Mega Thread Port Forum 'General AFL Talk' Thread Part 6

[Smithy7]

Poor Nigel, he can push the piece of string into a USB port but no one can hear him talking into the can.

That post made my day Ford ... that's Nigel to a tee

 

[Enviable Tradition]

It's that time of the year when the players the Crows fans dream of getting back for the player they know is leaving start to sign on for their own clubs instead.

Petracca re-signs with the Dees.

Sent from my SM-G930F using Tapatalk

 

[Doctor Feel]

Jy Simpkin lol

 

[Doctor Feel]

Gee. Naitanui to miss JLT and possibly R1 with bone on bone issues in his knee. Media saying possibly will limit his career.

I had no idea he's 27 years old. Feels like he only just burst onto the scene.

 

[edgie]

It's not only possible, but likely this will be very unfortunate for him. Big issue, especially since his recovery was apparently going so well last year.

Sent from mTalk

 

[Power Girl]

The Crows are mastering the rare double act of losing a player and self-destructing in the process.

If Sloane does leave, I'm more interested in the self immolation than Sloane actually leaving.

They seem damned anyway. If he stays it doesn’t get rid of the desperation and panic about keeping players that has deeply set in and if he goes it would seem like they would have to re-sign a whole heap of interstate super talent for them to shrug that fear.

 

[Doctor Feel]

I'm hoping he doesn't leave because I think if he does, it could be the straw that breaks the camel's back and they actually bother to get their shit together and fix their culture.

On the other hand, probably little to no chances of that happening with Smart, Riccuito and Chapman at the helm.

 

[edgie]

It's against their very being to change how they do things.

Sent from mTalk

 

[spookism]

I'm hoping he doesn't leave because I think if he does, it could be the straw that breaks the camel's back and they actually bother to get their shit together and fix their culture.

On the other hand, probably little to no chances of that happening with Smart, Riccuito and Chapman at the helm.

You mean Bock, Davies, Paddy, Lever leaving couldn't do that?

 

[Lagooner]

You mean Bock, Davies, Paddy, Lever leaving couldn't do that?

You left out the best one, Strikethrough Tippett!

 

[Andre]

I'm hoping he doesn't leave because I think if he does, it could be the straw that breaks the camel's back and they actually bother to get their shit together and fix their culture.

On the other hand, probably little to no chances of that happening with Smart, Riccuito and Chapman at the helm.

I’m hoping he stays, but on an over the top contract, that keeps them out of the race for good uncontracted players and free agents. They’ll get to boast they’ve fixed the issues, without actually doing so and costing long term for the short term stay of execution.

 

[Waspy79]

Hawthorn look well high just inside the top half at 9.

Melbourne look low.

The rest seem about right.

Agree apart from Bulldogs? Bont and

Their midfield is deep but not exactly star laden.

 

[Waspy79]

Gee. Naitanui to miss JLT and possibly R1 with bone on bone issues in his knee. Media saying possibly will limit his career.

I had no idea he's 27 years old. Feels like he only just burst onto the scene.

Being a fan of his work and the art of ruckman in general this saddens me.

 

[TheFVK]

Rory O'Sloaney trending on Twitter atm. Our Kane doing a bit of shitstirring...

https://twitter.com/search?q="Rory Sloane"&src=tren

The fallout from Sloane leaving and resultant implosion will be elite. Since they left, these former superstars immediately transformed:

• Phil Davis is now Phil Davi$
• Gunston is now a mummy's boy
• Dangerfield is FIGJAM and made the Crows midfield worse somehow (possibly due to the acquisition of emerging superstar Dean Gore)
• Nathan Bock is a drug addict
• Kurt Tippet is now the worst bloke of all time
  
• Jake Lever is possibly the worst of them all for some reason, and made baby Jesus cry. Something about his face.
• In addition and as a generality, if any have partners they are succubus who also forced them to leave. Also these guys all literally couldn't say no because of money.

My guess is, following his announcement to move the Rory Sloane god worship will break down over the course of a few days along three key themes

1. THE PLAYER: Rory is weak and can't handle a tag anyway
2. THE CHARACTER: Dangerfield got in his ear, he's impressionable, not a leader, no wonder Tex The Big Texan Texas Walker was made captain etc.
3. THE PARTNER: Belinda has him by the balls and she's put her career over him winning a premiership, selfish.

Nigel will fight against every screaming urge in his body and send him a B&F invite, only for Tex to go round his house and hide his car keys the night before. Sloane leaves in acrimony, Fagan makes a passive aggressive tweet, a brief nationwide light is again shone on the cultureless corp which is swept under the rug locally, Crows pick up a late first round pick (later described as "brave" in Size 72 font on page 1 of the Powertiser), David Mackay retires and is automatically appointed a development coach, a swamp tier SANFL side get their 15 mins of fame by blaming it on Port, the latest CEY equivalent will be ordained the second coming, and the wheel goes round again.

 

[edgie]

I get the Tex nickname, I do.

But how on earth did it become the big Texan? He's not even from Texas ffs. Could you imagine explaining it?

Ah, so he's from Texas?
No.
Family from Texas?
No.
Missus?
Nein.
Twitter followers?
Nope, they're from Turkey.

So it started as Tex, for sharing a surname with a fictional character, and is now unironically referred to a Texan?

Yea

Sent from mTalk

 

[GoPorts]

I heard Rory Sloan's dad was nodding his head at West Lakes mall recently.
Definately staying

 

[Tibbs]

You mean Bock, Davies, Paddy, Lever leaving couldn't do that?

You left out the best one, Strikethrough Tippett!

Gunston says hello!

