VelvetSledge
Moderator
- May 24, 2007
- 17,495
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- Liverpool FC, Melbourne Storm
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- #1
* CARLTON BLUES
Whilst the scoreline doesn't look too damaging, it's ultimately very deceiving.
This performance would have left a very sour taste in a lot of Carlton fans mouths, who were only rescued from an utter embarrassment by the pathetic kicking for goal from the Dees, who looked to be stuck in 3rd gear.
In perfect timing for us, Harry McKay looks like he's suddenly remembered that he won a Coleman not too long ago and subsequently taught himself how to kick a goal again.
Whilst the effort was obvious, it's the glaring skill errors and crucially bad decision making that's causing Carlton to lose games, and this was very much the case against the Dees. Dropped marks, slipped tackles, kicks to teammates falling well short. It was a comedy of errors.
Six goals in a game of footy with the past two Coleman Medalists and the most recent Brownlow winner delivering it to them is, frankly, unforgivable.
* Carlton.
MELBOURNE DEMONS 8.13 61
def.
CARLTON BLUES 6.8 44
BEST: Cripps, Cerra, Docherty, McKay, Weitering, Kemp
GOALS: McKay 3, Acres, C. Curnow, Fisher
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ESSENDON BOMBERS
Full credit to Norf here, they played like a team possessed and damn near came away with the choccies.
Zach Merrett looked to be on track for 60 touches and 8 goals at quarter time until Liam Shiels quelled his influence somewhat, whilst Nic Martin continues to go unchecked as perhaps the best pure winger in the league.
Starting to think that maybe Norf should just tell Clarko to take the rest of the year off at a "How to Not Be a Massive Racist a-hole" retreat and continue to build with Brett Ratten.
If anyone thinks that we could be fine without Darcy Parish, I implore you to watch the second half from last week. We desperately needed a clearance beast, and were toweled up by the work experience kids. Can't wait to take Wardlaw from Norf in a few years.
Harry McKay made Sam Weideman look like an Under 14s kid with no arms, therefore adding a couple of zeroes to the contract I'm sure we'll offer him.
As I said, full credit to Norf. They tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end, it doesn't even matter.
Lol Norf
ESSENDON BOMBERS 16.9 105
def.
LOL NORF KANGA KANGA KANGA 15.9 99
BEST: Merrett, Martin, Ridley, Caldwell, Perkins, Heppell
GOALS: Langford 4, Perkins, Merrett, Martin, Guelfi 2, Stringer, Menzie, Draper, D'Ambrosio
CARLTON EMERGENCIES: Paddy Dow, Jack Silvagni, Lachlan Cowan, Lachie Fogarty
ESSENDON EMERGENCIES: Nick Bryan, Jake Kelly, Andrew Phillips, Tex Wanganeen
CARLTON OUTS: Jack Silvagni, Lochie O'Brien, Zac Fisher (All omitted), Paddy Dow (Sub)
CARLTON INS: Ed Curnow, Jack Martin, Marc Pittonet
ESSENDON OUTS: Dylan Shiel (Injured), Andrew Phillips (Omitted)
ESSENDON INS: Peter Wright
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LATE CHANGES
CARLTON OUT: Marc Pittonet
CARLTON IN: Jack Silvagni
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Sub to be chosen from the emergency list one hour prior to bounce.
It's incredible to me that Paddy Dow still can't get a starting gig in this Carlton midfield, and what is even more staggering is that he had no takers last year on the trade table. Bizarre. Old mate crazy Vossy decided to take the axe to the chopping block this week and has axed the second coming of Christ for Carlton fans in JSOS, who's been sent to the magoos, alongside Lochie O'Brien and Zac Fisher. Former Sun Jack Martin returns to the senior side, as does the freshly re-signed (four years hahahahaha holy s**t) Marc Pittonet. The much maligned not-as-good Curnow, Ed, gets back into the side in what will likely be one of his last appearances before Voss decides "* it, I'm playing the kids".
There's a lot to be said for the professionalism of players these days, and 2 Metre Peter Wright is a stellar example of that. Taken out with a potentially season ending shoulder injury on the eve of the season, he has somehow gone through surgery, fully rehabilitated, and got the miles in his legs to return to the seniors in only 13 weeks. It's like the rising of Jesus, but Jesus never kicked a bag against the Bulldogs.
Unfortunately, another professional in Dylan Shiel probably pulled the trigger a little early last week and simply isn't ready to go for the game against this mob of arseholes, whilst big red Andrew Phillips won't line up against his old side after getting the boot from the side after another unfortunately poor showing against the Norfies last week.
ROUND 13, 2022
MCG
10/6/22
ESSENDON BOMBERS 7.12 54
def. by
* CARLTON 12.8 80
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ESSENDON GOALS: Draper, Jones 2, Heppell, Shiel, Hobbs
CARLTON GOALS: McKay 3, C. Curnow, Owies 2, Martin, Cripps, Fisher, Silvagni, Cottrell
ESSENDON BEST: Shiel, Ridley, Heppell (dat speech tho), Redman, Merrett
CARLTON BEST: Docherty, Newman, Cripps, Saad, McKay
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CHANGES SINCE LAST TIME:
ESSENDON OUTS: Shiel, Cutler, Kelly, Parish, Jones, Phillips, Waterman, Reid
ESSENDON INS: Weideman, Langford, McGrath, Zerk-Thatcher, Snelling, D'Ambrosio, Menzie
CARLTON OUTS: Newman, Hewett, Newnes, Silvagni, O'Brien, Fisher, Plowman, Marchbank, Durdin
CARLTON INS: Motlop, Pittonet, Cincotta, Weitering, McGovern, Kemp, Acres, E. Curnow
This is probably the most nervous I've been for a game in some time - we have these pricks with their backs against the wall, and if you corner an animal, it'll likely lash out. We just need to be ready with the muzzle.
The word "hate" is strong, and should be seldom used without proper backing to it. In this case, it probably isn't strong enough. This is the biggest rivalry we have. 16 flags each, in a desperate race to be the first to 17. Whilst that likely won't happen this year for either side, we need to put the foot to the throat to this scumrat mob and show them how quickly we've flown past them. No mercy.
Essendon by 20.
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