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van Berlo >>>> you

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Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

October 1962 and the world is on the edge of nuclear war.

US spy planes have conclusive photos of Russian missile installations on Cuba, so close to continental USA. The US mobilises a blockade of Cuba, the Russians respond and so for two weeks the world watches and waits for the outcome of "The Cuban Missile Crisis"

cuban-missiles.jpg


Or so we all thought.

Only Pentagon insiders know the real story.

On 16 October a US U2 spy plane took a photo of Van Berlo strolling on a beach in eastern Cuba. US Intelligence immediately recognised the most dangerous weapon in the world was so close to the USA that everyone panicked. The reason the crisis took so long to resolve was that Van Berlo didn't want to end his holiday in Cuba.

To this day all this is known as "The Cuban Missile Crisis". The US govt considered that this name and the threat of worldwide nuclear war was much less scary to the US population than disclosing the real threat - "The Van Berlo Crisis".
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

VAn Berlo has been dethroned by the Dale and Dids show.

Dale and Dids >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Van Berlo

Dale >>>>>>>>>>>>>> VB

DIDS >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>VB
 

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Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Armageddon said:
VAn Berlo has been dethroned by the Dale and Dids show.

Dale and Dids >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Van Berlo

Dale >>>>>>>>>>>>>> VB

DIDS >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>VB

The executor of your estate or the the primary beneficiaries of your will can close your BigFooty account after Van Berlo visits you tonight.
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Armageddon said:
VAn Berlo has been dethroned by the Dale and Dids show.

Dale and Dids >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Van Berlo

Dale >>>>>>>>>>>>>> VB

DIDS >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>VB
:D:D:D:D your a knob.-Van Berlo to Armageddon 19/05/06, shortly before kicking his arse.
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Van Berlo was really p1ssed off with his Cuban holiday being curtailed by President Kennedy and the US Navy. He went underground for almost a year, cruising around the islands of the West Indies.

He got a liking for ganja, but due to his extraordinary lungs smoked the entire 1963 Jamaican crop with Desmond Dekker one night in Kingston, celebrating the recording of Dekker's classic "Honour Your Father and Mother".

DesmondDekker.jpg


Bored with the local ganja shortage and not popular with the strung out locals, Van Berlo drifted around Central America before wandering around Southern USA.

On 22nd November 1963 he found himself sinking some bucket bongs with some beat poets on a grassy knoll in Dallas. He looked up, saw Kennedy's motorcade, spat at him and blew off the top of Kennedy's head.

Spot Van Berlo

JFKmotorcade.jpg
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Van Berlo counted to infinity – twice

When Van Berlo gets his tax papers he sends them back with a picture of himself crouched and ready to strike – Van Berlo has never payed taxes. The ATO pay taxes to Van Berlo

Van Berlo doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Van Berlo.
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

A combination of poor southern US weed and the investigations of the Warren Commission saw Van Berlo quietly leave the USA in 1964.

After going up Niagra Falls in a barrel, he got bored with North America and swam across the Pacific to Vietnam in July. Minding his own business snorkling and wrestling with sharks in the Gulf of Tonkin, he was attacked again by the US Navy and punched out 2 US destroyers in August. One was the USS Maddox:

H97900.jpg



President Johnson realised the gravity of the Van Berlo threat, and immediately committed ground forces to Vietnam.

Pursued by President Johnson and the US armed forces, he swam to Australia and went undercover as a local fisherman at Portsea near Melbourne. Van Berlo had 3 years of peace until his superb fishing skills landed an Australian Prime Minister in December 1967.

Haroldholt.jpg
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Armageddon said:
VAn Berlo has been dethroned by the Dale and Dids show.

Dale and Dids >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Van Berlo

Dale >>>>>>>>>>>>>> VB

DIDS >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>VB


Shh! He'll hear you!

Last time someone talked garbage about Van Berlo it was a fisherman in indonesia... VB got so mad he unleashed his drop punt of doom on the fishing boat, killing the man instantly while at the same time causing the Tsunami disaster.
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Van Berlo was running out of places to hide by late 1967.

