Troy Selwood RIP

[chaddy22]

Tragic news. , Dale Tapping has also passed away at age 59. assistant coach at 3 clubs , lost his battle with cancer. May they both RIP. Condolences to both the Selwood and Tapping families and close friends.

Terrible day for the footy community.Brad Hardie mentioned on 6PR that some bad news was about to break but didn't want to mention what it was. I thought it was the Tapping story but know we know about Troy it is even more sadder.
My thoughts with both families.

 

[Snarls Barkley]

A far too common story. Very, very sad.

Don’t have the answers but more needs to be done.

 

[Jibroni]

Very sad news, I'm sure he was loved by his family and teamates.

Thoughts and prayers for the family.

 

[kickazz]

This country woefully underfunds mental health support.

Yeah, and we are such a wealthy country too. I guess no votes in it?

 

[kickazz]

Suicide is a massive problem, especially for men. We need to normalise men talking about their problems and their feelings as I think it is still somewhat of a taboo, which really contributes to certain groups of men feeling very alone and like they cannot talk to anyone.

It still really is a taboo. Despite what people say.

RU OK? Was still thrown around as a joke on this forum in recent years. And in all the years of "RU OK day" at work, well let's just say we still have a "don't ask, don't tell" attitude to this sort of thing.

The rhetoric and the reality couldn't be further apart.

 

[Tbonefreo]

Heart breaking

 

[TheEscapeClub]

R.I.P. and condolences to his family and friends.

 

[Tbonefreo]

It still really is a taboo. Despite what people say.

RU OK? Was still thrown around as a joke on this forum in recent years. And in all the years of "RU OK day" at work, well let's just say we still have a "don't ask, don't tell" attitude to this sort of thing.

The rhetoric and the reality couldn't be further apart.

Yep bang on.

At my workplace it has had an opposite effect, and people take the piss out of r u ok day. It's brutal.
So many people threaten to jump off the cyclone clusters and it's still the same attitude.

 

[MC Extra Dollop]

It still really is a taboo. Despite what people say.

RU OK? Was still thrown around as a joke on this forum in recent years. And in all the years of "RU OK day" at work, well let's just say we still have a "don't ask, don't tell" attitude to this sort of thing.

The rhetoric and the reality couldn't be further apart.

R U OK? has its place in my opinion, but to throw yellow balloons and cupcakes at the epidemic once a year is not going to be effective. It's an every day thing, building those relationships (especially with work colleagues) where a degree of trust is developed where one person can respond honestly to the question and the other can provide the appropriate support, whether it's just an attentive ear, or someone to provide active help. It requires people to park their work for 10 minutes and just go out for a coffee (and for other people in the office to not roll their eyes), to not see a message in Teams from someone you haven't been in touch with for a few weeks and immediately think, "I wonder what they need me to do for them?" It requires people to not feel like bludgers if they have an answer besides "Flat out" to "How's work going?"

Troy Selwood always seemed like one of the good guys of footy. He was a huge part of the development of Geelong's young players during the 2010s and he had a key role in developing so many of Geelong's young draftees into 2022 premiership players.

Gutted by this news. Rest in peace.

 

[iameviljez]

I also think as a society we are just meaner to.

Only need to read comments in random FB feeds and even on here when you have differing views and its just a cesspool of mean spiritedness for those who don't agree and get personal and then we wonder why suicide is rife in Australia particularly with younger people thorugh social media and generally online and personal bullying.

Its one area as a society I don't think we've improved on.

People get much, much meaner when they think they are safe, and even worse when they think they are completely anonymous.

To be fair, this has always been the case. Social media just makes it worse

 

[iameviljez]

R U OK? has its place in my opinion, but to throw yellow balloons and cupcakes at the epidemic once a year is not going to be effective

RUOK's job is to nudge a door open. If it then reminds people to make time to catch up with their closest friends, I'm all for it.

 

[SuperSteele22]

Suicide is a massive problem, especially for men. We need to normalise men talking about their problems and their feelings as I think it is still somewhat of a taboo, which really contributes to certain groups of men feeling very alone and like they cannot talk to anyone.

