What do you guys think?

[Macca19]

{quote deleted}

Your the one that came here to talk about it. You want peoples opinion on your post then say to go and get ****ed cos you dont know the whole story. Your first post is what you wanted an opinion on. Mandy gave her opinion on your first post which was very 'lets blame it on daddy' and then you go and abuse her for not knowing the whole story yet you didnt write out the whole story did you now? Your not gonna get an opinion on the whole story when you only write 5% of that story here.

 

[mantis]

Carly

I thought you had been here long enough to know, that starting a thread like this, would get nasty responses from the usual suspects, the only time they post, is to have a go & feel like heroes.

My thoughts on the subject, is that your Dad has already shown he doesn't give a stuff about you, your sister, or your Mum, so I can't understand why now, you would think he would be any different, he obviously puts himself before anyone else.

Keep your chin up, Kiddo.

 

[Macca19]

Originally posted by carlyp

I know that its his decision and all that but I just cant believe that he wouldnt want to see his own daughter off when he wont see her till February when she'll be going straight back to uni!

Going by your fiesty second post i cant see how you cant believe it. Considering he obviously doesnt give a stuff about you, your sister or your mother, considering hes given you lot death threats and abused you so much....how is it so unbelievable that he'd rather see his girlfriend who he obviously hasnt seen in a while compared to your sister who he obviously doesnt give two nobs about? Going by your posts it seems like his decision was totally expected and nothing out of the ordinary.

 

[Macca19]

Re: Re: Re: What do you guys think?

Originally posted by carlyp

I said in a previous post. I know that ppl divorce and stuff and although its sad its the way life is. But surely the act of divorce and settlement should be as ammicable as possible. Surely the act of divorce and settlement should not be withheld from one partner just because the other partner is greedy and doesnt want to split with half the assets!

Ugly divorces seem to be the norm rather than the exception.

 

[bunsen burner]

Originally posted by mantis
Carly

I thought you had been here long enough to know, that starting a thread like this, would get nasty responses from the usual suspects, the only time they post, is to have a go & feel like heroes.

We just enjoy laughing at idiots, not unlike yourself.

- Person asks for other's opinions (as explicitly stated in the thread title)
- Recieves an opinion that they don't like
- spits the dummy, accuses them of lack of understanding when the full story wasn't posted, and then tells them to **** off

Sorry, we reserve our right to call an idiot....an idiot!

My thoughts on the subject, is that your Dad has already shown he doesn't give a stuff about you, your sister, or your Mum, so I can't understand why now, you would think he would be any different, he obviously puts himself before anyone else.

Keep your chin up, Kiddo.

Still got a chip on your shoulder about men? Yes, of course it was their fault that they left you. Couldn't possibly have been anything to do with you.

 

[bunsen burner]

Re: Re: Re: Re: What do you guys think?

Originally posted by Macca19
Ugly divorces seem to be the norm rather than the exception.

Does the fiesty one really believe that she would be civil if she went through a divorce?

Reality check please.

 

[mantis]

Originally posted by bunsen burner
Still got a chip on your shoulder about men? Yes, of course it was their fault that they left you. Couldn't possibly have been anything to do with you.

You still can't accept the fact, that a woman dumped the men, poor baby, in the real world, some of us women realise we are with losers & dump their sorry arses, my guess is that you have been on the end of a dumping, hence your inability to accept the truth, bet you told all your mates that you dumped her, just to protect your fragile male ego.

 

[M29]

Originally posted by sabre_ac

Is she a decent sort?

Who? The sister, or the mum?

 

[M29]

Originally posted by bunsen burner

Still got a chip on your shoulder about men?

Chip? It's a potato cake.

 

[mantis]

AAAWW look, another bitter little man who has been shunned by women. Don't worry, I am sure there is a woman out there for you somewhere, maybe try Greenland.

 

[M29]

Originally posted by mantis
AAAWW look, another bitter little man who has been shunned by women. Don't worry, I am sure there is a woman out there for you somewhere, maybe try Greenland.

Fine by me.

As long as a) she dosen't charge by the hour, and b) she can cook.

 

[mantis]

Originally posted by M29
Fine by me.

As long as a) she dosen't charge by the hour,

Why, are you running out of money.

 

[EYeBaLL]

Originally posted by mantis
Why, are you running out of money.

sounds like an offer to me...

