made the whole thing up.
Where's Woey? We'll ask him what REALLY happened! Said Schwarta.
"Hey? Where is Woey? He is never late to training" Said Robbo in a concerned voice. The players started to worry, maybe Whitey wasn't bull****ting and the duck really was this evil creature and Woey really was gone!
After a long talk with Neale and the rest of the coaching staff who assured them Woey was suppose to be coming to training the boys decided it was time to take action so they started training and then Robbo got a phone call from Woey's beautician. He was in tears. "He didnt turn up for his appointment, and he never misses one. We always sit and talk and have a good bitch, but he isnt here" as the beautician starts to hyperventilate." Robbo was devastated. He knew something was fishy. Woey would never miss an appointment with the beautician. Robbo hung up, and said. "That's it, stuff training we HAVE to look for Woey." "And the duck" Pipes Schwarta. The others just roll their eyes, as they walk away............
One day the captain of the Melbourne Football Club, David Neitz, woke up to find his house in a total mess.
He of course assumed a burglar came in during the night, but after seeing nothing was stolen he realised that his house was a mess because, well u see David, being the sensitive new age guy that he is and the fact that his mother cleans his house, really is asking for it. What David forgot is that Schwarta had been staying over after they had spent the previous day at the races and that night drinking and well Schwarta being the slob that he is Didn't bother cleaning up of course.
So Neita chucked Oxy out and told him he'll seem him later at training.
He than got Whitey (who had a big hangover) and Chris to help clean up!
They cleaning was suddenly disturbed by a phone call from someone claiming to be a footballer. There was this blubbering at the end of the line. Something about not being able to kick or handball or something. As David was hungover, he wasnt in the mood for jokes so he yelled "If thats you Gerge PISS OFF.... I have told u time and time again u cant play football ! no matter how hard u try" the blubbering turned in to uncontrollable sobbing and Neita hung up the phone in disgust as He realised he had better things to do than listen to Gerge be his usual self and cry like a girl.
He actually realised that it was daylight saving last night but due to him being TOTALLY hung over he didnt change the clocks and he was now running very late to training.
So Neita picked up Whitey who was doing something Neita really couldn't work out involving a guitar a bad hangover and they both got into Neita's car and drove off quickly.
On the way to training they were speeding down st kilda road when out of nowhere came these ducks waddling across the road.. now being the nice sweet guy that he is Neita stopped to let the ducks pass....then suddenly someone came up behind him and BAMM! drove straight into the back of his car. forcing it to jolt forward and kill one of the ducklings....Neita and Whitey both jumped out of the car, and as whitey was getting attacked by the ducks Neita went to see who the other driver was when he saw Johnno who we all know is off his head no matter what time of the day it is!
Johnno was actually pretty happy to see he wasn't the only one late to training AGAIN
So by the time Whitey finished fighting off the duck that was now eating away his eye, Neita and Johnno fixed up the insurance thingis and got back into the car.
Happily but not so safely they arrived to training only to find that Whitey has taken one of the ducks with him.
Naturally the boys loved the ducks and decided to make it their team pet naming it SILKY!!!! cos it was actually an albino duck and had beautiful white feathers and such smooth skin....All the guys thought it was fantastic....and as they stood in the middle of junction oval playing with silky there was an eerie silence and then as they all turned to look at the change rooms he appeared Out of his shinny blue car, as he showed off a bit of muscle and a tanned 6 pack, he walked over to the middle of the oval and said: "Oh my god i am soooooo much silkier than that DUCK!" and with that he went into the change rooms to wax his eyebrows!
The boys were now getting quiet sick of their new pet Silky.... sicker than they were of their old pet Silky! and so they decided to go into the change rooms rooms and saw Woey crying in the corner of the rooms. Robbo went up to him and sat next to him and said "Whats wrong little buddy?" and Woey replied "I ran out of wax AND peroxide. This has never happened. what will i do? Robbo put his arm around Woey's shoulder to console him and he said "Mate we all go through hard times, i mean the other day i found out my girlfriend had balls. How do u think i felt?" As the snickers started from the rest of the boys Robbo and Woey than had a deep and meaningful convo which went a little something like this:
Woey: Wow man im sorry. I mean she looks like a man but i never though she really was one
Robbo: Yeah well what can you do? Its better at least now i can break up with her and not feel guilty
Woey: Well look on the bright side. Now that she is gone you can maybe make a move on me
Robbo: Woe! I already told ya man.... it ain't my thing
Woey: Sorry i forget! The loss of peroxide is really getting to me
and put itching powder in his g string...when there was this almighty girly shriek came from the room EEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!! all the guys an to the rooms to see what the commotion was except for Schwarta who was with the duck in the middle of the ground trying to work out how he could make money from it....They got to the Robbo: How about i run off and get you some more wax than?
