Crows Footy Finals Knockout Competition.

[raboyle]

Bloke walks into a psychiatrist's joint one day... he gets called into the office and sits on the couch.

Doc: "Now what seems to be the problem sir?"
Bloke: "My problem is that all I can think about is sex. No matter where I am or what I am doing I seem to only think about sex and it's stuffing up my home and social life."
Doc: "I see. Well, what I'll do is draw some pictures and show them to you and we'll see what happens.

So the doctor gets out his large note book and starts to sketch. He finishes off and shows it to the bloke.

Doc: "OK sir, what do you think?"
Bloke: "Sex.... sex! HAHAHA boobs... arse! Sex!!"
Doc: "OK... lets try this."

He gets out the pad again and starts sketching again.

Doc: "Right... how about this time?"
Bloke: "Ahhh... f**k t*ts!!! SEX!"

The Doctor was wondering what to make of this nut... but went back to the pad anyway.

Doc: "Alright sir... what about this one?"
Bloke: "SEX!!!! Naked chicks! Bare bitch-ass!! SEEEEEEEXXX!"

The Doc looked at him in disgust and said "Oh for crying out loud... your are just a sex maniac!" The bloke sat up and retorted "What? Hey come on... Its you who's drawing all the filthy pictures!"

 

[lozstar]

Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.
Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Woman: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite
stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving
license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license.

He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Woman: Bet you the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too.

 

[DaveW]

Gee lozstar, you've certainly taken to this thread.

And you've turned on your (old?) club too!

Meanwhile, I can't believe there are no joke emails in my inbox.

 

[lozstar]

Originally posted by DaveW
Gee lozstar, you've certainly taken to this thread.

And you've turned on your (old?) club too!

Meanwhile, I can't believe there are no joke emails in my inbox.

oh shoosh
i get sent too many joke emails, so eh, thought i'd put 'em to good use!

 

[sapaul]

Originally posted by DaveW
Gee lozstar, you've certainly taken to this thread.

I think Loz did 4 jokes, wonder if that means she can have 4 tips in the first week of the finals.

 

[macca23]

Subject: The Plan


In the beginning was the Plan.

And then came the Assumptions.

And the Assumptions lacked form, and the Plan was without substance.

And the darkness was upon the face of the employees.

And they spoke amongst themselves saying,

"It is a crock of sh*t and it stinketh."

And the employees went unto their supervisors saying,

"It is a barrel of dung and none may abide the odor thereof."

And the supervisors went unto their managers saying,

"It is a container of excrement and very strong. such that none may abide by it."

And the managers went unto their Division managers saying,

"It is a vessel of fertilizer and none may abide its abundant strength."

And the Division managers went unto their System managers saying,

"It contains that which aids plant growth and is exceedingly strong."

And the System managers went unto the General manager saying,

"It promotes growth and is very powerful."

And the General manager went unto the Board of Directors saying,

"This asset is substantive and actively promotes growth and efficiency."

And the Board looked upon the new Plan and saw that it was good.

And the Plan became policy!

This is how sh*t happens.

 

[Blues_Girl]

Originally posted by lozstar
oh shoosh
i get sent too many joke emails, so eh, thought i'd put 'em to good use!

One of which I was going to use

 

[Damp Squarie]

topjars
fitzy's_eyes
Jars 458
Kane McGoodwin
macca23
raboyle
sapaul
napsyd
stiffy_18
lozstar

Any more for "ring" side seats
Get em while they're hot

 

[raboyle]

A man in South Africa owns 20 elephants. One day he's herding them into a new field and they all have trunks holding tails like circus elephants.

While doing this they have to cross a railway line... as the last one crosses the track a train comes and hits it killing it stone dead. So the man sues the rail company for 20 times the amount of one elephant because when the train hit the last one it pulled the a***holes out of the other 19.

Sick joke that one innit?

 

[DaveW]

The beautiful secretary of the president of the Chase Manhattan Bank goes to a sight-seeing tour with a very rich Taiwanese client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him.

Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her. Don't reject the guy outright. So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her. So, after a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75 carat diamond ring, with a matching 200 carat diamond tiara."

The Taiwanese man pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says "No problem!! I buy. I buy."