 

[TeeKray]

Being a fan of his work and the art of ruckman in general this saddens me.

I think Champion Data's player rankings are based on a two year formula, which would obviously elevate the Bulldogs players significantly?

A lot of decent B graders with A grade potential - Dahlhaus, Liberatore, Hunter, Macrae. Hunter in particular I thought was going to be an out and out star after 2016 but really disappointed last year.

 

[tribey]

I get the Tex nickname, I do.

But how on earth did it become the big Texan? He's not even from Texas ffs. Could you imagine explaining it?

Ah, so he's from Texas?
No.
Family from Texas?
No.
Missus?
Nein.
Twitter followers?
Nope, they're from Turkey.

So it started as Tex, for sharing a surname with a fictional character, and is now unironically referred to a Texan?

The thickened plot is that there is an actual Big Texan™ - 6'11"/243-pound Dallas native Mason Cox - elsewhere in the league.

 

[Buget]

Crow-vertiser back in force. Not one article on the Power in the paper today, whilst there are 6 crows articles, including the back page.

Not saying it has to be “even” but surely something of interest has happened at Port.

 

[StartTheCarr]

I get the Tex nickname, I do.

But how on earth did it become the big Texan? He's not even from Texas ffs. Could you imagine explaining it?

Ah, so he's from Texas?
No.
Family from Texas?
No.
Missus?
Nein.
Twitter followers?
Nope, they're from Turkey.

So it started as Tex, for sharing a surname with a fictional character, and is now unironically referred to a Texan?

Yea

Sent from mTalk

You do know that is how nicknames work though right? Usually drawing a long bow.

 

[Duck Farmer]

The fallout from Sloane leaving and resultant implosion will be elite. Since they left, these former superstars immediately transformed:

• Phil Davis is now Phil Davi$
• Gunston is now a mummy's boy
• Dangerfield is FIGJAM and made the Crows midfield worse somehow (possibly due to the acquisition of emerging superstar Dean Gore)
• Nathan Bock is a drug addict
• Kurt Tippet is now the worst bloke of all time
  
• Jake Lever is possibly the worst of them all for some reason, and made baby Jesus cry. Something about his face.
• In addition and as a generality, if any have partners they are succubus who also forced them to leave. Also these guys all literally couldn't say no because of money.

My guess is, following his announcement to move the Rory Sloane god worship will break down over the course of a few days along three key themes

1. THE PLAYER: Rory is weak and can't handle a tag anyway
2. THE CHARACTER: Dangerfield got in his ear, he's impressionable, not a leader, no wonder Tex The Big Texan Texas Walker was made captain etc.
3. THE PARTNER: Belinda has him by the balls and she's put her career over him winning a premiership, selfish.

Nigel will fight against every screaming urge in his body and send him a B&F invite, only for Tex to go round his house and hide his car keys the night before. Sloane leaves in acrimony, Fagan makes a passive aggressive tweet, a brief nationwide light is again shone on the cultureless corp which is swept under the rug locally, Crows pick up a late first round pick (later described as "brave" in Size 72 font on page 1 of the Powertiser), David Mackay retires and is automatically appointed a development coach, a swamp tier SANFL side get their 15 mins of fame by blaming it on Port, the latest CEY equivalent will be ordained the second coming, and the wheel goes round again.

It's like you can see the future.

 

[Contested Marx]

You do know that is how nicknames work though right? Usually drawing a long bow.

His nickname should be Cordell if we are being true to the tv show

 

[Andre]

The fallout from Sloane leaving and resultant implosion will be elite. Since they left, these former superstars immediately transformed:

• Phil Davis is now Phil Davi$
• Gunston is now a mummy's boy
• Dangerfield is FIGJAM and made the Crows midfield worse somehow (possibly due to the acquisition of emerging superstar Dean Gore)
• Nathan Bock is a drug addict
• Kurt Tippet is now the worst bloke of all time
  
• Jake Lever is possibly the worst of them all for some reason, and made baby Jesus cry. Something about his face.
• In addition and as a generality, if any have partners they are succubus who also forced them to leave. Also these guys all literally couldn't say no because of money.

My guess is, following his announcement to move the Rory Sloane god worship will break down over the course of a few days along three key themes

1. THE PLAYER: Rory is weak and can't handle a tag anyway
2. THE CHARACTER: Dangerfield got in his ear, he's impressionable, not a leader, no wonder Tex The Big Texan Texas Walker was made captain etc.
3. THE PARTNER: Belinda has him by the balls and she's put her career over him winning a premiership, selfish.

Nigel will fight against every screaming urge in his body and send him a B&F invite, only for Tex to go round his house and hide his car keys the night before. Sloane leaves in acrimony, Fagan makes a passive aggressive tweet, a brief nationwide light is again shone on the cultureless corp which is swept under the rug locally, Crows pick up a late first round pick (later described as "brave" in Size 72 font on page 1 of the Powertiser), David Mackay retires and is automatically appointed a development coach, a swamp tier SANFL side get their 15 mins of fame by blaming it on Port, the latest CEY equivalent will be ordained the second coming, and the wheel goes round again.

 

[Byrons Firen]

Crow-vertiser back in force. Not one article on the Power in the paper today, whilst there are 6 crows articles, including the back page.

Not saying it has to be “even” but surely something of interest has happened at Port.

We are treated in the same way the Labor party is by the Murdoch press. I used to get upset by it, now I wear it like a badge of honour.
We threaten their ownership of SA hence their desperation to ignore/belittle/scoff us with bias and hostility
should be seen as a sign that we're in their heads.
The level of hate and anger on their board reflects the paranoia

paranoia meaning.