- Jan 15, 2012
- 48,732
- 49,595
- AFL Club
- Richmond
It's pretty rude taking up a 4 seat table, why can't you sit at the bar or somewhere elseGiven I’m not playing in this game (I don’t do charity), I thought I’d sit down with some sushi and dumplings and watch. Unfortunately for me, I did something I never do. After purchasing my food, I sat in the food court with the commoners to eat. Seriously! What was I thinking?!
First this woman walks up and asked me if I’ll be at the table for long. I asked to define “long”. She huffed and puffed at me. So I asked her if I had angered her in some way. She said I shouldn’t take up a four seat table when I’m on my own. I politely replied “fair point. Now, how does go **** yourself sound?!”
Then! , somewhere between my dumplings and salt n pepper squid, the cutest little girl came over to my table and with the most magnificent smile, said “hi, you must be very hungry”. To which I replied, “go away little girl”. She then began to slam her hands on my table and yelled “you shouldn’t say that! You shouldn’t say that! You shouldn’t say that...” over and over again. I grabbed her cute little hand, and said “stop doing that and go away, or else I will walk over to your parents table, and punch the **** out of both of them!” She left crying. Which was almost as annoying as her table slapping.
Then! Some peasant feral on the table behind me takes a call on his phone and enters into one of the dumbest and LOUDEST conversations I’ve ever heard. “YEAH MATE, NAH, I FINK I WERE GONNA GO TOMORROW BUT ME CAR **** ITSELF AGAIN, SO NAH, YEAH IT’S NOT LIKE UMM...”
**** me! I tried to bite my tongue, but it was just so painful. So...
Me:”oi! Hang up, eat your food and please shut the **** up!”
Feral: “me?”
Me: “no, the other **** wit yelling pure stupidity down his phone. Yes you! Shut up mate!”
He apparently was offended by this and he, and what I assumed was his mother, got up and left.
Then! Just as I’m on my third lobster sush roll, some “shopping centre security guard” comes over and says he’s had complaints about me being “disruptive and displaying anti social behaviour”
I said “mate, I’m a ****en Doctor!” I then explained to him, that “the only anti social behaviour going on was that of the ignorant, cousin *******, ferals, I’m surrounded by”
I then got up and left.
What is wrong with people?!
This is why I never leave the house! This is why I shouldn’t have left it today, and this is precisely why 90% of the population should walk into the ocean, and keep going.
Anyway, who won?
Anyway I only read half your story, I shall continue later on.