Realizing that her first condition was too easy, the woman says to the man, "I want you to build me a 100 room mansion in New York. As a vacation home, I want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine country in France."

The man pauses for awhile. He whips out his cellular phone, calls some brokers in New York, then he calls some brokers in France. He looks at the woman, nods his head and says, "Okay, okay. I build, I build."

Realizing that she has one last condition, the secretary knows that she'd better make this a good one. She takes her time to think and finally, she gets an idea. A sure-to-work condition. She squints her eyes, looks at the man and says, rather coldly, "Since I like to have sex, I want the man, I marry to have a 12-inch penis."

The man seems a bit disturbed. He cups his face with his hands and rests his elbows on the table. All the while, he's muttering something in Chinese. Finally, after what seemed like forever, the man shakes his head, looking real sad, says to the woman, "I cut. I cut."

 

[MarksGirl-kbcrowgirl]

A Port supporter is killed on his way home from the footy.

He approaches Peter at the pearly gates.

Peter "Who are you and why should you be allowed into heaven"

Port Supporter "Well I am a good, honest person I have done many things for the community"

Peter "such as"

Port Supporter "I donated $50 to the Red Cross, $50 to the Salvation Army & $50 to St Vinnies"

Peter, sat and thought about it for a moment, then motioned to the Angels "Give this man back his $150 and tell him to #$%^ off, Crows supporters only in heaven"

k
xx

 

[crowsfan]

Here's my submission, which in no way is meant to offend anyone at all.

An Aussie, American and Irishman were in the final round of the Sale of The Century.

Glen Ridge, the host, asks the final question: "Where did Old McDonald keep all his animals? I want you to first state the answer, then spell it."

The Aussie buzzes first and says, "Station, S-T-A-T-I-O-N."

"That is incorrect," says Glen, and the American quickly buzzes in with his answer, "Ranch, R-A-N-C-H."

"I'm sorry, that answer is also incorrect" replies Glenn.

Finally the Irishman buzzes and gives his answer, "Farm, E-I-E-I-O."

 

[Damp Squarie]

LOL...Some damn top jokes there.

topjars
fitzy's_eyes
Jars 458
Kane McGoodwin
macca23
raboyle
sapaul
napsyd
stiffy_18
lozstar
DaveW
MarksGirl-kbcrowgirl
crowsfan

Anymore for anymore

 

[Kane McGoodwin]

Blond Joke Shockers

> ENGINE TROUBLES
> A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic,
> "It died." After he works on it for a few minutes, it's idling
> smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in
> the carburettor." She says, "How often do I have to do that?"
>
> -----
> EXPOSURE
> A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her
> right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says,
> "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
> She says, "Why, officer?" "Because your breast is hanging out."She
> looks down and says, "OH MY GOD, I left the baby on the bus again!"
>
> -----
> KNITTING
> A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
> Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind
> the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his
> flashing lights and siren,the trooper cranked down his window,
> turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULLOVER!" "NO," the blonde
> yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
>
> -----
> BLONDE ON THE SUN
> A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
> The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
> The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
> The Blonde said, "So what, we're going to be the first on the sun!"
> The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their
> heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said
> the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you
> know. We're going at night!"
>
> ----
> SPEEDING TICKET
> A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very
> nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish
> you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away
> my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
>
> ----
> THE VACUUM
> A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She
> rolled the dice and she landed on "Science & Nature." Her question
> was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you
> hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
>
> ----
> FINAL EXAM
> The blonde reported for her university final examination that
> consists of "yes/no" type questions. She takes her seat in the
> examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes,and
> then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and
> starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet "Yes" for Heads
> and "No" for Tails. Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the
> rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes,
> she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.
> The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on. "I
> finished the exam in half an hour, but I'm rechecking my answers."
>
> ----
> THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
> There was a blonde woman who was having financial troubles so she
> decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local
> park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this
> note. "I have kidnapped your child. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown
> bag behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow at 7 A.M. Signed,
> The Blonde". She pinned the note inside the little boy's jacket and
> told him to go straight home. The next morning, she returned to the
> park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag, behind the big oak tree,
> just as she had instructed. Inside the bag was the following note...
> "Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do this
> to another!"