He was behind the Cuban Missile Crisis, assassinated President Kennedy, started the Vietnam War with the Gulf of Tonkin incident and killed Australian Prime Minister Harold Holt in December 1967.

He had no alternative but swim to Vietnam again, reaching Haiphong Harbour on 6th January 1968 where he was greeted by General Võ Nguyên Giáp.

Vo_Nguyen_Giap_Vietnam.jpg



Hunted by the USA and Australia, Van Berlo took out Vietnamese citizenship, changed his name to name to "Tet" and headed into South Vietnam towards Saigon.
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Uner the pseudonym of "Tet", Van Berlo was so p1ssed off with the USA he decided to attack all their forces in Vietnam in late January 1968.

With a handful of Vietcong, he attacked US and South Vietnamese forces across the South, earning his single handed efforts the name "The Tet Offensive".

Not all his Vietcong colleagues had the the steel of Van Berlo, and he knew how to deal with them:

Nguyen.jpg
 

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Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Armageddon said:
VAn Berlo has been dethroned by the Dale and Dids show.

Dale and Dids >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Van Berlo

Dale >>>>>>>>>>>>>> VB

DIDS >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>VB

You better have triple titanium doors and windows in your house cause VB is on his way over to Melbourne and will deal with your insolence once he dispatches of the Tigers with one hand!
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Punchy Bassett said:
You better have triple titanium doors and windows in your house cause VB is on his way over to Melbourne and will deal with your insolence once he dispatches of the Tigers with one hand!

Don't worry Punchy, the person responsible for posting that anti-VB propaganda is already dead. Nathan was combing his hair at the time, when his psychic powers warned him of the infidel. Not being vindictive, VB sent just twelve trillion volts through him (static electricity).

Van Berlo as a high school prank (after creating the internet for fun) decided to invade the system himself. He has a sneaky subroutine set up that automatically selects the next most probable victim of VB's wrath and allocates the name Armageddon to them.

Life expectancy is in the order of tenths of a second.
 
Re: Van Berlo plus nothing for nothing, because he's :D:D:D:D

Southerntakeover said:
When God said, "Let there be light", Van Berlo said, "say please."


:D


The only way we are going to sort out who is the best player amongst Van Berlo and MacLean and all the young guns in the comp is to clear all of them to the bulldogs for one season and I'll decide.


You blokes can have them all back to their original clubs at the end of that season. I promise.
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

I hearby decree that this thread be made an announcement so it is on the top of every page on bigfooty.


...even though I have no power at all



...but VAN BERLO would want it this way!
 

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Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

After being behind the Cuban Missile Crisis, Van Berlo assassinated President Kennedy, started the Vietnam War with the Gulf of Tonkin incident, killed Australian Prime Minister Harold Holt and single handedly launched the Tet offensive late January 1968.

Panic set in with the American population, who later in 1968 elected this man to stop Van Berlo:

Nixon.jpg



He needed the best and most nefarious minds to counter Van Berlo, so he appointed this guy with the express mission of stopping Van Berlo around the world.

kissinger.gif



Better dead than VB! was the Administration's catch cry. Nixon even turned to Communist China to help fight the Van Berlo menace.

Nixon_meets_Mao_in_China_1972.gif


Chairman Mao and President Nixon shake on their secret agreement to stop Van Berlo.
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

Leon Trosky leading his Red Army to deafeat the army which is Nathan Van Berlo.

untitled2io2.png
 
Re: All Hail Nathan Van Berlo

If Van Berlo is late, time better slow the f*ck down

Van Berlo can divide by zero

Most men are okay with their wives fantasizing about Van Berlo during sex, because they are doing the same thing

Van Berlo clogs the toilet even when he p1sses

Van Berlo can speak braille !!

Van Berlo once ate three 2 KG steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress

Van Berlo refers to himself in fourth person.
 

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van Berlo >>>> you

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