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The obscure XI's you've always wanted to make but never found the appropriate place thread

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1. Amy Jones
2. Andrew Jones
3. Dean Jones
4. Richard Jones
5. Charles Jones
6. Arthur Jones
7. Geraint Jones
8. Simon Jones
9. Ernie Jones
10. Jeff Jones
11. Prior Jones
1. Joan Hatcher (NZ)
2. Joan Schmidt (AUS)
3. Joan Westbrook (ENG)
4. Joan Alexander-Serrano (USA)
5. Joanne Broadbent (AUS)
6. Joan Davis (ENG)
7. Joana Chanjack (ZIM)
8. Joan Hawes (ENG)
9. Joan Francis (NZ)
10. Joann Vansertime (WI)
11. Joan Lee (ENG) (WK)
 

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Graeme Smith (c)
Mike Smith
Steve Smith
Brun Smith
Robin Smith
Collie Smith
Ian Smith (+)
Jim Smith
David Smith
Mike Smith
Chuck Fleetwood-Smith
 
A Simpsons-related XI

Reg Simpson
Bob Simpson
Reggie Duff
Herschelle
Gibbs (Krusty's first name)
Abraham B de Villiers (Grandpa's first name)
Mr Joe Burns
Greg "Mo" Matthews
Martin Kent (Martin Prince, Kent Brockman)
Bart King (America's greatest cricketer)
Lennie Pascoe
Carl Rackemann (Lennie and Carl)


EDIT: 12th man: Gilbert Jessop (Let's not forget ol' Gil)
 
Last edited:
A Simpsons-related XI

Reg Simpson
Bob Simpson
Reggie Duff
Herschelle
Gibbs (Krusty's first name)
Abraham B de Villiers (Grandpa's first name)
Mr Joe Burns
Greg "Mo" Matthews
Martin Kent (Martin Prince, Kent Brockman)
Bart King (America's greatest cricketer)
Lennie Pascoe
Carl Rackemann (Lennie and Carl)

 

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MY RANDOM CRICKET IDENTITIES FANTASY ELEVEN


Lizelle Lee (South Africa): Well, they say ‘Ladies first’, so I’m going to have Lizelle Lee open the batting for my fantasy team. Lee is currently an opener with Melbourne Renegades in the Women’s Big Bash League. Lee is the only woman known to have made 400 in an innings when she clobbered 427 not out in an Under 19 game in South Africa in 2010-11. She is a solid striker against the new ball and enjoys responsibility.

Gideon Haigh (Australia): The foremost cricket author in Australia, and perhaps the world. Gideon has currently written 29 books about cricket. Gideon’s book reviews in the Allen’s Australian Cricket Annuals were forthright and he never felt as though he had to say something positive about each book he reviewed. He loves his research and has used many words I have had to look up in the dictionary. If I have Gideon as the other opener in my fantasy team I know he will relish the challenge. And if I have him as team captain, I know he can speak well at press conferences.

Nelson Mandela (South Africa): The story goes that when Mandela was released from prison, one of the first things he asked was whether Don Bradman was still alive. This man will be my vice-captain but he could easily assume the captaincy duties if Gideon wakes up sore one morning from having overloaded his vocabulary. After withstanding 27 years in jail, it's unlikely fast bowlers, bouncy pitches and sledging fieldsmen are going to bother this fellow if he comes in at number three. Mandela knows how to persist and win.

Kate Fitzpatrick (Australia): Kate was the first female cricket commentator on Channel 9 back in 1983 and copped a rough induction from most of the blokes. In her autobiography she stated that Richie Benaud was the only one who showed her any dignity. If Kate has withstood the belligerence of Ian Chappell then I feel confident this veteran actress would be able to go in at number four and blunt the bowlers. Kate has played social cricket, is a member of The Primary Club and used to insist that her acting contracts contain no extra work that might interfere with cricket matches, so her love of the game cannot be questioned.

