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Family & Relationships worst breakups

  • Thread starter Thread starter kwame
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magic_johnson! said:
I don't think i have portrayed it quite well then as there's still some foggyness about the matter.
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Hmmmm, no there isn't. As far as she is concerned, it's over.

You're coming across as a bit desperate and needy. Go out, get a root and move on (or just repeat the process with a different girl).
 
magic_johnson! said:
I don't think i have portrayed it quite well then as there's still some foggyness about the matter.
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Sorry mate agree with the others, it is definitely over. You don't have a relationship with a girl if you dont speak for 6 days.

Dont go and officially end it either. If your thinking she might come round and say "no I dont want to break up" Ill save you the trouble, she wont. Be strong, dont call her or see her, just get out hit the grog, chill with mates and when your ready find another one.

Keep your head up.
 
getthefooty said:
No, he needs to officially end it. Just weird/awkward otherwise. Just has to make sure he doesn't get dragged into a massive chat where you both talk about feelings and all that shit. Just be quick, to the point then don't talk to her again.
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If he foolishly goes and speaks to her, you are responsible.
 

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My ex left me for his best friend's live-in girlfriend. The girl was also a good friend of mine.

Pretty recent, and Im still in a world of pain :(
 
succubus said:
My ex left me for his best friend's live-in girlfriend. The girl was also a good friend of mine.

Pretty recent, and Im still in a world of pain :(
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Get together with his best friend and commiserate. Not saying hook up, but if someone's in the same boat as you it helps to be able to hang out and get each other through it.
 
Caesar said:
Get together with his best friend and commiserate. Not saying hook up, but if someone's in the same boat as you it helps to be able to hang out and get each other through it.
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Im not attracted to him at all so there would be no hooking up lol. I don't really want to see him. Just reminds me of the whole awful situation :(
 
Uh, it's a relationship, not a job. "Officially ending it"? Got news for you, if you ain't talking it's over - there's no need to hand in a letter of resignation specifying a formal end date. If there's any doubt about it start getting with other girls and get your mates to make sure that she hears about it.

Going to her and saying it's over just gives her the chance to say "What? Oh I know it's over silly, I knew that weeks ago. By the way, this is Esteban, we're passionately in love."
 
It's not like that, especially when you're only 17. There would be doubt from both sides as to what is going on. Ending it puts all doubts and worries out of your mind and as Ricketts says it puts you in the position of control. You are not subject to what the girl wants and can't be ****ed around any longer.

And if she says 'yeah no shit, of course it's over you ****wit' (which is obviously the worse case scenario) nothing is really altered, it just confirms she's a bitch and makes it a bit easier to handle.
 
Okay. I just think that if you're not talking to the girl then there's nothing to discuss - it's obviously over. If you're confident enough in your own decisions then there isn't any uncertainty, and I think that pretending there is is just rationalising an excuse to talk to her again.

Going back and talking to her is just going to reopen old wounds, and by initiating contact you're putting yourself in the weak position (even if your intention is just to "officially end it"). Send her a Dear John letter or an email if you have to get all the angst out, but really I think even that's unnecessary and ill-advised. Girls always want to post-mortem relationships - I just want to get out and move on.

JMO. Although more than one ex-girlfriend has called me a heartless bastard.
 

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Tend to agree with that.

She has already ended it in her mind, by breaking up with him until she sorted herself out. She let him down easily, is probably breathing a sigh of relief as to how well he took it, and now he is going to bring it up and cause tension.

I understand where he is coming from. He likes this girl and wants her back. However she holds the power.

In the back of his mind, he doesn't want to do anything to jeopardise a future chance at reconciliation, and let's face it, stranger things have happened.

If he ends it 'officially', then any flicker she could have is gone. If he pines over her, he looks weak, and she need not do anything as she can be single and have him pandering to her.

If he takes her at her word that they are no longer in a relationship, until she says otherwise, then he is free to move on and see others. She will either be relieved because she has no thoughts of getting back with him, or she might be jealous that he moved on without any fuss.

She is probably not going to be back, but no issue with moving on but hedging your bets and leaving the door open in case she comes to her senses. Live like you are broken up and truly believe you are, but don't make any symbolic grandiose gestures about official endings, or you lose even the tiniest chance of her coming back and you holding the power. Some women want what they can't have, or want what others want.
 
i find that when im in a relationship there seems to be endless opportunity to cheat

but once out of said relationship i have to put in effort to get the same girls that were raping me with their eyes while i was in a relationship
 
clivewaterhousen said:
i find that when im in a relationship there seems to be endless opportunity to cheat
but once out of said relationship i have to put in effort to get the same girls that were raping me with their eyes while i was in a relationship
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I am finding that out now.

and same- I'd have to go to extreme lengths to get girls when I was single.

I put it down to now that I am in a relationship I am not thinking of every girl as a possible resting place for my dick, so I tend to talk to them easier and alot more naturally, rather than trying to say the right things to get in.
 
Well, I'm hoping she leaves him for another man and breaks his heart. Then she can die in a fire or something, burnt at the stake would be nice, and he can be maimed but not killed in an unfortunate alien anal probing accident.

As you can tell, I'm still in the angry and bitter stage of being dumped :thumbsu:
 

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succubus said:
Well, I'm hoping he leaves her for another man and breaks his heart. Then he can die in a fire or something, burnt at the stake would be nice, and she can be maimed but not killed in an unfortunate alien anal probing accident.

As you can tell, I'm still in the angry and bitter stage of being dumped :thumbsu:
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Edited for H2F!!!
 
not sure if it's the right place or not, but got friendzoned by a girl I've been in love with for two years earlier ... it hurts so ****ing much. :(
 
One of the worst breakups, which now (nearly 10 years later) has turned out to be the best.

Two of my friends (one male, one female) - I set them up and they hit it off in a MAJOR way, within two months they were living together, got married in six, had a child the following year.

Her former boyfriend came back on the scene (had been in prison I think), and was overheard at the pub talking about all the things he'd done to her the night before. Massive barney ensued, and though we all had doubts about the veracity of the ex's claims, the husband was convinced, and decided to "get his revenge", getting with one of his wives friends.

Things got REALLY nasty with broken tvs, thrown knives, and the police became a regular visitor. Eventually we got around the two of them, sat them down and really let them have it - five or six of us, both lots of (grand)parents, etc.

They decided to seperate.

Both started to drift away from us - it was too hard to organise functions with both, so only one could ever come - eventually it became too much and we stopped contact.

Both found new partners.
Both remarried.

He was a groomsman at her wedding, she the matron of honour at his.

They are now best friends, and share a smallish circle of friends (not ours anymore), he's great mates with his ex-wife's husband, she's good friends with his new wife.

A little (ok a lot) unusual, but one situation where an awful breakup eventually worked out for the best.
 

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