Travel Travelling solo versus with friends

[PP34]

I’m probably going to get a trip or two before I head into full time work post uni.

I’ve been overseas once before with a mate from school on one of those organised basketball tours which was quite fun.

I finish uni mid this year and know of a few blokes bound for Europe. I’m mates with them but not close so if I went it I’d meet them for a bit but would probably be travelling a fair bit solo. My good mates are all still at uni, stuck working or don’t want to go right now.

My other option is probably to wait till early next year and head to the States with a few of my mates. Problem with this is that I’d have to wait a fair while and that might be problematic as I’ll probably have to be job hunting later this year. Waiting around after finishing your degree isn’t exactly a good look for employers is it?

So that’s my situation, but I thought it also makes for a interesting discussion. How have GDers found travelling solo versus being with some friends?

To me both would have their pros and cons. I’d enjoy the freedom of being on my own, but then again it would suck partying on my own, witnessing things solo and not having mates to talk to. If I was with my mates I know I’d probably want a break from them at some point in the trip.

 

[Gough]

If they're not great mates go with them, they might be great fun, if not burn them if they turn out to be duds, no great friendship lost and head out on your own. You don't strike me as someone who'd be intimidated by that.

 

[perthblue]

I think everyone should try solo travel, and stay at a backpackers. Makes it more exciting and scary when you don't have any anchors from home to keep you warm and safe.

 

[Gough]

I think everyone should try solo travel, and stay at a backpackers. Makes it more exciting and scary when you don't have any anchors from home to keep you warm and safe.

You can always score weed at a backpackers too, or at the very least pointed in the right direction to acquire some.

 

[Silent Alarm]

Don't wait or rely on other people for any sort of plan. Things come up. Travelling alone is pretty easy these days as is travel in general, and unless you're socially inept you'll still have a few nights out and make friends there. Then again if you're pretty socially decent quite often you just struggle anyway due to a million reasons.

I've travelled in Europe with a really good school mate for a month, have spent probably three or so months totally solo, five or so weeks with a girlfriend, and a week with a mate I met over there.

I reckon the best scenario would be to physically head there with a mate; shared sense of excitement, get your footing. If you go for three months I would aim to split maybe five weeks or so in.

The benefits of doing what you want v not, stuff like that are obvious. Sometimes it's good to have no idea what to do in a day because you're overwhelmed or in a boring place so suggestions can help you. Having someone to always drink with is good but it's disappointing when they aren't feeling it. If they're a renowned tight arse I would seriously seriously avoid it – me and my mate did it well, generally he'd vouch for one hostel, I'd do the next, and if one was more expensive then whatever because it would end up working out. But always remember even married couples end up having fights overseas. Travelling is awesome but it's also extremely stressful and mentally and physically exhausting. Something always comes up, plans go awry, money goes missing... fully expect to end up hating your friend but if they're that close then you'll realise decent friendships can go through a long period of barely talking and it's nothing personal and one day you'll be hanging out heaps again.

 

[Taylor]

I think you should take your coolest, most attractive lady friend with you.

She will help get you in, get you out and help you meet new people.

 

[perthblue]

You can always score weed at a backpackers too, or at the very least pointed in the right direction to acquire some.

Its just fun because everyone is in holiday mode and friendly and up for it. very hard to feel lonely.

 

[Silent Alarm]

Solo travelling can be way more emotional but in retrospect you take more risks and end up with funnier stories or crazier nights. I went to nightclubs alone once, massive concerts, and I made friends but then sometimes you feel pretty lame asking for someone else to grab a photo for you and also there's just the profound sense of loneliness... seeing other people down a pub with their mates when you're resigned to having a pint with a book... in a way there's a romance to it and a sense of adventure but it also made me really really really long for home which in a way was a nice feeling in itself.

I feel like I've really ticked off the places I always wanted to go and felt I had to, so from now on I reckon I won't really travel unless I have mates all going somewhere. It gives you some guidance and whether it's just somewhere in Asia which I've basically never been to (Bali doesn't count) or returning to Europe or America (I could be talked into the latter despite finding it basically shit) I just think it'd result in a lot more fun. But I have basically travelled alone for the most part and don't really feel the need to go somewhere I've been before alone, because half the point of solo travel is that sense of finding something new.

 

[raskolnikov]

I have traveled solo many times, including Russia and Romania last year. I find it better as you can do what you want. It's also better for meeting other people, both locals and other travelers, as when you're in a group you tend to just hang out with that group.

 

[Silent Alarm]

Its just fun because everyone is in holiday mode and friendly and up for it. very hard to feel lonely.

You reckon?