 

[Kane McGoodwin]

Two old men decide they are close to their last days on earth and decide to have a last night on the town.
After a few drinks they end up at the local brothel. The madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, "go up to the first two rooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk, I'm not wasting two of my girls on them. They won't know the difference."

The two men go up the stairs and take care of their business.
As they are walking home the first one says, "You know, I think my girl was dead!" "Dead?" says his friend, "why would you think that?" "Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her."

His friend says, "I think mine was a witch." "A WITCH!!! Why the
hell would you say that?" "Well, I was making love to her, kissing on her neck and I gave it a little bite, then she farted and flew out the window.

 

[marvin]

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night . . . whether you're here or not."

 

[macca23]

This guy has always dreamed of owning a Harley Davidson. One day he has finally saved up enough money so he goes down to
the dealer. After he picks out the perfect bike, the dealer tells him about an old biker trick that will keep the chrome on his new bike free from rust. The dealer tells him that all he has to do is to
keep a jar of Vaseline handy and put it on the chrome before it rains, and everything will be fine.

A few months later, the young man meets a woman and falls in love. She asks him to come home and meet her parents over dinner. He readily accepts and the date is set. At the appointed time, he picks her up on his Harley and they ride to her parent's house.

Before they go in, she tells him that they have a family tradition that whoever speaks first after dinner does the dishes. After a delicious dinner everyone sits in silencewaiting for the first person to break the silence and get stuck doing the dishes.

After a long fifteen minutes, the young man decides to speed things up, so he reaches over and kisses his woman in front of
her family. No one says a word.

Emboldened, he slips his hand under her blouse and fondles her
breasts. Still no one says a word. Finally, he throws her on
the table and has sex with her in front of everyone. No one says a word.

Now he is getting desperate, so he grabs her mother and throws HER on the table. They have even wilder sex. Still no one speaks.

By now he is thinking what to do next when he hears thunder in the distance.

His first thought is to protect the chrome on his Harley, so he
gets his jacket, reaches in his pocket and pulls out his jar of Vaseline.

The father says, "Okay dammit, I'll do the dishes!

 

[macca23]

PERSONAL ADS EXPLAINED
WOMEN'S ADS
40-ish.................................. 49
Adventurer............................. Slept with all your friends
Athletic.................................No ****
Average looking...................... Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful................................Pathological liar
Contagious Smile.................... Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated................................ Banged her Political Science professor
Emotionally Secure................. Medicated
Feminist.................................Fat ball buster
Free spirit..............................Junkie
Friendship first.........................Trying to live down reputation as a ****
Fun......................................Annoying
Gentle...................................Comatose
Good Listener......................... Borderline Autistic
New-Age............................... All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned......................... Lights out,missionary position only,no BJs
Open-minded.......................... Desperate
Outgoing.................................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk
Poet.....................................Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional.............................Certified Bitch
Redhead................................. Bad dye-job
Reubenesque........................... Grossly Fat
Romantic.................................Looks better by candle light
Social...................................Been passed around like an hors doeuvres tray
Voluptuous.............................. Very Fat
Weight proportion w/ height... Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate.................... Stalker
Widow................................. Drove first husband to shoot himself
Young at heart...................... Old bat


MEN'S ADS

40-ish...................................52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic.................................Watches a lot of footy
Average looking..........................Unusual hair growth on ears,nose,& back
Educated.................................Will patronize the **** out of you
Free Spirit..............................Banging your sister/mother/daughter
Friendship first.........................As long as friendship involves nookie
Fun......................................Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking.............................Arrogant
Very good looking........................Arrogant and dumb as a board
Honest...................................Pathological Liar
Huggable.................................Overweight and more body hair than a bear
Likes to cuddle..........................Insecure mama's boy
Mature...................................Older than your father
Open-minded..............................Wanted to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested
Physically fit...........................Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Poet.....................................Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a toilet wall s
Sensitive................................Cries at chick flicks
Very sensitive...........................Gay
Spiritual................................Got laid in a cemetery once
Stable...................................Arrested for stalking, but not convicted
Thoughtful...............................Says "Excuse me" when he farts
Considerate..............................Takes dirty dishes out of sink before peeing in it.

 

[macca23]

An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall.
A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair all different colours - green, red, orange, blue, and yellow.
The old man just stared.
The young man said, "What's the matter, old timer? Never done anything wild in your life?"
The old man replied, "Got drunk once and rooted a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son".

