Media Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 37

[Tonga Bob]

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We love qumpires. Like simmers, match posters, Committee members, club captains, stats collectors and Mrs Turbo the qumpires do a thankless task that is either criticised or ridiculed. But not here at Bob's Stats. Here we celebrate qumpires, and for the eighth season running Bob's Stats proudly* presents The Free Kick Table (as opposed to The Freaky Table which is where the goth kids sat and ate lunch in those high school films)! As tradition dictates, here's what this is all about:

"Free kicks are a very emotive topic in football, however it seems that the 'random' nature of qootball displaces that emotion from umpires to the sim. One way to look at this is a free kick differential, which aggregates free kicks over a period of time and shows which teams receive more than others.

My Free Kick Table takes this one step further, and aggregates the impact of free kicks on a game-by-game basis to see who won the free kick count in each game. So pretty much what would happen if you replaced goals and points scored with free kicks received and conceded."

I know this is the WIIFM Generation, so this is the WII (Bear Grylls approved). The team that finishes the home and away season on top of the Free Kick Table wins the coveted Silver Whistle Trophy. And those individuals that catch the eye of the qumpires for either good or bad reasons will be in the running for individual gongs such as the Little Spoon Trophy for the player with the most free kicks received in the season or the Big Spoon Trophy for the player that concedes the most frees in the season. The participation prize is admiring the snazzy way I present all of this to you, the appreciative reader.

So without any further ado, or any ado whatsoever, welcome to the Free Kick Table for Season 37!

 

[Tonga Bob]

Here's the updated season board up from when I joined the league (ie: when the league really started) until the end of last season.

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[Tonga Bob]

Now please enjoy a smorgasbord of free kick tables over the years, starting with the first one in season 29 which the Roys took out:



Season 30 belonged to the Gumbies:

Media - Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 30

I learned many things about the SFA last season: That it exists; That it's a community of many campaigners with many different personalities from all walks of life (and that's just TJASTA); That the sim is an evil sentient genius that, underneath its randomness has patterns that it forms; That...

www.bigfooty.com

Roy reclaimed the throne with an absolute drubbing in season 31:

Media - Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 31

*fanfare noises* Hello nerds. Welcome back here to the SFA, and welcome to our rookie group for the very first time. The municipality of Sweet is buzzing in anticipation in this the first round of season 31! There's a lot to get excited about - the banter, the camaraderie, the quality media...

www.bigfooty.com

Then it was the Furies' turn in season 32:

Media - Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 32

Hello nerds! In what has quickly become a highlight of the SFA season, Bob's Statistics (a division of Bob's Shitpostsᵀᴹ) is once again delighted to present to you the Free Kick Table for season 32! For those of you that are either new to the SFA or have repressed any memory of its existence...

www.bigfooty.com

The Bombers reigned supreme in season 33:

Media - Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 33

Yo nerds, guess what? [unrealistic pause for a reply that will never come] I may be with captaincy this season, but that's not gonna stop me from getting back on my bullshit by giving you the stats that you neither requested nor craved. That's right - the Free Kick Table returns for season 33...

www.bigfooty.com

Before Mount Buller took over in season 34:

Media - Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 34

We're back, babey!!!!! That's right, one of Sweet's longest currently running statistically-laden media pieces is now in its fifth season as the Free Kick Table returns for season 34 thanks to the good person at Bob's Statistics (a division of Bob's Shitpostsᵀᴹ)!!! Here's the now customary...

www.bigfooty.com

Then the Swamprats had a turn in season 35:

Media - Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 35

You said it, Ray. I'm sure that you're pleased to find out I'll be doing my now adored and highly anticipated* Free Kick count in season 35. Six seasons deep, this piece of media buffoonery comes to you from thanks to the good person at Bob's Statistics (a division of Bob's Shitpostsᵀᴹ)...

www.bigfooty.com

And finally in season 36 the Silver Whistle made its way to Coney Island:

Media - Bob's Stats - The Free Kick Table For Season 36

free kick (noun - /ˌfriː ˈkɪk/): in football, an opportunity to kick the ball without the other team getting involved, allowed when a player from the other team has not obeyed one of the rules. How good are rules hey nerds? They frickin' rule!!!! pun absolutely intended Welcome back to the...

www.bigfooty.com

But wait, there's more! Here's a consolidated table for all free kick results in the past eight seasons:

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[Tonga Bob]

A montage of Silver Whistle celebrations:



A litany of Little Spoon recipients:



And a bevy of Big Spooners:

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[Tonga Bob]

Yes you can post here Jabba73

 

[Tonga Bob]

View attachment 1895157

Here's the updated season board up from when I joined the league (ie: when the league really started) until the end of last season.

