Regrettable Things You've Said.

[Kapow!!!]

Was at a party not too long ago we ended up sharing dad jokes. It got to the point where we all shared the "gay horse" joke (What does a gay horse eat? *Limp Wrist* Haaaaaaaaay. It's really all in the delivery hence even when its retold a few times it can still be funny if done with the right balance of hyperbole and restraint....plus we were really hammered). Now all of us there had heard it and told it a million times already so it was really just a weird bunch of drunken idiots rehashing the same delivery of the same joke. It was at this point that the bloke who first told us this joke (Happens to be gay) comes over and asks what the f*** are we doing. We promptly ask him to do his rendition of the joke. It just happens to be the funniest thing our drunk minds have seen and naturally I attempt to compliment him whilst still trying to be funny. So what do I say? "That's excellent. I guess There's no beating legitimacy" .

His boyfriend promptly expelled his drink from his nose and pissed himself laughing whilst I spent the next half an hour trying to apologize. Even though he just laughed at it I still feel like a shit bloke.

 

[Quivorir]

Well shit, I feel like Hitler compared to these "Oops I said gay in front of a gay man"

 

[Gough]

I've said this in another thread, but I once told former Glenelg footy player Nick Chigwidden's parents that I hated him. It made things a touch uncomfortable.

 

[radiojake]

I remember being a little tacker at a supermarket checkout and I could only just see the checkout chicks head - So naturally I asked her "why are you so short?"

Mum went red with embarrassment and very quickly told me off - The woman was in a wheelchair..

 

[Silent Alarm]

Boy oh boy, these stories are par for the course. I get pretty intensely embarrassed about really minor things (if I'm pissed and just text someone anything innocuous, say about their footy side, I'll feel bad about it all the next day). But then I tend to just cringe at the awful shit I've said, probably most of it coming in high school and telling people how I truly felt when they tried to hang shit on me. Don't regret it, just cringe at the delivery....

You should've come to our school. Jesus christ, heinous shit about dead dads, mum's with facial deformities, rumour spreading about this fella who got rogered against a car hood and had the Holden badge pressed into his stomach, your race, how much money you had.. nothing was sacred. Evil turds and most people still don't regret it.

 

[RedmanWasHere]

I remember being a little tacker at a supermarket checkout and I could only just see the checkout chicks head - So naturally I asked her "why are you so short?"

Mum went red with embarrassment and very quickly told me off - The woman was in a wheelchair..

This is the standard for the thread so far.

 

[Miguel Sanchez]

I've said this in another thread, but I once told former Glenelg footy player Nick Chigwidden's parents that I hated him. It made things a touch uncomfortable.

Did you backtrack and say you were talking about a completely different Nick Chigwidden?

 

[La Dispute]

We all say things that haunt us years after they've happened.

Mine is this.

When I was in grade 6, I innocently asked a preppie who had hearing aids "were you born deaf?"

One of my mates couldn't believe what I said.

I guess the upside is, they might not have heard you.

 

[Gough]

Did you backtrack and say you were talking about a completely different Nick Chigwidden?

I was already in too deep, I abandoned ship.

 

[brahj]

Boy oh boy, these stories are par for the course. I get pretty intensely embarrassed about really minor things (if I'm pissed and just text someone anything innocuous, say about their footy side, I'll feel bad about it all the next day). But then I tend to just cringe at the awful shit I've said, probably most of it coming in high school and telling people how I truly felt when they tried to hang shit on me. Don't regret it, just cringe at the delivery....

You should've come to our school. Jesus christ, heinous shit about dead dads, mum's with facial deformities, rumour spreading about this fella who got rogered against a car hood and had the Holden badge pressed into his stomach, your race, how much money you had.. nothing was sacred. Evil turds and most people still don't regret it.

The worst thing I've ever heard at school was from a dude in the same year level as me... Please note: NOT ME.

To set the scene, a female teacher had just returned from Maternity Leave. Unfortunately, there were complications during the pregnancy and the child passed away during the birth. On her first day back teaching, this kid thought it'd be hilarious if he answered a question in class and called the Teacher "Miss Carriage"...

...It wasn't hilarious.

 

[moses]

The worst thing I've ever heard at school was from a dude in the same year level as me... Please note: NOT ME.

