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Song Contest Part XVI, Host: The Filth Wizard, Theme: How Do I Title This?, Votes Due: Sunday 10pm AEST

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This is for anyone here that listens to or enjoys metal music of any sort. We all know Junkee is a terrible website, but this little "how to get literally anyone into metal" article should give you a chuckle.

If I was trying to get someone into metal I wouldn't be suggesting Emperor, Cattle Decapitation, Eyehategod or most of the suggestions to them. Also the "you might also like" section is a laugh. Did you like Emperor? You might like Mammoth Grinder....... Lolwat? Did you like Mastodon? You might like Death...... Yeah OK?

It reads like someone who enjoys a FFDP song every now and then googling and skim listening through songs.

There's some great tracks in there, but come on. This isn't going to win people over.

 
Or tape them off the radio because it was snowing outside and you didnt have shoes to walk to brashes
Ooohhh...we used to dream of not having shoes to walk to Brash's because it was snowing outside. We used to walk on our hands wrapped in underpants through sleet because we were too poor to get snow.
 

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I just nommed any old shit. Feel dirty.
 
Ooohhh...we used to dream of not having shoes to walk to Brash's because it was snowing outside. We used to walk on our hands wrapped in underpants through sleet because we were too poor to get snow.
You privileged bastard.
We used to have hang by our fingernails from a high voltage powerline on the faint hope a stray gust of wind blew us a few fleeting notes of music from Mrs McGillicuddys AM transistor.
 

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