Mega Thread The Random Thoughts Thread Part 2: Electric Portaloo

[Portia]

More than a year of managing dental pain in my 20s because I couldn't afford a dentist to do extensive patchup at the time. When I could, a couple of teeth ended up being pulled (much cheaper than what they would've said to do earlier), which afterwards was the best ****ing feeling ever.

 

[Magpiespower]

HAPPY BATMAN DAY!!!

 

[Doctor Feel]

Mine would be between stepping straight on a glass jar in barefoot with all my weight resulting in 19 stitches, or popping two discs in my back on a deadlift and the resulting nerve pain and all other sorts of shit afterwards when recovering.

 

[Portia]

Oh also the time I broke my leg at the Ice Arena and discovered just how loud a proper shout sounded there.

 

[Prison bar Pete]

Mine would be between stepping straight on a glass jar in barefoot with all my weight resulting in 19 stitches, or popping two discs in my back on a deadlift and the resulting nerve pain and all other sorts of shit afterwards when recovering.

I think for this subject "like" means "sympathy"

 

[Doctor Feel]

HAPPY BATMAN DAY!!!

All the batman games are like 75% off on Steam lol

 

[Lagooner]

Another cricket bat one.

I was keeping right up against the stumps in a schoolyard game and stood up at the wrong time, putting my head in the trajectory of a fully-fledged pull shot. I got hit just above my left eye and opened up like a bag of chips as they (primary-coloured douche canoes) say.

There was so much blood on my face it looked like I'd been the victim of a terrorist attack, but the wound was actually fairly small so it was only 6 stitches.

 

[Zakk Wylde]

2 front teeth knocked out with a hockey stick from a full swing.

Having my thumb/knuckle shattered after a cricket ball hit the end of it whilst fielding.

 

[manureid]

Another cricket bat one.

I was keeping right up against the stumps in a schoolyard game and stood up at the wrong time, putting my head in the trajectory of a fully-fledged pull shot. I got hit just above my left eye and opened up like a bag of chips as they (primary-coloured douche canoes) say.

There was so much blood on my face it looked like I'd been the victim of a terrorist attack, but the wound was actually fairly small so it was only 6 stitches.

This exact same thing happened to me in an indoor net (cricket training with cricket ball etc). Hit right on the bone above my left eye. No blood amazingly. Eye closed over though in seconds i reckon. 3 days before i started to be able to open it.

 

[GreyPower]

Getting an in-grown toenail scraped out by a GP a few years ago....I was given gas for the pain, but made no difference, and I screamed my head off.

Getting fingers caught when car boot slammed shut, when I was a kid, wasnt much fun either.

 

[John the Butcher]

The amount of tingles out in force in Kmart guernseys is laughable

 

[Portwon]

Long story short was quite unwell over 3 weeks or so and they couldn't work out what it was so they decided to whip out the appendix.

Woke up hours after the surgery and my right leg was bigger than Daren Jarman at his slowdown best. Massive blood clots so they decided to take me to scans CT, Ultrasound etc.

As it was eight hours or so after the surgery they wheeled me down and lifted me onto the scanning bed. I don't know if they told the orderly's that lifted me if I was post op but they dropped me the last couple of cm/mm/ hundred feet onto the bed.

Now I have a bad back, have broken my nose and various other things and feel I have a reasonable threshold for pain but hitting that bed felt like Dr Lecter had taken all my skin off turned it inside out and put it back on while simultaneously shoving a white hot poker up my jacksie.

Not sure where the scream came from inside me but looking back it reminded me of the scene in the IT crowd where Jen can never find a bloody pen.

oh and it wasn't the appendix.

 

[raman]

I have literally never had a serious injury or illness. The worst pain I've ever experienced was a throat infection.

#cupcake

 

[tribey]

I have literally never had a serious injury or illness. The worst pain I've ever experienced was a throat infection.

#cupcake

Q. What's your secret?

A. AIDS

 

[bomberclifford]

Describe the most painful things you have experienced. Go!

View attachment 289607

Back when I was courting Mrs Bomber, we went away for a secluded weekend in a cabin at Deep Creek.

On the last night I was preparing a romantic dinner wearing nothing but boxer shorts and a wry smile. Placed a fresh tuna steak into a griddle pan with heated olive oil and the perfect seal made by the tuna and the pan squirted hot oil along the grooves of the pan, up the curved edge and onto my chest, abdomen and left hand.

Skin blistered immediately and I looked like a plague victim from a bad 80s disaster film.

The pain of the initial burn did not dissipate for several days.

Spent the next week or so sleeping with an ice bucket next to my bed to numb the pain of the burn while I slept.

 

[_VXV]

Got thrown off my bike when I was a kid & rode a fence railing for about 5 metres by my balls. Had to get my sack cut open, balls laid out & untangled etc. Thankfully 2 kids later everything still worked.

Last Saturday morning after going to the show the day before I had to untangle my kids boomerang balls, took me back to a dark place.

 

[raman]

Back when I was courting Mrs Bomber, we went away for a secluded weekend in a cabin at Deep Creek.

On the last night I was preparing a romantic dinner wearing nothing but boxer shorts and a wry smile. Placed a fresh tuna steak into a griddle pan with heated olive oil and the perfect seal made by the tuna and the pan squirted hot oil along the grooves of the pan, up the curved edge and onto my chest, abdomen and left hand.

Skin blistered immediately and I looked like a plague victim from a bad 80s disaster film.

The pain of the initial burn did not dissipate for several days.

Spent the next week or so sleeping with an ice bucket next to my bed to numb the pain of the burn while I slept.

But did you score?

 

[Dylan8]

 

[Magus]

Doing a poo without enough fibre in my diet.

 

[bomberclifford]

But did you score?

There was a reason I was only wearing boxers.

Mrs Bomber still laughs at me to this day.

 

[Duck Farmer]

Got thrown off my bike when I was a kid & rode a fence railing for about 5 metres by my balls. Had to get my sack cut open, balls laid out & untangled etc.

You win.

 

[manureid]

Got thrown off my bike when I was a kid & rode a fence railing for about 5 metres by my balls. Had to get my sack cut open, balls laid out & untangled etc. Thankfully 2 kids later everything still worked.

Last Saturday morning after going to the show the day before I had to untangle my kids boomerang balls, took me back to a dark place.

You win.

'

Agreed.

 

[_VXV]

You win.

Finally win something & it's this?
Fml

 

[Lagooner]

Finally win something & it's this?
Fml

I'll never look at your avatar the same way again!

 

[bomberclifford]

I'll never look at your avatar the same way again!

I was just thinking the same thing.

I have a testicle story, not as brutal as VXV's, but it's prolly not suitable for a public forum.