A lot of people I know who travelled a fair amount always seem to agree hostels are incredibly hit and miss and not just because some are total filthy shitholes. Even aside from a bad room, sometimes there is just no buzz. I've had awful, boring hostels in New York City which were full of old Texans and people who'd sit around all day watching DVDs while literally struggled to find anyone in common rooms or the attached pub at one in London. Then I've been the bloke spinning yarns in smaller cities or making friends really easily. It's totally hit and miss and usually down to luck. Sometimes the people there are just flogs, or don't want to go out, or are impossible to talk to. This notion they're all one-stop locales for piss drinking and calamity is untrue.

 

[raskolnikov]

Youth hostels were fine when I was younger but wouldn't want to do them now. Which is why they are called youth hostels I guess.

 

[Reynolds Number]

Its just fun because everyone is in holiday mode and friendly and up for it. very hard to feel lonely.

Last time I stayed at a backpackers joint overseas was in KL. Full of cliquey and uptight English backpackers who looked down on me because I was only visiting KL as opposed to living and working there like they were.

Backpackers solo is really hit and miss.

 

[perthblue]

You reckon?

A lot of people I know who travelled a fair amount always seem to agree hostels are incredibly hit and miss and not just because some are total filthy shitholes. Even aside from a bad room, sometimes there is just no buzz. I've had awful, boring hostels in New York City which were full of old Texans and people who'd sit around all day watching DVDs while literally struggled to find anyone in common rooms or the attached pub at one in London. Then I've been the bloke spinning yarns in smaller cities or making friends really easily. It's totally hit and miss and usually down to luck. Sometimes the people there are just flogs, or don't want to go out, or are impossible to talk to. This notion they're all one-stop locales for piss drinking and calamity is untrue.

I'm by no means a seasoned traveller but my experience in backpackers has been very good. Had more fun with my AirBnb in munich though, host was a great guy and very generous with his expensive booze.

 

[Silent Alarm]

I'm by no means a seasoned traveller but my experience in backpackers has been very good. Had more fun with my AirBnb in munich though, host was a great guy and very generous with his expensive booze.

Some Airbnb's are alright and quite cool places and generally a good cost outcome, but some are really really seedy. As in it just feels off. Lots of places are in cahoots and have some racket going. I stayed in one that just had a really weird vibe, we told the guy we'd get in at lunch time and we got in a bit earlier and let him know. Makes up some story and says a friend will give us the keys at the front. This friend was an Asian student and she was about 19 and spoke almost no English while the 'host' was a late 30s Lebanese or Turkish bloke and there was another housemate who spoke no English and was home for about 15 minutes the two or so days we were there. The door locked from the outside or something and I'm pretty sure the key needed about 15 attempts to finally work... all the reviews mentioned equally not that bad but odd things.

Have heard of ones like hosts telling people they have a guest, and people being robbed on their last day there as they exit. Or extortion saying you can have your bags back for $50. I don't really trust it or like it that much.

 

[Gigantic]

I've mostly travelled alone overseas. It's great fun, really brings you out of your comfort zone and puts you in a different mindset than what you'd have if you were hanging around mates. You're more aware of your surroundings, you are more willing to immerse yourself into the culture and environment and you'll be more observant and notice things that you usually wouldn't if you had company with you. I've met people overseas while travelling alone that I still keep in contact with, and a few that I actually run into quite often. I think find a happy medium, where you travel to some cities alone but then try meet up with your mates in places like Prague, Amsterdam, where you'd probably require a bit of company for partying etc.

I'm comfortable on my own and like to travel at my own pace so I really enjoy solo travel. But I understand it's not for everyone, I've had some moments where I was just flat out lonely and needed company beyond strangers that I've only just met in the hostel communal room.

 

[Sketi]

I'm planning on doing both towards the end of the year. Bit of solo first, and then meet up with some people when they arrive after me. Best of both worlds.

Travelling solo can be a lonely place but I like to think it builds character.

 

[Scotland]

I thought I would be the old guy at youth hostels when I was mid 20s and I was very wrong. Most people traveling in their 20s and even a good chunk in their 30s stay in hostels. Depends what sort of travel experience you are looking for I guess. Some people want to meet people and party, others just want a cheap bed. Most people seem to seek out like minded folk. Haven't done a lot of AirBnB-ing but stayed in a place in Munich which was nice enough.

Agree with doing a mix of travel if you can. I wouldn't have been to half the places I've been to if I was waiting around for friends to be willing and able. Sometimes you just have to make your own way and see what happens. I've done a few trips with friends, a few tours, and solo travel making my own way. Enjoyed/didn't enjoy each for different reasons.

