Please help me

[IschenkoUBeauty]

How are things today, mate? I hope releasing like you did last night has helped. That took courage

Woke up about an hour ago in a state. Just goibg to be a relief more than anything I think when I go and see someone today.

 

[GarnerSmash]

Woke up about an hour ago in a state. Just goibg to be a relief more than anything I think when I go and see someone today.

Glad to hear that you are going to see someone IUB. Stick with it mate.

 

[Vekgib]

Woke up about an hour ago in a state. Just goibg to be a relief more than anything I think when I go and see someone today.

Good luck.It's the first step in a long journey, but it's also the hardest step to take.

 

[HBF]

Woke up about an hour ago in a state. Just goibg to be a relief more than anything I think when I go and see someone today.

If you're anything like me you'll spend the first visit or two in tears. But you can and will get through it.

 

[Twoslabs]

Just goibg to be a relief more than anything I think when I go and see someone today.

Quoted for truth The relief you feel when you open up to someone who listens then starts coming back with a plan to help is wonderful.

My psych said the hardest thing is admitting something isn't quite right, once you pass that stage it's the opportunity for things to get better.

Good luck today Mate, if you ever want to talk further feel free to PM me

 

[Morganashlee]

I hope you are feeling better than when you started this thread IUB. It takes an enormous amount of courage to take that first step towards breaking the cycle and you have done that.

There will be ups and downs along the road and times where you might want to give in, if you find yourself at that point come back here and read your OP as well as the support you have. The lows you may face make the highs so much more enjoyable, just keep moving forward.

I wish you all the best and hope you find the happiness you deserve.

 

[Gough]

Pleased you're seeing someone mate, first step, and all that. Hopefully, a weight will start to disappear from your shoulders.

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

My next question is - how long does something like this take to fix? Can it be fixed? I've felt like this for a long time, years.

 

[Better Loosen Up]

It will take time IUB. Don't expect anything overnight. Along the way you will notice small "wins". Gradually you will become better at managing this illness and that is empowering in itself.

Just remember, you're not alone. There's no shame in what you're going through and in most cases these illnesses are something you are born with, they just require a trigger.

You will be surprised how understanding and helpful the people around you will be as well. I know i was.

 

[Better Loosen Up]

In my case (which sounds a little different to yours), my illness is something i will always have. All it needs is a negative trigger for it to flair up again. The difference is i've now learnt how to deal with it so if it does come back again, i will be better prepared without having to go down the path of medication which is something i made clear from the start that i wanted to try and avoid. Since getting help, i have gone from being almost completely unable to function on a daily basis to now functioning just as well as the next person.

 

[Wosh]

My next question is - how long does something like this take to fix? Can it be fixed? I've felt like this for a long time, years.

There are no quick fixes or magic pills, though there are great advances in anti depressants use them only exactly as prescribed..but there are many support networks and people you can turn to for help..be comforted knowing you are not alone or weird and that many many people out there feel like you do.
When you are home alone and need help try calling Beyond Blue..they are extremely helpful and have a good network of experienced people to talk to you and help guide and support you..its worth the phone call.

And stay away from booze and drugs, your mind is under enough pressure as it is already..don't poison it more.

Along with everyone else here I wish you the best of luck in finding ways to feel happier..it really is up to you and you CAN do it with the right help and support which you obviously realise you need and are actively seeking.
Well done xx

 

[HBF]

My next question is - how long does something like this take to fix? Can it be fixed? I've felt like this for a long time, years.

I suffer from anxiety and have done all my life. It wasn't until it got too much for me that i spoke to my GP and realised i've suffered anxiety all my life. Pretty sure i will have it for the rest of my life but have learnt to control and live with it.

 

[CLUBMEDhurst]

My next question is - how long does something like this take to fix? Can it be fixed? I've felt like this for a long time, years.

Glad to hear that you're goin' to see somebody (gutsy move opening a thread, however I hope the support that you've received has been worth it).

Try not to make the mistake of wanting a "cure" too soon. Have often seen folk become "depressed about being depressed", particularly if they're recovery takes longer than they expected.

Cherish the small gains, and accept the inevitable setbacks.

It would be foolhardy to put a timeframe on how long it'll take to fix, however if you take professional advice, there may be strategies that you can employ that may provide some relief.

Good luck IUB

 

[Gough]

One of the toughest things I found in my experience was that right at the time when all I felt like doing was sitting in a darkened room waiting for the rapture, I was forced to work hard, not something I'm fond of at the best of times, to confront, and overcome the issue. It's a proactive process beating this, you can't just sit back, and wait for the drugs to work, I found I had to put in a lot of in effort too, and that was frequently exhausting.