 

[PAfolwr]

Three men were sitting in the maternity ward of a hospital waiting for the births of their children. One is a Port supporter, one a Crows supporter and the other a Tongan. They are all very nervous and pacing the floor.

All of a sudden, the doctor burst through the double doors saying,
"Gentlement, you won't believe this but your wives have all had their babies within 5 minutes of each other".

The men are beside themselves with happiness. "And," said the doctor, "they have all had little boys".

The fathers congratulate each other over and over. "However we do have a slight problem," the doctor said. "In the confusion, we may have mixed up the babies getting them to the nursery and we would be grateful if you could join us there and try to help us identify them".

With that, the Port supporter raced past the doctor and bolted to the nursery. Once inside he picked up a dark skinned infant with dreadlocks saying, "There's no doubt about it, this boy is definitely mine."

The doctor looked bewildered and said, "Well sir, of all three babies, I would have thought that this child could be of Tongan descent."

"You could be right" said the Port supporter, "But one of the other two is the son of a Crows supporter and I'm not taking the risk".

 

[noddy]

Gotta admit i did borrow this from someone else (a pap site)

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danny Frawley: The chicken crossed the road and got hit by a bus, it tried hard to get across the road but the bus was bigger, I think we can all take some positives out of the chicken trying to cross the road.

Leigh Matthews: The chicken had to cross the road because it was not eligible to stay on its side of the road because the AFL changed the father son criteria and its father was on its side of the road.

Dean Laidley: I dont really care about whether the chicken crossed the road or not , I just want it to get a little more angry about what its doing and as long as it knows its my way or the highway it can cross the road whenever it likes.

Mick Malthouse: The chicken was slow but the road was patient.

Grant Thomas: We have no comment about the chicken and it crossing the road we just told it that we expect 100% commitment to this club and anything less wont be tolerated, we gave the chicken some life counselling and it decided to cross the road which I think is in the best interests of the club.

Steven Lawrence: But Grant there was this bloody chicken cro.........

Eddie McGuire: Of course the chicken is going to cross the road when the AFL are giving the other side of the road more food to feed it, why wouldnt it cross the road. Did I mention Collingwood, Collingwood, there I mentioned it.

Nathan Buckley: Who Cares, what about me, i crossed the road to the shops the other day and i bought the papers and walked home again.

Shane Warne: Was it naked?

Phillip Ruddock: Anyone who conspired to help the chicken escape from and cross the road from its detention centre will be dealt with severley.

Bruce: Oh yes i saw it, it was SPEEESHHALLL, it walked a bit like WAYNE it was inspiring stuff.

Simon Beaumont: It stopped in the middle too , the middle is the bit in between the side it came from and the side its going to.(Bit like december for you Beauey)

Kevin Sheedy: It didnt cross the road the aliens came down and beamed it across the road.

Travis Johnston: @#%$ did it it cross the road did it, thats 10 grand ive just done, get me my phone, wheres beasleys number, why couldnt it just stay on its side for one more day, never listen to swhatta and his sure things.

David Hookes: I cant beleive you guys, some filthy hairy backed chicken crosses the road and it makes news for you lot.

Dennis Pagan: No, Well look the way we see it the chicken is going to take time to cross the road, we just need all our chickens lovers to be a bit more patient with the chicken.

Chris Connelly: "We're just trying to build a chicken that will be crossing the road successfully for years to come. We're not worried about how its crossing now."

Mark Williams: "I've had about a gutfull of the chicken! We don't do things like that at Port Adelaide and its about time you Victorians stopped talking about chickens and paid more respect to Port. I swear we're gonna win a final this year! Mark my words!

"Mike Sheehan: I think it was about time the chicken crossed the road, what do you think Gerard?

Gerard Healy: I'm not too sure about what it was doing crossing the road but surely it deserved a free kick!

Malcolm Blight: That is the worst chicken I have ever seen cross the road.

Arnold Schwarzenegger: The chicken will be back.

Osama Bin Laden : The chicken was an infidel!

George Bush: Make no mistake about it, the chicken will succeed in crossing the road.

