Society/Culture Which bank? Australia's leading bank

[RupieDupie]

Surely if a bank can legally / contractually hold a person to an obligation for 30 years whereby the person, perhaps, has to use most of their fortnightly salary to pay back double the amount of a house value for a house that was worth seven times less 17 years ago, should not be given a one trillion dollar fine for enabling a bit of money laundering and funding of terrorism.

Any competent lawyer should be able to rightly argue how even more despicable and rotten they are allowed to act openly and legally to the Australian public. This is nothing compared to their day-to-day business operation.

Any thoughts?
Has the bank actually done anything wrong, either absolutely or relative to their normal business practice?

http://www.news.com.au/finance/busi...s/news-story/1edbe0b7c34148d64279d5a6dfdace18

 

[The Edukator]

thread has gained a lot of traction. well done.

 

[RupieDupie]

thread has gained a lot of traction. well done.

I know, I was thinking of asking the mods to limit the replies, with that much traffic, it must be like a DoS...

 

[M Malice]

Bloody blood sucking parasitic money making machines with zero altruistic characteristics. Shuffling numbers on a keyboard around ripping off the general public.

 

[chelseacarlton]

The banks and drug cartels.
Over to you Hollywood!

 

[RupieDupie]

Bloody blood sucking parasitic money making machines with zero altruistic characteristics. Shuffling numbers on a keyboard around ripping off the general public.

Yep, and once the industry is all automated with AI this is all they will be. AI is usually painted in terminator robots killing people, but in reality we will be slaves providing resources, innovation and work for machines to think up better and better ways to make more money. We are the AI for the banking machines.

The banks and drug cartels.
Over to you Hollywood!

From the makers of Narcos and Underbelly comes a new NetFlix Original series

"CAN <crossed out apostrophe T>"

Drug Dealer, "Hey amigo, you won't mind me wiring my poor mother back in Colombia some pension money?"
Banker, "Sure sure we CAN, how much?"
Drug Dealer, "$20,000"
Banker, "How about we make it just under $10,000 in this transaction" <points to nose>
Drug Dealer, "Si Si, amigo!"

 

[RupieDupie]

Epilogue:

Ombudsman of some sort - "Did you know money laundering and acting as a portal to fund terrorist activities is illegal! You cannot do this"
100 lawyers march into a room and open their briefcases dramatically on the table, and simultaneously start stating words like affidavit and Amicus Curiae and then, "Yes we CAN"

Role the credits

 

[chelseacarlton]

From the makers of Narcos and Underbelly comes a new NetFlix Original series

"CAN <crossed out apostrophe T>"

Drug Dealer, "Hey amigo, you won't mind me wiring my poor mother back in Colombia some pension money?"
Banker, "Sure sure we CAN, how much?"
Drug Dealer, "$20,000"
Banker, "How about we make it just under $10,000 in this transaction" <points to nose>
Drug Dealer, "Si Si, amigo!"

Drug dealer to amigo-"nowa,can we jus repeat dis transaction 10 tine aday everree dai all de time forever,poor mamma"

 

[RupieDupie]

Drug dealer to amigo-"nowa,can we jus repeat dis transaction 10 tine aday everree dai all de time forever,poor mamma"

Then in a burst of Brechtian theatre the banker and drug dealer start singing "Amigos para siempre"

As a bonus the banker then goes off and applies for a government export market development grant and wins $20 Million

 

[chelseacarlton]

Then in a burst of Brechtian theatre the banker and drug dealer start singing "Amigos para siempre"

As a bonus the banker then goes off and applies for a government export market development grant and wins $20 Million

Dat way we all git high an mightee!

 

[RupieDupie]

There was a little drug dealer with loads and loads of money,
All starting out to find a home with Mr Blonde and Mr White
And as that little drug dealer began to chug along
He was heard to sing this song
Choo, choo, choo, choo
Choo, choo, choo, choo
I feel so good today
Oh buy my smack
And some of my crack
I'll go my merry way

The ecstasy went rousing on so fast it seemed to fly
Until the drug dealer reached a legal roadblock that went almost to the sky
The Little drug dealer moaned and groaned and puffed on a Mary Jane
But halfway through the legal mumbo-jumbo he just gave up and seemed to say
I can't go
I can't go
I'm weary as can be
I can't go
I can't go
This job is not for me

But then a Commonwealth intelligent deposit machine appeared,
I think I CAN,
I think I CAN,
I think I have a plan,
And I CAN do most anything
If only I think I CAN...