Woey: Oh that would be great thanks
So with that Robbo got into his car and drove to the nearest chemist. While browsing through the shelves trying to find the most sensitive wax for his buddy's sensitive skin Robbo bumped into OR !!!!!!!!!!!!! lol she was there buying.......LAXATIVES!!!!!!! That’s right. The previous night Or had been out with some friends and eaten some really bad food. Robbo saw and ran up to and said "Oh hey am i glad to see u, the strangest thing happened yesterday" "I was going for a walk with my dog (no not Grgic the other one!) when i bumped into your friend Mishy. She told me that you have apperantly been looking at other players and taking a liking to them is that true?" Robbo asked with tears in his eyes
"Ummm.... all i said was that i like brucey...... please don't be mad i'm still an obsessive freak when it comes to you...... i promise!" Or said in a pleading tone!
"Ok thats fine than.... i was just making sure! Hey while you are here would you like a life anywhere?" Robbo asked
"Training would be good" Or replied
So Or and Robbo got into the car and by this stage Or was very happy and in the process of hypervantilation!
When they got to training the found Schwarta running madly after the little duck who Schwarta discovered couldn't make him rich! Still Schwarta was determined to catch the bastard and at least sell it to some blind kid for a bit of money, and as Schwarta ran after the duck running out of breath he bumped into SAM NEWMAN!! Who was holding a lemon meringue pie. Schwarta just gave him the finger and took the pie and ate it. Then Sam picked up the duck and looked at...and "U IDIOT!" put down the duck and walked away. Schwarta sat down with the pie AND the duck and just ate and he thought. He thought about the past. He thought about the future. He thought about how a roast duck and veggies would taste tonight. So off he went to ring his mum to ask her how to cook roast duck. Sitting on the edge of the oval was the old grand man Stephen Febey he looks at Schwarta, the duck and the pie and says He is nearly as old as me and still needs him mum to cook for him!
As he watched Schwarta walking off with a pie in one hand a the little yellow fluffy duck in the other Febes comes up with an idea.
He decides to organise and big party and invite all the players and lots of single girls. That way Schwarta can find a girl to cook for him and Robbo could find a girl who doesn't have balls and maybe Woey could find a guy... errr... i mean a girl!
So anyways Febes calls his brother and they organise and big huge singles night party down at the pub Schwarta's eyes lite up like a kid at Christmas he thought "Chicks GAWWWWDDD it has been ages. I don’t think i can do it?" Febes looked at him undoubtedly "Of course u can do it. You got more mo jo than Austin Powers!"
So they went to the pub and started to organise the party. All the guys were invited. And a call went out to all the single girls to get down there at 8pm tonight for what was sure to be a full on night of alcohol and well sex! All Schwarta had to do know was get rid of the duck. So he gave it to Greeny, he is known to be an animal lover.
Meanwhile Greeny wanted to come to the party so he decided to leave the silky the ALBINO duck at home.
Everyone arrived one by one... even the players who had partners came and the party was on its way.
While all the guys were dancing away and drinking LOTS of every alcoholic drink known to human kind Chell was sitting in the corner all the alone.
Greeny (the humanitarian! ) walked over and asked him what was wrong.
Chell than said sadly.... I have garlic breath and no one wants to talk to me as Greeny collapsed on the floor because of Chells breath. So everyone rushes over. There were whispers all around "What do we do? What do we do?" and then in bursts MACCA!!!! "I know. I'll give him mouth to mouth!" Then suddenly Greeny jumps up. "I'M OK!" he shouts and then he spots a blonde in the corner and says "But I'd like to give you mouth to mouth" and walks over to her and spends the rest of the night with this mysteriously woman. While at the rest of the party the guys were getting quiet **** faced!
All of a sudden a fight breaks out between Brucey and Tommo. As those two are going for their life no one knows what brought this fight about.
Than suddenly a mysterious black head walks over to the bar and takes out a gun and says "OI! quit that fighting or else !" and because they r pissed as parrots, Schwarta retaliates by saying "Or else waht? u short arsed wimp!" and the guy with the gun goes "Or else ill shoot ya." "Yeah my arse you'll shoot me!" quips Schwarta. The gunman could see the fire in his eyes. "Come on...Who are you gonna shoot? ME?" "No. says the gunman. I'll shoot Woey" as a gasp comes over the crowd, Schwarta just shrugs and as he walks away says "Hmm thats ok then. Just clean up the mess. I dont like it when the pub is messy." as Neita shot a greasy glare towards The Ox, remembering what he did to his house. The gunman reveals all. It is Woeys waxer Or should we say EX-waxer
He than breaks down in tears and tells of the heart breaking story of their relationship and how woey left him for a younger waxer!
The rave music stops (Greeny and Chell ARE NOT happy) and everyone listens to the Wayne the Waxer as Woey makes an escape out the back door.