View attachment 1895160​

Taggy McTagface for the previous winners so they can bask in the glory of this bad boy being rolled out again. So here's to you Loonerty Elton Johns Wig Robertio MP_ Millky95 Cap Pugsley StFly Bradesmaen Brick Loosener damicky moginie Wosh tigs2010 ClarkeM Senor M zackah

 

[Loonerty]

I'm back for my prize

 

[Pugsley]

I was more of a thug when I played in the backline.

 

[Millky95]

View attachment 1895157

Here's the updated season board up from when I joined the league (ie: when the league really started) until the end of last season.

View attachment 1895160​

Finally some good ******* content

 

[Mrs Turbo]

Like simmers, match posters, Committee members, club captains, stats collectors and @Mrs Turbo the qumpires do a thankless task that is either criticised or ridiculed.

Finally, I feel seen and understood. Thank you Tonga Bob

Now if someone could just work on Turbo's hearing....

 

[Tonga Bob]

Finally, I feel seen and understood. Thank you Tonga Bob

Now if someone could just work on Turbo's hearing....

We see you.

 

[Tonga Bob]

Morning nerds, time to take a look at what the qumpires were up to in round 1. Apart from doing the worm of course.



The Furies (+66 points & +10 frees) & Swamprats (+64 points & +9 frees) either brought their own qumpires to their home games or the qumpires were influenced by the affirmation noises of the home crowds, as both teams had the biggest qooty wins and the biggest free kick differentials of round 1. The Dragons (+43 points & +7 frees) managed to smuggle qumpires into the Golden Throne, while the Roys (+22 points & +3 frees) were the other team that received qumpire assistance albeit lessened by the bad weather. This is all laid out in the Ladder Variance of 0.92, showing that the qooty & free kick ladders are vary close together.

The Bombers (-14 points & +2 frees) and the Bears (-11 points & +1 free) were however unable to take advantage of the rub of their particular greens. Sucks to be them.

Now over to the individual stuff.

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Bomber ex-parrot norway blue has shot out of the gates of the Little Spoon race with 8 frees for in the opening round, closely followed by Sinner BloodySwan (7) and the trio of Greenery King Tenz & Shueygod (6 each).

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Some decent numbers in the Big Spoon early doors also, with Wonder Marklar_33 and Swamprat ruckcapybara GremioPower in the lead after conceding five frees each. A group of five players are one kick behind, including SaintsSeptember Smartys Power Ticky009 Zevon and perennial Friend of the Free Kick Table Millky95.

Well that's it for round one. Will the Furies & Swamprats continue their early form, or will the likes of the Roys & Dragons go to the next gear? My money's on the latter, given the comments from their milestone having Grand Poobah:

I intend to intimidate the umps with my stature and standing within the online football supporting community. Guard your knackers well.

I will guard my knackers well Chief. I really really will.

Until next week nerds.

 

[Braklet]

Morning nerds, time to take a look at what the qumpires were up to in round 1. Apart from doing the worm of course.

View attachment 1901540

Yo Bob, yer table don't line up with the official S37R01 stats:



Perhaps you're funning us, if so HA HA.

 

[Tonga Bob]

Yo Bob, yer table don't line up with the official S37R01 stats:

View attachment 1902051

Perhaps you're funning us, if so HA HA.

I’m a benevolent host my long distance friend, so I will give you some time and a bit of music to read through the whole of the fred in order to see the difference between my table and the official one.

