Entertainment & Music The Simpsons Part 3

[Bosun]

John S.: She never cooks, she doesn't keep a clean house, she


John S.: smokes and she drinks and she talks profanely! She's the queen of the harpies!

Gloria S.: No, I'm not.

John S.: [shouts] Queen of the harpies!

Gloria S.: No, I'm not!

John S.: [shouts] Here's your crown, Your Majesty. Queen of the harpies!

Gloria S.: Get away from me, you swine!

 

[davo99]

People who look like things!

 

[Kram]

I insist you take special care with my collection of valuable and humorous bumper stickers, particularly this one, which was given to me by a Harrison Ford lookalike.

 

[Super Hans]

Yes for a minimal franchise fee, you'll receive a pair of straightening gloves, a canister of wall lubricant and a booklet of the most commonly asked questions you will hear, including: "Who are you?" and "What are you doing here?"

 

[Super Hans]

'Gimme, er, 30 thousand tickets'

'That'll be $950,000 dollars please'

'I don't have any money, can I just pay you later?'

'Sure'

 

[Big Sauce 21]

 

[Kram]

Noooooooooooo!

 

[Kram]

“Yo, Mr. Black, another Brandy.”
“Gentlemen, to evil.”

 

[HugeJohnson]

This episode was on TV last night, lost my shit at this.

 

[04 Durif]

Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins

Homer Simpson smiling politely

 

[Forward Press]

"You have thirty minutes to move your car."
"You have ten minutes to move your car."
"Your car has been impounded."
"Your car has been crushed into a cube."
"You have thirty minutes to move your cube."

[Phone Rings] Hello?

 

[Kram]

“You’re forgetting I’ve got my Power Sauce bars.”
“Wake up, Homer! Those bars are just junk! They’re made of apple cores and Chinese newspapers.”
“Hey, Deng Xiaoping died.”

 

[Cruyff14]

 

[Kram]

Alcohol increases your ability to drive... false? Oh, man.

 

[Kram]

 

[Big Sauce 21]

 

[Super Hans]

 

[Demonalke]

Homer: See ya, kids! Me and my Valu-Qual coupon book are gonna paint the town red, with savings! I'll start with a couple of pizzas, then a complimentary tango lesson, and I'll cap it off with a smooth, refreshing colonic.
Lisa: Um, Dad?
Homer: [singing] Do you like pina colonics, and getting caught in the rain ... [slams door behind him] passing out in the ocean ...

 

[Demonalke]

 

[Super Hans]

How many of these is he going to send?

 

[raven echo]

[Marge is filming Homer sitting in the dugout at a softball game. Homer starts to scratch his crotch
Marge Simpson: Oh, dear.
[points the camera at her feet]
Marge Simpson: Children, tell me when your father stops scratching himself.
[long pause]
Marge Simpson: Kids...?
Bart Simpson: We'll tell you, Mom.

 

[the bee sharps]

Sir, I think your wife would like to hold the baby."
"My wife?! Where?! Where?!"

 

[timtamWB]

[Marge is filming Homer sitting in the dugout at a softball game. Homer starts to scratch his crotch
Marge Simpson: Oh, dear.
[points the camera at her feet]
Marge Simpson: Children, tell me when your father stops scratching himself.
[long pause]
Marge Simpson: Kids...?
Bart Simpson: We'll tell you, Mom.

Wacky Tiger

 

[Kram]

Ah, did you see that jerk? Dropped his notes!

 

[Confuscius]

I don't care how many times this has been posted in this thread before, it's just too many kinds of perfect to not post again.