Roast HUN: Essendon Power Rankings

[Jade]

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/sport/a...-2014-afl-season/story-fni5f3gz-1226836114941

What. The. Holy. ****.

Foot Soldier - Tom Bellchambers
Foot Soldier - Cale Hooker

Are you ****in yanking me?

Bellchambers would be in the top handful of ruckmen in the league, and Hooker is either #1 or very close to it for cutting off opposition attacks in the league.....

 

[Doss]

What do you reckon, Jade?

Want me to add the 'roast' prefix? It would be appropriate, that's absurd.

 

[Whispering_Jack]

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/sport/a...-2014-afl-season/story-fni5f3gz-1226836114941

What. The. Holy. ****.

Foot Soldier - Tom Bellchambers
Foot Soldier - Cale Hooker

Are you ****in yanking me?

Bellchambers would be in the top handful of ruckmen in the league, and Hooker is either #1 or very close to it for cutting off opposition attacks in the league.....

Lol

Courtenay Dempsey

Age: 26 Games: 88 Position: Ruck

 

[loopy_cam]

I don't think it's too bad. I would have Heppell in the stars and Hooker there as well. Possibly even Hibberd in the guns section. Other than that looks ok. Suffers mostly from the names of the categories. Bellchambers would be a level below Ryder I reckon.

 

[Jade]

What do you reckon, Jade?

Want me to add the 'roast' prefix? It would be appropriate, that's absurd.

For sure.

I don't know how you can be paid for this s**t and not get the fundamentals right....

The HUN - masters of saying heaps whilst saying nothing at all.

 

[VelvetSledge]

And halfway through the article:

DONS TO MONITOR DRUG EFFECTS

 

[Jade]

I don't think it's too bad. I would have Heppell in the stars and Hooker there as well.

Agreed. In six months we might be ready to call him elite; not quite there yet.

Possibly even Hibberd in the guns section. Other than that looks ok. Suffers mostly from the names of the categories. Bellchambers would be a level below Ryder I reckon.

Not so sure anymore, Bellchambers is bloody effective and incredibly consistent.

Good problem to have though, trying to figure out which you value higher.

 

[Whispering_Jack]

I don't think it's too bad. I would have Heppell in the stars and Hooker there as well. Possibly even Hibberd in the guns section. Other than that looks ok. Suffers mostly from the names of the categories. Bellchambers would be a level below Ryder I reckon.

Yeah, I'm not sure how a second year giant like JD can be considered 'at the crossroad' but he is probably in that group of players yet to cement their spot, they could have categorised it all better.

 

[JD11]

Ehh, it's okay.

Though I resent Fletch ever being called a 'foot soldier'...

The man is one of the all time greats FFS. But yeah let's put him in the same category as Bags and Pears...

 

[Whispering_Jack]

Ehh, it's okay.

Though I resent Fletch ever being called a 'foot soldier'...

The man is one of the all time greats FFS. But yeah let's put him in the same category as Bags and Pears...

That's why it's dumb though, it's too narrow. I think it's a dumb exercise to categorise a list into 5 different groups, it's a long read and says not much.

 

[Doss]

I have a big soft spot for Tayte Pears, but after all his injury troubles in recent years, describing him as a "key pillar" of our defence in recent years doesn't really work for me, either.

 

[Whispering_Jack]

I have a big soft spot for Tayte Pears, but after all his injury troubles in recent years, describing him as a "key pillar" of our defence in recent years doesn't really work for me, either.

Lol I missed that That's a seriously average article!

 

[Kong]

Lol

Courtenay Dempsey

Age: 26 Games: 88 Position: Ruck

This isn't as bad, but:

Ben Howlett

Age: 25 Games: 76 Position: Forward

 

[Ben the Gooner]

He's a forward according to Champion Data for some bizarre reason. 4 goals from the midfield in Rd 1 = forward I guess.

 

[Pweter]

Apparently Myers isn't a contested ball winner. It must be some other bloke in the number 23 that I see getting a ball in a contest, lifting his arms, then staying upright when 3 guys can't bring him down and getting a handball out. He does alright in the quick kick out of a contest too.

But that's not Myers apparently.

 

[Ben the Gooner]

Is this like the defender David Myers who'd really love to play midfield one day?

 

[Pweter]

Is this like the defender David Myers who'd really love to play midfield one day?

If you mean KPD David Myers, yep that's the one.

 

[Lord Nicholson]

You lost me at HUN

 

[Loonerty]

You've all ignored the biggest piece of WTF in the article.

At 20 years old, as a key position forward, Joe Daniher's career is at a CROSSROADS.

 

[Loonerty]

Also a pretty impressive effort I think by young Orazio Fantasia. Has played 8 games before round 1. That's some ****ing commitment.

 

[Jade]

You lost me at HUN

Much as you know it's coming, I must admit it's frustrating that this inept rag has PAID employees putting this s**t out.....

 

[Whispering_Jack]

You've all ignored the biggest piece of WTF in the article.

At 20 years old, as a key position forward, Joe Daniher's career is at a CROSSROADS.

The classifications were too narrow and just plain dumb. It's a paper filler, nothing more.

 

[Bomberblitzer]

What else do you expect from the Herald Sun?

 

[Kong]

I'd still support this paper if it meant running Fairfax/The Age out of business.

Robbo and co. may be dead beats, but at least they're not just a mouthpiece for the AFL.

 

[Beerfish]

You've all ignored the biggest piece of WTF in the article.

At 20 years old, as a key position forward, Joe Daniher's career is at a CROSSROADS.

That really is a mighty big mug of wtf right there.
Did someone put their name to that?