 

[Braklet]

I’m a benevolent host my long distance friend, so I will give you some time and a bit of music to read through the whole of the fred in order to see the difference between my table and the official one.

Nah, too much work. Please draw me a nice picture in crayon.

 

[Tonga Bob]

Howdy nerds, I'm one of many around here that has sketchy interwebs after the storm activity of the week, so let's just get straight to the monkey...



The ladder has a certain symmetry to it. There's four unbeaten teams still, three of which (Swamprats, Bombers & Bears) are two from two while the Furies had a bye to go with their one win. There's also four teams without a win, three of which (Warriors, Demons & Royals) are Owen Two while the Gumbies had a bye to go with their one loss. Finally there's a chunk of five teams in the middle with an even record at this early juncture.

Spoons?

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norway blue & BloodySwan have extended their top two places in the Little Spoon. The Bomber got 5 more frees for while the 'Rat picked up four more. Hawk MP_ has slid up to third place on 9 frees for, two behind the Sin Citizen, while his teammate Rankine2Rachele joins another Bomber in Bovo in equal fourth on 8 frees.

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Not a lot of bags in the Big Spoon, so the field has very much bunched up together. A pair of Sinners in GremioPower & Ticky009 are joined in the lead on six conceded frees by Coney Island great TheInjuryFactory . Right on their proverbial heels are a group of ten other campaigners on five frees against - Millky95 Scythe94 Irish BlueBagger Nothing SaintsSeptember FootyGuy13 Footypie32 freo84 Marklar_33 & Zoops

That'll do for this week, hopefully the UberStarlinkdish wallah arrives before next week to give me back my good internet. Later nerds.

 

[BloodySwan]

Guess I'm quickly becoming the Joel Selwood of SFA

 

[MP_]

This is why I’m so good at werewolf games because I’m a great at fooling everyone even the umpires

 

[Nothing]

View attachment 1906459

Howdy nerds, I'm one of many around here that has sketchy interwebs after the storm activity of the week, so let's just get straight to the monkey...

View attachment 1906464

The ladder has a certain symmetry to it. There's four unbeaten teams still, three of which (Swamprats, Bombers & Bears) are two from two while the Furies had a bye to go with their one win. There's also four teams without a win, three of which (Warriors, Demons & Royals) are Owen Two while the Gumbies had a bye to go with their one loss. Finally there's a chunk of five teams in the middle with an even record at this early juncture.

Spoons?

View attachment 1906478​

norway blue & BloodySwan have extended their top two places in the Little Spoon. The Bomber got 5 more frees for while the 'Rat picked up four more. Hawk MP_ has slid up to third place on 9 frees for, two behind the Sin Citizen, while his teammate Rankine2Rachele joins another Bomber in Bovo in equal fourth on 8 frees.

View attachment 1906480​

Not a lot of bags in the Big Spoon, so the field has very much bunched up together. A pair of Sinners in GremioPower & Ticky009 are joined in the lead on six conceded frees by Coney Island great TheInjuryFactory . Right on their proverbial heels are a group of ten other campaigners on five frees against - Millky95 Scythe94 Irish BlueBagger Nothing SaintsSeptember FootyGuy13 Footypie32 freo84 Marklar_33 & Zoops

That'll do for this week, hopefully the UberStarlinkdish wallah arrives before next week to give me back my good internet. Later nerds.

If the umpires blew the staging frees I'd be ok. Instead I breathe on some pleb and they fall down like a sack of spuds.

Hopefully tony doesn't duck and dive.

 

[TheInjuryFactory]

Coney Island great @TheInjuryFactory

 

[DragoDelph]

Wait… is that Jizzlord??

 

[TheInjuryFactory]

Wait… is that Jizzlord??

Against my better judgement I just googled that...

 

[MP_]

Against my better judgement I just googled that...

Have you googled Slovakian traffic cone by any chance?

 

[TheInjuryFactory]

Have you googled Slovakian traffic cone by any chance?

Will look it up next week. More of a Horn of Plenty man myself.

 

[DragoDelph]

Against my better judgement I just googled that...

Hey, Extraordinary is a GREAT show