To set the scene, a female teacher had just returned from Maternity Leave. Unfortunately, there were complications during the pregnancy and the child passed away during the birth. On her first day back teaching, this kid thought it'd be hilarious if he answered a question in class and called the Teacher "Miss Carriage"...

...It wasn't hilarious.

Did they get into much strife?

 

[brahj]

Did they get into much strife?

**** yeah. Nearly got expelled.

 

[GPW1]

The worst thing I've ever heard at school was from a dude in the same year level as me... Please note: NOT ME.

To set the scene, a female teacher had just returned from Maternity Leave. Unfortunately, there were complications during the pregnancy and the child passed away during the birth. On her first day back teaching, this kid thought it'd be hilarious if he answered a question in class and called the Teacher "Miss Carriage"...

...It wasn't hilarious.

that is absolutely horrible



.... but whats worse is that I cant stop laughing about it.

 

[brahj]

that is absolutely horrible



.... but whats worse is that I cant stop laughing about it.

...atleast Quivorir can stop feeling like Hitler now.

 

[Quivorir]

Not sure if I can, I found that hilarious

 

[Illinois Nazi]

I once spent quite a some time explaining what a complete spud Spider Burton is to someone who turned out to be his best mate from school.

And not something I said but rather something I did at school was the old pull the chair away from someone who is about to sit down trick. Hurt them quite badly.

 

[Sebastian Balboa]

When I was 13, I was mightily pissed off with two slightly older family members because basically they were ****ing bullies to me (male, female), so I told a friend of mine that they have different dads to the rest of their siblings, which is true. It got back to our family what I had said, and when I basically owned up to it at a family get-together you could cut the stone-cold atmosphere in half. It's not so much an issue 30+ years later but I suspect it is always there at the back of their minds at reunions, Christmases and such. I shouldn't have said it.

 

[Brad Goodman]

Well shit, I feel like Hitler compared to these "Oops I said gay in front of a gay man"

You pretty much are.

 

[LicoriceAllsorts]

Once in Year 12 English, we were given an assignment, it was an oral presentation, one of my mates asks our female teacher, "How would you like the oral performed", ended up being suspended or something, but to this day maintains that he did it by accident and didn't mean anything by it...

 

[Dont be a lemon]

That's piss weak to get a suspension.

 

[Dont be a lemon]

When I was 13, I was mightily pissed off with two slightly older family members because basically they were ******* bullies to me (male, female), so I told a friend of mine that they have different dads to the rest of their siblings, which is true. It got back to our family what I had said, and when I basically owned up to it at a family get-together you could cut the stone-cold atmosphere in half. It's not so much an issue 30+ years later but I suspect it is always there at the back of their minds at reunions, Christmases and such. I shouldn't have said it.

Your were 13 and told the truth. If your relatives have an issue with it they can get bent.

 

[LicoriceAllsorts]

That's piss weak to get a suspension.

I know, I think he only got one day or something, I think it may have been because this guy was a bit of a nuisance to the teachers and was always in trouble, etc. He still says he didn't mean it in that matter though

 

[Sebastian Balboa]

Your were 13 and told the truth. If your relatives have an issue with it they can get bent.

Plus me and my younger sister were treated like shit by these two from a young age, but still....

 

[Gough]

I caught the bus to high school with a lad who was a year older then me and we were talking about teachers and he said Mr. So and So hates the word yahtzee, and being the young smart arse I was I lodged this in my memory banks for future reference. Some weeks later this guy is in charge of one of my classes and as the bell went I yelled "yahtzee". He stopped, froze, pointed at me and said "You wait". Everyone leaves the room and I'm left alone there with this guy whose eyes are bulging. "What did you say that for?" he asks me. I splutter some excuse, and he just exploded, grabbed me by the front of my shirt (I was 14) and said, "bullshit, you've been talking to so and so, and if you ever say that in my earshot again I'll kick the shit out of you". To this day I don't know why he hated that word.

 

[Bunk Moreland]

The worst thing I've ever heard at school was from a dude in the same year level as me... Please note: NOT ME.

To set the scene, a female teacher had just returned from Maternity Leave. Unfortunately, there were complications during the pregnancy and the child passed away during the birth. On her first day back teaching, this kid thought it'd be hilarious if he answered a question in class and called the Teacher "Miss Carriage"...

...It wasn't hilarious.

That is disgusting.

However, I defy anybody to read it and not wet themselves.