Woey is distrubed by the whole story. He walks through the dark gutters of South Melbourne when suddenly he sees a small black shadow in the distance. He walks up to it slowly and the QUAAAAACK!!!!! The albino duck jumps out of the shadow chaing Woey back down to the Bay road, and he sees Whitey getting into a cab, so he yell out to him and Whitey sees the duck and jumps into the cab and it speeds off. As it passes the duck, it notices that Whitey is in the cab and it starts to chase the cab. As the cab driver got faster, the duck got faster...there was smoke coming off its feet..There was no escape from this little duck....It took one and a half hours and $150 cab fair to lose him...Whitey breathed a sigh of relief as he climbed out of the cab and into his house where Neita was already home. He apperantly passed out and was now lying on the sofa drooling.....
Whitey started laughing at Neita as he too was D- R- U- N- K until he passed out too and fall on top of Neita.
Their sleep was cut short at 6am when the phone rang.
Neita pushed Whitey off him and picked up the phone.
"HELLO?" Neita said angerly
"Dave its Brad mate.... you know how i took Silky last night from Oxy?"
"Sort of.... i really don't remember much.... well besides that blond chick i was with....... now she was good..... if only i could remember her name"
"DAVE! concentrate this is important..... oh by the way my chick was nice too...... i got her number........."
*Greeny slaps himself as he loses his concentration*
"Ok so anyways..... i took Silky home and left it there but when i got home this morning..... now she was one wild chick.......... IT WAS GONE"
"Oh Mate! you are in big trouble. Listen just come to training this arvo and we'll sort it out ok?" With that Neita hung up the phone and went back to sleep.
Later that afternoon Neita arrived to training with Whitey (this time making sure not to stop for any sort of animal crossing the road..... too bad for the poor seagull! ) and decided to pretend nothing was wrong... when Schwarta showed up, the first thing he did was run over to Greeny to see where the duck was. the thing it, this meant that Schwarta would have to run the whole way across the field to where Greeny and Neita were standing. Because the night before had been a little to eventful for Schwarta, and he was a little bit (a lot!!) hung over, he needed to stop and take a breather after running only 75m.
Once Schwarta got to where Greeny and Neita were standing, Schwarta took a few moments to catch his breath and then began...
"oh brad mate, you have no idea what a night i had! i couldn't sleep coz i missed silky..." Neita interrupted with a bit of a worried voice "aahh, mate, lets discuss the little duck later. we're here to train, and thats what we'll do. i've heard about a bunch of people that have started writing stories about us coz we're doing to ****ty, and thats all they have to do now. so c'mon, lets get stared. "
"Yeah, thats a good idea! we kinda need to pick up and do better, so discussing a silly old duck isn't going to help much. hey Dave?" continues Greeny.
Schwarta looked at the 2 others in disgust. "what is with the 2 of you?? firstly, you used to love SILKY! and secondly, no one, not even Melbourne supporters would write a story about us, coz I'm sure they have better things to do! now, brad mate, tell me where the duck is or I'll." Schwarta couldn't contain himself, and the tears were now crawling slowly down his cheeck.
Whats wrong with him the players thought, this is not the mean Oxy we know... this is like Grgic!
"OI! i know what you are all thinking, but its not what you think it really isn't.... i just want Silky ok? I have this great idea and i think i know excatly how to make a great profit from it" Schwarta said.
Greeny decided to come clean as Neita was just walking away scared of being screamed at for lying to Schwarta and hiding the truth from one of his best buddies.
Schwarta punched Greeny "you idiot! I give you a stupid little duck and you can't look after him? How bloody hard is it to look for a dumb little helpless duck???" Schwarta screamed.
"Errr.... sorry to intrude.... but i think there is something i should tell you...." Whitey interupted as he took a deep breath explained last night events involving the two silkies, himself and the cab.
All the players laughed, they assumed Whitey was drunk and made the whole thing up.
Where's Woey? We'll ask him what REALLY happened! Said Schwarta.
"Hey? Where is Woey? He is never late to training" Said Robbo in a concerned voice. The players started to worry, maybe Whitey wasn't bull****ting and the duck really was this evil creature and Woey really was gone!
After a long talk with Neale and the rest of the coaching staff who assured them Woey was suppose to be coming to training the boys decided it was time to take action so they started training and then Robbo got a phone call from Woey's beautician. He was in tears. "He didnt turn up for his appointment, and he never misses one. We always sit and talk and have a good bitch, but he isnt here" as the beautician starts to hyperventilate." Robbo was devastated. He knew something was fishy. Woey would never miss an appointment with the beautician. Robbo hung up, and said. "That's it, stuff training we HAVE to look for Woey." "And the duck" Pipes Schwarta. The others just roll their eyes, as they walk away............
i am 