 

[GreyCrow]

Next time the bank calls me in for a meeting I shall go into the bank wearing a keffiyeh

 

[Sinjin Smith]

Surely if a bank can legally / contractually hold a person to an obligation for 30 years whereby the person, perhaps, has to use most of their fortnightly salary to pay back double the amount of a house value for a house that was worth seven times less 17 years ago, should not be given a one trillion dollar fine for enabling a bit of money laundering and funding of terrorism.

Any competent lawyer should be able to rightly argue how even more despicable and rotten they are allowed to act openly and legally to the Australian public. This is nothing compared to their day-to-day business operation.

Any thoughts?
Has the bank actually done anything wrong, either absolutely or relative to their normal business practice?

http://www.news.com.au/finance/busi...s/news-story/1edbe0b7c34148d64279d5a6dfdace18

No, competent lawyers would never go down that path of defence. It's not logical whatsoever.

 

[M Malice]

No, competent lawyers would never go down that path of defence. It's not logical whatsoever.

I think there may be a dash of cynicism, irony and sarcasm in RDs post and a healthy dose of being pissed off with the system.

 

[RupieDupie]

No, competent lawyers would never go down that path of defence. It's not logical whatsoever.

Yeah but suppose a certain world leader named "Kim" decided he would bully, threaten, intimidate, molest, assault, imprison, torture, mutilate, and murder a number of his citizens and everyone was cool with him, but then one day he was told he had broken the law because he had signed a few documents fraudulently it would be "whoppity doo" wouldn't it?

 

[RupieDupie]

In an organisation this big, mistakes can be made and in this case it was a coding error, and here I am thinking the worst of banks, just like the CEO thinks people think, "I understand there is very little goodwill for banks in general..." I wonder how on Earth, such good people could have such a bad reputation?

http://www.news.com.au/finance/busi...s/news-story/54d70767ec718bc77bb8755c2a3d97f8

In other news

Apparently when TabCorp faced a similar investigation they managed to bargain the fine down 98%, but please note that the following article comes from the Socialists at ABC. I wonder who's utensil* I would have to suck to get 98% off a fine.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2017-08-06/this-week-in-finance/8775908

*read as how much money I would have to have

 

[Rob]

* off it was a coding error. It was a "fixing this will either cost too much or piss too many people off" error.

They could have fixed the problem in an instant by simple imposing a $10k cap on the deposit machines. Anything more you have to come in the branch and report to AUSTRAC. But that means less people will use the CBA to bank with. So they ignored the problem.

 

[RupieDupie]

Apparently there has been a bit more hanky-panky from the banks, a few have gone closed doors with ASIC to give ASIC much munny in an out of court settlement in response to them rate-rigging.

ANZ, NAB, Westpac, yep, the pillars of our society have come up with some more innovative ways to make heaps and heaps of munny, I'm thinking they should all be awarded The Sveriges Riksbank Prize in Economic Sciences in Memory of Alfred Nobel.

 

[ShanDog]

I have a solution. Everyone give me $50k each for start-up capital and I'll start a new bank. Promise I won't try to make too much money.

 

[RupieDupie]

I have a solution. Everyone give me $50k each for start-up capital and I'll start a new bank. Promise I won't try to make too much money.

Why didn't Pablo Escobar ever win the prize in economics, he made heaps of cash for his business in a relatively short period of time?

 

[ShanDog]

Why didn't Pablo Escobar ever win the prize in economics, he made heaps of cash for his business in a relatively short period of time?

Won't lie - I don't really know who he is. Gimme a few months to eventually read up and learn about him when I get time and I'll be back to you with a mildly witty quip

 

[RupieDupie]

Won't lie - I don't really know who he is. Gimme a few months to eventually read up and learn about him when I get time and I'll be back to you with a mildly witty quip

Then you will be responding to my mildly witty quip

 

[Tiffsta]

Which bank can knowingly fund terrorism with no repercussions ? Imagine if joe citizen was caught doing it....
And the grovelling all the banks have been doing lately to try butter up the public against a royal commission
No withdraw fees from other banks ATMs and next day bank transfers all should have been done ages ago

 

[RupieDupie]

Which bank can knowingly fund terrorism with no repercussions ? Imagine if joe citizen was caught doing it....
And the grovelling all the banks have been doing lately to try butter up the public against a royal commission
No withdraw fees from other banks ATMs and next day bank transfers all should have been done ages ago

Yeah, it is like whipping a person for years and then one day stating, "I'm not going to whip you anymore", and the person should be all like, "wow, thanks". They shouldn't have even had the fee introduced years ago - it served no purpose.