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dwayne ****head russel

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I don't know what all this dribble is about, but Dwayne has some of the best sayings after each goal is scored.
 

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When a player caught holding the ball, or someone traps the ball in under them... and Russell comes out with "He's dead".

That gives the absolute s**hits.

The list of his cliches, phrases, catchcrys that I dispise is well over 100.
 
Bruce, Cometti and Walls are far worse than this guy. Though to be honest he is still bloody terrible.
 

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Walls I'll agree is horrible, for very different reasons, but Bruce and especially Cometti are miles ahead of Dwayne.

I'd put them ahead if they were by themselves, I just can't stand when they commentate together, and since that's every bloody time..... :thumbsd::thumbsd:
 
This thread is outstanding. Although now I can no longer watch a game where Russel is commentating without focusing on every thing he says. He is a nightmare come true.
 
I turned on the Eagles v Port match yesterday, and the first words I heard were by our beloved Dwayne - "Shorts it". I dearly hope that this phrase does not spread further than Dwayne and Quarterbrain. It is no coincidence that these two are my 2 least favourite commentators.
 
I turned on the Eagles v Port match yesterday, and the first words I heard were by our beloved Dwayne - "Shorts it". I dearly hope that this phrase does not spread further than Dwayne and Quarterbrain. It is no coincidence that these two are my 2 least favourite commentators.

I may well be mistaken but I'm quite sure I've heard Michael "Chrisso" Christian say it...

The term needs to be banned. I've recently watched two different games with two different people who both went irate when the term was used.

Agreed on Quarterbrain, annoying to say the least.
 
I've never seen such a united front on a topic before.

The hatred of this w***er's commentary unites people from all teams. :thumbsu:
 

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what does "shorts it" even mean??

yeah he's not a great caller. not the worst imo. i voted time lane on the heralds sun survey.

haven't watched a fox sports game with commentary this year (all watched in the pub) so haven't listened to dwayne much lately.

EDIT: was thinking tim lane was andy maher. maher not even an option. AM is easily the worst person on the box relating to footy. can't even think of tim lane's calls now.... Changed answer to Walls though. he is worse than Russel
 
Was watching the winners - that crazy good show hosted by Dwayne if anyone isn't aware of it. It's as good as it gets.

Saw a bit of his work from WCE V Port, just a short bit. I think Boak kicked a goal in the fourth quarter and Dwayne referred to him as the fire starter in the 3rd, and then I think he realised the fire had then be put out and wasn't sure whether Boak would be the fire started again. And if so whether he was lighting a different fire, or the same one.
 
you could turn his commentary into a drinking game but you'd be paraletic by QTR time

It's party time now for the drunk guy at home
You better believe it!
This drink is CRAZY GOOD!
 
you could turn his commentary into a drinking game but you'd be paraletic by QTR time

It's party time now for the drunk guy at home
You better believe it!
This drink is CRAZY GOOD!
This is actually the only purpose I can see him serving.

"shorts it" is a shot.

"that could be the firestarter!" is a flaming moe.

Rules write themselves.
 
Let's make rules.

Every time DR says "shorts it", drink some of your beer. Obviously if we said "do a shot of liquor", you'd be dead by about 20 minutes into the first quarter.

"Can get and go" - drink some of your beer and run around the nearest table.

Any overly exaggerated adjective for a simple footballing task - take a shot of whatever liquor you have in your possession.

"Only in your wildest dreams!/In your dreams!" - take a shot and recount your dream from the previous night. If you can't remember your dream, take a shot.

"From little things, big things grow!" - everyone participating in your drinking game takes a shot from smallest to tallest. If you're by yourself, 2 shots.

"That could be the firestarter!" - Somehow light your alcohol on fire and drink it.

"You bet he can!/You bet it is!/You bet he does!" - Take a shot, then bet on when Dwayne will say this phrase again. Winner does not have to take a shot the next time Dwayne says the phrase.

Have I missed anything?
 
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