 

[Yidaki]

Hi GD

Posted this in the north board but I want the help of anyone willing to listen.
Please dont make fun of me for this, i know you wont.

I've hit the wall. I have no idea who I am anymore. I'm broken as a person and I'm not sure any amount of time will fix it and return me to the person I used to be. I can take a holiday, i can try to suppress it but it lingers and it eats me up 24 hours a day. Alcohol isn't the answer anymore. I'm afraid now that in my state of mind I could venture down another path...I certainly dont want to be damaging myself further from what I am nor do I want it to affect those I love and care for. How can I define myself? I hate myself and who I am. I never give myself any credit for anything I do but I will say that I know I'm a good person and a good man. I've tears rolling down my face as I write this which is strange because I never cry. I cannot handle it any longer. People deserve to be in a place they feel content, a state of mind they can feel at home and an overall wellbeing that promotes good health. Ive not had any of those and I have nothing.

So sorry for things I might say or do on here. I've lost myself over a number of years and its all crumbling down now.

Please help me


IUB

IUB,

I have a few thoughts that I'd like share with you.

I'm in my late twenties and have been through various rough patches. Over this time, I always believed that I was in control of everything. It was only in the last 4 years that I realised this was not the case. We are in control of practical things, but life itself we are not in control of. We tend to have this assumption that if we use our minds that everything will be OK. Thinking is extremely useful, but mostly it can cause a lot of grief if you let it master you.

I've learnt that mind is secondary and the processing of letting go to life is primary. When you do this, you became the observer of your thinking and not the slave to it. This in turn sets you free of the emotional roller-coaster that would ensue if you believed every thought even the ones on a subconscious level; some thoughts you are not even aware of, but they can have drastic consequences.

Goals in life are perfectly fine and normal. However, the key is to be OK with whatever happens. Like I said, the process of life is unfolding before our eyes. We don't control this, but we can watch it play out. Control means struggle and enslavement to the unhealthy thinking patterns. Every expectation you ever have had needs to be dropped. You need to stop identifying with such things, and also particularly of where you should be or shouldn't be. These are sure fire ways to cause suffering. Being flexible to whatever happens is quick way to reverse suffering. In truth, suffering only exists if we let it. We are the ones that do it to ourselves. The richest of rich may be wealthy, but some of them suffer extreme mental anguish. This could also apply to a poor person if they did identify with their life situation. That's they key: identification with your life situation. A fresh perspective is needed, but more importantly, 100% gratitude for what you do have. However, there needs to be whole-hearted surrender to this without wanting something in return.

These realisations were huge for me in helping me be free of struggles. However, they can only truly occur if you spend time reflecting with yourself. Some of these emotions that are coming out are trying to tell you something. All alcohol does is push them back down. Courage is needed to delve into them, but the rewards are worth it. Freedom from the enslavement of the mind.

Start with the practical things: seeing someone, exercise, healthy foods (massively important), dropping your alcohol intake, gratitude. I can't emphasise enough the importance of exercise and healthy foods. Both of these things can drastically improve your mental state.

One last thing to remember: It does not matter that you are going through something like this. In fact, there is a lot of beauty and self-discovery to come out of it if you just let go. I see life now in a completely different way. The mere fact we are alive experiencing it is a miracle in itself.

All the best.

 

[TheFreshBanana]

My next question is - how long does something like this take to fix? Can it be fixed? I've felt like this for a long time, years.

I've dealt with depression for 4 years now, and if you look back to some posts I made 1-2 years ago, you'll see I was asking the same question.

I was confused and frustrated as to why I was still suffering from depressive episodes, as I like to call them.

Now, I've accepted the fact that it most likely will be with me for the rest of my life, and something I always will need to be wary of. This isn't to say that you'll be the same.

However, over time you'll gain experience and learn a lot about yourself and your depression. Like, I know there are certain triggers that can make me depressed. Or I know that if I'm nervous, then I avoid coffee otherwise I get a panic attack. Or if I drink coffee and feel anxious, I know there's something troubling me deep inside.

I think the medical definition of depression is 2 weeks. But, in my experience, it can vary even up to 1 day where you just feel like absolutely rock bottom shit. I've had times where I feel like shit over something, but after a couple of good night sleeps I start to feel better.

At first, depression will be something you think about almost all the time. Then it'll be something you think about everyday. Then you'll check how your feeling every few days and so on and so on.