 

[otaku]

Originally posted by mantis
AAAWW look, another bitter little man who has been shunned by women.

dont you find that this line is getting old and worn mantis?

you really need to get some new material.

seems to me that your reaction to anything involving men speaks more than words

 

[BeCcA]

geez some of you guys are so cruel!! Carly this might be a little different but I can see where you are coming from! My mum pretty much does the same thing! my parents split up when i was three so luckily I dont really remember it happening!!! She has now remarried a total jerk who thinks he is the King of the house! I have had to move out of home because of him... couldnt handle his constant abuse every day! anyways it hurts when a parent puts their new family in front of you! But I try to ignore it because I know its him not her! for example when I was in hospital a few months ago.. when I got out Mum was supposed to come over and see how I was. but He wouldnt let her leave. shes stuck in the middle and as much as it hurts knowing shes putting them in front of me I guess I have to just deal with it. There are times when im not even alowed to go visit my mum because he wont let me in the house... and she just lets him do that, because she doesnt want to cause trouble I guess what im trying to say is perhaps it might be this new woman?? I cant really comment because I dont know either of them or you But maybe she has a hold over him and is making him come to sydney rather than seeing his daughter?? *shrug* but after reading the **** hes doing maybe it is just him! he probably thinks he is doing nothing wrong!!! either way try to cheer up im sure it will eventualy all work out. Just be there for your mum.. it sounds like she really needs you

 

[bunsen burner]

Originally posted by mantis
some of us women realise we are with losers & dump their sorry arses,

Jerry Springer alert.

my guess is that you have been on the end of a dumping, hence your inability to accept the truth, bet you told all your mates that you dumped her, just to protect your fragile male ego.

You guess wrong - not surprising. Yes I have been dumped before, didn't have a problem with it, got over it quickly, and moved on.

I don't have relationship problems. You're the one who's always raving about how all the men in your life have been losers. None of my ex's are losers. I've never had a bad break up and am on speaking terms with all my ex's. None of them have a problem with me.

 

[bunsen burner]

Originally posted by BeCcA
geez some of you guys are so cruel!!

She asked for an opinion, we gave her one. An honest opinion I might add.

She got abusive, we got abusive back.

Where has the fiesty one gotten to? Does she not want any feedback anymore?

 

[bunsen burner]

Hey Mantis - go iron me a shirt.

 

[raskolnikov]

Jerry Springer has a whole episode right here!

 

[bunsen burner]

Hey Carls, I think you've spat the dummy and taken your bat and ball and gone home. What do you think?

 

[lioness]

Carly all I can say is that you AND your sister shouldn't give your Dad the satisfaction of getting so upset about him leaving without saying a proper goodbye to her. You're both old enough to make your own decisions so if it was me I'd just ignore him for now, and then later on if he comes back and wants to work things out with you two, you have the choice whether you want to, or tell him to get ****ed.

If your family's pretty close, a situation like this would certainly hurt but isn't he showing right now what a great dad he is? Best thing to do now is take care of your Mum........and let Dad do whatever the **** he's going to do.

My parents' divorce was actually pretty amicable, they'd been separated for years and it was just a formality, all us kids were grown up by then and could see they were much happier apart. There was no fuss over who owned what, they just took what they wanted (neither had too many assets anyways so I guess that helped ) and now they're pretty good friends. So I can't say I know what you're going through, but as I said at the start, why give him the satisfaction of getting so bitter about it.

 

[M29]

Originally posted by EYeBaLL
sounds like an offer to me...

Even I have standards.

 

[sabre_ac]

Originally posted by M29
Who? The sister, or the mum?

Hrmm
Quite a decions there.
On one hand there is nothing sweeter than a 18 yo chick.
On the other hand with age comes experience...

 

[Asgardian]

Carlyp, you have my sympathy, a child, any child wants, by force of nature, to love both of his/her parents, when a child is treated as an asset in a divorce it is not only hurtful, it is destructive.

All I can wish is that you remain strong enough to handle life, remember, there is no blame here. No blame on you, no blame on your sister, nor any blame on your Mum, and believe it or not, no blame on your Dad.

He became weak, he looked for something outside of his marriage, please don't blame him, feel sorry for him, that he was too weak to be in control of his actions and emotions.

That said, the other stuff he is saying about murder, money, denying services & housing, and all the other mean spirited stuff, is not something for you, your sister, or your Mum to put up with, you don't have to live in fear, not today, not tomorrow, not ever.

Contact the Police, do this as a priority, contact Community Services, speak to your school counsellors, speak to each and every agency that is there to help you and your family.

When a man tries to create a circle of fear, involving his family, he relies on everything remaining a secret.

If you all expose the threats and treatment, he has lost power, and that is what he is probably he is striving for.

Make everyone aware of everything that has happened, make the police visit him, take out "Restraining Orders", legal aid will help you with this.

When you have done all of this, you deprive him of power, you take away his ability to control the situation.

Please communicate, take away the secrets, and you take away the fear.

Best wishes

 

[P_D]

Perhaps you should make sure you know the whole story before you go thinking......Poor little darling, her parents have got a divorce and she is taking it all out on daddy!

All I can say, is that in relation to my first post... LIKEWISE.
You surely are naive if u simply assume that in my situation, we were not founded on an affluent background prior to my father's leaving... but hey, you're the only one who's ever had to go through a financially-strenuous divorce, right???

It's great that you feel so strongly for your Mum... but bottling up negative emotion is never constructive in my opinion, and it just gets to the point where you have to shrug it off... as, at the end of the day, you're 100% powerless to stop it.