Friends: You have familiarity and someone to talk to. You don't have to worry about mundane shit like leaving your bag to go to have a piss at the airport. And you can book multi-person stuff (cars, accom etc) and split the cost. But you can get sick of living in each other's pocket and need to compromise.

Tours: You forced to meet other people, the logistics are sorted for you and you can often cover a lot of territory in a short time which would be impractical to do solo. But they can be expensive relative to solo travel, you are on a fixed itinerary and if you get stuck with a group of dicks bad luck.

Solo: Can get lonely and you need to share rooms with strangers or pay for double/twin share rooms if you really want privacy, and you have to do everything for yourself. But you are the master of your own destiny and don't need to stick to any plan so it's as free as you'll get traveling. I left home with about 4 or 5 weeks planned over an 8 week block. Last minute decided to travel with a mate for a week who happened to be in Europe, then while there decided to go to a bunch of places and ended up filling 4-5 months no worries.

 

[Stratton_Gun]

Depends on the person. I would probably get sick of someone spending time with them 16h a day

 

[tangolikelama]

Travel solo and meet up with people in different places if it works out that way. Personally I hate waiting on others so I prefer to do my own thing. In saying that nothing beats a night out with mates in a foreign country.

 

[PP34]

Solo travelling can be way more emotional but in retrospect you take more risks and end up with funnier stories or crazier nights. I went to nightclubs alone once, massive concerts, and I made friends but then sometimes you feel pretty lame asking for someone else to grab a photo for you and also there's just the profound sense of loneliness... seeing other people down a pub with their mates when you're resigned to having a pint with a book... in a way there's a romance to it and a sense of adventure but it also made me really really really long for home which in a way was a nice feeling in itself.

I feel like I've really ticked off the places I always wanted to go and felt I had to, so from now on I reckon I won't really travel unless I have mates all going somewhere. It gives you some guidance and whether it's just somewhere in Asia which I've basically never been to (Bali doesn't count) or returning to Europe or America (I could be talked into the latter despite finding it basically shit) I just think it'd result in a lot more fun. But I have basically travelled alone for the most part and don't really feel the need to go somewhere I've been before alone, because half the point of solo travel is that sense of finding something new.

Yeah see I’m worried about the whole emotional side of things. When I went overseas last time I was fine, but I was with my mate and it wasn’t really for long.

Being solo I’d be worried about all sorts of emotions, particularly when it comes to drinking and pulling up okay the next day. I’m at my worst hungover and alone. I think about all sorts of shit which puts me in a bad mental state.

 

[Soups]

Loved traveling by myself. Go where you want to go, get up when you want to and if you feel like doing F all you don’t feel like you’re bringing anyone’s holiday down. Pick up a lot easier too.

Also found it easier to meet people in groups because usually if you’re in a group it’s harder to go out or travel somewhere else. Usually with my mates someone clashes heads with someone and it can ruin things quickly. I generally get along with most people.

All in all have loved doing both I think it’s good to mix it up a bit. The best times I had were when I was with some mates and went off by myself and met up with them a couple weeks later.

 

[Scotland]

Traveling alone doesn't mean always being alone. I think people get stuck in a bit of a mindset of 'I don't want to do XYZ by myself' so are put off traveling alone, when in reality if you're not a complete social retread you'll just end up doing a bunch of stuff with people you haven't met yet. I shared a room in Berlin with a couple of lads and ended up on the same tour with them for a couple of weeks. Met up with one bloke a month or two later and traveled around France for a bit, met up with another a year or two later in Canada and caught up with the third for a pint in Melbourne by chance Facebook post. Not many people tend to visit Perth but have seen a couple of friends here, as well as in Melbourne, the US and Europe. Have also met a bunch of people I hung out with once and never saw again, and a bunch of people I never wanted to see again not long after meeting them. All part of the experience.

 

[Silent Alarm]

Yeah see I’m worried about the whole emotional side of things. When I went overseas last time I was fine, but I was with my mate and it wasn’t really for long.

Being solo I’d be worried about all sorts of emotions, particularly when it comes to drinking and pulling up okay the next day. I’m at my worst hungover and alone. I think about all sorts of shit which puts me in a bad mental state.

If you're someone who gets the horrors after drinking then yeah you're going to have some low mornings and of course wake up with probably amplified regret, but there is also a romance in being alone in a city and going through the emotions solo travel brings. It can be a nice blend of melancholy to accept your situation and do your own thing. You have to embrace it and realise it is a privilege and take in the sunsets and really appreciate those words on the page... cos that's all you sometimes have.

 

[JG22]

If the main focus is partying its gotta be much better in a group.

 

[Coolangatta]

I think everyone should do some lone travelling from time to time.