Russell Crowe (New Zealand): Rusty would bring a hard-edged Romper Stomper mentality to this team. He loves his rugby so why wouldn’t he take to cricket? Rusty needs a bit of regular exercise, so he could prove himself a real master and commander with some gladiator-style stroke-play at number five. And don’t forget, Russell does have some cricketing pedigree in his blood as New Zealand’s greatest ever batsman Martin Crowe was his cousin.

John Cleese (England): And now for something completely different. John Cleese has proven himself as an all-round talent in theatre, television, movies and as a writer, so he can be an all-rounder in my team. His long ministry-of-silly-walks stride would help him get forward to any awkwardly spinning deliveries, although it might be interesting to watch him sprint between wickets. His height would bring the ball down from a lofty altitude when bowling. Cleese actually played school cricket and his efforts for Clifton College saw him mentioned in Wisden 1958 and Wisden 1959. He took 40 wickets for Clifton at an average of 15.67 so there wouldn’t be too much Fawlty with his technique.

Wendy Wimbush (Australia): I am designating Wendy as my fantasy team wicketkeeper. Famous for being a scorer, Wendy devoted many hours to watching the game and its tactics, so the bowlers could definitely trust her focus and dedication in watching each ball weave its way down the wicket. Also, constantly watching grown men polish the ball against their groin before they run in to bowl isn’t going to faze her.

Montague Druitt (England): Druitt was a bowler from the 1870s and 1880s who mainly played club cricket for Dorset and later some social games for the MCC. Druitt was a barrister whose social cricket career saw him play with W. G. Grace, Lord Harris and Sir Francis Lacey, the first man knighted for services to cricket. Druitt later became a suspect in the Jack the Ripper trials in 1888 so he must have a good cut shot. Whoops, is that insensitive?

Tommy Simsek (Sri Lanka): remember when Sri Lanka last toured Australia and they had that team physio who would always sprint from the boundary out to the middle and back again? Well Simsek is that guy. He is enthusiastic and is used to coming in off a long run and so I will make him a fast bowler in my team. He is a physio so he should always be fit and will know how to get over any injuries.

Dwayne Leverock (West Indies): was Dwayne an unfulfilled talent? I think Dwayne could have really prospered from more international opportunities so I am giving him a place in my team. Dwayne could run off the kilos and perfect his craft by flighting his spinners in tireless and dedicated bowling spells. Would you refuse Dwayne if he approached you and asked for a spot in your fantasy team? Or for a spot at the dressing room dinner table?

Michael D’Angelo (England): I reckon D’Angelo would make a good medium-pace bowler in my team. When he became Test cricket’s first streaker at Lord’s in 1975, he jumped over the stumps and landed unscathed on the other side, so he knows how to take care of swinging balls, if you know what I mean. And he knows how to show some cheek, if you know what I mean.



12th Man: Billy Birmingham (Australia): who better to be 12th man than The Twelfth Man himself? Every team needs a lively lad or prankster in the dressing rooms, so Billy could keep the team spirit alive and healthy. He is well-versed in cricket culture as is evidenced with his pronunciations of surnames from non-English speaking countries. Who would have thought Peanut Butter Jars was a foreign name?
 
Can someone make me the best side where all the batsmen have a first class 300 and all the bowlers have taken 10 wickets in an innings? Just a random thought I had but can't be bothered putting it together.
That's a helluva an ask, even a 300 and 10 wickets in a match finds you breathing pretty rarefied air.
 

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That's a helluva an ask, even a 300 and 10 wickets in a match finds you breathing pretty rarefied air.
Well, I happened to know that Australians Brayshaw, Grimmett and Mailey have done the 10, so we've got the medium and the 2 leggies; just need a couple of quicks now.
 
WG took ten of the eleven wickets to fall in that innings.

Just one of those things that is stuck in the dark recesses of my mind.
Why were there 11 wickets? Playing against a 12?
 
Well, I happened to know that Australians Brayshaw, Grimmett and Mailey have done the 10, so we've got the medium and the 2 leggies; just need a couple of quicks now.
Hadlee make 12th man for 9 wickets, and catching the last bloke?
 

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The obscure XI's you've always wanted to make but never found the appropriate place thread

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