Mark Williams: Our chickens are capable of crossing the road better than that. But the opposition chickens crossed the road in very ugly fashion. In the process, their flooding tactics made our chickens look ugly crossing the road.
It wasn't our chicken's fault. Blame the opposition chickens

 

[sapaul]

Originally posted by topjars

The cost to join this elite competition is

1.You must be a Crows Supporter.

PAflower trying to tell us something?

 

[Damp Squarie]

topjars
fitzy's_eyes
Jars 458
Kane McGoodwin
macca23
raboyle
sapaul
napsyd
stiffy_18
lozstar
DaveW
MarksGirl-kbcrowgirl
crowsfan
marvin
noddy

...Gettin close to a full-house (of sin)

 

[PAfolwr]

Re: Re: Crows Footy Finals Knockout Competition.

Originally posted by sapaul
PAflower trying to tell us something?

That I'm not feeling well?

 

[iceman21]

Originally posted by noddy
Gotta admit i did borrow this from someone else (a pap site)

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danny Frawley: The chicken crossed the road and got hit by a bus, it tried hard to get across the road but the bus was bigger, I think we can all take some positives out of the chicken trying to cross the road.

Leigh Matthews: The chicken had to cross the road because it was not eligible to stay on its side of the road because the AFL changed the father son criteria and its father was on its side of the road.

Dean Laidley: I dont really care about whether the chicken crossed the road or not , I just want it to get a little more angry about what its doing and as long as it knows its my way or the highway it can cross the road whenever it likes.

Mick Malthouse: The chicken was slow but the road was patient.

Grant Thomas: We have no comment about the chicken and it crossing the road we just told it that we expect 100% commitment to this club and anything less wont be tolerated, we gave the chicken some life counselling and it decided to cross the road which I think is in the best interests of the club.

Steven Lawrence: But Grant there was this bloody chicken cro.........

Eddie McGuire: Of course the chicken is going to cross the road when the AFL are giving the other side of the road more food to feed it, why wouldnt it cross the road. Did I mention Collingwood, Collingwood, there I mentioned it.

Nathan Buckley: Who Cares, what about me, i crossed the road to the shops the other day and i bought the papers and walked home again.

Shane Warne: Was it naked?

Phillip Ruddock: Anyone who conspired to help the chicken escape from and cross the road from its detention centre will be dealt with severley.

Bruce: Oh yes i saw it, it was SPEEESHHALLL, it walked a bit like WAYNE it was inspiring stuff.

Simon Beaumont: It stopped in the middle too , the middle is the bit in between the side it came from and the side its going to.(Bit like december for you Beauey)

Kevin Sheedy: It didnt cross the road the aliens came down and beamed it across the road.

Travis Johnston: @#%$ did it it cross the road did it, thats 10 grand ive just done, get me my phone, wheres beasleys number, why couldnt it just stay on its side for one more day, never listen to swhatta and his sure things.

David Hookes: I cant beleive you guys, some filthy hairy backed chicken crosses the road and it makes news for you lot.

Dennis Pagan: No, Well look the way we see it the chicken is going to take time to cross the road, we just need all our chickens lovers to be a bit more patient with the chicken.

Chris Connelly: "We're just trying to build a chicken that will be crossing the road successfully for years to come. We're not worried about how its crossing now."

Mark Williams: "I've had about a gutfull of the chicken! We don't do things like that at Port Adelaide and its about time you Victorians stopped talking about chickens and paid more respect to Port. I swear we're gonna win a final this year! Mark my words!

"Mike Sheehan: I think it was about time the chicken crossed the road, what do you think Gerard?

Gerard Healy: I'm not too sure about what it was doing crossing the road but surely it deserved a free kick!

Malcolm Blight: That is the worst chicken I have ever seen cross the road.

Arnold Schwarzenegger: The chicken will be back.

Osama Bin Laden : The chicken was an infidel!

George Bush: Make no mistake about it, the chicken will succeed in crossing the road.

Mark Williams: Our chickens are capable of crossing the road better than that. But the opposition chickens crossed the road in very ugly fashion. In the process, their flooding tactics made our chickens look ugly crossing the road.
It wasn't our chicken's fault. Blame the opposition chickens

You forgot what Gary Ayres would have said
" The chicken certainally went through the process of crossing the road which, when it comes down to it , is certainally what were about when it comes to the process of crossing roads"