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Club Legend
Melbourne Demons - Jake Lever Player Sponsor 2018
Melbourne Demons - Katherine Smith AFLW Player Sponsor 2018
Unofficial Preview of the Year
Melbourne Demons - Ben Kennedy Player Sponsor 2017
Melbourne Demons - Katherine Smith AFLW Player Sponsor 2017
Melbourne Demons - Ben Kennedy Player Sponsor 2016
Melbourne Demons - Jeremy Howe Player Sponsor 2015
Melbourne Demons - Dom Barry Sponsor 2014
The following is inspired by this thread
With the mining boom over, West Australian investors began to look elsewhere. I was appointed by the MFC to attend a meeting with the West Coast Eagles’ Chief Financial Officer, Alan McNesbett. My phone conversation with Peter Jackson had been hurried, but I’d managed to catch the words ‘corporate takeover’ and ‘buyout’.
I met McNesbett outside Subiaco. He shook my hand and ushered me inside the ground.
‘Our club has a strong corporate history. The Messages on Hold strategy netted over $16 million per goal last year, and the cheersquad’s ‘S-G-I-O GO EAGLES GO’ chant is a hit with both kids and insurance bankers alike.’
He held the door open to me and we walked past a gleaming gymnasium. On the walls inside the gym were mid-sized posters of former Eagles champions alongside gigantic posters of former CFOs. A space, by far the biggest of the whole collection, had been reserved on the far wall for McNesbitt.
We continued walking and McNesbitt kept talking. ‘We’re thought leaders in the football business. Did you know we’re the only club actively seeking to insert subliminal advertising into our game-day operations? Although, I must admit, the drafting of Michael Coca-Cola has so far proved a real challenge. But we’re persisting.’
We continued down the corridor past the gleaming premiership cups of ‘92, ‘94 and ‘06. The cabinet stretched the length of the hallway and had enough spots for at least sixty more cups.
‘Here, let me show you something,’ said McNisbett as he shepherded me into his office. He pointed to a chair opposite his desk. I sat down while he rummaged through a filing cabinet.
On the wall was a large poster:
‘Hey, that looks kind of familiar,’ I said, pointing to the poster.
‘That? Oh yes, our intern Jamie did that for us. Looks good, doesn’t it?’
‘I have to be honest, Alan,’ I said. ‘The whole thing smells a bit off to me.’
‘The whole thing is financially sound,’ he said. ‘Of course, we’ll have to write off a few of your liabilities, but with the amount of capital we have we expect to be turning a profit in two years.’ He laid the manila folder in front of me.
I looked down at the file, which presented our club’s financial situation.
Assets
- Jesse Hogan
- MCC/MCG
Liabilities
- See Appendix A through Q
‘But,’ McNesbitt continued, ‘we feel that the charity of acquiring an operation such as yours will help the public perception of our club having a heart, something we’ve been sorely lacking for thirty years.’
I looked up from the file. ‘I can’t argue with the maths,’ I said. ‘But something doesn’t quite feel right. I guess I’m just worried this takeover will sell us out, and debase the history of my once proud club.’
‘Nonsense,’ said McNisbett. ‘We have the utmost respect for your organisation. And I do hate the word takeover. Here, listen to this, we even mocked up a club song for you that will celebrate our new … partnership.’
He opened iTunes and double clicked a file by a band called ‘The Jakovich Singers’. A thudding bass drum filled the room, followed by a throaty chant.
Hey Demons! Hey Demons!
Flag flying hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh
Flag flying hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh
[drum solo]
It’s an old flag, the grandest old flag, and we’re here, to see it fly
It’s an old flag, the grandest of old flags,
We’re the Demons, flag flying high
I pulled out my pen. ‘Where do we sign?’
Demons by 30 million dollars.
With the mining boom over, West Australian investors began to look elsewhere. I was appointed by the MFC to attend a meeting with the West Coast Eagles’ Chief Financial Officer, Alan McNesbett. My phone conversation with Peter Jackson had been hurried, but I’d managed to catch the words ‘corporate takeover’ and ‘buyout’.
I met McNesbett outside Subiaco. He shook my hand and ushered me inside the ground.
‘Our club has a strong corporate history. The Messages on Hold strategy netted over $16 million per goal last year, and the cheersquad’s ‘S-G-I-O GO EAGLES GO’ chant is a hit with both kids and insurance bankers alike.’
He held the door open to me and we walked past a gleaming gymnasium. On the walls inside the gym were mid-sized posters of former Eagles champions alongside gigantic posters of former CFOs. A space, by far the biggest of the whole collection, had been reserved on the far wall for McNesbitt.
We continued walking and McNesbitt kept talking. ‘We’re thought leaders in the football business. Did you know we’re the only club actively seeking to insert subliminal advertising into our game-day operations? Although, I must admit, the drafting of Michael Coca-Cola has so far proved a real challenge. But we’re persisting.’
We continued down the corridor past the gleaming premiership cups of ‘92, ‘94 and ‘06. The cabinet stretched the length of the hallway and had enough spots for at least sixty more cups.
‘Here, let me show you something,’ said McNisbett as he shepherded me into his office. He pointed to a chair opposite his desk. I sat down while he rummaged through a filing cabinet.
On the wall was a large poster:
‘Hey, that looks kind of familiar,’ I said, pointing to the poster.
‘That? Oh yes, our intern Jamie did that for us. Looks good, doesn’t it?’
‘I have to be honest, Alan,’ I said. ‘The whole thing smells a bit off to me.’
‘The whole thing is financially sound,’ he said. ‘Of course, we’ll have to write off a few of your liabilities, but with the amount of capital we have we expect to be turning a profit in two years.’ He laid the manila folder in front of me.
I looked down at the file, which presented our club’s financial situation.
Assets
- Jesse Hogan
- MCC/MCG
Liabilities
- See Appendix A through Q
‘But,’ McNesbitt continued, ‘we feel that the charity of acquiring an operation such as yours will help the public perception of our club having a heart, something we’ve been sorely lacking for thirty years.’
I looked up from the file. ‘I can’t argue with the maths,’ I said. ‘But something doesn’t quite feel right. I guess I’m just worried this takeover will sell us out, and debase the history of my once proud club.’
‘Nonsense,’ said McNisbett. ‘We have the utmost respect for your organisation. And I do hate the word takeover. Here, listen to this, we even mocked up a club song for you that will celebrate our new … partnership.’
He opened iTunes and double clicked a file by a band called ‘The Jakovich Singers’. A thudding bass drum filled the room, followed by a throaty chant.
Hey Demons! Hey Demons!
Flag flying hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh
Flag flying hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh
[drum solo]
It’s an old flag, the grandest old flag, and we’re here, to see it fly
It’s an old flag, the grandest of old flags,
We’re the Demons, flag flying high
I pulled out my pen. ‘Where do we sign?’
Demons by 30 million dollars.
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