Certified Legendary Thread Sympathy for *essendon - congratulations on '16 Wooden Spoon (RIP The Scales)

[GarnerSmash]

Not so much a bus as a road train that he has thrown them under. One of the wheels is bound to hit someone.

The bloke has been caught out by his own massive intellect (cough). In his defence it is REALLY hard to work out if a drug is banned. It's so hard it needs its own instruction manual. I have taken the liberty of copying it verbatim here:

1. Open browser.
2. Type https://checksubstances.asada.gov.au into the address bar.
3. Press Enter (recent addition to the Drugs for Dummies version of the manual)
4. Enter the sport, gender, and role. Click "Check". Be truthful here please Dyson...
5. Read the terms and conditions (you don't need a lawyer for this *jimmy), and click "I Accept"
6. Type "thymosin beta 4" into the "how would you like to cheat?" field.
7. Cross fingers and press the Search button.
8. Click the link to to drug shown (you probably mis-spelled it, and Thymosin Beta 4 could easily be confused with Thymomodulin ).
9. Read the results. Drugs for Dummies Hint: the red X means "banned", not "okay", you sillies.

The good news is that if you don't like the result, you can go ahead anyway. After all whatever you want to cheat with probably isn't performance enhancing. Or maybe those clowns at ASADA just got it wrong?

Shake head vigorously, tut a couple of times, mumble something under you breath, and head to the fridge to check you stocks. Now jab away at leisure with your pin-cushion/*player of choice.

Oh, and write it all down. Or not.

Disco

 

[Devington]

It's a private hearing. The result likely won't be made public until later in the evening.

It will be leaked within seconds.

Surely * or the AFL have set up a liveleak Twitter a/c.

Technically they can't. There is 21 days of confidentiality, unless the people involved waive the right. Or something like that.

 

[LuvtheKangas]

Danksy is a crackup. "The players are innocent!!!"

Why is that mate?

"Because the drug that we didn't give them shouldn't be banned by WADA!!"

Ok. Lets just ignore the utter stupidity of that position and focus on the banned/not banned question. Who determines what is banned/not banned? World leading biochemists and anti-doping experts?

"Yeah but I'm an anti-ageing expert with questionable qualifications. What would they kno?"

It would have more credibility if he had held that line throughout, but he hasn't. Every so often, he tries to argue they didn't get TB4, then a few months later, it is the "shouldn't be banned" argument.

I only know him through this process, but Dank strikes me as an absolutely s**t bloke. Thinks he's smarter than everyone else, and tries to maintain this sophisticated "I know more than you do" facade every time he talks, hinting that what he knows will exonerate and vindicate them all. But he's got nothing and everyone knows he's got nothing. The time to play that card passed long ago, so mate, everyone knows you're not holding it.

I'm looking forward to him to being penalised more than the *players and nearly as much as the *club.

 

[ShinbonerBaz]

It would have more credibility if he had held that line throughout, but he hasn't. Every so often, he tries to argue they didn't get TB4, then a few months later, it is the "shouldn't be banned" argument.

I only know him through this process, but Dank strikes me as an absolutely s**t bloke. Thinks he's smarter than everyone else, and tries to maintain this sophisticated "I know more than you do" facade every time he talks, hinting that what he knows will exonerate and vindicate them all. But he's got nothing and everyone knows he's got nothing. The time to play that card passed long ago, so mate, everyone knows you're not holding it.

I'm looking forward to him to being penalised more than the *players and nearly as much as the *club.

Sums up my feelings about Dank very nicely

 

[LuvtheKangas]

You have one idiot who is an * fanboi, and you have the other idiot who sold his integrity up the river by parroting the opinions of the executive producer, who is also an * fanboi. Best football show going around? No.

Yep, 100%. Whately would be good - he's intelligent and he knows his football - but for being a spineless sycophant who has resigned himself to presenting the party line. The fact that we can all see he is uncomfortable with it doesn't excuse him, IMO.

 

[GarnerSmash]

It would have more credibility if he had held that line throughout, but he hasn't. Every so often, he tries to argue they didn't get TB4, then a few months later, it is the "shouldn't be banned" argument.

I only know him through this process, but Dank strikes me as an absolutely s**t bloke. Thinks he's smarter than everyone else, and tries to maintain this sophisticated "I know more than you do" facade every time he talks, hinting that what he knows will exonerate and vindicate them all. But he's got nothing and everyone knows he's got nothing. The time to play that card passed long ago, so mate, everyone knows you're not holding it.

I'm looking forward to him to being penalised more than the *players and nearly as much as the *club.

Totally agree.

He seems to have been running around sporting organisations telling all and sundry just how ******* good he is after making his name in the anti-ageing industry, an industry in which ego and pomp rule supreme.

He may have been the smartest bloke in rooms filled with air headed bimbo's and charlatan doctors, but he has right royally ****ed up this time.

 

[Grogg]

It's a damn shame penalised doesn't mean what I used to think it meant. If anybody deserves a penalising then Jim and Danksy come on down.

campaigners.

 

[GarnerSmash]

Imo i still think he was trying to make a legal version of TB4 he would only have TB4 in his possession to look at it's properties not actually inject into players.

Oh yes, indeed...

 

[Devington]

Oh yes, indeed...

I posted this on the HTB as well, in his defence I remember there being theories that Dank was trying to Frankenstein together HGH using grey area supplements with a GP prescription to make it all legit. That poster isn't the smartest tool in the shed though, I must admit. He doesn't seem like a dick though, which counterpoints a few of their posters.

 

[Wild Bill]

Dank is going to sue the afl, Asada and *essendon.

*essendon posters read the article

"Dank is going to sue the afl, Asasda and Caro"

Wtf??? Idiots

 

[muttley45]

Old mate Danksy was looking a nice shade of orange on tonights news bulletin, ? self medicating

 

[Arden]

Old mate Danksy was looking a nice shade of orange on tonights news bulletin, ? self medicating

Spike says it is just vitamin C

 

[Devington]

Spike says it is just vitamin C

Just because it made you orange, doesn't mean it came from one Spike.

 

[TennisPlayerAndy]

Just because it made you orange, doesn't mean it came from one Spike.

Multiple spikes I'd imagine.

 

[Kimbo]

He seems to have been running around sporting organisations telling all and sundry in Sunbury just how ******* good he is after making his name in the anti-ageing industry, an industry in which ego and pomp rule supreme.

efa

 

[Kimbo]

Spike says it is just vitamin C

Yeah, I always get 'amino acids' and 'ascorbic acid' mixed up too.

 

[Nate7]

So games involving * aren't showing up on tab sportsbet!

#Sympathyforessendon

 

[TooUglyForFugly]

So games involving * aren't showing up on tab sportsbet!

#Sympathyforessendon

No point letting people bet on $1.01 odds I guess.

 

[Phillyroo]

So games involving * aren't showing up on tab sportsbet!

#Sympathyforessendon

What are they paying for the spoon???

 

[Nate7]

No point letting people bet on $1.01 odds I guess.

Yeah but it would've helped in my multi bet.

 

[Nate7]

What are they paying for the spoon???

Not offering that, BUT, "least wins without Essendon" is showing StK and then a very long way to GoDees.

There's also, "will a team go through winless?" - $17
Will a team score more than 200 points in a game - $3.50

 

[Heaps of fun]

Christmas Eve.

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

They're going to get off. No justice in the world. None.

 

[Only Forwards]

They're going to get off. No justice in the world. None.

Where you getting this from?

 

[TooUglyForFugly]

He has my gut feeling?