 

[TheFreshBanana]

IUB,

I have a few thoughts that I'd like share with you.

I'm in my late twenties and have been through various rough patches. Over this time, I always believed that I was in control of everything. It was only in the last 4 years that I realised this was not the case. We are in control of practical things, but life itself we are not in control of. We tend to have this assumption that if we use our minds that everything will be OK. Thinking is extremely useful, but mostly it can cause a lot of grief if you let it master you.

I've learnt that mind is secondary and the processing of letting go to life is primary. When you do this, you became the observer of your thinking and not the slave to it. This in turn sets you free of the emotional roller-coaster that would ensue if you believed every thought even the ones on a subconscious level; some thoughts you are not even aware of, but they can have drastic consequences.

Just to touch on this, I was surprised to find out that people I've recently met consider quite a relaxed and cafe free person. It is no way how I'd describe myself but in some ways it's true.

Lol, quite embarrassing, but a maybe even as early as a year ago I remember being quite anxious about a lot of things. Things as trivial as what people might be thinking when they see you down the street.

So as a way to combat this I came up with something called "my inner Swanny". Now, I don't know Dane Swan personally, but he is someone I think personifies the attitude of "not giving any ****s". So when I was feeling quite stressed about something, I'd just tell myself to channel my inner Swannie, basically WWSD. What Would Swanny Do?

Lol totally forgot I did this until I read this post, but I honestly think it worked for me.

 

[NorthernLights]

Woke up about an hour ago in a state. Just goibg to be a relief more than anything I think when I go and see someone today.

I know very little about depression IUB, but I'm thinking about you mate. Obviously I can only go by your posting but you seem like a top bloke. I'm happy you're seeing someone mate, all the best.

 

[Twoslabs]

Absolutely I was suicidal for a number of years. Do I still feel that way? I can honestly say no. The assistance I received has helped and continues to help. It may not seem like it right now, but there is light at the end of the tunnel ☺

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

What's the go with alcohol? Do I abstain altogether? (I forgot to ask today at my appointment). For a long, long time I've not been one to have 'a few quiet ones'. It was always in ridiculous amounts to numb everything. I drink to forget I'm here.

I've always been told I was an attractive man (not just from my mother either!) but my confidence levels, overall self-esteem and how I perceive myself have destroyed me. So whenever I'd go out, if I do find anyone, it's 'any old port in a storm' so to speak because I've just wanted anyone that'd have me, and all while I was copious amounts of alcohol deep. I don't want to be that way anymore.

There's also been countless times when I've rolled up pissed to meeting friends or events because I've not thought I was worthy to be there - my overall self-esteem and confidence is shot. I could also never work out why I've also fled events to be by myself...and I think it's so nobody sees me if I break down. Subconsciously I've probably wanted to just get out.

Today was a quick appointment and I've been referred to a psychologist for assessment and then a plan to sort it all out. I think it's going to take a long time. I just hope that I don't get misunderstood or anything at my next meeting and they think the problem is less severe than what it is.

 

[NotAMagpieBogan]

I have a close friend who is in a very deep depression, and suicidal. It breaks my heart. I'm not good with words and I feel like I'm not doing enough to help her. She has many friends but not many who she actually talks about this sort of stuff with. I tell her to stay positive and to keep her head up. She has had very hard life, drug abuse in her family, lots of fights in her, and I think much more that she hasn't told anyone, so she is both strong but also can be quite sensitive.

 

[King Elvis]

See a psychologist for that, it'll be a start to help change your self perception.

How old are you?

What do you do for a living?

What's your health like? Fat/skinny? Fit/unhealthy?

 

[Freofalcon]

I was where you are about ten years ago. I was lucky I had a couple of awesome mates who wouldn't leave me alone about getting help. Best thing I ever did. Every journey begins with a first step. Its surprising how liberating talking out your issues can be and putting plans in place to sort your issues out .

Good luck and all the best for you.

 

[Cleavy]

good luck IUB. *hugs*

 

[Better Loosen Up]

Glad to hear you made your first appointment today mate. I doubt you will be misunderstood... You will probably be more understood then you have ever been.

Drinking alcohol releases dopamine or something like that in your brain which is what temporarily masks the true feelings.

Like Yidaki mentioned, a healthy lifestyle can make a big difference. In addition, drinking plenty of water and good sleep is important.

You've made a positive step in the right direction. Stick at it and eventually you will be rewarded.

Maybe stop watching the Roos for a bit as well