Health Depression

[Genghis Tron]

Look at the post again. Im laughing at it. The next post was srcsm/tongue in cheek.

Fair enough, my bad. Just see it a lot where people who suffer make a joke and then get blasted for not understanding what it's like to suffer by people that have NFI (not you clearly). Just sick of it. Who are they to take away someone's coping mechanism you know?

Bigfooty needs a sarcasm font.

 

[Shell]

Fair enough, my bad. Just see it a lot where people who suffer make a joke and then get blasted for not understanding what it's like to suffer by people that have NFI (not you clearly). Just sick of it. Who are they to take away someone's coping mechanism you know?

Bigfooty needs a sarcasm font.

It takes alot to offend me via joke.


Alot.

 

[Cuzz09]

Fair enough, my bad. Just see it a lot where people who suffer make a joke and then get blasted for not understanding what it's like to suffer by people that have NFI (not you clearly). Just sick of it. Who are they to take away someone's coping mechanism you know?

Bigfooty needs a sarcasm font.

sarcastica

 

[Deliverance]

Yep

And you dont know the person.. hypothetical he could have been abused everyday of his childhood and uses drugs to escape that.

Most addicts have a history of serious trauma.

 

[Shell]

Most addicts have a history of serious trauma.

Exactly.

We need better help/services in this area. But then again, if ppl really dont want to change/get off them, you cant make them.

 

[NonPhixion]

This is the best video I’ve come across on the subject. A very smart, humble guy with some wise words

 

[MP_]

Has anyone had to forgive themselves for doing something really bad. How do you do it? 18 months has passed and I’m still can’t forgive myself and I know it’s the one thing hold me back from feeling normal again. I feel like if I forgive myself I’m saying that it was ok what I did, which it wasn’t .

 

[Metalcrusher]

Has anyone had to forgive themselves for doing something really bad. How do you do it? 18 months has passed and I’m still can’t forgive myself and I know it’s the one thing hold me back from feeling normal again. I feel like if I forgive myself I’m saying that it was ok what I did, which it wasn’t ☹.

You sir seem to need a consequence to validate/right your feelings. I feel you have already had a consequence to that decision. You need to forgive yourself, accept the events that unfolded because of that bad decision. Remember, good people make bad choices and that does NOT make them a bad person.

I can garner that you feel remorse, otherwise you would not have opened with "doing a bad thing", that is a great step, acceptance. What you are facing now is the guilt (self imposed), you need to work through that with a professional.

It is ok to forgive yourself but not lessen the impact/result of the initial decision. You need to understand the ramifications of said decision had on others. Put yourself in their shoes and understand how they felt. If you can do that, that is the path to remorse and a willingness to make amends. It shows empathy. Through that channel you will be able to forgive yourself.

PM me if you feel the need.

 

[mouncey2franklin]

Has anyone had to forgive themselves for doing something really bad. How do you do it? 18 months has passed and I’m still can’t forgive myself and I know it’s the one thing hold me back from feeling normal again. I feel like if I forgive myself I’m saying that it was ok what I did, which it wasn’t ☹.

What did you do? It probably wasn't even that bad.

 

[Caesar]

Has anyone had to forgive themselves for doing something really bad. How do you do it? 18 months has passed and I’m still can’t forgive myself and I know it’s the one thing hold me back from feeling normal again. I feel like if I forgive myself I’m saying that it was ok what I did, which it wasn’t ☹.

Forgiveness is a loaded word - if you prefer, think of it as letting go of what is done and unable to be changed.

Recognise that self-flagellation is an indulgence - a way of making us feel like we are evening the score a bit for our misdeeds without actually doing anything. If you are genuinely remorseful, the best way to atone is to make better decisions. To do that, you need to focus your energy on the future - not wallowing in guilt over the past.

If you were the kind of person you want to be, what would you do today? Do that.

 

[Deliverance]

Has anyone had to forgive themselves for doing something really bad. How do you do it? 18 months has passed and I’m still can’t forgive myself and I know it’s the one thing hold me back from feeling normal again. I feel like if I forgive myself I’m saying that it was ok what I did, which it wasn’t ☹.

I guess the other option if you can't let it go is, can you do something to make amends? Repay a moral "debt" in a sense.

 

[ash_1050]

Has anyone had to forgive themselves for doing something really bad. How do you do it? 18 months has passed and I’m still can’t forgive myself and I know it’s the one thing hold me back from feeling normal again. I feel like if I forgive myself I’m saying that it was ok what I did, which it wasn’t ☹.

Try writing a letter to the person/people that you hurt. The act of writing it out and expressing everything that's tied up inside you definitely helps, as you're letting it out. Don't send the letter though would be my advice, either keep it in a drawer or burn it, whichever seems more therapeutic.

Additionally as Deliverance said try do something that helps you to feel like you're making amends for your previous actions.

Alternately therapy is another option to explore as well if there's unresolved trauma you're not able to move on from.

 

[Shell]

Just my 2 cents- i was srsly upset at my faculty leader. No goodbye no send off, after 14 years nothing. Anyway i wrote an email conveying my feelings (polite tho swearing or anything) slept on it. Woke up (finished my novel on 9/11 i was reading ) and suddenly my whole perspective changed instantly. I deleted the email.