You're absolutely right but the problem is we're the way we are due to several generations of conditioning to 'man up' and get on with it. Not necessarily a switch that can be flicked overnight

 

[MC Extra Dollop]

RUOK's job is to nudge a door open. If it then reminds people to make time to catch up with their closest friends, I'm all for it.

Yeah I understand. I just think it should be the other way around: build the relationships and trust first and then you'll get the meaningful conversations when someone asks that question.

 

[Strange Cat]

Terrible news

 

[Toump Ass]

How's the Murdoch headline... "family ripped apart!"
What a bunch of campaigners.

RIP Troy.
Mental Health is no joke. I'm so sorry you had such a struggle.

Look after yourself peeps. No shame in asking for help, everyone needs a hand sometimes.

 

[Woodson]

Never pleasant to hear of such early lives cut short. Not the first in these days of *********

R.I.P.

Witness Statement doco 2025

greening22 asked a simple question that got rubbished in 2021.

 

[RUNVS]

You're absolutely right but the problem is we're the way we are due to several generations of conditioning to 'man up' and get on with it. Not necessarily a switch that can be flicked overnight

I think things are improving, albeit slowly.

I remember this tweet from a while ago but it is very true



and it is a good thing that men in general are more able to express their feelings these days than in the past. I hope it continues and Gen Z men feel like they are allowed to tell people they love them and can go to family and tell them they are struggling.

If every generation gets a bit better it will help a lot.

 

[undefined]

The pain and suffering this young man must have gone through to get to this point.. it's utterly heartbreaking. Those whom have fought extended such crises are ****ing heroes as far as I'm concerned. All levels of Government need to address the inadequate funding relative to disease burden that mental health presents in this country. It's getting out of hand.

 

[MC Extra Dollop]

How's the Murdoch headline... "family ripped apart!"
What a bunch of campaigners.

RIP Troy.
Mental Health is no joke. I'm so sorry you had such a struggle.

Look after yourself peeps. No shame in asking for help, everyone needs a hand sometimes.

ABC too FFS. Rest in Peace, 'brother of Joel'.

 

[Achy Blakey Heart]

You're absolutely right but the problem is we're the way we are due to several generations of conditioning to 'man up' and get on with it. Not necessarily a switch that can be flicked overnight

Some good points being made, but as a professional who has worked with people with severe mental ilness for 2 decades, having been involved in the postvention of over 30 suicides..... i can tell you its not just the issue of 'manning up' anymore.

This is old thinking now. Men and women have very different experiences of life in our western society, each with unique challenges. But for men they often sit in a challenging space, where being a man is almost a taboo, the identity of men has been so distorted that many don't know who they are or who they are supposed to be. This demonization i see time and time again, is juxtaposed with the modern demands on men, required to do so much for their family, work endlessly to provide for them, often to only be criticized for who they are. They withdraw from social networks, friends etc, due to the demands elsewhere and become intensely lonely. Add in divorce, parental alienation, financial ruin etc and you have a recipe for suicide.

We have to find a way to lift up men in our society so they can be proud of what they are.

 

[Achy Blakey Heart]

ABC too FFS. Rest in Peace, 'brother of Joel'.

That is appalling.

 

[voorhees]

terribly sad news.
condolences to the selwood family

 

[CuttlefishMcfly]

Such sad news… One of the most positive and fun loving lions player. I never thought this would ever happen. Sorry for your loss. Prayers to the children and family.

 

[jannissary]

devastated.

 

[kickazz]

The demonisation of "men" is such a myth, usually used by mens rights groups who dislike that women now have equal rights.

The bolded part - that happens, yes. There is an entitlement that is not being overcome.

But I think the first part missed the mark. I don't know if I'd say men are so much demonised these days, but what is and isn't on the list of what makes "a good man" is a bit confusing for young men now, there is evidence of this.

We are creating new norms around gender roles/identity for society (which is good), but we are slow to let go of some of the old ones. It's complicated, but the one aspect I have seen in my lifetime is the impact of health (particularly mental health) on the ability to earn an income. My anecdotal experience is that men seem to be given a lot less time to recover and go back to earning, before their partners leave them, than the other way around. This is just anecdotal but the numbers may support it, not sure. But it aligns with my thoughts that we are moving in the right direction on some aspects quicker than on others, and this can create some internal conflict.