 

[Engimal v3]

Told work I want to resign today without having a new job lined up. Don't know if it's a bad decision, but really hate it. My partner is in support and I have enough savings to last a while. Just can't do this job anymore.

 

[Cuzz09]

You spend so much of your life at work you need to do something you enjoy or at least isnt gonna drive you bonkers

 

[Coolangatta]

I'm ashamed that when I was a teenager, I let people push me around and ended up humiliating myself in front of dozens of peers which was a traumatising moment for me. I learned through reflection and these harsh experiences to become assertive. I used to act so stupidly to impress a bunch of people I thought were "cool." People can change a lot over 15 years. It used to bug me that most of the people who haven't seen me in a long time might assume I haven't, but I realised it doesn't matter what they think. But the trauma will always be there; it still gets to me, the shame of feeling emasculated, and of acting stupid. I'm glad I never adopted a "tough guy" persona to try and atone for it, the people who do are probably damaged in some way by things that have happened to them.

 

[Engimal v3]

Just my 2 cents- i was srsly upset at my faculty leader. No goodbye no send off, after 14 years nothing. Anyway i wrote an email conveying my feelings (polite tho swearing or anything) slept on it. Woke up (finished my novel on 9/11 i was reading ) and suddenly my whole perspective changed instantly. I deleted the email.

Would you know, today I had a call with my boss and withdrew my resignation. Had a good sleep Friday night (fell asleep before 1am for the first time in ages) and woke up Saturday full of regret. I think there's issues inside myself (anxiety, mood swings) that I should be trying to address first before quitting job.

He was glad to have me back. Sometimes I hate the work, but the people I work with are great and have my back.

 

[Run n Spread]

Well a day laying in my own vomit means surely can't get worse. Anti D's are too hard on the gut as well as some booze.
Feel just flat. My mind is so slow at the moment. Can't focus properly. Don't know what I need. So many things running through my head can't rest

 

[Shell]

Take care RnS. Things srsly may not end well if you're drinking heavily.

 

[Run n Spread]

Thanks need time to reset and get my head straight. But have too much going on and no where to go atm. More I do worse things get. Now it's holidays everyone away and no one to speak to.
World seems to be passing me by atm. Can't shake things. Just want Christmas over and to go somewhere away. Sick of myself and everything at the moment

 

[Run n Spread]

Just my 2 cents- i was srsly upset at my faculty leader. No goodbye no send off, after 14 years nothing. Anyway i wrote an email conveying my feelings (polite tho swearing or anything) slept on it. Woke up (finished my novel on 9/11 i was reading ) and suddenly my whole perspective changed instantly. I deleted the email.

That's sad. But who knows why people behave like they do.

Would you know, today I had a call with my boss and withdrew my resignation. Had a good sleep Friday night (fell asleep before 1am for the first time in ages) and woke up Saturday full of regret. I think there's issues inside myself (anxiety, mood swings) that I should be trying to address first before quitting job.

He was glad to have me back. Sometimes I hate the work, but the people I work with are great and have my back.

That's good. Not sure what you do or why you resigned but if you enjoy your job and want to continue good on you.

 

[Run n Spread]

Has anyone had to forgive themselves for doing something really bad. How do you do it? 18 months has passed and I’m still can’t forgive myself and I know it’s the one thing hold me back from feeling normal again. I feel like if I forgive myself I’m saying that it was ok what I did, which it wasn’t .

Without knowing what you did exactly it's hard to say. Unless we are talking dead body style bad you need to find a way to come to terms with yourself look at what caused the action and see if you can snap the pattern and not put yourself in a position like it. No one has a time machine you just move on for the better

 

[Run n Spread]

I'm lost. I really need a rehab or retreat of somewhat but can't get away. I'm stuck nearly called triple 0 on myself yesterday nearly collapsed going to the shops. Those I was talking to professionally have taken till Jan 11 off.
Others are just stressing me further. Don't want to have to face anyone over Christmas but some people don't know when to back off.
This has been happening for years and years. And now I've fallen in a hole at the worst possible time. Technically I'm on holidays and should be happy. Just can't get through a full day. I might need a day or 2 camping hotel without any wifi phone. Just me and nature. Anyone know good options?
I don't know how I got in this position. Might just accept this is my life and deal with it

 

[Cuzz09]

go to your areas botanical gardens. Relax. fresh air. good long slow walk around.

 

[Perth gal]

I'm lost. I really need a rehab or retreat of somewhat but can't get away. I'm stuck nearly called triple 0 on myself yesterday nearly collapsed going to the shops. Those I was talking to professionally have taken till Jan 11 off.
Others are just stressing me further. Don't want to have to face anyone over Christmas but some people don't know when to back off.
This has been happening for years and years. And now I've fallen in a hole at the worst possible time. Technically I'm on holidays and should be happy. Just can't get through a full day. I might need a day or 2 camping hotel without any wifi phone. Just me and nature. Anyone know good options?
I don't know how I got in this position. Might just accept this is my life and deal with it

Please just call lifeline or go to the emergency department.